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Being a woman with really very visibly hairy legs is honestly funny as fuck if you go outside in shorts people on the street look at you like Rowley

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Me to the baby: “You have two bits of state now! Quiet, crying, laughing, or squealing delightedly. Before you only had one bit. Your information entropy is going up! Do you know what entropy is? That’s ok, nobody else does either.”

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one of my favourite linguistic phenomena/in-jokes is spanish potato chips being “ham-flavored, probably”

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I recently had surgery, and at the time I came home, I had both my cat and one of my grandma's cats staying with me.

- Within hours of surgery, I wake up from a nap to my cat gently sniffing at my incisions with great alarm.

- I was not allowed to shower the first day after surgery, and the cats, seeing that The Large Cat is not observing its cleaning ritual, decided I must be gravely disabled and compensated by licking all the exposed skin on my arms, face, and legs.

- I currently have to sleep with a pillow over my abdomen because my cat insists on climbing on top of me and covering my incisions with her body while I sleep (which is very sweet but not exactly comfortable without the pillow). She also lays across me facing my bedroom door, presumably on guard for attackers who may try to harm me while I'm sleeping and injured.

That's love. 🐈‍⬛🐈❤️

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#I don't know how many more "He gets it" I have left in me

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I love that Jimmy Olsen is exactly the type of photographer Peter Parker pretends to be. Just bat-shit insane.

Whenever someone asks Peter how he took a picture he's like "Oh! I uh-, climmed a flagpole. Totally"

And very mortal, normal-human Jimmy is like "See, Clark, is not that weird"

I mean, look at this nutjob.

The world could be ending, lava on the streets and Jimmy would be out there photographing away. No powers, no sense of self preservation. Just khakis, a camera and a dream.

I like to imagine Peter meeting Jimmy and immediately being mortified about it.

Jimmy: –and so luckily I was able to take the picture before the building collapsed on me... Superman was super pissed at me but, photographer to photographer, it was totally worth it.

Peter: Right, no– See, this is actually my first time hearing how fucking insane that sounds. No wonder people at work look at me weird.

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show stealer!

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Superman desperately scanning the street during a fight to find the most morally acceptable car to throw at his opponent, knowing that not everybody has insurance, and loss of transportation can ruin a life -

A wave of incredible relief washes over him as he spots the hard geometric lines and silver paintless sheen of a Cybertruck.

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So wait are livestock guardian dogs to their flocks like… Clark Kent among the residents of Smallville? He’s been here since he was a baby, we all know him, and he’s… generally one-of-us shaped, uh, approximately. And then when something goes wrong he suddenly leaps into action and does some terrifying impossible shit none of us could do. And then comes back home and settles in like nothing happened and he’s one of us again.

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i realize there has been a startling lack of talking about the superman movie on my end. However the fact is i already loved Superman. and so i saw a superman movie and i liked it cuz it was superman. but i learned nothing about myself. or superman. i walked in there and i walked out of there no different at all. i quite enjoyed it. everybody else seems to be so so completely enamored with it because it was maybe new to them! but i already knew him. superman. i enjoyed the movie very much and im glad it wasn’t a crappy take on him. but it did not affect my opinion on superman as that opinion has already pretty much been sorted out. In that i really like superman

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see when people try and nitpick me because i call my dog "my dog" when it's technically "the family dog".......well first of all i still call my brother "my brother" and not "the family boy". although maybe that should change. second of all sorry i'm still thinking about the family boy. btw i fell asleep while making this post last night and i think you can tell

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Guys. Guys.

The new William the Conqueror BBC flick has PERIOD-ACCURATE TINY HORSES

NO STRUTTING ON FRIESIANS, WE GOT WAR PONIES BAYBEE

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tumblr discourse after 13 years on this fucking website

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