cr4shc0urse

[cr4shc0urse]

— WITH @1nfernoh:

[...] “There’s probably somewhere in town to buy them. I bet like, seventy-five percent of the old and new production crew smokes.” Maybe more. All he has to do is be a little discreet about it, he’s not a big enough name for anyone to want to bother looking all that closely at him. Nobody is waiting around curious to see  how Kiyong takes his coffee in the morning, it should likely make him feel bitter, but it doesn’t. He likes his privacy. She keeps talking and he blinks his eyes hard, twice, to try and wake himself up enough for a conversation. “God. The fucking dinner. I should’ve backed out the moment they told everyone to pack formal wear.” He lets his head fall against the wall at his back, adds more ash to the tiny pile growing somewhere near his thigh. “No way they don’t serve alcohol, right?” Kiyong hadn’t actually bothered to read most of the information provided to him, maybe he should already know the answer to that question.

kiyong looks and sounds tired. in a way, that's relieving; she won't have to kick up her energy to match. her own shoulders slouch once kiyong leans back against the wall, and she has to rub her eyes to keep yawning from just looking at him. a second later, there's a rustle as she pulls off her jacket and lays it out behind her to lay on, looking up at all that dark. "mm, true. i don't know how else you'd pass the time in a place like this."

self reflection? self healing? writing? it should probably be writing. this is a decent place to exist away from city noise and do something for herself, but sunhee thinks that people sometimes have to be born a certain way to do certain things. maybe if she'd been born a different way, with different blueprints for the way her existence would unfold, she would've spent this night in her room good and grateful for the silence. maybe. digging deeper into that would require her to be less sober, and she's trying not to fall into a substance dependency before they even get through a week, so she chooses to focus on the snowfall of ash that kiyong sends to the ground instead.

the smell of nicotine is weirdly comforting. it makes her think of the recording studio, of her father having a morning smoke at hidden times in the morning he didn't think she would see. sunhee's fingers twitch over her ratty band shirt, plucking out the opening notes of an old song. she wonders how this place sounds to kiyong; she wonders if he hears the music in it sometimes.

but that would be crazy talk.

"there is a bar in that ballroom," she murmurs, remembering the staff she'd seen going in and out of the doors. "i saw them bringing crates in there yesterday, so i'm hoping they didn't just blow the budget on a hundred hidden cameras and got us something good. actually, you know," she pauses, "it has to be good, because good alcohol will get people talking about the kind of stuff they want on broadcast." she tilts her head aside, eyes sliding over to kiyong with the kind of amusement that implies she doesn't put any stock in it at all. "what about you? anything scary in the last six months that oh kiyong's adoring fans are dying to hear about?"

[cr4shc0urse]

— OPEN (0/1):

SCENE. several days into arrival week, at the HOTEL. MUSE has given themselves a minor injury, and SUNHEE's the only one around to see.

"WELL, MAYBE THEY'LL SPIN A SIDEPLOT OUT OF THIS and you'll get more screentime," sunhee points out with a wry grin.

it doesn't look too bad. what was a horror reunion without some blood and flesh wounds? "uh, here. you should probably run that under some water or something. is your bathroom near here?" she hands over her towel, silently apologizing to the staff for the stain that that's going to leave on the pristine white cloth.

the whole reason she'd gotten lost in this place for the last two hours was to find that stupid towel, but it would have been more awkward if she'd just walked past someone clearly hurt. her good old father always warned her about sowing good karmic energy anyway, and she can hear his rattling voice in the back of her mind, pointing out that she's literally staying in a horror movie town. sunhee, what if it's you someday?

unlikely, but the blood isn't a pretty sight. she's not squeamish, but her imagination's been running overactive, and morbid, for the last year, and it can't help but paint the possibilities worse and worse. better to see it through now. "what even happened? and don't say anything about the curse, or i'm taking the towel back and letting you bleed out."

[cr4shc0urse]

— WITH @1nfernoh:

ABOUT TEN MINUTES BEFORE SHE STARTS DOWN THE LONG PATH INTO TOWN, sunhee remembers that she doesn't have to go so far to be alone.

it's taken about three days for her new reality to set in and one more for the inevitable claustrophobia. her mother had always wondered for her if a change of scenery would be nice, if it would help with the writing or the band these days, and in a fit of wistfulness sunhee used to wonder if she was right and that the answers to her problems were just an airline ticket way. a part of her had looked forward to the show for that. but this is little like what she'd been expecting.

she glances up at the hotel. at night, it looks older than the website said it did, and it seems to peer down on things on the ground. not enough to be noticeable, but enough to be unsettling. sunhee chalks this up to secondhand madness and turns and continues her way off.

kiyong had shown her this spot early on when he found her trying to bury a camera in one of the flower pots in the back. sunhee isn't embarrassed to admit that she's already been back a couple of times since, mostly to answer her mother's text messages without being paranoid that a camera was zooming in on her screen, but tonight she hasn't been able to get any service. it's good and it's bad: she has nothing to do.

so when she ducks out of the last camera's line of sight and finds kiyong already at the spot, she's mildly relieved.

"oh. hey." she doesn't know anything too meaningful about kiyong outside the kinds of crowds he used to hang out in, but she does know that he's one of the only other people here being sane about things lately. that's a good enough reason to not write him off, for now. "aren't you going to run out if you keep smoking this much?" sunhee drops down next to him with a grunt, clicking her phone's flashlight off at the same time. the homescreen informs her that her message has failed to send again. "i think you'll need it more for the dinner," she says dryly, eyeing his lighter.

[cr4shc0urse]

— WITH @velveteenr4bbit:

SUNHEE HAS NEEDED A SMOKE SINCE SHE FIRST GOT ON THAT PLANE. her first time flying since she was 8 and trying to travel with her mother and finding out the hard way that she couldn't handle it, and it's for a reunion with these people she barely knows. what a waste.

she's sure that the resentment is mutual. she felt it from the tv crew all day, the snide little looks they threw her in direction every time they caught her poking at one of the not-so-hidden cameras, and that was fine. this isn't anything that she isn't already used to.

but this isn't just the usual anymore — she doesn't just have cameras shoved in her face, she's got cameras shoved in her face while they've backed her into some glass box, and maybe this was a mistake. maybe she should've called in sick or insane like the smart ones did.

she goes to the courtyard because she figures that if she's lucky, the crew will buy into this local hocus-pocus about the statues coming to life at night, and they'll save this place to be mic'd up for last. she still has some time: the sun is just now brushing the horizon, smearing orange low across the sky. the rest of it is a dark, impassive navy, dotted with faint stars starting to show.

she isn't looking where she's going, so she doesn't see minji until it's too late. oh, that's funny. that's fucking hilarious.

"sorry, didn't think anyone was here." she's dealt with too much today already, and there's been a minji-shaped rock lodged in her brain since the last time they talked and it gives her a headache every time she thinks about it. sunhee pivots, starts to walk back the way she'd come, except—

"actually." she pivots again. she frowns. she looks at minji, just existing on this courtyard bench, and frowns harder. "are we good?"

she doesn't think she's been on this side of this particular conversation before. it's humbling, and unbearable for other reasons. she hates the sound of the words to her own ears and the implied request for reassurance when there was nothing to be reassured about. they were fucking, and then they weren't. her reassurance should have been that month of radio silence, actually. aren't there worse ways to fall out with somebody?

"if we've got a problem, i'm not hashing it out for tv ratings or whatever. i just want to know so i don't make any more assumptions." she casts a wary look around the courtyard, her eyes lingering on the weeping woman. something about the deep clench of her shoulders, the leading lines of her mouth wrought into a sob behind her hands, makes sunhee's skin crawl.

[cr4shc0urse]

INTRODUCTION

hiii again, this is my (duha) second muse bae sunhee ('96, she/they), guitarist of last light & family disappointment. like i mentioned in my other intro, you can like this post if you're interested in plotting a thread with her (feel free to choose between her or taejun hehe)! i'm down to pre-plot something established or go off of chem. sunhee in particular is more open ended since she wasn't present on set as much, but she definitely gets around, so there's a decent chance they've already into each other off set or will see her around now (threat).

fun fact: she did, in fact, rent out her own studio to get drunk & high in while she was supposed to be helping her bandmates get the album together for the movie. this comes during her tailspin after her father's unexpected passing, which happened to break news around the same time their band is signed for the soundtrack, so her fallout with that collided spectacularly with their film involvement.

TOP 3 SONGS CREDITED TO BAE SUNHEE

"late bloom" - performed by last light, lyrics credited under sunhee's name. the lyrics allude to a narrator who has taken too long to realize their feelings for a girl, likening the realization to a flower's late bloom.

"friends in high places" - performed by last light, lyrics credited under sunhee's name. the lyrics play on the notion of having "friends in high places," though instead of it referring to having friends with social/political power, it refers to friends who are better-adjusted and in "higher" places in life.

"so anyway" - released as an unofficial recording on her personal twitter account in september 2024. a slow, dissonant rock, considered a departure from last light's sound but not entirely from her personality. the lyrics are through the perspective of someone talking to objects in their apartment as they're moving out.

TIMELINE

born to her loving parents bae jungho & bae heejin. they separate on amicable terms when she's 2, and they remain such responsible parents about it that later on, sunhee can't really point the cause of her neuroses towards a fractured family.

she just happens to become closer with her father. her mother is a decorated researcher and travels frequently for conferences, so sunhee grows up mostly with her dad. bae jungho is a retired classical musician, who was once a child prodigy. not a huge name with the normies, but definitely in the classical music world.

there are great expectations for sunhee at a young age, but again, her parents are remarkably responsible and remind her, over and over, that she can be anything she wants, that she can take her time, that she's allowed to make mistakes. sunhee thinks that's easy to say for people who are born gifted & so effortless about their contributions to Society. despite her parents' joint nurturing, she grows up troubled and constantly feeling like she's running out of time to be remarkable.

her father was a prodigy at 12. at 21, sunhee is sneaking out to rock concerts and hooking up with girls with cool guitars, pretending she doesn't care that she's probably disappointing her parents. she doesn't. they remind her constantly that they could never be disappointed in her, so. so.

the band saves her, in a way. gives her accountability, something to be responsible for that isn't just her hungover self. she latches, but soon her self sabotaging streak rears its ugly head.

at 27, her father passes. he leaves her most of his fortune, a nice little nest egg that's supposed to help her pursue her dreams. to his dying breath, he's a good father.

sunhee uses that money to rent the studio.

she still has it rented to her name to this day. she's had a piano brought in since; she's been starting to get back into piano again, as a side project from the band. sometimes, when she crashes out in the studio, she swears she can hear her father's favorite pieces playing. like he used to before, they help lull her to sleep.

IMPRESSIONS ON & OFF SET

whenever she visited the set, she gave the impression of being in a hurry. if you asked if she was busy, she would bluntly but honestly tell you no. she seemed unaware of the brusque nature she gives off.

off set, she's unfortunately a cliche of a troubled rockstar hurtling towards self destruction. sunhee seems aware of that, though. the bad publicity doesn't get to her --- not because she doesn't care, but because she seems to already know everything they say as a fact about herself.

makes friends fast, lets herself lose them fast.

abides by two adages: 1) people can't be disappointed in you if you set their expectations low from the beginning, and 2) no one really knows what the fuck they're doing with their lives, and the best you can do is sometimes go in and out of each other's and help make it good for a little while. you don't live the kind of life that people would want to end up in. if people go, then it's for the better, especially for them.

feels weirded out about everyone's reactions to this "curse." to her, she didn't experience anything, bc she just chalked up the "hearing your dead dad play piano to you" as part of her grief at the time. very steven crain from hill house the show about it, outspoken about the very real possibility that maybe they are all just psychologically troubled, not haunted.

CONNECTIONS

in place of a plots page for now, here are some pre-established connections she can have if anyone's interested:

closed. (fem locked, 27+ locked) regular fwbs who started seeing each other after the movie. sunhee is pretty strict about having no strings attached, but this might be the longest genuine connection she's had with someone (read: she doesn't immediately turn around and walk away when she sees them in a public setting). it's a little weird now that they'll see each other regularly, but they're both gotten good at ignoring everything else in favorite of a quick thrill.

(fem locked, 27+ locked) childhood friends, potentially a first love. i would love if this connection formed when they were younger and sunhee was less of a wreck as she is now. she would've been sweet on muse, though ultimately her personality would have never allowed her to actually pursue it. they reconnected at some point during the 2024 filming, but time has changed their dynamic --- we could plot out exactly how it did. ideally i'd love for the love that sunhee had for this muse to have transcended romantic love by now, and instead this muse just holds a special place in sunhee's heart. she'd be rather protective of them in present day.

a lyrical muse. one of the many inspirations for a song that sunhee wrote for their band...but inspiration can take so many forms. i'd love if this muse actually inspired one of her angriest songs LMAO, out of a pure hatred (onesided or mutual).

an "apprentice." apprentice is a loose term here. this muse would be someone, likely younger, who either has an interest in music, last light, or just thinks sunhee is cool in general (oh god). unfortunately, sunhee is not a good influence and regularly exposes muse to partying, alcohol, drugs, and other generally unsavory practices.

(25+ locked) a mutual bad influence. someone who shares a fascination in seeing just how bad things can get. they fuel each other's self destructive tendencies, are the worst enablers of their worst habits...but also find a weird companionship in waking up absolutely shitfaced from it together afterwards. the habit only picks up now that they're on this reunion together.

a stranger who knows you too well. they crossed paths during one of sunhee's crashouts post-filming. emotions were running high for both of them, and maybe they ended up almost or for real getting into trouble together that night, but it ended in them having an unexpected heart-to-heart about the things they were going through at the time. part of the reason they let their guards down was because both assumed they'd never see each other again after that, but, well...here they are now, still carrying around those little broken pieces of each other's hearts nbd.

fellow family disappointments. nursing any feelings of guilt, doom, fatalism, nihilism, or anything of the like? sunhee wants to hash it out over some alcohol --- or not. are they as emotionally stunted as her? that's okay, let's bring on the alcohol anyway.

"roommate." the one she's sharing a bathroom with for this trip... this is open to anyone and doesn't have to be pre-plotted, but if you DO want to plot smth specific involving them being neighbors then just let me know. :]

[cr4shc0urse]

“you think you’re doing this because you’re loyal. but you’re not. you’re just scared.”

for your own good - leah horlick, mafia: definitive edition (hangar 13), bloodsport - yves olade, a primer for the small weird loves - richard siken, the end of poetry - ada limón, velvet hounds - aimee seu, as consciousness is harnessed to flesh: journals and notebooks (1964-1980) - susan sontag, mafia: definitive edition (hangar 13), boyish - japanese breakfast

[cr4shc0urse]

OVERVIEW

[ currently viewing this page as @/cr4shc0urse ] … did you see? yesterday, BAE SUNHEE (SHE/THEY) was spotted at the airport! you know, that 28 year old who was part of that one film's MEDIA ARTISTS? the cursed one that they never finished? yeah, they were the SOUNDTRACK ARTIST / GUITARIST OF LAST LIGHT! i know everyone already knows they're RESTLESS and A CARBON COPY OF THEIR FATHER, but i heard that WHILE THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO BE HELPING WITH THE ALBUM, THEY RENTED THEIR OWN PRIVATE STUDIO TO GET DRUNK AND HIGH IN. apparently they’re a MUSICIAN now, but i guess they’ve got unfinished business with this movie, or this movie’s got unfinished business with them.

RELATED LINKS

introduction

[cr4shc0urse]

A MAN WHO WORRIES OVER ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING

"Clock NOW", by Caroline Cadenza (2011) (situated in "Tide Tables Cafe" Richmond, Surrey, UK); // "Ivan the Terrible" (1945), by Sergei Eisenstein; // "The Night of the Iguana" (1964), by John Huston; // "Darkest Dungeon"; // @mlgrsdesing; // "Alien in a Small Town" (2014), by Jim Cleaveland; // "Basket Case", by Green Day; // "Crime and Punishment" (1935), by Josef von Sternberg; // Unknown; // "Batman: The Killing Joke" (1988), by Alan Moore

[cr4shc0urse]

LOVE ME

Boyish - Japanese Breakfast / Lovefool - The Cardigains / Love Me More - Mitski

[cr4shc0urse]

get some, pull up the ladder when the flood comes, throw enough rope until the legs have swung, seven new ways that you can eat your young.