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also these venting posts arent even about my ex but about a guy i spoke to for two days that made me feel like absolute shit 

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i want a full face transplant. ive gone through too much pain and abandonment with this face. what these eyes have seen and what the pain this mouth has expressed, i cant live with it. i just want an entirely new physical vessel. i feel like only then can i move on from all my past traumas that are stuck to it, reverberating around in it. to put it bluntly, if i was irresistibly good looking, i would be wanted, i would not be rejected, i would not be abandoned, i would have the love and intimacy that i seek. there are women out there with disgusting personalities that get all of this because of their appearance. don't fucking tell me that appearance doesnt mean anything when it gives you access to company and relationships. there is no fucking way that I'm somehow standoffish or too blunt or intimidating that it would negate my appearance. if i was truly good looking these personality traits would not matter, just like beautiful women being dumb or having no personalities doesnt matter. so my coping mechanism to try to cope with and prevent future pain is to improve my appearance. i hate it because i hate myself because the feedback i have gotten through relationships is that I'm disposable. if there was anything special about me, i wouldnt be disposable. 

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im lonelier than ever and i wanna dieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. my self esteem is so bad that i just want male attention and dick. but that’s so hard to find in the hot boy desert i live in. i just don't get how it’s so easy for so many women to have fun and sleep around and i get nothing. everyone says I'm hot (sure) but men ignore me, they don't come onto me, etc. i feel like ive been in a dark cave starved of affection and intimacy bc of my last relationship and I'm fucking desperate for anything now. but one thing i will not do is make a tinder, as my friend keeps suggesting lmfao 

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life update since i haven’t been on here for so long

i’m finishing my first semester of getting my bachelor’s and have gotten all high a’s

i’ve been doing volunteer work with a mental health community organization and at a cancer center

been making money transcribing so i can keep getting fillers

have kept up w fillers (lips, smile lines, recently did cheekbones for the first time but i want more in them and smile lines need to be refilled)

i feel just as ugly as ever and feel like my face is shapeless. i’m making money also for nose job and hairline lowering

i changed thyroid med about 2 months ago and my hair has been growing back tremendously i have new short hairs everywhere and my ponytail is thicker

my boyfriend of 7 years and i broke up in early june and i’ve been keeping myself busy and being productive as hell. i cried once and feel nothing when i think about it

i started seeing a therapist and i love her but have only been able to see her once bc my mom got sick and couldn’t take me and we have to arrange a payment plan

also besides being busy i've just felt more and more distant from RF, like i just lost all the passion i had. partly bc im busy and have other priorities and largely bc the community is embarrassing. but that's not really new

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bdd sucks and idk what to do not even rad feminism help

same

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Noah fence but y'all white people want to talk about colonialism like its ancient history but the current queen of England was literally already queen when my dad was a kid and Trinidad was an English colony and he was beaten in missionary school by his white teachers for speaking Hindi and refusing to convert to Christianity

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Happy National Aboriginal Day, Canada!

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Makes you wonder if the system benefits from portraying revolution/progress in a way that obfuscates how to ever achieve it 🤔 I think so

Thesis: the narrow focus on public performance over substantive action in certain activist circles has less to do with cynical schemes to game the system for progressive brownie points, and more to do with the fact that many folks basically think social activism is a form of ritual magic. Popular histories give us images of Great Men making speeches and leading marches and circulating petitions, and completely erase all the ground-level infrastructure that made all that stuff work; the end result is that a lot of folks seem honestly to believe that bringing about social change is a matter of performing the appropriate symbolic actions and waiting for reality to reconfigure itself accordingly.

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hairy vulva positivity is great but it all seems to be for women who have a perfect little triangle bush, what about women who don’t want to trim at all? women who’s hair grows down on the inside of their thighs? thick dark hair higher on the belly? hairy butt and asshole? that’s the positivity i want to see tbh 🤷

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“If autism isn’t caused by environmental factors and is natural why didn’t we ever see it in the past?”

We did, except it wasn’t called autism it was called “Little Jonathan is a r*tarded halfwit who bangs his head on things and can’t speak so we’re taking him into the middle of the cold dark forest and leaving him there to die.”

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Okay, so the article on evolutionary biology and feminism is available as a pdf just by searching the title “The Evolutionary Origins of Patriarchy.” It’s by Barbara Smuts. But in the article she presents six hypotheses for why patriarchy may be evolutionary/biology. I thought they were interesting so here they are:

1. Among ancestral hominids, female ability to resist male aggression was comprised by reduced social support from kin and female allies. She suggests we were similar to non-human primates social structures with female dispersal away from kin and weak female-female coalitions as common place. It’s unknown why we have this pattern of dispersal, but it makes sense that our relationships would be more strained among those we did not grow up with.

2. Over the course of human evolution, male-male alliances become increasingly well-developed. These alliances were often directed against females, and they increased male power over females. Apparently male-male alliances against females also happen in the animal kingdom and involve groups of males ganging up on fewer or solitary females. She argues that in species where males are larger than females, even with equal numbers males would be at an advantage. With effective male-male alliances established and violence against females occurring, male power over females is reinforced. As we say all the time, not all men need to be violent to keep women afraid or “in their place.”

3. Over the course of human evolution, and particularly since the advent of agriculture and animal husbandry, males gained control over resources that females need to survive and reproduce. This increased male ability to control and coerce females. She states that in all other primates, females sustain themselves and do not rely heavily on males for resources. So one aspect in which humans differ is the extent of food sharing, which could in turn be used against females as well and in the process strengthen the formation of male-male alliances. Agriculture, animal husbandry and settling exacerbate all of these issues and give males more incentive to secure control of females. Regardless of how hard women worked, they often lost control over the products of their labor. On smaller plots of land men were more easily able to control and monitor women. With more intensive resources being invested, men had more incentive to make sure offspring were their own. And with more resources at men’s disposal, they could make it more costly to resist male domination.

4. Over the course of evolution, male sociopolitical arrangements increased the variance in male wealth and power and perpetuated family differentials across generations. As a result of increasingly unequal relationships among men, women became increasingly vulnerable to the will and whims of the few most powerful men, and women’s control over their own sexuality was greatly reduced. There is a positive association between male-male power differentials and the extent to which women are controlled and dominated. Coercive strategies of reproduction become more viable as less powerful males do not interfere with more powerful males. As powerful men monopolize control over women, several things may happen. 1) A shortage of women at the bottom, which may lead to more coercion, 2) an inability of less powerful, less coercive males to provide females with material benefits due to the male-male hierarchy and 3) inability of females to freely choose mates due to male control over females.

5. In pursuing their material and reproductive interests, women often engage in behaviors that promote male resource control and male control over female sexuality. Thus, women as well as men contribute to the perpetuation of patriarchy. Due to male control, it is not always as beneficial for females to ally with each other over males. There are strong incentives to invest in males and particularly resource rich ones. Son preference and male-biased inheritance patterns are a part of this. It is often more beneficial for a family to have a son than a daughter and therefore, this cycle of male investment continues.

6. The evolution of the capacity for language allowed males to consolidate and increase their control over females because it enabled the creation and propagation of ideologies of male dominance/female subordinance and male supremacy/female inferiority. Once language evolved, male-male alliances, male control over resources, and male-male hierarchy likely all increased. She argues that men’s use of language to subordinate women is a natural extension of our pre-linguistic history, one that allowed for further elaboration of male control over females. Although language is unique to us, male motivation to control females is not. Patriarchy is therefore a product of reproductive strategies which in humans have undergone “unusually effective elaboration.”

I’d be really interested to hear everyone’s thoughts on it! There’s definitely some things she touches on that I hadn’t really thought of before.

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just a thought but like,,,,, can people stop idolizing justin trudeau pls? like i understand d*nald tr*mp is a literal pile of garbage but praising JT like he’s the best thing to ever happen to modern politics is just objectively..,,, not right. his stance on climate change is subpar at best, and he’s recently approved the kinder morgan pipeline , of which thousands of environmentalists and indigenous peoples disapprove

the pipeline will run right through the Tsleil-Waututh First Nation (namely the Burrard Inlet) ((and also amongst other traditional land)) and it only received approval of one third of the indigenous groups it consulted [xx]

in addition to that, this pipeline will increase oil tanker traffic seven fold in the Salish Sea, causing unprecedented health risks correlated with diluted bitumen [xx] [xx]

this is just one of the many political blunders JT has made that the world completely ignores. sure, the man has a gender-balanced, arguably diverse cabinet, but if you’re going to glorify him, please do your research. 

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Increasingly often, as affluent and middle-class families in the First World come to depend on migrants from poorer regions to provide childcare, homemaking, and sexual services, a global relationship arises that in some ways mirrors the traditional relationship between the sexes. The First World takes on the role like that of the old-fashioned male in the family—pampered, entitled, unable to cook, clean, or find his socks. Poor countries take on a role like that of the traditional woman within the family—patient, nurturing, and self-denying. A division of labor feminists critiqued when it was “local” has now, metaphorically speaking, gone global

Ehrenreich and Hochschild “Global Women” (via tigris-euphrates)

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What frightens me about the men I know is that I know men are so good at compartmentalizing and creating public and private selves. I don’t think there’s a single man I know, including gay men, including men I love, including men in my own family, who I don’t fear might secretly be doing some horrific shit on the internet. I’ve just read too many stories about women who were happily married for years before they found out their husbands’ abusive online habits.

I’ve often joked with my friends about how me using the internet in front of other people (like in a class) is “taking a walk on the wild side” because the might see my search history, but I just want to clarify: when I say that my search history is private and might be embarassing, I meant, “I look up geeky, uncool things like fanfiction and I spend too much time reading celebrity gossip blogs and looking at Pinterest shit,” not embarassing as in the male sense of “My search history would reveal that I send violent, abusive threats to women online and watch rape porn.” My private self is maybe less cool than my public self, but it isn’t so dramatically different that my ethics would be called into question if my search history were to be made public.

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In need of submissions!

So this blog has gained quite a lot of followers despite being pretty inactive as of late, so it’s more than obvious that there’s is both need and interest for a blog that collects stories from detransitioned and re-identified people.

I’m more than happy to keep this blog going, but for that to happen I’ll also need more submissions. You’re more than welcome to submit your story if you feel like the requirements fits. Anyone is welcome to submit regardless of sex, orientation or political alignment. There are guidelines (you’re not required to follow) that you can find a link to in the top bar of the blog (you can access it through tumblr desktop).

Please share this blog to anyone you might think will find it useful, and please reblog this post so it be able to reach out to more people and potential new detrans-identifiers.

Sorry for being inactive lately, I’m gonna try to be better at seeking out contributors! Thank you so much for all the positive feedback and support, I appreciate it. xx

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The development of rogue capitalism and its attendant ideologies of complete liberal individualism led to women’s bodies being placed on the market. Women’s body parts are sold in reproductive technology. Women’s whole bodies are sold in reproductive surrogacy and prostitution. A massive international sex industry in trafficking to prostitution, mail order brides, sex tourism, pornography is making profits out of women’s pain. All of these things are said to be about ‘choice’ because this ideology fetishises choice and tries to prevent recognition of the political and economic forces that are the foundation of this sale of women.

Sheila Jeffreys on choice (via lolliguncula-blog)