classicsonic

[classicsonic]

results of tumblr vs 4chan war

thousands of SJWs lost in Tumblrs army due to conflicts within the ranks about fanfiction censorship

thousands of Neo-Nazis lost in 4chans army due to being arrested in "real life", a higher plane that few can access and is rumored to maybe not be real

underground advanced trade system established to covertly deliver memes between parties with minimal contact, which facilitates the transfer of language. tumblr notably begins to publish content written in "Greentext", a dialect originating from 4chan

Tumblr splinters into hundreds upon hundreds of sub-factions, though the two most powerful are the Darkly Chics and the Bluey Adults. the factions are largely in opposition to eachother, but none of them agree to leave Tumblr

4chan splinters a more violent and intense clique, whom after many heated conflicts with 4chan's main userbase are run out of 4chan and seemingly disappear into the cold mist for years

the 4chan splinter clique becomes its own nation while nobody is looking, choosing to be called the Soyjacks (based on a popular style of abstractionist art that originated in 4chan but quickly spread elsewhere)

earlier in the war, Tumblr's governing body, known as "Staff" (possibly originating from the name for a type of halting rod used by level 25 and above wizards), issued a ban on all pornography, leading to many notable artists fleeing to a neighboring site known originally as Twitter. later in the war, Twitter would enter the infamous X Period, and users from Tumblr either rejoined or moved to the newly formed Bluesky

several large scale rifts between Tumblr Staff and the common people occur, causing widespread fear and doubt about the longevity of Tumblr. talks about Bluesky and its success begin circulating, though most remain skeptical

out of basically nowhere, the Soyjacks launch an attack on 4chan's entire main perimeter of operation, which turns out to have actually been very poorly guarded, and reinstate the board they were thrown out of before taking down 4chan. those who were able to escape in time reported the last words they heard being "CHICKEN JOCKEYYYY". this is said to have been a message from God

the Soyjacks, after bringing 4chan to its knees, reveal that spies have been collecting information from within 4chan in the time since their banishment, and several private logins of members of 4chans governing force (known as the "Janitors") are leaked, effectively spelling the end of the site as it once existed

result: tumblr wins by doing nothing

[classicsonic]

Had a dream where the black eyed peas were bonding over being stuck together during a severe weather / tornado warning like sitting on the floor holding each others pinkies smiling at each other going like “we’re the black eyed peas we can do anything”

[classicsonic]

let me change my words, show me where it hurts

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IBM ThinkPad S30 (2001)

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ferns and finns

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bunster...

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my names sweetie 3000 because the last 2999 sweeties were all destroyed

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The dark...er truth.

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when a mutual from one circle reblogs from a mutual in another. ?? when did you two meet

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Idk if y'all understand how much these guys mean to me

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im always quoting this tweet and am shocked and appalled that it has under 5k likes

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YOU CAN TAKE HIS COAT OFF ? EWWWW

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robot and monster funny moments 👍

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silly

[classicsonic]

I’ve had a tumblr for 4 years what the fuck am I doing with my life