cornellasjournal

[cornellasjournal]

Seperti kamu ingin Tuhan menutupi aibmu, tahan mulutmu dari membicarakan kejelekan orang lain.

[cornellasjournal]

I’ve changed so much that I feel like I don’t know myself anymore.

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If you can’t run away from something, it means you have the capability to face it.

Jika kamu tidak bisa lari dari suatu hal, berarti kamu memiliki kekuatan untuk menghadapinya.

[cornellasjournal]

[cornellasjournal]

[cornellasjournal]

What I want in 2025 is very simple. I want to slow down.

Well, my job is still the same, independent auditor—that right now facing busy peak season— however I still want to keep things slower. 2024 was chaos and full of unpredictable things happened. I was burnt out and feel horrible about myself.

This year, I want to get my spark again. I want to pursue what I want and find back my hobbies, and just not think too much. I want to enjoy my time and cherish every moment. I want to embrace every opportunity to connect with kind people: my parents and very few close friends of mine.

More importantly, I want to reconnect with myself. I want to love myself and listen more to my voice, voice inside me. I don’t want to fill my head with loads of noises anymore. I want to prioritize serenity in my life.

[cornellasjournal]

لا شك أن الله يكفي 🕊

It is inevitable that there will be days when it feels heavier in the heart. When uncertainty knocks on our door and we are greeted with anxiety and impatience.

But we must not dwell on these moments too deeply. As all days will come to end, accept each day patiently as it comes.

It is important to honour our tawakkul, that we do not underestimate the power that it holds.

[cornellasjournal]

What I want in 2025 is very simple. I want to slow down.

Well, my job is still the same, independent auditor—that right now facing busy peak season— however I still want to keep things slower. 2024 was chaos and full of unpredictable things happened. I was burnt out and feel horrible about myself.

This year, I want to get my spark again. I want to pursue what I want and find back my hobbies, and just not think too much. I want to enjoy my time and cherish every moment. I want to embrace every opportunity to connect with kind people: my parents and very few close friends of mine.

More importantly, I want to reconnect with myself. I want to love myself and listen more to my voice, voice inside me. I don’t want to fill my head with loads of noises anymore. I want to prioritize serenity in my life.

[cornellasjournal]

Salah satu dari sedikit orang yang sangat senang bertemu denganku sesenang aku bertemu dengannya, dan sangat menghargai kehadiranku sebesar aku merindukannya; sudah meninggal.

Tahun ini semakin sepi dengan perginya teman2 terdekatku kembali ke kota asal mereka di luar jawa, atau merantau di negeri yang jauh, atau benar2 tidak kembali lagi ke dunia ini selamanya.

2024 lewat dengan begitu cepat namun benar-benar mengesankan: puluhan tantangan baru, puluhan memories menyenangkan yang tercipta, tapi juga tahun yang dikunjungi kejadian-kejadian yang membuka luka lama. Sekaligus tahun dimana sekali lagi aku belajar menyembuhkan diri di tengah kesibukan dalam pekerjaan.

Benar-benar mengesankan bukan? Hati manusia yang sering dianggap lemah ternyata bisa bertahan dari sekian banyak luka.

[cornellasjournal]

Everything is fine, everything is good. Everything is under control. (today's affirmation)

[cornellasjournal]

Change

These past weeks have been quite overwhelming. Two of my friends passed away, and it has left a deep mark on my heart. While at the same time, I still have to go to work everyday like nothing happened. Of course a lot of my colleague have tried to understand and share my condolences, but still, job is job. You gotta find a way to regain your focus.

I never imagined losing a friend would hurt this bad. Especially when you lose them at a young age, like I did. I never imagined any of my friends would be gone in their twenties, in our twenties.

And even though I red quotes about "The wisest man is the one who remembers death the most" quite often, it hits different when the person close to you actually facing death. It becomes, so real. A lot of "what if" going in my head. And I no longer feel life in this world as daunting as before. I used to feel anxious about my work, my career, my accomplishment, or what other people think of me. I don't know maybe this feeling is just temporary, because I still in the time of grieve; But, this experience surely changed me.

It changed how i see this world, and how i feel about this world. I no longer see struggle as much of a burden. My ambition towards this world is diminishing. Our time in this world is very short. We have no idea how "short" it would be. We just have to make sure that, when we leave this world, we're ready.

One of my friends that were passed away was very close to me. We spent our 4 years of college together. After I worked in different city, I always met her when I went back to my hometown. I used to imagine 6 years from now, she would be a professor at our university and we would live in the same neighborhood. But fate had other plans.

She was kind. Really kind. She was a pious person. And I miss her so much. I wish to meet her again in the hereafter but I don't feel anything like her. Not as kind, not as pious. And now, I just want to be a better person. Kinder, more sincere. So we can actually be neighbors, in Jannah, Insha Allah.

[cornellasjournal]

We will indeed die and leave everything we have in this world. But what we do, our deeds, will follow us until we die and determine the shape of our next life.

Let's keep ourselves busy doing good things.

[cornellasjournal]

[cornellasjournal]

There’s this quote that stuck to me ever since I read it, “be the kind of soul that others wish they could meet you a thousand times”.

الترجمة الصحيحة: ‏كن الروح التي يتمنى الآخرون مقابلتها ألف مرة.

To be the best of who you are, your heart and soul, for everyone that crosses your path. Be simplistic and powerful with your words, be meaningful in your actions, have purity in every intention you make. With Allah ‎in my heart, I want to make sure others see that first before they meet with me and that in itself is empowering in the most humble way.

I don’t want to leave a mark in this world. Allah already has.

[cornellasjournal]

Waktu memang tidak bisa diulang. Jadi daripada fokus ke waktu yang telah hilang, mari fokus ke waktu yang masih tersisa, di depan.

Mari coba sekali lagi. 🌹

[cornellasjournal]

How foolish we are to delay prayer, neglect reading the Quran, waste our time engaged in sin, and then sit and complain that life feels miserable. If we truly make Allah our number one priority, life will fall into place with ease. But when we prioritize instant gratification and temporary pleasure, life is guaranteed to feel meaningless.

[cornellasjournal]

Golden advice from Imam Ibn al-Qayyim (رحمه الله)

Do not carry the worries of this life because this is for Allāh and do not carry the worries of sustenance because it is from Allāh and do not carry anxiety for the future because it is in the Hands of Allāh.

Carry only one thing; how to please Allāh, because if you please Him, He pleases you, fulfils you & enriches you.