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ppl on here like to slander picasso but mastering realism as a teen and then saying fuck that and then painting square shit? absolute power move
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You know when a fast angry song comes on that you know every word to and you’re in just the right mood that your eyes light up with the fire and angst of a thousand punk rockers and you just feel so alive
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Normal Horoscope:
Aries: It will be an exciting morning Aries! That powdered nun corpse you have in the basement will finally come in handy.
Taurus: Someone who has been in your life for a long time is going through a tough process right now. Give them the privacy they need to replace their endocrine system with clockwork.
Gemini: The more people brag about you, the physically larger you will become.
Cancer: That mystery thats been hanging over your head? Its not going away anytime soon. Or ever! It is literally never going away!
Leo: If you’re ever feeling directionless, check your inner compass. Now you have one direction: North.
Virgo: Everything you do carries your own signature mark. An easily traceable signature mark.
Libra: Careful who you inject your trust into.
Scorpio: Keep your wits about you when a wolf in a funny hat challenges you to a game of texas holdem for your soul.
Ophiuchus: The angry ghost of James Buchanan will send you an email today.
Sagittarius: Clarity is not created, it is thrust upon the furtive souls that never wished for any of this.
Capricorn: Well lookee what we go here, a full shipment of mannequins that look exactly like you except with minor errors in body part proportions. Whoda thunk?
Aquarius: Speak softly, carry a big stick, hide a gun inside the stick just in case the bastard is outside of sick range.
Pisces: You will break down into tears when you are minding your own business having a nice panic and are suddenly interrupted with an intense overwhelming calm.
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LIFE TIPS PT. I
if it takes less than two minutes, do it now
always carry a water bottle!! you’ll (obviously) drink more water but you’ll also save money on buying drinks when you’re out on hot days
if you notice something you like about someone, tell them. genuine compliments are way too few and far between.
when you meet someone, repeat their name back to them. it’ll help you remember it (bc i am the worst at zoning out and immediately forgetting someone’s name)
give yourself a time limit to get work done. you’ll do more up against a 30 minute timer than if you have all day to get something done
also: be specific with your goals. if you want it done by winter, say you’ll do it one november 15. it’s easy to let time slip by.
no one’s forcing your friends to hang out with you. they want to be around you. don’t try to convince yourself otherwise.
never under estimate the power of a hot meal if you’re feeling unmotivated. take a break and make a grilled cheese dude
always keep $20 in your car for emergences
have a binder/folder to keep all your financial/important documents together. even if you don’t organize them beyond that it’ll make them so much easier to find when you need them
don’t sleep w makeup on!! keep a travel size thing of makeup wipes by your bed for nights that you’re too exhausted to wash your face for real
if you’re studying/working and can’t focus, go outside and take a walk around the building. stare at the sky for a minute. it helps.
networking: when you meet someone, put some notes in with their contact. remembering their kids’ names will make you stand out
fold your clothes while they’re still warm + you won’t have to iron later
get that chair out of your room. we all know your dirty clothes are sitting in it more than you are.
instead, stick some hooks on your closet door for those sorta-clean, sorta-dirty clothes that you wanna wear again
keep a running list on your phone of songs you hear that you like, books you want to read, etc
write down all your friends birthdays!!
if you can’t sleep, try to imagine something in great detail. design your dream house. plan your wedding. whatever makes you happy + relaxed
get dressed as soon as you get up, even if you aren’t going anywhere. it’s hard to feel productive in sweat pants.
if you don’t ask, the answer is always no
thrift stores are super trendy lately, but they really are great for finding high-quality clothing for cheap.
don’t read the comments section. especially if it’s something you actually care about.
fresh veggies go bad fast, so if you can’t get to the store often have a couple frozen bags of your favs on hand!!
also, pasta is crazy cheap and easy to make into a meal. add some olive oil and those frozen veggies and bam, grown up meal in no time.
be intentional with your friendships. if you want to see someone again, set a date instead of the old “let’s get coffee sometime!” that never actually happens
libraries exist!! and theyre fantastic!!!
if you’re buying anything, always google “_______ coupons” while you’re in line. you can usually find one, esp at chains!!
if it’s not something you need, put it back and sleep on it. if you want it bad enough to go back and get it a day or two later, it’s (probably) worth the money.
also, think if you’ll enjoy it for the same amount of time if took to earn that money. doesn’t work with everything (food, experiences), but for things like clothes/technology/home goods, it can help you save some $$$
you don’t have to do something if it makes you unhappy. sure, there are times that you have to suck it up and power through, but 99% of the time you have to option to say no and get outta there.
be kind. seriously you hear it a lot but it is so important.
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financial goals: bathtub that’s deep enough for me to be 100% fully submerged; preferably one of those triangle corner ones. Also maybe being debt free but the tub comes first
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Written by Australian doctor Rachel Heap, aimed at anti-vaxxers explaining the risks of neglecting to vaccinate children
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𝐃𝐀𝐘 𝐎𝐅 𝐁𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐇 𝐌𝐄𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆
There are seven days of the week, & seven major planets of astrology. Each day corresponded to a planet/god-ess, & thus, each day is drenched in their power. The day of your birth can reveal powerful, interesting secrets about you & your own destiny. Which day were you born on?
𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐘
“Monday’s child is born with Grace”
Monday is the day of the moon, otherwise known as ‘moonday’. Artemis/Diana is your patroness goddess. The Lunar Forces bless the child born on monday with tremendous psychic abilities, a gift to understand others & the gift of empathy.
Monday children are very sensitive, yet, they get easily angry as they feel very frustrated with the emotions of others. Usually, they are gentle & soft spoken as the light of the moon sweetens them from the inside. Most monday children are said to suffer from insomnia as the moon watches them at night & cannot easily let her children fall asleep. Monday children have a natural ability for glamour/beauty spells, & they also have a very powerful healing magic. The key to unlock their power is water, as the ancient magic taught us that the moon rules over all waters.
𝐓𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐃𝐀𝐘
“Tuesday’s child is born with Valour”
Tuesday is the day of Mars, associated with Tyr’s the Norse War god & Mars/Ares. The passion of Mars blesses the children born on Tuesday with a fiery will & great enthusiasm! Tuesday children act spontaneously & love to alway take what they want. They are warriors, & this is either easily noticed or ignored. Their calling is to claim their power & become the brave children of mars, as the God of War intended.
Self righteousness is one of their characteristics as a child, but as they grow up, they will realise that more opinions are needed to be expressed & to see both sides. They are also prone to accidents, but considered very faithful & mighty. They have a natural ability for offensive spells, fighting evil & exorcisms. They are also very good at channeling enthusiasm & inspirations - hence, the key to unless unlocking their powers is enuthusiasm & inspiration.
𝐖𝐄𝐃𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐃𝐀𝐘
“Wednesday’s child is born with Agility”
Wednesday is the day of Mercury, associated with Odin the Norse god of Wisdom & Mercury/Hermes. The Wisdom & Agility of Mercury blesses the child born on wednesday with avery strong, practical & powerful mind. Curiosity is second nature to them & they have a natural talent for business & communication.
Their calling is to discover & learn more & more every day. Children born on wednesday are gifted with the ability to cope with different stimuli st the same time, giving them the ability to multi-task & make them great at almost any job. It it said that children born on wednesday are usually very happy with their lives. Wednesday children also have a natural ability in astral projection & telepathy, as their consciousness is extremely powerful & they know how to control it. The key to unlocking their magical powers is their curiosity.
𝐓𝐇𝐔𝐑𝐒𝐃𝐀𝐘
“Thursday’s child is born with Nobility”
Thursday is the day of Jupiter, associated with Thor the Norse God of Thunders & Jupiter/Zeus. The Royal nature of Zeus blesses these children with optimism & good luck. They have a strong sense of justice, which blesses them with respect from others & gives them a strong ability to know exactly what’s good for them - & chase that from a young age. They attract attention & opportunities - hence, doors open right infront of them.
These children are gifted with the ability to find their way to success - although, this may take time. They are often well behaved, yet, sincere which sometimes causes them problems. They have a natural ability for good luck spells & spells for any kind of success/or evolution. The key to unlocking & igniting their powers is optimism.
𝐅𝐑𝐈𝐃𝐀𝐘
“Friday’s child is born with Charms”
Friday is the day of Venus, associated with Freja the Norse Goddess of Love & Beauty & Venus/Aphrodite. The Great Enchantress of the Pantheon blesses these children with a natural ability to enchant almost anything once they accept their nature & realise how beautifying they are. They are extremely talented artistically & have an amazing ability to bring peace, harmony & beauty wherever they go.
It is said, that the shadow of children born on Friday can beautify anything that falls on to it. As they grow older, they tend to understand their powers more & begin to realise that beauty can be found in the most unusual/strange/amazing places. These children are kind hearted with the ability to soften people whose hearts are/have been broken. They have the natural ability for love, beauty & peace spells - & generally they know this. The key to unlock their powers, direct their charms & make their spells even stronger is satisfaction!
𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐃𝐀𝐘
“Saturday’s child is born with Power”
Saturday is associated with Saturn/Kronos. The God of Time blesses these children with extremely magical powers. Saturn is said to be the planet of the witches, thus, children born of this day are said to have very strong, sometimes ridiculously strong, abilities.
These children are hard workers, who are determined to go as far as they have to in order to find exactly what they’re looking for. They can endure match, & are very patient. They tend to be materialistic & often, this is a prison that their spirit desperately wants to try to escape. Once these children realise their divine nature, nothing will be able to stop them. These children are born with the ability to manifest anything they say - as long as they believe it. They have a natural ability to perceive evil influences & send them afar! The key to unlocking their power is honesty.
𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐘
“Sunday’s child is born with Light”
Sunday. The day of the sun, associated with Apollo, God of Sun & Light. These children are blessed with generosity, valour & honour. They are great at sports, talented in the arts & possess great magical powers.
These children are noble, but not humble & they are very generous, as long as it is appreciated. They are optimistic, feeling that life will soon smile at them. Generally, that hang with many people - who most likely admire them - but only have a few strong friends. They are sensual people, but somehow very hurt by love. They have good hearts & like to help anyone in need. They have a natural ability to cast any spell - as long as it requires a candle as the flame symbolises their divine nature & origin from the sun! They are inspired people who have their way with magic, & the key to unlocking their powers is faith.
☆ LUNA-THE-DIVINE
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I wanted to draw a comic about a fish mom in an office then realized i don’t know anything about offices or fishes
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The Devil’s Toy Box
by reddit user MrClarenceWorley
“The Devil’s Toy Box” is an urban legend that savvier horror fans will recognize as the inspiration for the infamous Lament Configuration from Clive Barker’s seminal Hellraiser series. Though in reality the titular “box” is not a toy at all but rather a small room where the floor, the ceiling, and the walls are each composed of one giant mirror.
Keep reading
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Normal Horoscope:
Aries: Armed only with your trombone and the funk in your heart you will hurtle yourself unto the breach to seek a lover taken too soon.
Taurus: You are the biggest girlfriend. All others shall quake beneath your herculean strength. You hold the vault of the sky and can drop it selectively on people you dont like.
Gemini: If someone asks as to why you are carrying around a pair of industrial bolt cutters take a moment to consider how much effort it would take for you to answer.
Cancer: Its reverse cremation time.
Leo: Seek the lighthouse before it seeks you. Wear dark clothing and move as quickly as possible.
Virgo: In case of emergency you can wield a computer mouse like a mace. It is effective against laptops used as shields.
Libra: Life has no victory condition. There are no losers in life. Having an orgasm on the moon is pretty impressive though.
Scorpio: I think you mean Dire-Good-Boy.
Ophiuchus: If you are going to die you might as well do it in rollerskates. Have fun until that last moment. Go out rollin’.
Sagittarius: The sauce is increasing the tide is rising hold your breath and prepare your gnocchi.
Capricorn: Curses can be caught in silk blankets and tossed back without going off.
Aquarius: Time will flow in reverse briefly today and you’ll think you’re high. It will be fine.
Pisces: Today an angel will descend from the sky to tell you to eat more raw grains.
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Medusa with the Head of Perseus, Luciano Garbati, 2008
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