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anyway the actual point of fandom is to inspire each other. reading each other's fics and admiring each other's art and saying wow i love this and i feel something and i want to invoke this in other people, i want to write a sentence that feels like a meteor shower, i want to paint a kiss with such tenderness it makes you ache, i want to create something that someone else somewhere will see it and think oh, i need to do that too, right now. i am embracing being a corny cunt on main to say inspiring each other is one of the things humanity is best at and one of the things fandom is built for and i think that's beautiful

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I don't want to ask AI a question. I don't want AI to write my sentences for me, at all ever. I don't want AI search bars to be the default and I don't want them to be in such a way that I can't opt out. I don't want this kind of AI in my life and there is no such thing as AI art, there is only theft of art from human artists by AI scrapers. I don't want any of this, I hate it. Maybe in a world that isn't driven by tech bro capitalism we can see machines doing all the dangerous inane things so humans can be free to pursue life and creativity. But that's not what's happening right now and I hate it.

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Just saw a clip of Ooof tata in New Zealand and wow, if that's their music, they sound so good. Kudos to them for going out in public, taking a chance that they might be booed off stage, and presenting their music to a non-curated audience.

Also I saw that Rotimi just returned home after a month of promoting his upcoming album. Also to the general public.

Then there's Radio Company which doesn't do any of that. They perform in front of a curated audience, overcharging them to hear their mediocre songs.

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Ku Klux Dean

Jensen doesn't think too much about things. It goes against his self-image of not-a-nerd and that's fine. Not everyone has to be a deep thinker.

but to state with his whole chest that Soldier Boy would be Dean in the 60s and 50s makes me wonder if he understands either of these characters. Soldier Boy was fucking Stormfront at that time so for sure he was running around in a hood burning Krosses on black lawns. He killed MM's grandfather probably maybe around that time or just after.

And we're supposed to believe that Dean Winchester, who was set up as the Moral Compass of Team Free Will, would have been doing the same thing? I mean Sam and Dean are fairly apolitical but have they shown any hint of actual racism? And I don't mean Dean's yes, very problematic fetish for busty Asians, I mean actual bigotry. I saw no sign of that - lots of ignorance on Dean's part, but not bigotry.

So I have to wonder if Jensen Ackles is talking about Dean would be like that in the 50s...or maybe it's Jensen Ackles who would be like that in the 50s. After all, he said Soldier Boy isn't 'bad' per se, just a little misunderstood likkle baby who needs to be educated.

Ugh.

Fuck him.

ITS BLACK AND INDIGENOUS PEOPLE'S MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS MONTH! GIVE US A BREAK.

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I was just going back in time and I came across this post I wrote 2 days after prequelgate and wow, my theories really hold up.

Ramblings on Prequel Gate

I have decided to lean into the chaos. Just write my thoughts and then get back to my life.

So first of all, a small characterization of the principles involved. You have Jensen, Mr. Perfection; doesn't have to make an effort to master anything. He's a savant at his chosen craft. He shows up and shows out.

People admire him for that.

Also he has a really really pretty face and people like that are often not 'kind' so when he is, it's kind of a big deal.

We have Jared, who is extremely intelligent, personable and tall. Things don't come as easy to him, especially since he has to stand next to Jensen every day for fifteen years, but he works at it. He does the work and he makes it happen. He has time for people

People love him because he loves people.

So they trundle along for fifteen years, helming this TV show, sharing experiences. There's really no situation in which they are pitted against each other. It's always them against the world.

But then Jared wants to go home (it's obvious it was Jared who wanted to go home) and Supernatural is over and then, harsh reality sets in. Maybe Jensen always thought that Jared was popular because he was the SECOND half of Jensen and Jared; maybe he didn't like Jared going off to do his own thing and being successful at it - without him. Maybe he felt left behind. Maybe everything he thought he knew about them, hinged on his unstated superiority in every way.

But Jared has a show and it isn't just successful; it's a skyrocketing, wow, people really love this guy and this success is attributable to him and him alone type thing. Maybe the ground beneath his feet begins to shift a bit. What's going on? Jared is working, I'm up in the mountains preparing for a role and doing my album - why isn't that enough? Why do I feel discontented? I want to go back to the Winchesters.

Just to go back a bit. When Jensen was Bacchus, king of mardi gras, Jared wrote a tweet about 'this must be how Meghan Markle's friends felt when she sprung a prince on them' or something to that effect. Was Jensen already not telling Jared shit? Did Jared find out about Mardi Gras from instagram? we'll never know. I just thought it was really strange that Jared wasn't even invited along. Steve Carlson was. Did Jensen feel that Jared would take all the attention?

Same with the Indy 500 and going to Lawrence Kansas. Seems like a brothers type trip to me. Why go alone? Was he already feeling like Jared was stealing his thunder? And for a man not used to having to fight for anything let alone attention, was it too much to take?

So he and he alone decides not to tell Jared about this prequel. And the fallout happens. And now he's all like, "I'm excited about this and that's all" (although between you and me, sounds more like something Danneel would say.) because he doesn't know how to make an effort, to win hearts and minds, because he's never had to.

even if this is all just a game, Jared wins because he knows how to play. Jensen has just been benefiting from being by his side all this time. and that is the crux of the matter.

I won't go on to speculate about the potential abusiveness of such a relationship but it's giving me the grue.

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John Winchester with all his neglect and what not managed to have both his kids believe that he loved them. Even Sam with his anger and whatnot KNEW that his father loved him.

This is a gift.

Not all of us are lucky enough to have this even with less neglectful parents.

i'm not at all bothered about people disliking john because entirely valid tbh and someone else's opinion changes nothing for me. i just think the militant anti john brigade - that is, those that make up textually unsupported and entirely leftfield reasons to dislike him - are really missing out.

the thing is, we've got an absolute buffet of an interesting and irreparably fucked up character here. we could debate the absolute Horrors of john winchester and his a+ parenting for days on end literally from the two seconds of screentime he had. because he does suck! it's totally fair to say that canon john is selfish, neglectful and at best emotionally abusive. now i'm defo no apologist (see username) - but he's also the furthest thing from a cardboard shitty abusive dad. there is serious context for the things he does and the way he thinks.

john's life was hell man. his own dad, for all he knew, abandoned him. he went to war young and almost certainly came back with ptsd. these things alone don't exactly make life easy but then your wife burns to death on a ceiling and you're left a widower and a single dad to a baby and a pre schooler before you're even thirty? then discover that it couldn't even be a plain old housefire but no - there is actual Evil out there and you and your children are not safe and never will be?

the desire for revenge is understandable. the desire to do stupid and paradoxically dangerous things to protect your children are understandable. right, good or healthy? no. but understandable. and that's what makes a good sympathetic character.

basically i think a lot of negative readings of john exaggerate the badness of his intentions and ignore his humanity. it's also understandable that john is not a beacon of emotional regulation. it's also understandable that he cant always balance being emotionally and physically there for his kids with Fighting The Horrors. pour alcohol misuse onto this dumpster fire and you're not getting a perfect person, or a perfect parent. you're getting a broken human who was focused only on keeping his kids safe, alive, protected, and able to protect themselves. sure, he had tunnel vision about it. he did it very badly. he controlled sam as the youngest and parentified dean as the oldest. he made sam feel misunderstood and smothered. he made dean feel completely responsible for the welfare of his brother and dependent on john's praise and approval as his second in command.

john fucked his kids up IMMEASURABLY. he thought he was doing the right thing.

also - remember young john? remember how he's softly spoken and loves his cars and adores his girlfriend and respects his fucking elders and, to quote mary, "believes in happy endings"? remember the doting dad we see for like a minute in the pilot? is that not meant to show us that, had his life not taken the turn it did - he would likely have been an entirely different person? how is the tragedy of that not also completely DELICIOUS??

so why homophobic john? why john who beat dean senseless regularly? why john who gave no shits and wanted his boys to be miserable? why these embellishments that make him someone else, someone with nothing good inside of him, when what canon gives us is so much better?

come on guys. the tragic messy sad angry selfish HUMAN john we got in the show is an absolute treat. why are we making him an irredeemable, unfeeling and uncomplicated asshole who doesn't give a shit about his boys. ya'll saw him spending a good 50% of his screen time crying about how much he loved them right? and sam and dean KNEW he loved them. they also knew, or in dean's case came to realise, that he was a terrible father in many ways. real life is messy and nuanced. families are messy and nuanced. and imo spn got this so right.

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https://deadline.com/2024/09/jared-padalecki-cbs-studios-deal-fire-country-spinoff-1236079779/

Wow, a little surprised we have such public confirmation. Good for him though! Love that they didn't want to lose him.

The first press release nearly a month ago mentioned the spinoff and "Keeping Padalecki in the fold has been a priority for CBS Studios following the end of Walker”. The 2nd press released further confirmation that it's pretty much a done deal.

Besides leading two successful shows where the industry business model sees 98% failure rates for shows from script to airing (X),  Jared is credited for creating a working set with an enviable reputation of being a good place to work (X). This puts Jared in good stead with producers who tend to prioritize reliability. Hollywood is just as much about reputation as performance.

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Magnus's eyes

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Bringing Chris Evans back to the MCU but having him play JOHNNY STORM from the old Fantastic Four movie is fucking brilliant.

the best fucking joke ever made.

I was actually screaming when he yelled flame on, it just took me so off guard.

and thank god they let that man swear.

Deadpool and Wolverine really saved the MCU in my mind.

Finally some good fucking content.

Someone in the MCU with some fucking bite.

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it's the endlessness for me.

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been samming out lately

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thinking about how some of dean’s last words to his brother were “let me look at you. yeah, there he is.” like a revelation. two people who spent the first 18 and the last 15 years of their lives together, rarely farther apart than a few inches. seems like a crazy thing to say to someone whose face he knows better than his own. every single little quirk. and yet he says let me look at you like there’s a part of sam he’d never let himself fully see until that moment. like he has to reframe sam’s face in an entirely new context now that he knows it’s about to be over. i need to look at you without the baggage of years. without all the ways we’ve inflicted harm on each other casting shadow across every expression. let me look at you for all the times i couldn’t look. for all the times i was too much of a coward to meet your eyes. let me look at you as my brother. as love of my life. as the only one who ever. allow me this singular moment of flayed-open honesty before it all goes dark. and sam just stands there and lets himself be seen.