Rating M for Mature. Not pro, just struggling. pls be kind. 23. BIPOC. Striving to thrive.icon by sushicore!
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how am i this bad at fasting. i used to do this like it was nothing. what happened to me.
#tw ana diary#ed disorder#ed not ed sheeran#tw disordered eating#ana trigger#vent#ana+trigger#tw ed diet
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also besties i’m opening up my ED server again.
https://discord.gg/wPq9GfNH is the link. beware that this is an 18+ space. i would love new ana buddies because community is so important to me. an*rexia can be so isolating sometimes…
#ed disorder#tw ana diary#ed not ed sheeran#tw disordered eating#ana trigger#ana+trigger#tw ed diet#pro a4a
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i’ve decided to be happy now. happy skinny girl. no one can stop me.
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every time i feel as though the world wants me to kms i remind myself that everyone else suffers daily so it’s nothing personal.
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no more depression. it’s about mindset. half smiling, willing hands. faking it til you make it is a valid DBT skill. i am not my mistakes. i alone can decide if my life only consists of upwards progressions from here. we don’t need 100% perfection, just 85%. and if that’s not good enough, fuck ‘em.
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mentally ill people like me don’t fit into society. sometimes i wish they’d lock me up in an room and throw away the key this time. i’m ill adjusted. at this point i can’t even blame my trauma, it is me. i am what’s wrong.
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everything seems rather pointless. too pointless to even “off myself”. everything is just so meaningless. i can even justify living for the ones i love now either. even still, dying would be just as pointless.
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nothing hurts more than when you’re aiming for perfection and someone tells you that you are indeed slacking. that you are a failure. that you are indeed inferior.
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i will ⭐️rve myself all day, religiously count my calories, be very rigid in my restriction but i will NOT be drinking my coffee black. 300 out of the 500kcals i’ve allotted myself are from my coffee alone and i am NOT sorry.
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