coquettegirl0808

[coquettegirl0808]

Welcome!

So you're here on my page. Welcome! My guess for the reason that you’re here is because you’re confused by seeing #coquette in the description under pictures of beautiful and miserable looking women.You’re confused yet curious on what that is. Well, you’re in the right place! On this account, I will do an expansive guide on how to achieve this “coquette” aesthetic. Not just on the outside, but on the interior too. 

[coquettegirl0808]

To become a coquette girl is quite simple. More than anything, being coquette is an aesthetic and a mindset. Much like the popular “emo” look that dominated popular culture in the 2000’s, the “coquette girl” dominates popular culture today. To put things in perspective, on the social platform TikTok, the hashtag “coquette” has over 5 billion views. “Coquette Aesthetic” has over 800 million views. 

What is a “coquette”? In literal terms it means “a woman who flirts”. More than anything, the aesthetic is an utter surrender to femininity and an embodiment of woman and girlhood. To be coquette is to drastically differentiate oneself from traditional masculine things. Being coquette can often be viewed as a step backwards for women, but it is the opposite. Women all over the world are relearning that traditional “feminie” things and interests don’t indicate one as inferior. Girls and women are embracing the side to them that's soft and girly once again; something that’s previously viewed as weak and less than in comparison to traditional masculine interests. 

As a woman who had to relearn a lot of internalized misogyny over the past couple of years, I’ve found solace in the “coquette aesthetic”. This change into being “coquette”, for me at least, did not come forced. I simply found myself loving many of the popular culture items that’s deemed as “coquette.” In this blog, I will advise you on what to do in order to embody this aesthetic and attitude.

pic cred: b4byfawn

[coquettegirl0808]

Acting coquette.  

So you want to embody the qualities of being coquette? I got you.  

[coquettegirl0808]

More than anything, a coquette girl is someone who leaves behind internalized misogyny; which often categorizes female emotions as signs of weakness. How many times have you heard a woman being called “too emotional” as an insult? In politics, it is a talking point for men to oppress perfectly qualified candidates simply for being women. In other fields, it is a form to disregard the suffering of women under the notion that they are innately just “emotional”. The coquette girl challenges this idea by amplifying our emotions; making them loud and clear. We verbalize anything and everything we’re feeling in the forms of art, music and words. We are not afraid to vocalize our pain in fear of being judged and perceived as less then because we know that feelings are not to be ashamed of. 

pic cred: girlwbloodsugar

[coquettegirl0808]

Dressing Coquette 

How do you dress to fit the aesthetic? To be coquette is to be hyper-femine and that can mean different ways of dressing for everyone. Here are just some popularized ways of dressing for your reference. 

[coquettegirl0808]

Heart shaped sunglasses. 

Popularized by Lana Del Rey in her song “Diet Mountain Dew” that reads “baby put on heart-shaped sunglasses cause we gonna take a ride”, the imagery of a woman with her hair blowing in the wind wearing red heart shaped sunglasses embodies the free and unapologetically feminine woman.

pic cred: sephysdiary

[coquettegirl0808]

Smoking

Yes, I hate to say it, but one of the hallmarks of dressing coquette is to have a cigarette in hand. Emphasis on cigarettes and not vapes. The reason why smoking cigarettes is so popular in coquette culture is to channel the “messy french girl”; a girl who is unbothered and sad at the same time. This woman is in her own world, an utter enigma to men. To amp up this look, get yourself an espresso and book as well. Congrats, you’ve embodied the mysterious woman that so many coquette girls strive to be.

pic cred: vintage-soleil

[coquettegirl0808]

Wearing western religious symbols 

Yes, I do understand that catholicism and christianity is not an aesthetic. However, the reason why things like wearing crosses, angel necklaces, and virgin mary symbols is such a powerful move is because religion is often used as an excuse to oppress, slutshame and belittle women. By proudly wearing these religious symbols ironically, a coquette girl is grasping back her power as a woman and renouncing the things that once oppressed her.

pic cred: Imhighbythebeach999

[coquettegirl0808]

Lace

This is another popular style that you can incorporate into your wardrobe to fit the aesthetic. Lace, like cherries, is something traditionally deemed as hyper-feminine; mostly only appearing in women’s attire. You can wear lace socks, underwear, shirts and pants with lace embroidery… Again, try to make lace the focal point of your outfit. Wearing anything too brightly or obnoxiously patterned with lace can make your outfit seem too chaotic.

pic cred: Myl0vrr

[coquettegirl0808]

Cherry patterns

Arguably the most popular pattern within the coquette community because what’s more feminine than dressing in the literal symbolism of a woman’s virginity? You can incorporate cherry patterned clothing into your outfits through dresses, shirts… But if you were to wear cherry patterns, try to make the rest of your outfits simple so patterns wouldn’t clash. 

pic cred: girlwbloodsugar

[coquettegirl0808]

Coquette literature and films 

“Coquette”movies and books are so much more than displaying women as weak. These movies deemed popular within the aesthetic proves that being coquette is not an anti-women movement; but to bring the struggles that are distinctly feminine onto the surface. 

[coquettegirl0808]

Gone Girl; movie and the book. 

More than anything, it is a depiction of female rage. Amy Dunne, after witnessing her husband cheat on her with a younger woman despite all the sacrifices she made in the marriage, plots a disappearance pinning the culprit onto her husband. Like Amy explained in her infamous monologue, so many women put on a facade of being the “cool girl” to appease men. Men, not realizing the sacrifices women go through, only care about appearances and cheat on their doting wives with young women. Instead of lying flat or just accepting this fact, Amy channels this rage and injustice into destroying her husband. Amy embodies the universal rage that so many women feel in the skewed power dynamic that is a marriage. 

pic cred: rahabq

[coquettegirl0808]

Jennifer’s Body; movie. 

A story about a beautiful high school girl who descends into killing and eating boys after a sexual assault. The murder of men by Jennifer tells a striking story about the lasting effects of violence against woman and the rage that ensues. Girls are so disporportionally affected by sexual violence and this tale deals with the often untalked about consequences on girls’ mentall being. Jennifer’s body is so much more than a horror movie; it shows the regaining of power and autonomy so many girls lost through sexual violence.

pic cred: m0ney

[coquettegirl0808]

Black Swan. 

A movie about a ballerina who spins into psychosis and delusions striving to be perfect. Nina, a ballerina, faces the universal struggle of so many girls; the obsession with perfectionism. Not only does she hold that standard on herself, it is iterated by her coach as well as her mother. This story resonates with so many girls because of the expectation society sets for them to be “perfect”. Women are held to such high standards and often it has catastrophic consequences to their mental/physical well being. So many girls see their struggles in this tormented ballerina.

pic cred: borntodiedemo

[coquettegirl0808]

The Virgin Suicides; the movie and the book. 

The story of the beautiful Lisbon sisters who commit suicide is told through the lens of infatuated boys, therefore, it is never revealed why the girls committed suicide. When Cecilia Lisbon is asked why she tried to kill herself, she says, “obviously doctor, you’ve never been a 13 year old girl.” The mysterious reasons for the suicide of these beautiful girls speaks to the unannounced and unexplained depression that originates from simply being a girl. So many girls struggle so intensely and in silence and this story crafts a beautiful ode to that feminine mystique.

pic cred: lullabiesinaglasswilderness

[coquettegirl0808]

Lolita; the movie and the book. 

A wildly problematic movie based on the book by Vladmir Nabokov; Lolita is about a girl who was groomed by an older man who came into her life as a step father. Overtime, the lines between their fatherly and lover relationship becomes blurred and Lolita falls into a tragic path. I do agree that this movie is dangerously romanticized by the coquette community as a love story. However, the actual reason that this movie and book is so popular within this “coquette” aesthetic is because of the portrayal of a frail female protagonist. It portrays girlhood as something so easily taken advantage of and alluring; a not often talked about side of femininity. 

pic cred: ch-err-y

[coquettegirl0808]

It would be irresponsible for me not to address a problem with being coquette. As you could probably tell from the pictures and inspirations used, the women “modeling” the coquette girl is white; the movies all depicted the stories of pretty white women. 

Where is the diversity? Where is the intersectionality of empowerment? As a woman of color looking into this aesthetic, I find myself asking the same questions. This brings me to an important point; and it applies to all the girls obsessed with coquette. Instead of trying to emulate the toxic traits of Amy Dunne, or romanticizing mental illness through watching Black Swan, understand that those stories are exaggerated for artistic purposes. 

Instead of spending copious amounts of money to buy the fashion and jewelry popularized by the coquette girl, view it as an inspiration to spice up your own wardrobe. 

The goal is not to emulate, but to be inspired by. 

pic cred: Minnirollz