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the heist is actually going to be the perfect goodbye.
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I’m sorry it took me so long to see you, Alina. But I see you now.
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Me, googling this information frantically: Okay now you guys have GOT to be fucking with me, there’s NO way he could’ve actually–
ADVAGDHSGFHHJGHHJ THIS MAN IS INSAAAAAANE
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Thank you for saving me. You did the same for me. And if we stayed together, I doubt it would be the last time.
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what are you? this is what i am. (insp.)
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It’s incredibly nice to hear the right words, at the right time, from the right person.
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Whenever they shot scenes with David and Patrick in bed together, they always set them up so that Patrick was “taller” than David.
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If this wasn’t during a global pandemic it would be funny
JOSH FIGHT BATTLE ROYALE 2021
In case you missed the stream - here s an early brief recap and some highlights of the Josh Fight Battle Royale 2021 aka Josh Swain Battle aka Josh vs Josh vs Josh vs Josh vs Josh...
yes it did, in fact, happen. i know, holy shit. the Fight took place on April 24th, 2021 A.D. at 12:00 PM local time at Air Park Green Area, 4500 NW 45th St, Lincoln, NE, 68524.
a lot of people came.
the plan was the following: first the Swainbowl to decide on who gets to keep the name of The Josh Swain, the one and only; then followed by the All Josh Fight to determine the Final Josh. the joshes and others were asked to bring pool noodles. Josh Swain's Josh Battle Royale was declared a non violent event aside from the upcoming bureaucratic horrors of legal name changes.
notable attendees:
(the og josh swain (as of yet) wearing a josh swain t-shirt; roman josh; joshua skywalker; my personal favourite: josh wick duel wielding a pair of drills with pool noodles attached; spiderman josh and spiderman josh jr.; an undisclosed number of ghillie suit joshes; cape josh; little josh; and many others)
+ genuine professional media coverage!! journalists from channel 8 and channel nebraska were present at the joshpit
cheerleaders, supportive bystanders and other josh-lovers:
the fights:
josh on josh violence part 1:
only one other josh swain attended. in a brutal 4-round game of rock-paper-scissors the og josh swain managed to defend his name and pride. Select_Name (formerly josh swain) was removed from the battlefield
josh on josh violence part 2:
hail the chaos!! hail the bloodshed!! several dozens of bloodthirsty joshes came together in the final battle for the title of Ultimate Josh. only one can win, only one can remain. every josh for himself.
the coronation:
so?? who is he?? the josh who truly earned his name??
happy unjoshening to every former josh and all hail the king of josh: The Little Josh. a few words of wisdom spoken after the coronation:
other notable additions:
the josh sewer aka the pit for the defeated:
Let it be known, by all men in the state on Nebraska and around the World, that on this field in the year of our Lord two thousand and twenty one, a gentleman named Josh Swain defended his birth name heroically againist inferior men who bore that same moniker and against too cowardly to attend the said battle. Below are those who bore witness to it.
the fundraiser:
the "Help pay legal fees for Josh Swain's to change their name" fund organized by the og josh swain has raised more than $8k as of now and will be accepting donations for the next five days (till april 30) in case you would like to contribute. all proceeds go to the Children's Hospital & Medical Center Foundation which provides medical care to children across the state of Nebraska.
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