canyouhearmeow

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Coffin Texts, spell 714

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Sexiest Podcast Character 2024 — Scripted Bracket — Round 1

Propaganda

Michael Walters (WOE.BEGONE):

He's a cowboy he's a bear and he's in his 40s what else can I say

Emotionally stunted cowboy. Kills other versions of himself with no problem. You wouldn't think he's hot from that description but he is, trust me. He has perfect eyebrows

He‘s a rugged old cowboy, who would kill and sacrifice himself to save the people he cares about.

Mod Note: This is specifically about Michael Walters, who beat out Mike Walters in the preliminaries.

SPEAKER (SAYER):

Sure, it intentionally caused a global catastrophe, but the spine it hides behind its customer service façade? Hot as fuck.

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[WIP] i hauve several diseases

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aerolith borrows lumon's break room

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speaker is trying to take this fanmade sticker set down as we squeak

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this one is still killing me

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They are rizzing him up (and he is experiencing the freeze response 👍)

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girls night out but its Anna Cordero, Gretchen Funderbunk, Amanda Jones, Cassandra Morris, Dr. Grant and Corrine Vasquez having the worlds weirdest conversations ever

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if they had 20 year old classic shoujo manga merch money

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Finally made some designs for them.

Ok so design info:

SAYER:

Made to look less human, is probablly like 3 metres tall, it's intimiditing and very inhuman. I know a lot of people think of it as red but i always saw it as the greenish teal of the podcast cover (sayer is this deep teal, speaker is bright green, future is purple, ocean is dark blue, and the elevators ai is an orangish pink, that's how my brain sees them as colors at least, also makes sense for aoreliths branding to me to jeep to cooler tones that are more "sciency"). The spikes are suppose to symbolize the towers in a way, and be reminicent of angel wings since the ais are saraphins. The other inspirations are the human skeleton (thus the expose spine, and generally the more bome like structures) but it does have four digita in its fingers and more bird like feet (again angels). When listening to saye i always imagined it as a grey face so its grey (also to kinda show its age and to be more intimidating than speaker as its suppose to be a leader or the towers). They both dont have faces because 1they aren't human and a lack of face is uncanny and scary and i enjoy the idea and 2 they arent given the right to identity by their designers. Another inspiration is insects so the fragmented design and again the towers. The aeorolith logo is suppose to be very futuristic and minimalist so i made it the simplest in can be, i tried a design with an arrow motif but it just wasnt working (of course an evil corporation has a minimalist logo). I think Sayers movements are very inhuman, like it jerks its head a lot, so the long neck.

SPEAKER:

It shares a lot of similarities with sayer, but i wanted it to be wayyy more human since its role and personality are quite diffrent that sayers. Its more inspired by a manakin, and lacks a lot of the angel like qualities. Its also not a skeleton but more a full flesh vessel, with its wiring in its stomach resembling organs. Oh also the red and blue wires/highlights in both their designs are suppose to look like veins. It being a newer model is more sleek and white, but again somebof the wirse are lose and suppose to look a bit like vines and give the design some visual intrest. The low hanging wires are also to give an opposite silhouette to sayer, and its much smaller more normal human size. Also speakers pose specificlly is inspired by ballet dancers.

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Teacher

grainless + shadingless + bloodless versions

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it should be a violation of IA-3 for SAYER to say it “doesn’t hold grudges”

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He breasted boobily up fifteen flights of stairs, and titted into floor 13.

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he’s the worst man ever invented but of course, his breasts are sublime

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everytime Hale spoke on air in S4 (and probably the entirety of the podcast), okay?

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anna cordero's isekai harem of startlingly mid and ethically dubious men

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hi i wrote something

2.2k words, nanites!SAYER/Hale thing from SAYER's POV

summary:

Held within each other, him curling around you in every way, and you filling out the gaps so perfectly. Veins, arteries, every single turn, a familiar body, all mapped out. --- SAYER takes the form of a nanite swarm inside of Hale's body, once again.