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Uzumaki

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武蔵, Musashi 

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when i say “unfollow me if you support trump” im not saying it ironically. no, seriously, if you support trump then i dont want your disgraceful ass to be in any way associated with my blog. get out.

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People worry about their fics being unoriginal whereas I read a good fic and I'm like "wow!! I hope I can find another fic exactly like this one to read"

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 Hey btw, another worldbuilding thing: You can, and actually should have weird and impractical cultural things. They’re not inherently unrealistic, for as long as you address the realistic consequences as well.

 Let’s say you’ve got a city where there’s tame white doves everywhere. They’re not pests, they’re regarded as sacred, holy protectors of the city, and the whole city cares for them and feeds them like they’re pets. They’re so tame because it’s a social taboo to hurt or scare one. Nice pretty doves :)

 Then someone points out that even if they’re not seen as pests, doesn’t having a completely unchecked feral pigeon population - that not only isn’t being culled, but actively fed and cared for - mean that there would be bird shit absolutely all over the place?

 A part of you wants to say no, because these are your nice, pretty doves. To explain that there’s a reason why they’re not shitting all over the place, maybe they’re super-intelligent and specifically bred and trained to not shit all over the place. The logistics of how, exactly, could anyone breed and train a flock of feral birds go unaddressed.

 An even worse solution would be to not have those birds, editing them out of the world. No, they spark joy, you can’t just toss them out!

 Now, consider: Yes, yes they would, but the city also has an extensive public sanitation service that’s occupied 90% of the time by cleaning bird shit off of everything. One of the most common last names in the area actually translates to “one who scrapes off dove shit”, and it’s a highly respected occupation. And thanks to the sheer necessity of constantly regularly cleaning everything, the city enjoys a much higher standard of cleanliness, and less public health issues caused by poor public sanitation.

 The doves do protect the city. By shitting fucking everywhere.

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You ever just wanna read a shit book to boost your own self esteem about your own writing?

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I didn't fucking know that authors can read your bookmark notes and I am over here

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Couldn’t find this listing again, but the seller was VERY indignant about “time wasters” not taking this dreadful moss-covered couch off his hands.

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ARE we done acting like drawing nsfw art makes you some kind of evil twisted depraved  sex pervert or are people still acting like theyre morally superior for distancing themselves as far as humanly possible from any expression of sexuality

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Flipping Guardian Trick-Shot

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Who doesn’t like cows and fluffy cows 

(Source)

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The shit I can come up with... anyways have a draft,

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Narrative Anchors: How to hold your readers’ attention, wherever you take them.

One of my old fiction professors, Tom, used to always grab coffee with us students whenever our story had been workshopped.

We’d meet at the downtown coffee shop, where we fought the flocks of students for a table, pulled out a couple wrinkled copies of the story, and discussed feedback over bland coffee.

It was during one of these discussions that Tom pointed out something I’d stumbled into doing well. (He’s very good at that.)

“I think this is great, Mike,” he said, tapping my story on the table. “From the opening line, the question is whether these two will sleep together, and that grounds us. If my attention ever wavers, I can always fall back on, ‘Oh, well have they slept together yet? No, not yet? Okay, cool. I still know where we are, then, and where we’re headed.’ That makes the story easy to follow.”

This wasn’t, admittedly, a major focus of our conversation. We moved on to discuss more important things (like the story’s key flaws), but somehow that comment stuck with me over the years.

And now, looking back, I realize it was the first time I started thinking about something I’d eventually call “narrative anchors.”

What’s a narrative anchor?

It’s something I made up. But trust me, it’s helpful.

In short, I consider narrative anchors to be the craft elements you include in a story to ground your reader. On the one hand, they can help you craft a story that rings with simple, crystal clarity, and on the other hand, they can empower you to challenge readers with fresh, creative storytelling, without ever losing them at sea.

I put narrative anchors into three categories:

Plot Anchors

Character Anchors

Style Anchors

Plot Anchors

Plot anchors are a clearly defined situation, goal, or destination for a story. Tom (above) pointed out a situational plot anchor in my story, but you’ll find plot anchors everywhere. For example, in Avatar: The Last Airbender, Aang needs to master the four elements and defeat Fire Lord Ozai. We know from the beginning that defeating Ozai is the end-goal, so we feel grounded at every stage of the story, knowing where we’re going.

Moby-Dick, by Herman Melville, is another great example. Ahab is hellbent on hunting down the White Whale, and we never lose sight of that goal, even as the narrative stretches across hundreds of pages.

That’s the point of a plot anchor: to give your reader a clear direction, so they always know where they’re going.

Character Anchors

These anchors are the clear motivations and arcs you give your characters. Disney does this well in their musicals, always using an “I want song” (more about those here) to clearly declare what their main characters want: Mulan wants to express her true self, Hercules wants to find where he belongs, and so on. The rest of the story then circles around that character’s pursuit of their “want.”

When readers have a strong understanding of your character’s motivation and journey, they have a much easier time following the story as a whole.

Style Anchors

Style anchors are my handy little catch-all for every other craft choice you make to bring clarity and simplicity to your work. Style anchors can include: short chapters or paragraphs; simple and accessible language; straightforward writing forms; clarity of description; engagement with the five senses; using a smaller cast of characters; sticking to a single POV; and so on.

Cool. So when (and how) do I use these narrative anchors?

Tip 1: Don’t start with anchors. Start with the story. Take your idea, begin developing the characters and plot, and start writing.

Tip 2: As you write and revise, start thinking about anchors. Ask yourself what kinds of anchors you already have in place, what others may be helpful to add, and whether or not you’re doing enough to ground your readers in the story.

Tip 3: Consider your audience. Readers of popular fiction will want to be reasonably grounded, so you should try to always use at least a few anchors. But if your audience likes super artsy, experimental fiction, you may be able to get away with fewer tethers.

Tip 4: That being said, don’t be afraid to challenge your readers, whoever they are. If you want to get creative, go for it. If you want to experiment with form, language, plot, character arcs, or whatever, PLEASE do!

Tip 5: But when you challenge readers one way, try to compensate by grounding them in other ways. For example, maybe your story lacks a clear plot anchor, but you include a character with a clear arc and motivation. Or maybe your story is incredibly challenging on a stylistic level, but you give readers a clear character motive and plot (this was my experience reading Moby-Dick).

Tip 6: If big anchors don’t fit, consider smaller ones. For example, if your story lacks a BIG plot anchor like defeating Fire Lord Ozai, maybe use smaller plot anchors to drive individual sections of the book. Or maybe instead of a BIG declaration of your character’s motive at the beginning, include little anchors for your narrator that act like breadcrumbs for their motives and development.

Tip 7: Mix and match anchors as necessary, because there is no magic formula.

Long story short?

Write the story you want to write — then use narrative anchors to keep your readers reading, wherever your story takes them.

Tom may not have said that all in so many words, but if I bought him a coffee, I bet he’d agree.

Good luck, everybody, and good writing!

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Everyone has stories worth telling. If you’re looking for writing advice or tips on crafting theme, meaning, and character-driven plots, check out the rest of my blog.

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Disclaimer: my hatred of geologists is purely theatrical, but if I did have to kill one for some reason, it would be very easy.

I’d brandish my obsidian knife at them and they’d be compelled to approach. “That’s very cool,” they’d say, confident in their superior strength and endurance from all the rocks they carry around at all times. They’d shower me with very interesting facts about obsidian and hover just out of range of the cutting edge, waiting for me to exhaust myself. “But as it is volcanic glass, it’s very fragile, you see, and isn’t well-suited for use as a weap—” and then I’d hit them with the wooden baseball bat in my other hand, which they would not have noticed because geologists can only see rocks and minerals.