booksiwroteasakid

[booksiwroteasakid]

My Mother’s Birthday

The cover is blank because the sticker fell off. It’s okay, though. That’s what title pages are for.

My mother’s birthday is April 29th, so it’s only appropriate that I post this book now. It’s a page-turner.

Teddyville Publishing represent!

What can I say? I was 7 years-old and he was the president of the United States at the time.

All still true. I actually haven’t planted flowers in awhile, but now that I have a new house with a nice, big yard, I’m looking forward to doing it again.

The text and the illustration don’t really go together. The illustration suggests that the day is already April 29th, which is my mom’s birthday. However, the text claims it is almost her birthday. What a blunder on my part.

Additionally, there appear to only be 6 days in each week on this calendar. It’s not perfect, but it’s definitely an improvement over the calendar in my previous book.

Even now, 28 years later, I still remember being incredibly proud of this picture and how pretty the present looks.

Unnecessary exposition that appears to happen after the fact. I would’ve wrapped the gift myself at home, and we saw the beautifully wrapped gift on the previous page. I would also like to note that my family did not have a misshapen green car, or even a green car in general.

Lovely illustration of me hiding my mother’s gift under my bed. Did this actually happen in real life? I’ll never tell.

I made the best cards.

You know, I think it’s my mentioning of even the littlest details that makes this book, and so many of my other books, so good.

Ah, a throwback to the my April Fool’s Day book.

I love this picture because my mom looks so happy.

I don’t recall us ever having a cake that huge, especially for a birthday. I’m also pretty sure that every cake we ever had had the letters contained on the actual cake.

I forgot to mention that my mother blows gray smoke out of her mouth. It’s a thing.

I’m surprised that I didn’t draw that beautiful present from the second page again on this page because of how proud I was of it. Perhaps I felt that I wouldn’t be able to draw something so lovely again. Instead, we have one substandard gift that appears to be on fire.

Apparently, the watch I got her is the kind that simply sits on one’s wrist, rather than going around it. I don’t know whether or not I actually got my mom a watch in 1990. I feel like the birthday presents I got her were more of the handmade variety.

That’s it. Except...

This made me smile. And I hope this book is still special to my mom 28 years later.

Thank you again, anonymous youth.

xoxo

[booksiwroteasakid]

April Fool’s Day

Because it’s April, I found it only fitting to begin this adventure with my April Fool’s Day book, appropriately titled “April Fool’s Day.”

All of the books I published in first grade had covers similar to this. I believe they were made from wallpaper. 

I don’t know why I’m credited as “Kimmy” on this book. It’s the only one where I’m credited that way. I don’t go by Kimmy and never have.

Anyway, every book starts with the same first few pages:

The title page

The “copyright” page

The dedication

(I don’t know who Mrs. Fuller is. I imagine she was a teacher?)

And finally, the “About the Author” page

That is all still true.

Now, let’s get down to business. April Fool’s Day. Hell yeah.

We can’t just start off right on April Fool’s Day. That would be too predictable. I needed to build anticipation.

Also note the amazing calendar details, such as the fact that most weeks only have four days, and the fact that 31 seems to have been added on as an afterthought.

More anticipation building.

I’m assuming this is me, sleeping, dreaming of cruel April Fool’s Day pranks to pull. Notice the stuffed animal that I appear to be holding while I sleep. I don’t know who that was. The only comfort-type object I remember sleeping with was my pink blankie, whom I still have and still love, despite the fact that I don’t sleep with her anymore. 

I also don’t believe I ever had puke-green curtains. I’m assuming some creative liberties were taken for this illustration. Moving on...

BAM! There is is. The most important April holiday. It is, in fact, so important that no other date even appears on this calendar. It may have been laziness on my part, or it may have been the fact that I needed to highlight JUST HOW GREAT April Fool’s Day is.

Being an adult and knowing how expensive glasses actually are, I realize now that this was a rather cruel prank to play. But I suppose it was better than actually breaking her glasses.

I can’t tell you what I did, though, either because the pranks were too terrible (I mean, look at how angry they are!) or because I couldn’t think of any pranks and wanted the readers to use their imaginations. 

Again, another calendar with only the 1st. It doesn’t even say that it’s April; you must assume, through context, that it is. Why I love the entire month of April is beyond me. My mother will say it’s because her birthday is in April (there’s a book for that, just you wait), but lbr, it’s because of April Fool’s Day.

Darn.

An excellent illustration of a screaming mouth. 

I honestly have no idea what this is about. Did he faint because I pulled some terrible prank? Did he faint because he’s so happy the day is over? Or is he upset about it? Or is it a medical thing? I don’t recall my brother having any fainting condition when we were younger, but the young mind is good at blocking out disturbing things, so who knows? I’ll have to ask.

I don’t know how being upset about something would necessitate jumping to the ceiling fan, but 7 year-old Kim must’ve had her reasons. I’m also curious as to whether that reddish-pink mark on my head is a headband or blood from a ceiling fan-related injury. 

Sidenote: When my brother was 9 or 10, he was at a friend’s house. His friend invited him to sit on the top bunk of the bed and when my brother climbed up, he got clipped in the head by the ceiling fan blade. His friend offered him a Band-Aid, but he ended up needing stitches. Moral of the story: beware of ceiling fans.

Looking back, I don’t recall having any special attachment to April Fool’s Day. I don’t remember any pranks I have pulled (unless you count this past year, when I hid pictures of Nicolas Cage all around the house for my fiance to find.) As a kid, though? I’m drawing a blank.

Yes, that’s the end. However, I understood the need for feedback at such a young age, so in all of my books, I left a few pages for comments. 

That was from my first grade teacher, AKA the head of Teddyville Publishing Company. You’ll see that she leaves many comments in my books, always with the teddy stamp.

Why, thank you, anonymous youth. Your comment is much appreciated.

I hope you enjoyed this first review of this excellent story. Please be careful around ceiling fans.

[booksiwroteasakid]

Intro

When I was a kid, I wanted to be, amongst other things, a “bookmaker.”

Luckily, my first grade class had a little something called “The Teddyville Publishing Co.” This allowed me write as many books as my 6-7 year-old heart desired! And I took advantage.

In fact, I wrote more books than anyone in the class. 

I recently came across these old books and felt I should share them. I also came across my first grade journal, featuring amazing entries such as this:

I decided that it’s finally time to share my writing talents with the world, so I created this Tumblr. I hope you enjoy my writing as much as I enjoyed writing it. My illustrations are also top notch.

xoxo