cmoniqueeeee

[cmoniqueeeee]

[cmoniqueeeee]

Picking at Scabs

I pick at this wound so it never heals. digging for answers, hoping if I dig deep enough - I’ll find that missing piece/something new will resurface. but how can it heal when I’m constantly picking at it? So I have to let go of my obsessive urge to know all the answers, make sense of it all, and let it be in order to heal. My mother always scolded me for picking a scabs.

[cmoniqueeeee]

[cmoniqueeeee]

[cmoniqueeeee]

moments that bring me joy…❤️✨

Brings me back to when I went to the Big Island to spend a semester at the University of Hilo and I took Hawaiian Ethnobotany and Zoology because I wanted to learn about Hawaii, this beautiful place I’ve only seen in movies, through the Hawaiian people. Long story short I remember going to the beach and seeing these smooth, pounded out holes all across the lava rock with salt left behind. My friend told me this is a way to collect salt - the tide comes in, salt water fills the holes, the sun evaporates the water and salt is left behind. Tada! 🪄I thought it was so beautiful and it’s always stuck with me.

This is from 2022 when I moved to Honolulu 🌈 and to this day, I’m in awe. (this hole was not intentional)

[cmoniqueeeee]

[cmoniqueeeee]

Lioness Devouring a Man, Phoenician Ivory Panel, c. 9th-8th century BCE. From the palace of Ashurnasirpal II, Nimrud, northern Mesopotamia, Iraq.

[cmoniqueeeee]

[cmoniqueeeee]

I need to write some letters…

[cmoniqueeeee]

I feel psychotic.

[cmoniqueeeee]

omg am I psychotic?! Lollll maybe a little… but like… who isn’t? what do you do in the shadows?

[cmoniqueeeee]

my delusions are just my intuitive hunches that have yet to reveal themselves…

[cmoniqueeeee]

I feel like I need to talk to some old people.

[cmoniqueeeee]

“You twisted the truth to suit your needs.” That’s a good one.

That’s lying by omission..