communist-pigeon-blog

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What about White diamond? Does she just have a desk she slams her face into to start the ship?

GUYS I JUST REALIZED SOMETHING

Keep reading

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Dnd

I’m the DM this campaign (5e) so I thought it would be fun to make custom items. Thus the “blue shield” was born. (If the user successfully blocked an attack, the dmg is converted to knock back)

Zeus himself: *goes to punch a krauft, our barbarian lizardfolk, intending to kill him and then bring him back to life*

Krauft: *predicts it and rolls 19 on blocking with “blue shield”*

Me:

Krauft:

Me:

Krauft:

Me:*pulls up calculator* time to do some fucking math

Tl;dr he literally got punched into the sun

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WHERE IS MY BIRB

I will send literally every person that reblogs this a badly drawn picture of a bird.

Gimme the birb

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Hey guys I need help, if bob Ross was a npc in a dnd game what would his stats be?

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*playing our first DnD game and are currently getting drunk*

Dorkis, our gnome bard: I roll to pass out drunk

nat 20

DM: you throw up on Calfis (our driver) and go into a coma.

(Still to this day the only nat 20 I have rolled)

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Sayori: depressed

me: in love

Sayori is forcibly removed from the character file.

Doki Doki literature club: installed

Poetry: read

I am forcibly removed from my current sanity

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Doki Doki literature club: installed

Poetry: read

I am forcibly removed from my current sanity

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Gimme the birb

I will send literally every person that reblogs this a badly drawn picture of a bird.

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jasper or Bismuth????

Unbubble her you cowards

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true art

Midnight Mystery: A Denny's Story

12:00 pm. It was a cold and windy night, which was quite unusual for Los Angeles, California. But then again, this wasn’t an average night. You could just feel it on your skin. Something wasn’t right, and you were going to get to the bottom of it.

You looked down at your hand, knuckles white from nervously gripping onto the crumpled paper note. You decided to read it again, just to be sure you were at the right place. “Denny’s. Devonshire Street. Midnight. Be there. Come alone.”

You sighed heavily, and looked up at the building in front of you, looming in the darkness. Yep, this was it. The inside was dark from what you can tell by looking through the windows. You slowly approached the steps leading up to the large, glass doors. As you walked up each step, you reconsidered this whole thing. What if it was some sort of trap? What if this was where you were going to die? But, the ominous interior of the so-called “restaurant” was beckoning you inside. It’s as if this was your destiny. Cold, unavoidable, and mysterious.

You finally made it to the top of the stairs, and you peered through the glass double-doors. The inside still looked as dark and empty as before. Your shaking hand made it to the door handles, and to your surprise, the door swung open quite easily. They were expecting you. You stepped inside, but still not a sound besides the shuffling of your feet. 

A light comes on. Just a single spotlight over one of the empty booths. As your eyes adjust to the sudden shock of light through the inky blackness, you notice a menu on the illuminated table. It was propped up against a napkin holder, opened to the first page. As you approach it with caution, you notice a golden key set on the table in front of the menu. You lean in to read the page, but realize that there weren’t any food items listed, except for one: pancakes. In every space where there should be a breakfast item, it was replaced with the word “pancakes”. Your stomach begins to rumble. You are hungry… hungry for answers.

Grabbing the menu and the mysterious key, you keep walking through the room, occasionally bumping into tables and chairs in the dark. You make a left turn somewhere and another light comes on. It’s a bit dimmer this time, so it’s not as bad on your eyes. It’s the light at the doorway of the kitchen. As you make your way towards it, you hear a sound behind you. Some sort of creaking noise, like you were being followed…

You whip your head around, but there was nothing there. Just the same empty tables and chairs. You must be imagining things now. Yeah… just imagining things. When you walk into the kitchen, all the lights come on simultaneously. At least, inside of the kitchen that is. There’s nothing abnormal about it. It’s just a regular old kitchen. Something about it seems oddly familiar though. You’d like to think it’s just a bit of déjà vu, but you’re sure you remember this location from before.

You start looking around for some sort of secret entrance or hidden door, but find nothing. You must have missed something… there’s got to be a clue. You look through pots and pans, bags of flour, loose floor tiles. Anything to reveal what to do next! Just then, out of the corner of your eye, you see a poster on the wall. That’s it! It’s what the menu was trying to say. The poster had a badly photoshopped stack of pancakes on it, so there has to be something important near it. You run towards it, and rip the poster from the wall to discover a metal safe built into the wall. It was pretty plain except for a keyhole, which obviously fit the key from before. You shove the shiny, golden key into it’s designated spot and turn it. Instead of the safe opening though, the entire wall split into a doorframe! The key must have activated the entrance, and it’s finally time to see what you’ve been waiting for.

When the door swung open, it revealed another dark room. You take a deep breath, and step inside. The second your foot passes the doorframe, a set of extremely bright lights come on, and your eyes are momentarily blinded once again. When they adjust, something beautiful is revealed. Something magical. Something one can only dream about.

Wait a minute. This can’t be real… this isn’t real at all! This is just a dream! It’s just a dream!

You woke up covered in sweat, tears running down your eyes and your pillow soaked. You were gasping for air, your breaths coming in short and fast. You glanced out the window from your bed, and noticed that it was morning. It was just a dream after all, but it was exactly what you needed. You’ve been waiting for some kind of vision, a sign, a dream. And now, you’ve got it. Before you lost the image in your mind, you raced to your desk and opened up your laptop, desperately waiting for it to start up. You plopped down into your rolling chair, and typed in your password. It was ‘pancakes’, of course. You pulled up one of those electronic sticky notes that hang around on your desktop, and began typing in the description of that magical image you saw in your dream. Yes… this is it! The inspiration you’ve been hoping for!

“A stack of pancakes, but the butter on top is larger and zoomed in, and it’s photoshopped to look like an ice cream scoop with a cherry on top and sprinkles. It’s a pancake sundae!”

You cease your furious typing, take a deep breath, and stretch out your arms. This is the kind of genius your Denny’s blog needed.

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lmao why would god care if two men (or women) kiss. why would she think its bad???

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so you know how there's thicc ? what about spiccy?

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hey guys im making french toast sticks in the oven. I’m gonna take a quick nap wake me up in 5 minutes so i can flip them over

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So my dad pronounces new Orleans like "new Orleens " and my mom pronounces it like "norlins " so ive learned i can piss them both off by pronouncing it "norleens "

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lmao why would god care if two men (or women) kiss. why would she think its bad???

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Im at a Mexican restaurant and I whispered to my friend “habenaro mi amigo” (im white as Fuck btw) and I think a waitress heard me so im gonna go die now.

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my dad is homophobic so I use that as my defense for watching the show

You know what bugs me?

Some fans usually don’t mention the whole “gems are genderless” thing until someone mentions Ruby & Sapphire’s relationship, Pearl’s love for Rose, etc.

Then they JUMP on it, and go “ohhhh they are genderless so they aren’t lesbian!!!!1!”

It just irks me a bit.