captmatti
Hello
7K posts
Nothing is happening in my life so I'm on tumblr!
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captmatti · 6 months ago
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Fun family story: when my aunt was marrying her wife everyone was really excited but also dreading it because my aunt is known for her insanely long speeches so everyone knew her vows would be like 9 hours long so when it came time for her to say her vows she had a shit ton of cue cards in her hands and even her wife started groaning and my aunt took a deep inhale and then unravelled all the cue cards which were taped together and they all just read ‘HOT DAMN’ in giant letters and those were my aunts vows.
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captmatti · 7 months ago
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you all hate the position i sleep in because you haven’t advanced to my level and you’re jealous of my mental acuity and caustic wit as well as being extremely good at sleeping
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captmatti · 10 months ago
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This wins the internet for 2024!! 😂😂
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captmatti · 1 year ago
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Watched Deadloch.
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captmatti · 1 year ago
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If the USA is so great then why did they make a USB?
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captmatti · 1 year ago
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captmatti · 1 year ago
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captmatti · 1 year ago
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captmatti · 1 year ago
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captmatti · 1 year ago
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Reneé Rapp via TikTok, August 26th 2023
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captmatti · 1 year ago
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captmatti · 1 year ago
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captmatti · 1 year ago
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captmatti · 2 years ago
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captmatti · 2 years ago
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captmatti · 2 years ago
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downside: going to have to include a picture of the Giza pyramids in the slides for the lecture upside: i get to give people a crash course in why perspective matters in two frames, because
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followed by
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is such a funny sequence
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captmatti · 2 years ago
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