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HDSzzZ on Twitter

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*the gang steps into baldur’s gate*

halsin: they’re making people pay for flowers?? for fruit?? things that silvanus gave to us for free?!

astarion: omg why are you yelling at me? i didnt make the system

astarion: wait

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listen. wyll canonly wants to have kids. astarion canonly fantasized about getting married. you can acquire a githyanki egg in game. do you understand what im saying here its time for the worst family you've ever seen

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"astarion is a traumatized abuse victim who deserves kindness" and "astarion is a mean rat bastard man who would rip out your throat for a corn chip if he felt like it" are two statements that can and should coexist

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there’s something so fucking funny about the fact that astarion’s questline is called “the pale elf”. like. just imagine the most exciting part of your life’s story is written down and it’s just called “white boy”. come on now

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Something I love about confronting Cazador is how he obviously never processes that Astarion has friends until it's too late.

Petras and Dalyria must have mentioned that Astarion wasn't alone when they met him, but when you read Cazador's journal? He's 100% fixated on Astarion. How Astarion stood in the sun, how Astarion was willing and able to disobey him. And when Astarion shows up, Cazador barely acknowledges the party at all - and sure, that's partly because this is Astarion's moment in the narrative, but Cazador doesn't so much as ask why these random strangers are there! They're not part of his plans, so they don't exist.

And then they immediately save his errant spawn from the ritual and start beating his ass.

Just. What must have been going through Cazador's head when that fight starting turning against him? 'Is that... the Blade of Frontiers? Why is a monster hunter - and is that a cleric? - helping a vampire spawn? An undead? Ah, but they must be treating it as a necessary evil to have a chance to slay me, of course - hold on, why is the cleric healing Astarion? Why does that wizard keep Counterspelling everything I'm casting at Astarion, why waste the spells when I'm not even targeting him? Did... did that druid just cast Daylight on Astarion's weapons? And that brute of a tiefling - that's not just disgust in her eye when she looks at me, it's fury - and she keeps putting herself in front of Astarion, why in the hells would she - she's running right at me- '

I hope that one of the last things Cazador ever knew was the choking realisation that Astarion didn't just come back strong, or free. Astarion came back loved.

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You can’t sit there and tell me this wasn’t exactly how the planning meetings for BG3 went.

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and the final part!

Part 1, Part 2

Stay tuned for the news about printed version :>

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this came to me in a dream

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Many have written about how Karlach throws Astarion, well… Don't worry, no Astarions were harmed! But I can't say the same about Gortash…

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washanapple on X

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I need more of Astarion being an absolute undead fucking weirdo. No more suave charming elf man NO this man forgets to breathe for prolonged periods of time and randomly gasps or croaks because he can't speak without air in his lungs. He lurks in dark corners with weird reflective eyes and doesn't move until you notice him. He's SUPER into the scent of his lover and buries his face in their neck or chest while taking in a BIG snorf. He gets very affectionate when he notices his partner is on their period or is bleeding from other causes. He doesn't make noise when approaching someone and often scares the shit out of them because he just silently shows up behind them. He's addicted to the warmth of his partner and rubs his body against them like a cat. He makes animalistic grunts and moans while he feeds. He forgets to blink and just stares at people with wide eyes while they talk. He stares at his lovers pulse point instead of looking in their eyes. He growls when displeased. Sometimes he smiles just a tad too wide. He watches his lover sleep and waits for them to wake up for them to find him just staring them down, unblinking. He's a fucking freak and I love him to bits I need more weirdo Astarion.

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Baldur's Gate fanartists will draw Astarion like a renaissance painting and Wyll like the cover of an adventure novel and Gale like a Leyendecker drawing and Karlach like the cover of a trashy romance novel (where she is the beefy hunk and her love interest is the swooning maiden) and Lae'zel like a knight in a manuscript and Shadowheart and Minthara like the cover of a lesbian pulp novel and Halsin coming out of a lake like the bear equivalent of the Birth of Venus and they're all so right

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"He's only being mean because you antagonize him"

(Ascendant vs Spawn)

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couldn’t get this out of my head

twt for 4k image:

https://x.com/skeptical_lynx/status/1780524884239503677?s=46&t=EuBiJuFrpmM7JiLiuDbaCA

the context:

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I spray him like the misbehaving cat he is

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Showed my mum Astarion.

She concludes that he is sexy cause he has the body language and looks of David bowie.

But he talks and acts like Tim curry.

These are the most sexy men in the world according to my mum. I can't unsee it now.

David Bowie and Tim Curry's lovechild is a sexy, sassy vampire. Sounds about right.