who learned that the only way to live was to die a little first//
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Struggling.
I feel as if the world around me is continuously in fast forward. I am convinced that in my reality, time stands still for moments and fast forwards for others. Depression has this way of making me feel disassociated. It has this way of making me feel nothing and then everything at the same time. I sometimes wonder if people look at me and realize I am struggling. Is it something obvious? Everyone around me seems to be able to move forward... move on... continue to grow. How? How does their time continue to just effortlessly keep going?
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And here it comes... the post I knew I would end up writing but the one I hoped wouldn’t need to be written.
It’s almost as if I had jinxed myself. Did I set myself up this time?
Did I do this to myself?
I would love to be angry. I would love to be spiteful. But I’m just hurt.
Hurting again. Crying again. Wondering why this always happens to me... again.
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