codybradfords

[codybradfords]

"Thank God, yes. You're a real live superhero, Hana Kim. You remember what I said about switching lanes, right?"

Nobody panic. I can drive.

[codybradfords]

"For dead? Really? I sprained my ankle; don't think it's terminal, for Christ's sake."

Oh what’s the fuss, everyone has nothing to worry about. I say if Bradford’s too weak to buck himself up, we leave him for dead, and I’ll drive to the next location. End of discussion, yeah?

[codybradfords]

“God, this is — this is a mess. Look, maybe this is just... how it's supposed to be, you know? Drop me off at the nearest hospital and I'll tell the cops the rest of you got away, send them on a goose chase to Canada or something. It'd buy you guys some time, at least..."

[codybradfords]

We are dumb and selfish. Ugh. Cody shook his head quickly, without thinking, realizing immediately those were exactly the labels he didn't want, and that hearing Imogene's affirmation would only make his uncertainty regarding their road trip worse. He was quick to laugh it off, fixing her with the sort of sheepish gaze that he hoped indicated how badly he regretted bringing this up. He didn't talk about his worries — ever. He was decisive; he wasn't nearly as lost as the boy they'd set out to find and he projected that aura of likeability at every opportunity and at all costs. If he had one thing going for him, it was the ease with which he made others (and by extension, himself) comfortable. This conversation had take a sharp and twisty turn into the realm of uncomfortable with Imogene's declaration of fuck the world, despite that any other day Cody would've deemed such comments normal. He grinned, eager to ease them back into jokey banter, the revelation that she'd ditch them in a heartbeat far more assuring than all the ones made previous. "Didn't you just say you're not interested in pretending?" He wrinkled his nose. "That's practically the entire job description of a movie star, Kelley; let's get that straight, first of all."

“What makes you think they’re wrong, though?” Imogene challenged, lifting her chin although it wasn’t Cody she was quite rebelling against. The constructs of their world had long been foreign to her, and she’d abandoned them all a long time ago. She didn’t care if they dealt with problems; everyone dealt with problems. She didn’t care what they thought of her, because they were probably right. “We are dumb and selfish,” Imogene said calmly, “but that’s not a bad thing, and it’s not our fault. If you want to put blame on someone, it’s probably theirs.” She shrugged to lighten her statement but it was still there, a soft reveal of Imogene’s thought process. “I’m seriously not interested in pretending to be someone I’m not,” she added, grabbing a fistful of sand and letting it fall slowly through her fingers. “I’m myself. Fuck the world if they don’t like it.” She couldn’t help but laugh at Cody’s banter, a small part of her appreciating the way he brought some humor back into their conversation. Good, she wasn’t sure how long she could actually talk about this without calling him a dumbass or something. “Fucking rude, the ocean is way more than a big puddle,” she teased, throwing some sand his way. “If we go to Hollywood, then I’m going to ditch all of you and become a movie star,” she joked confidently.

[codybradfords]

text  >>> shaylor swift

Shaye: rats -- foiled again

Shaye: oMG wtf who knew cody had a cruel side like fax machine babies.....that's L O W even for u

Shaye: but lucky for me ur one of those villains who gets so cocky he spills his entire evil agenda to me, so it looks im not having kids....not that i was planning on it anyways like a bunch of little screaming gremlins....no thx if rather lick the underside of fuckboy sanchez' arm

Shaye: ARE U INSINUATING THAT I KILLED JANES FIREFLIES?? CODY IM SURPRISED @ U

Shaye: believe it or not, it was not me, but....now, drumroll please

Shaye: jane doe

Shaye: with the help of her jar which happened to have absolutely ZERO holes poked at the top

Shaye: codes ive been staring at them for ten minutes if one moved id know. dead, finito, gone. they're in firefly heaven or whatever.

Shaye: shit hold on i got a plan......

Shaye: we could......catch new ones? possibly?

Cody: SHA Y E this is NOT funny I HAD TO MAKE SURE?? lets not forget how often you talk about building stuff out of my vocal cords I WOULDNT HAVE BEEN SURPRISED

Cody: ...oh my god, shaye.

Cody: stop

Cody: oh my god uhhhhh

Cody: well obviously the next course of action is to charge the jar with 1st degree manslaughter. jane is a child so she'll get off easy

Cody: we'll have to fly in all the other fireflies in AZ in hopes some will b able to identify the bodies

Cody: i feel hana would be pretty good at autopsies

Cody: we'll have to write a report

Cody: and keep it off the news but that wont be hard since we're already on the run

Cody: its gonna be a long and hard case but im with you okay??

Cody [2 mins later]: oh wait

Cody: yeah thats a pretty good idea

Cody: have you seen any fireflies??? it shouldnt be too hard?? where are you?? we can do it

[codybradfords]

"Exploring, mostly. Sometimes we find a dead bird or a basketball someone left behind. Boy, are you missing out or what?" He stifled a laugh, heading over to her and leaning against the van. "I mean, no point driving across the country if you're not making the most of it, right?"

“Fair point, but you can never be too careful.” The toes of her shoes were pressed against the surface of the ground, keeping her unmoving as ever. “Hey, I don’t mind — go run off and do whatever it is that you guys do. I can never really figure it out, to be honest.”

[codybradfords]

"True," Cody agreed reluctantly, unsure himself for a moment why breaking laws was such an issue — the law had never been particularly kind to them, after all, and he was pretty sure he had it better than most of the others, having never anything but St. Clair's and an unwanted status. He could, to some extent, understand wanting to defy authority as a result, but he'd decided a long time ago he'd rather be normal and right than a fighter for any significant cause. Pushing and shoving wasn't going to give him a family, or make him feel any better about not having one; it was all he could do, going with the flow. "I just don't think we should cause any more... problems for people who don't really deserve to have to deal with them?" The end of his sentence was upturned, uncertainty settling in fast even as he said it. "There are people looking for us already, who think we're dumb and selfish and I don't want them to think even worse." He sighed, though couldn't help but give a little smile at how quickly Imogene assured him he was nothing worth sticking around for. "I know," he said, rolling his eyes as he looked out to the ocean. "It's just a really big puddle, now that I've seen it. I'm kinda hoping Alfie's got a way to sneak us into Hollywood later," he joked, leaving out the most important thing he hoped Alfie would bring him to.

The lack of a response gave Imogene more assurance that he was, after all, like the rest. She felt an unfamiliar quick pang of disappointment but ignored it, turning her back to it as she smiled mirthlessly. “Yeah, that’s what I thought,” she said without mockery in her tone. She wasn’t sure why she wasn’t laughing, or why she wasn’t trying to have fun despite being with a bore like Cody, but for once, Imogene didn’t mind. She didn’t feel as restless for the next source of amusement, wasn’t turned on by the idea of another challenge to overcome. She just was. “What’s wrong with breaking laws? It’s not like we’re the poster model for model citizen or something anyways,” she quipped, laughing at the idea of her being a role model for anything. “It’s not you,” she protested, even as she smiled despite herself, “I’ve never seen the ocean before. Why the hell not?” She had to admit, though, that seeing the world wouldn’t be as fun if she weren’t with the other St. Clair’s runaways. 

[codybradfords]

Ansel Elgort for Teen Vogue [April Issue 2015]

[codybradfords]

EVERY TIME YOU GO → for cody bradford;  [L I S T E N]

WAKE ME UP; avicii (all this time i was finding myself / and i didn't know i was lost) EVERY TIME YOU GO; ellie goulding (tape me up, then break me up / ever so gently when i'm at my weakest) BLOOD RED BLOOD; voxtrot (build my love in the things i say / you've gotta lift your face to the breaking day) THE SILENCE; bastille (wrap me around your fingers / break the silence open wide) LAKEHOUSE; of monsters and men (a fox gains our trust / then breaks it as he walks away from us) SMILE LIKE YOU MEAN IT; the killers (save some face, you know you've only got one) ARE YOU OK?; stars (what are you running away to hide? / 'cause i wish i could tell you there was nothing but time) HOME BY NOW; bombay bicycle club (if you wanna try / you can come out and see me) WHILE YOU WAIT FOR THE OTHERS; grizzly bear (while you wait on the answers that i'll pretend to find / keeping up with emotions still occupies our time) FLESH AND BONE; the killers (you always had it but you never knew / so boots and saddles, get on your feet) TRY; dear and the headlights (straighten up my shoulders for my mother and mirrors / the overcompensation of a posture i'm dying to know) WAKE UP; arcade fire (something filled my heart with nothing) CAR RADIO; twenty one pilots (there is no distraction to mask what is real) TAKE ME HOME; perfume genius (all alone i wither and bruise / i run my mouth like a fool) I KNOW YOU CARE; ellie goulding (but there's trouble ahead, i can feel it / you are just saving yourself when you hide it)

[codybradfords]

"Challenge accepted. If I win, you have to, like, rig all the TVs in the mall to show footage of me giving motivational speeches during the Superbowl or something. Deal?"

“More like motivational books have been conditioned to be crappy and I’m just observant. Do it. I triple dog dare you.”

[codybradfords]

Cody raised an eyebrow at the question, unsure how to answer. Imogene was right — partly. He was trying to be normal and to keep it together, but it no longer took any amount of effort to play the part of someone who was, for the most part, together. There was no try. It all came naturally, now: smiling and nodding when people talked about parents and smiling and shaking his head when people asked about his, making everyone smile in hopes of recovering what was lost but unleashing a cruel misconception about himself instead. If Imogene really didn't care, then she was lucky, because he did. He cared far too much, and he felt strangely bitter, having to discuss such a thing with Imogene, who was either entirely fake or the least likely person to understand. He couldn't imagine an inbetween. "You'd manage," he agreed, following her gaze up to the sun before his eyes trailed back to her face curiously. "But you'd break a million more laws in the process." He wrinkled his nose. "Whatever, Kelley. You wouldn't be here if you really didn't want to be. There's just something about us that keeps you coming back every time," he teased, grinning.

“You’re just like everyone else. Right?” Imogene grabbed a handful of sand and began to let it slowly fall out from her fist, the grains bouncing off of her legs and back where she had grabbed them from. “You’re just trying to get your shit together and be normal and in control and shit like that.” It seemed to be all anyone ever tried to do, just keep it together. Imogene preferred it… hanging around. She liked everything to be free and out in the open, because then she had nothing to hold onto and nothing to hold her back. She could do whatever she wanted, and make life her own, make it her bitch. She suddenly wanted to laugh at that and she did, letting her back fall to the ground as she stared as long as she could into the sun until even she admitted defeat. Turning her head to the side and squinting up at Cody, she shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know,” she said honestly. “I’d manage, though. I’d have a fucking good time doing it, too.”

[codybradfords]

Cody never wasted any time getting out of the car, always in need of fresh air and newer surroundings. Not that the van wasn't fun, but its interiors had grown stale over the past several weeks, both literally and figuratively. He was pacing about nearby when he heard Leigh-Ann's voice, glancing up and flashing a grin. "Such shenanigans," he agreed, mostly teasing. "C'mon, Leigh. It's not like the van's gonna drive away on its own — nobody's ever loved it as much as we do."

Leigh-Ann sighed audibly, her legs swinging to and fro along the side of the van. As with all breaks, the door to the van was haphazardly tossed open and the group was scattered about, each person eager to stretch out and wander. She, of course, was always the one who stayed near the vehicle. “I kinda feel like the announcer before the ten o’clock news every time this happens —” Her voice transformed into that of a robotic spokesperson. “It’s ten P.M. — do you know where your children are?”

[codybradfords]

Cody rolled his eyes, honestly pretty desperate not to let Imogene get under his skin. She was playing at something, as usual, and it didn't matter what she wanted so long as he didn't give it to her. "You don't know me either," he promised, shaking his head and actually feeling kind of sorry about it. Maybe this was just how it was going to be — they'd live in parallel, St. Clair's having been their only common thread and this trip their last chance and developing any more. They'd never agreed on anything before, after all, and between the 'no, you's and 'no, I won't jump off the roof's they'd hardly ever confirmed any real suspicions about one another. She was right. He didn't know her, and the opposite was true, too. Nobody knew. He'd never told anybody anything before, not even Shaye, and Imogene was at the bottom of his list as far as trustworthy people he might tell his secrets went. She was too volatile, and too keen on proving that fact every second. He groaned at her spiel, gaze flitting back to her inquisitively. "Maybe." He couldn't deny that certain personalities kept their adventure from growing stale. "But what would you be doing without us, Imogene? Honestly. Don't say 'making good decisions' or I'm going to laugh. You need us, too."

“No, you don’t,” Imogene snapped, although the words came out only halfhearted in its irritation as she rolled her eyes and pretended not to smile. But pretending had never been a game she liked to play; she prided herself on being honest and confrontational and real. She didn’t hide her feelings, she didn’t put on a front. She was herself, and no one seemed to understand that she was the most honest one around, but whatever they liked to think was fine with her. As long as they didn’t get in her way so often. “But I think I know you, Cody baby,” she teased back, knowing it would get under his skin and caring just a little bit, but not enough to stop the automatic outpour of her immediate, impulsive thoughts. “You are boring, and I’m the one who’s going to turn this whole thing into an adventure. Without me, what would you guys be doing? Just sitting around talking about what you’re going to do when you see Alfie instead of doing something about the now?”

[codybradfords]

"Exactly! Anything is possible." Cody grinned, kind of lifting his chin at the promise of Louis's trust. "Considering who your options are, I'm probably the worthiest person around. Just trust me. Everything's gonna be fine." Not to mention even if nobody on the van was deseriving of trust at this point, there was no turning around, and he couldn't think of a single person outside of this vehicle who would truly understand their circumstances. His smile grew wider, despite the terrifying implications of it all. "Plus, whatever happens, you're still my ride or die, Whaley, no pun intended."

“Anything is possible, Bradford,” he replied, eyebrows high on his forehead. It was like some sort of movie scenario that they’d all make it out alive and find Alfie at the end. In reality, half of them would end up dead in a ditch and the other half in the Somalian slave trade or something. “You know, that’s not entirely impossible, sometimes I worry about what he might be capable of…” Louis scoffed, “Alright, Cody, I’m trusting you here, just so you know. I hope you’re worthy of it.” 

[codybradfords]

text  >>> shaylor swift

Shaye: life hack: we can just toss jameson in the grand canyon and that kills two birds with one stone

Shaye: but srsly cody don't even joke about dying ok bc if we end up on the news they are going to pull up that disgusting school photo of me in the eighth grade when the camera man said he'd snap on three but snapped on one bc that's the only picture those smhucks back in boregon have of me.

Shaye: i think i will bradshow name a time and place ive been waiting all my life for this

Shaye: damnit cody u were supposed to be like "yes shaye!!! ur so smart she's totally gonna believe u if u told her her bugs ran away!!!!" not like "oh no shaye ur doomed forever" like how the fuck do u think im gonna tell a tiny blonde thing her bugs are dead im a /bitch/ not the fucking grim reaper. if she gets told, u have to tell her.

Shaye: careful bradshaw ive got an evil chocolate river with ur name on it:)))))

Shaye: cody i cannot tell her her bugs are dead what don't u understand not even in utah yet and we'll be in salt lake city. come ooooon ur the resourceful one so u know -- RESOURCE.

Cody: ...you cant kill ALL of janes favourite things in 1 night. we have to keep devin alive to soften the blow of us telling her the bugs are dead ://

Cody: if we fight and you kill me and you make a comment about my forehead at my funeral, i and jane's dead fireflies will haunt you until the end of your days and all your children will have voices like fax machines

Cody: i did NOT say youre doomed forever, stop this!! how did those fireflies die anyway??? shaye......

Cody: i have the same initials as charlie bucket, i think im going to be okay

Cody: I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO

Cody: are you even sure theyre all dead?? like if theres 1 still moving just say only 1 of them was actually a bug in a the first place and the rest were funny looking rocks

[codybradfords]

text  >>> shaylor swift

Shaye: neither did we -- technically, we DROVE, but on the news the cops are still going to to say we ran

Shaye: .........the class mrs tennansnow taught??

Shaye: shit wait that's independent living

Shaye: & i don't get on other people's levels, cody, people get on mine catch up

Shaye [5 minutes]: but hypothetically if someone wanted to get on a whimsical fourteen year old girl's level and didn't have a best friend with literal /shit/ for brains what sort of thing would that best friend suggest?

Shaye: nothing illegal pls i don't look good in orange

Cody: thats completely different?? "hit and run" is a real term ppl actually use and is also prob the reason we're going to end up on the news, fuckin jameson. on the other hand nobody EVER says that fireflies "ran away". fight me

Cody: clearly you learned nothing from indie living either... what happened to solving problems, yknow, independently??

Cody: k

Cody [5 minutes]: i mean if theyre dead idk what you can do?? leigh brought a ton of stuff but i dont think shes got an ouija board or anything and the vans shady enough without any voodoo shit goin on. not down to summon firefly ghosts anyway haha

Cody: you look great in orange! youd make a beautiful oompa loompa im sure of it

Cody: we both brought black shirts maybe we should just break it to her and help jane hold a funeral

[codybradfords]

text  >>> shaylor swift

Shaye: hypothetically if jane trusted me with her dead fireflies that i told her i would look after and instead just emptied the jar and told her that they "ran away" how likely would she be to believe that and how shitty of a person would that make me

Shaye: .......hypothetically

Cody: fireflies don't RUN, shaye

Cody: doe's legit taken insects 101. get on her level and maaaaaaybe hypothetically youll get away with it

Cody: not condoning. just hypothesizing.