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on identity
ojibwe / noah kahan / richard siken / unknown / elliott smith / oamisoa / cameron awkward-rich
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Cover illustration for Vladimir Nabokov’s Despair,1969(edit)
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something that’s really painful and isolating too is that because everyone was so hesitant and concerned about us, i feel like i can’t talk to anyone about it or tell anyone anything really. and that feels so lonely and also dangerous. but i know they’re all still watching like hawks and i can tell the people closest to me are starting to be wary and concerned and know something is going on. but i just keep blaming it on quitting cigarettes. i don’t think anyone is buying it. i feel very alone. and very untouched. i don’t think it’s supposed to be this way.
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i feel uncomfortably alone
because i feel very unknown
and the one who does know me
doesn’t care enough to show up for me
must this life always be so lonely?
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my desires are split in too many directions that i cannot bring together and i feel battered and torn and alone and i don’t really know who i am. i’m not sure i ever have.
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oh
Yeah now we've entered the back pain stage
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Madison Julius Cawein, “In The Wood”
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Margaret Atwood, The Blind Assassin
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January 15, 1926 Journals of Anais Nin 1923-1927 [volume 3]
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Alejandra Pizarnik, from 'Continuity', Extracting the Stone of Madness: Poems 1962-1972
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Virginia Woolf, from her novel titled "The Waves," originally published in 1931
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