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Please ladies please

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Things really are panning out so well for me. I’m so happy I trusted myself & my decisions.

Others do not have to understand your choices or decisions but having trust & faith in your own is crucial.

A reminder to listen to yourself. Don’t be influenced on what you could do, or should do by others who are not in your shoes.

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My latest literary treasures to add to my collection! The art lover in me fucks heavy with the design.

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Seen it firsthand

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Laura Makabresku

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Some people will not hear you regardless how much, how hard, how truthful, how loving, or how profound you speak. Wish them well and let them go.

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Letters to Nowhere: Cause You Don’t Listen

Dear Precious,

The choices we make in life are ours. The consequences from our actions their ours. I will never fathom looking outside myself to fault another person of choices/actions of my own. But you do. I will never fathom the anger you had towards me when I told you your baby daddy pushed up on me when I was 16. & again when I was 26. Do you really think I would do somethin like that? You knew this man was a piece of shit & yet you cut me off & enjoyed your pretend family but cut off your own. The same family that made sure your kids had clothes on their backs & food in their stomachs. The same family that helped pay your bills monthly cause you couldn’t keep a job due to your mouth & attitude. The same family that let you move back in when in return you couldn’t/wouldn’t get a job, keep a job let alone help out around the house. But had the nerve to be selfish. After we opened our doors to you! & you went back to that man every single time. What a slap in our face. Thinking this time she’s gonna be better. Thinking maybe Precious learnt her lesson this time. No. You never did & still haven’t.

How can mommy support you for years. & the min she can’t help you, you decide she’s not worth your time anymore. You use people. The minute someone can’t do for you or won’t you don’t see them as someone you want in your life. Imagine that. Using ppl. Cutting ppl off & we’re the only reason you haven’t drowned yet.

You hold so much pain & a lot of it is misplaced. You don’t want to listen. You’re so quick to anger. You lack accountability. You’re selfish. You blame ppl for the life you created for yourself. No one can ever tell Precious what she did wrong. All hell breaks loose if you don’t get your way. How childish. You’re 32 but you’re still the same lil girl you always have been.

It’s sad. Pathetic really. To have all these days, nights mins, secs go by & you are still the same person.

I used to be sad, frustrated that we couldn’t even get to the problem. Your idea of fixing the problem is cutting ppl off & isolating yourself. But guess what honey. Those problems are still gonna be there. You’re still gonna be triggered. Isolating yourself is not healing. ESPECIALLY if you refuse to even listen. What introspection are you doing when you never allow someone to give another pov? You will forever live in your hateful skewed world. & you choose that. The only control you have in your life is your children & you think keeping your kids away from the only family they know will make things better. No, you’re only hurting yourself & your kids. Once you cut off everyone who will you have to go to when you need help again?

Imagine blaming someone you got an eviction notice because they didn’t have $200 to help. When they’ve helped you every single month for the last 12yrs. Imagine. It makes no sense.

I’m not gonna hold in my heart my anger & frustration for you & our current relationship. If you cared you’d be a grown woman about it. It’s above me & im washing my hands of you. I’d say take care but idc if you do or not. you’ll receive the life you deserve.

We can’t move forward because you lack introspection. At this point the argument isn’t even with me. The battle is with yourself. Heal yourself. & then maybe we can talk. If you learn to listen.

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Incredibly

Having structure for yourself is important.

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Sometimes I post ass, sometimes I post trees. That's just how it is.

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so blessed to see another day and having another chance to be better than i was yesterday

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