caeliharbinger - Tumblr blog

[caeliharbinger]

"Well, Hoyoverse is a Chinese company, obviously they're not going to make playable darker-skinned characters with actual dark skin instead of just a light tan-"

I WILL SHOVE Y'ALL FACE-FIRST INTO ARKNIGHTS AND DISLYTE UNTIL YOU STOP USING THE DOGSHIT "CHINESE COMPANY" EXCUSE.

Plus let's face it, the fact that they almost always reserve the darker skin tones for NPCs and enemies should be really bloody telling.

[caeliharbinger]

he's never found him more attractive

[caeliharbinger]

happy birthday, childe! this 2 hour playlist is my love letter to childe... who along with scara has captivated me like no other character before

scara's playlist (which i haven't finished the cover art for yet) was pretty easy for me to make, but childe's was difficult for me because at the time not much of my favorite music really felt like it fit. i listened to a lot of new music, got into some new albums and bands, and built this playlist slowly over months.

it's themed around his devotion to his family and his god, his duties as a soldier, his vicious and selfish impulses. his future --  will the story of ajax be a tragedy, as was his namesake? will ajax ever return home?

i hope this playlist is interesting for you all and evokes something of this complex and interesting character. building this playlist inspired many of my own art pieces about him. (i've never made playlists like this before HAHA they've really done a number on me huh)

if you have any of these songs in your playlist too, or if you enjoyed anything here, or if you have any songs you'd like to share, please do 🥳 i really love talking about music

[caeliharbinger]

the fucking what

inspired by the childe is jesus theory

[caeliharbinger]

hold that heart close... happy birthday, wanderer!!

[caeliharbinger]

I forgot I made this post until my friend reblogged it lmao???

Queuing April 19th 2023 I guess!!!!!

[caeliharbinger]

All Trans men are men, but not all Trans men aren’t women.

All Trans women are women, but not all Trans women aren’t men.

Gender can be far more complex and less binary for many folks 💗

[caeliharbinger]

@tiny-fandango-man

happy birthday king

love u

[caeliharbinger]

(january 24 2024) a little doodle of Aether hehe :33c

[caeliharbinger]

guy who has mistaken adrenaline for love and isn’t interested in correcting the mistake

[caeliharbinger]

hold that heart close... happy birthday, wanderer!!

[caeliharbinger]

guysi think i might have a crush on my boyfriend but DONT TELL HIM

[caeliharbinger]

❄️ winter wonderland ❄️

[caeliharbinger]

elaborating on childe and kaeyas one night stand that will haunt kaeya forever but will haunt diluc even more

thanks to my good friend @succubused​ who wrote like 95% of the script :) together we are unstoppable. transcript is under the cut

Keep reading

[caeliharbinger]

i drew childes entire immediate family/designed the ones that didnt have canon designs. for no real reason other than im writing about them in a fic and i got attached

[caeliharbinger]

Layla my beloved

[caeliharbinger]

I feel the need finally to bring up introjects in a way that’s going to be a hot take, because good god am I sick of having things that I have experienced physically be told to me by those who haven’t.

I respect whatever an introject remembers or identifies with from their source, and I’d like to say this straight off because this is important. I know of alters and parts for whom source is integral to their identity, specifically the way it relates to day to day trauma and how that intermingles.

That being said, please, as an introject who has had something happen or occur or has some sort of disability from source, do not try to tell me what it is like because I have already experienced it physically.

You got scars in whatever media you were sourced from? Lovely, but as someone who is forced to bear that burden of looking deformed when those scars can be visible every single day, do not try to tell me what that is like.

You have physical disabilities that were gained or you were born with in whatever media you introjected from? Perfect, but as someone who cannot function without my heart being assisted by pacemaker, do not tell me what it’s like to struggle as though I’ve not gone through it and as though I do not continue to bear that weight.

You as an introject are of a certain race in source and remember knowing about the food you consumed of that culture? Do not try to correct me, as someone of that culture, on what I identify with and hold.

You have memories of sexual assault from the media you were sourced from? Do not dare presume you can speak over those who have experienced that bodily.

Source memories, pseudo memories, exo memories, whatever you’d like to call them, are individual to your trauma and your struggle as someone with osdd or did. I understand that.

However, your source does not give you the right to talk over, to one up, or God forbid to “educate” those who have dealt with or experienced those issues on how to live with them.

I spoke to an introject today who had scars in their source and identifies with them as an alter. When I spoke up about my own, I was told that I needed to speak someplace where I would not upset others. Because my scars are not desirable or battle caused, I cannot discuss my own experiences.

This in essence is a lot of the issue I have with fictive heavy online systems on places like discord or even tumblr. These memories, these source associations, which I know are indicative of their own trauma in some way, somehow surpass the validity of someone who has actually experienced the struggle physically because it’s more presentable and more desirable.

It’s not all of them, but it’s enough of them that the fictive heavy/introject heavy syscord systems now have that reputation, and it makes interacting so frustrating.

I should not have to explain why claiming an experience you haven’t physically gone through as though you have because you’re an introject is bad. I shouldn’t have to explain that speaking over individuals who deal with these things physically is actively silencing minority groups.

Again let me note that I have full respect for introjects who identify with memories that did not happen to their body. The only thing I ask is that I’m not spoken over in favor of more desirable or digestible experiences that they claim are just as impactful as me living with the things I do.

I know systems who have these memories and respect others who have experienced them physically. For those of you who fall into this category, thank you. You know who you are.

For those of you who believe in things like alter race, separate disabilities being just as valid as experiencing them physically (to the point that you’re trying to educate bodily disabled people/systems)- please listen to those who are frustrated and angry. Please understand why trying to speak over and educate that group of people or any group of people as though you’ve gone through it physically is damaging.

I understand your memories reflect your trauma, likely indirectly for some of you, and I empathize with that.

Please take the time to be respectful to the voices of the groups that have been silenced and spoken over in favor of an introject’s take on something purely source related.

The people of color with osdd or did that have been speaking up about others claiming their races as alters have been laughed off or told that they’re overreacting. They are not. Keep fighting the good fight guys. You’re fantastic in every way. As someone who isn’t in that position, I want to uplift your voices and the things that need to be said. You’ve got my support all the way.

In the past I’ve let other systems try to explain why alter race exists and why their ‘alters of color’ are just as valid as actual people of color. I believed them.

An alter who has the memory or individual source created experience of being oppressed but has not been that way bodily cannot claim to struggle in the same way.

If you got this far reading, thanks. I’m glad I was able to share this with someone.

Be safe.

-🧠 🌲 🔭 🫀 (group effort for this post)