cowboybabeop

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its awesome theres a vampire on sesame street because you need to introduce children to the concept as early as possible

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carrying all the groceries up so my wife doesnt have to

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fuck it. morningstar

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every so often i will come across a macklemore lyric that just… catches me so fucking off guard

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absolutely insane the daily rituals a cat will make you do. every night mr. business paws at my blankets until I lift them for him to go under, which he only actually does 20% of the time - he usually just looks in for a few seconds and purrs like he’s happy enough just thinking about it

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NEW SWORD (and buckler) DAY!!

that buckler is 15 inches across! It’s huge!

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can you take my white ass to funkytown

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hey girl peeing hard or hardly peeing

peeing hard sister were cracking that porcelain

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I did not know they were stackable ?????????

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at work we have a bartender named tyler and he collects wine corks so we put them in a little box for him and another bartender makes fun of him cause his t’s look like l’s so she wrote “lyler’s corks” and i saw it this morning and i grabbed a marker and changed the ‘c’ to a ‘g’

and after he left a bartender came up to me and said “aww lyler left his gorks” and i lost it