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Clueless (1995) dir. Amy Heckerling
#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 ‣ attitudinal . ❞#this except he knows exactly what hes talkign abt yet still presents the information in this manner . HDNXJDNDJNDJDNDJ
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the urge to argue is both immediate and inevitable for jace, but the warmth of the elder's subtle touch calms and soothes him — brings him down from the elevation of his disarray and confusion. still, he finds himself looking every which way. as though in search of something, be it danger or sanity just the same. but at last he finds the other's eyes; they are in a dark and serious haze — an exhausted and weary ask behind their color as he enforces his request. jace readies himself for a response. ❝ but —- ❞ in his defeat, he still cannot help but to comply. a small and quiet okay escapes him, and he soon makes his way back towards the bed. here he sits down in the spot where tony had once rested; it was as though taking his place could provide the same comfort as his presence. in his solitude, jace almost doesn't know what to do with himself — what to think when in attempt to keep his mind empty. he wants to be a blank slate again. he would like to become altogether empty. and he would like to make effortless space — so that tony could bury whatever he likes inside of him. and yet, jace remains a person; he carries a darkness of his own. it resides deep within, though he has a routine meant to cover it up. the needs of all others, he finds, often create a nice and solid seal. their problems make a rich, protective soil; the spread splayed on top of buried bones. but as things in their world begin to fray at the edges, the dirt begins to fall away. and all that is remaining are those skeletons, staring back at him. all of those who are dead — those who have died. those are the souls, who are truly empty. tony soon returns to clean up his mess. for jace, it proves a somewhat uncomfortable sight. he isn't well accustomed to allowing others to do; he almost always has to find a way to be involved. but the subtle understanding between the two evokes a silence — a surrender to tony's gentle assistance. so, he watches as the other collects the shattered fragments from the floor. it very well may be porcelain that he cleans, but jace likes to think that he is just as fragile at the moment. it's like watching the other pick him up : piece by pitiful piece. it is no secret between them that their prior agreement entailed the elder would allow him to be there. for him to see the broken. yet, with the roles reversed, it is only right that jace respects giving tony the room to do the same. his dark eyes follow each careful and meticulous movement, the way that he avoids further scarring. and even as he peeks at his wounds, jace can see the shame. though it is typically something he would work to quiet, he keeps the comfort to himself.
with all willingness, jeongmin scoots to the edge of the mattress, which dips only slightly beneath him with the shift. channelling a bit of strength, he manages to maintain his silence as his shirt and subsequently his bandages are removed. each bloody strip makes its way onto the hardwood floor, but jace's eyes remain trained on tony. be it his hands, adept and experienced for reasons he should like not to know, or his expression, serious and clearly well-intentioned with an underlying sense of concern. there is hardly a moment that his gaze manages to miss. much to his dismay, it feels very childlike, but jace cannot help but grimace as the balm is applied to his wounds — nor as he is patched completely back together. at the mention of keeping it sealed, he nods, hoping to soon heal. the expectation in himself has very little to do with the pain and much more to do with his distaste for being a burden. well, his pathetic self ought to count itself lucky, he thinks, that even these scars would soon fade from his skin : regardless if not from his long-lasting memory. the thought of his own freedom infuriates him, although silently. a mere few solemn seconds pass before his vicious thoughts are interrupted by tony, who seems to think aloud. i really thought i would lose you, jace… they are words that jeongmin can just barely make out — that he just hardly hears, whispered above the clock's steady rhythm, over the sweet morning chirp of the birds just outside. the wind blows against the window in a high whistle, and the younger sighs deeply. you're safe. you're safe here.
jace internalizes the words. despite the stinging pain, he for once places his own need for affection above all things, leaning steeply forward to capture tony in a gentle embrace. he holds him close, his chin resting on the strength of the other's shoulder as though it is the only place he is intended to be. he was safe, right ? truly safe … that must mean, to both of them, in every way. immense guilt weighs down on jeongmin, his head shaking in disbelief — in disappointment. perhaps, tony would not understand. better yet, he would find him absolutely crazy — most likely unreasonable. altogether paranoid. but as the salted tears slip from his eyes and trail the path of bruises on his skin, jace cannot help but fall, truly and deeply into the safe space being created. it is in all hope of no judgement, just understanding. listening. a hiccup breaks the silence. ❝ but if i'm safe, then that means that you're in danger… ❞ it sounds silly — a thought that jeongmin is more than privy to. the ridiculousness of the thought prompts him to swiftly remove himself from their shared embrace. the younger cannot help but put his face into his hands, hot and damp tears continuing to fall as he shakes his head in denial. the worry weighs heavily on his frame, folding him forward in front of tony's chair. ❝ every – single — time that i live, all of the others die — ❞ it's a self-assigned cross that he's carried for years, the fear and guilt gnawing at him alive, the self-loathing swallowing all of the love he has left inside. ❝ my friends, ❞ he recalls mid sniffle, seeing his friend hang there — feeling all together hopeless, ❝ my family, ❞ the second word is tearful. he somehow avoided being present — in the accident where the people closest to him had become nearly unrecognizable, a gruesome sight he was far too young to have seen. ❝ even saros. ❞ he had died, too. and all the while, jace had managed to escape the clutches of death's grip with mere antics and a bit of survival skill.
at last his head finally rises, his eyes dark and dead — the paleness of his skin lit by the sliver of sunlight in the room. he looks at tony, tired from crying. ❝ if i live, then you'll die. ❞ and what did that say about him ? the sick and selfish desire he still has — to hold the other close; to keep him as his own and never let him go ? jeongmin laughs through his own tears, sad and pitiful. ❝ you probably think i'm crazy. or pathetic. ❞ the word stands out to him. jace averts his gaze into nowhere, wishing that things could just be different. ❝ its being safe that scares me the most… ❞ a wistful whisper.
nocturne melts into dawn . it is the fluttering of eyelashes , the passing of a fragmented second by blinking that tony's lids fly open . the crashing sound of screeching porcelain , had slipped into his senses before his conscious had registered --- a shriek leaves his gaze to target the source of disturbance with an urgent immediacy . his posture remains in a state of undecided flight or fight --- stopped in his tracks momentarily --- by the sight of the younger . his pulse lowers -- and tensed shoulders loosen anew , still drunk from the remains of deep slumber . the taste of blood , accompanied by the frozen touch of late snowfall linger . dried and cracked --- he licks his lips . a shame , the spilled tea . he would have drowned himself in it , like a parched tree in midst of an endless desert . a hazy gaze lays itself over the scene , at the threshold of his guest room . all caution and danger ebbs away slowly , gradually --- with tony rising to his feet . jace's words are registered --- but the elder simply pads across the floor , avoiding the cracked shreds of porcelain . his hair falls into his wretched , pulsating eye --- palms extending , to engulf the other by his forearms , wrapping themselves around --- with a firm , grounding grip . jeongmin's face is pale . much paler , than tony and his damned memories were used to . who's fault had that been ? he wants to grimace --- but instead , his palms climb their way forward . brush over his , to take whatever he is holding and set it aside . words linger , change their shape in his mind --- but not enough to amount to something . never enough . " please . " , a quiet hum equal --- an exhausted , resignation conducts his tone . he hasn't let go of the other's hands just yet . their warmth threatens to seep into his bones --- pierce his skin and every passing second , feels like flying to close to a sun much too pale . in his hues does an unspoken plea simmer --- brows furrowed , " go back to bed . let me . " --- a moment longer , one eternity longer . . he lets go . he has to let go .
tony walks into the kitchen --- and for once , does the silence , he is met with feel less alike a suffocating coffin with decorated , spacious walls holding him in . the kettle starts bubbling again . snap out of it , fool . hasn't he tried to capture stardust , all his life ? a vapor , a mist with no name ? gliding through him and his grip , again and again . when he enters the room anew , it is to soak the tissues in his hands with the deep colour of spilled tea . still warm . if he pretended just enough . . could that not be enough , to replace a fraction of the sun's rays ? lithe fingers collect the scattered pieces of shattered cups . tony raises his gaze --- despite wanting to look away . captures jace , in the only way that did not feel selfish to him . the only way , he could live with . discarding the broken pieces and soaked tissues , he walks up close enough to sense jace's breath on him . hooking a finger cautiously into the collar of the shirt to pull the fabric down . " that needs changing . " , his eyes lower themselves and the elder bites it back . the shame snaking its way around his throat . it is the least he could do . so he gently nudges jace to sit , at the edge of the bed --- pulling a chair in front of him to sit .
it is funny . in his determination , his hands do not tremble . his face does not flush . instead , palms quietly guide , pull the fabric to make space --- stripping them off their shirt . and one by one , he unwraps the soaked , stained bandages until they pool besides jace , on the floor . how often , he has stitched himself together . pulled the fabric tight around himself with his teeth . digits dab a balm across the lines of open skin --- slowly closing itself already . " if you rip them open , they will scar . " , he mutters quietly before pressing the white cotton around it , balancing his body to lean closer . when his palms are empty , his back against the chair --- he feels the world gliding out of his hold again . a cold shiver , suppressed --- his countenance veiled in a frown , staring at his hands in disbelief . momentarily , motion entirely comes to an halt . " i really thought i would lose you , jace -- " , it is mere above a whisper --- an ominous , cursed sentence to leave his lips . tony swallows the lump in his throat . " -- thank you for the breakfast . " , spoken reluctantly --- guilt soaked . how could he face him ? glance raises , with his newly found courage , to defeat this demon named shame . " you're safe . you're safe here . " , spoken alike an oath --- a reminder of his duty .
#scrrface#tw suicide mention.#tw death mention#jace chai that little korean boy that be cryin.....ZERO OUT OF TEN.#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 ‣ interaction . ❞
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MARK: NCT DREAM MD, 2024
#happy balenchais ! (valentines)#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐕𝐈𝐒𝐔𝐀𝐋 ‣ appearance . ❞#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐕𝐈𝐒𝐔𝐀𝐋 ‣ aesthetic . ❞#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 ‣ attitudinal . ❞
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PAST LIVES (2023) dir. Celine Song
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despite his efforts he remains unheard. and thus, there is little left to do besides surrender himself to the chilling hold of his injuries. as he is carried out into the open cold of this newfound winter atmosphere, jace's cognizance fades into a snowy white haze. tony must not be so aware how the pain of his sorrows are shared. it is not only the memory of the distanced look upon his countenance, but the slight and unsteady jump of his chest. it is the route of the tear that every so often goes awry, the tears that do not roll but rather float and drip like snowflakes, finding their way to jace, where his nose is tucked tightly into the skin of the elder's chest. from the blurred corner of his vision he spots the bright red of his bleeding body tainting the purity of seoul's first snow. and to the whistling sound of the wind, he fades away from consciousness at last.
he awakes with a start. it takes but a few seconds to recognize his surroundings. it is a small but familiar thing, the sliver of the outside world provided by the gap in the guest room's grand curtains mostly blocking the window. jeongmin watches the outdoors for a while. the snow had come to a calm halt overnight, though enough had stuck — covering the ground in a thin and icy layer of the evening. a tiny rosefinch flitters down from a partially barren branch somewhere, landing safely in a gentle field of white. suddenly, he can see another speck of blood in the snow. the sight prompts him to roll over on the mattress unceremoniously. it is a hefty task — one that leaves him heaving; yesterday's ache has settled nicely into the depths of his bones and muscles, and he finds himself cursing at the ceiling. to his surprise is he met with a sleeping tony; he rests pitifully alone against the guest bed's headboard. he is so very far away, the way that he often is. at the very least, he is at rest : a steady rock not willing to be so easily disturbed. and as usual, jace hopes not to disturb him. thirty minutes of his earliest hour are spent gazing at tony. he counts each and every scar in sight on the other's visible skin, completing a round before starting all over again. by the end he memorizes the placement and sizes, speculating the severity of each mark. jace thinks briefly that he wants power. but only the kind that doesn't exist in the real world. jace wanted the power to take away hurt — to reverse time, control fate. yet he is reminded that such power belongs solely to deities and the darlings of fairytales.
in examining the other's exhaustion does something disturbing dawn on the younger. that before his arrival, tony had been rebuilding his life just fine. he was organizing cultural events at the very least — finding his own normalcy with nicely tailored suits and soft silk shirts. and then jeongmin had reintroduced himself; to engage with him must have been like opening pandora's box — opening the door to all chaos. dolefully watching tony lie there, he feels himself sink deeper and deeper into an abyss of guilt. it is a pain that surpasses the strength of his injuries. it curls in his stomach and crawls menacingly to his throat, where a lump forms in place. he was the reason that tony could never rest. he had disturbed his peace. though his survival is a coincidence, perhaps it would also prove itself a mistake. wistfully, jace hopes that in another life, things are much less cold for the two of them. in another life, they would likely do silly things : like spend extended periods of time at an exceptionally warm summer villa. certainly, they would spend their days mulling over old poems and compositions. and in their time apart tony would garden while jace found a ridiculous recipe for compote that he would force on him later that evening. the end of their days would always be unfathomably balmy, and pleasant. and they would watch each and every sunset side by side. but none of that is real. and jace yearns so deeply for a strength that can assist him with the reality of right now, the truth that they both inevitably face. yet he mutes it all for the sake of pushing forward.
after an hour, jace swings his feet over the opposite side of the bed. it hurts substantially. this is also when he finally recognizes his nudity, and although embarrassed he also takes note of the careful manner in which he has been cleaned and bandaged. standing and limping quietly across the room is three times as painful as sitting up had been. for once, his prayers are answered by the black sweats neatly folded in the top drawer of the dresser across the room. considering its been years, he is surprised, but thankful, the circumstances leaving little room to be flattered. jeongmin knows he shouldn't be doing this. the hobbling depletes the energy that his body hardly has — and this is made obvious by his slightly labored breath. in the bathroom he over examines his damage. boy do i look terrible, he thinks. the swelling on his face has decreased, though not significantly. and his blood seeps slightly through the gauze bandages covering the deep slits on his chest. he should expect to become acquainted with these scars forever. it is a struggle not to whimper while pulling the black t-shirt on, while bending to pull up the black joggers and the black socks. its an even more difficult journey to the kitchen. regardless, the younger stops by the large window in the living room, admiring the purity of the snow for a final time.
cooking proves to be difficult, although not because everything hurts. its difficult because there is absolutely nothing in the cupboards. and hardly anything in the refrigerator. determined in his servitude, jace settles on toast with jam and starts tea the way that tony likes it. he gets jam on his fingers and the scarlet stain reminds him of blood. and then the panic sets in — striking him and forcing him to scrub his hands raw in the kitchen sink for far too long. your pathetic self can count itself lucky today, jace. if this is what the other side entails, he is not so sure that he does consider himself lucky. the toast goes cold of course. and jeongmin ignores the pain all the way back to the guest room with his mind simultaneously blank and unsettled. but they should eat right ? they should eat. the toast somehow makes it, but he unfortunately drops the tea, the cups shattering loudly on the hardwood floor. the noise is so loud, conflicting with the ticking clock on the wall. jace pulls at the ends of his hair, unaware of how lost he's become, lacking control in his own typical autopilot. ❝ i have to clean this — ❞ he says aloud, as though that is the most pressing matter. your pathetic self can count itself lucky today, jace, he hears in his head again. what did it mean ? enervated, the younger continues pulling at the ends of his hair : like he's pulling at the seams — like he can rip himself open in two halves. and he keeps hearing those words, that he should be lucky to be spared, although he cannot possibly fathom why while watching the slow roll of liquid tea seep across the floor. and then he keeps seeing it, the blade inside his skin. ❝ sorry, ❞ he apologizes to absolutely no one, not having checked to see if the other was awake, ❝ i'm sorry — ❞ he should really clean this up. this mess that he's created, that is.
it is a phantom's touch , a mere breeze rivalling the blizzard unleashing itself outside this building . a whiplash of pain , infusing itself into the surface of the elder's torn face . jace coils himself up , heaves through laboured breaths --- painting a grotesque picture equalling the most somber nightmares of a past long buried --- or so he thought . it is a vivid canvas , bleeding its colours onto his hands , brushing his face --- a trail of crimson . shocking , in full bloom . fragile enough , to fall apart by his touch alone . jace's words fall on deaf ears , escape the grip of scattered attention . instead , the grimace upon features darkens --- in between the palm of the younger --- he threatens to sink into hopelessness . . . until adrenaline fuels veins , rips him through the shock of what lied before him . broad arms snake around jeongmin's bruised frame --- engulf him with sore , hardened muscle . hooking around the back of his knees and back , tony scoops the half conscious boy up with almost no struggle --- pressing them close into his frame . wordlessly , carrying their body --- cool and yet at the same time burning against his skin --- spreading a numbness through his body to match the frozen landscape that stretched before them outside .
the outskirts of a city , veiled in muted silence ---- a howling wind stills itself , as if having awaited the tragic male's return . tony's breath evaporates --- and hands secure their grip across jace's body anew . a fair distance --- with mountain ranges blurring themselves into the grey of wet paper --- or perhaps tear - stained , for the elder bites them back . burning their way through --- force of nature . hasn't he just been humbled ? cannot control the wind , you fool . you can only control yourself . the sun sinks with a distant farewell --- hidden beneath a cloudy , winter sky . he gets it really . on most of his younger days , all he had wanted was to hide his life away . throw out his name --- mutilate his appearance . become a stranger to the world --- and you won't be able to recognise yourself either . what is a worse punishment to give , than to lose your own self entirely ? sacrifice it for nothing ? had it not all been for nothing ? what is it --- if all , does not even amount to the safety of a single person , dear to his heart , to his life ? his gaze falls down onto the weakened body , pressed against him . weary , with his eyes closed . for a moment , tony believes a fragment of peace having returned . . . and snow sprinkles the pavement . . . makes the elder's head raise . has it already become this cold ? footsteps pick up his initial pace anew --- hurrying through the deafening quietude , swallowing all noise . for a moment , a silent prayer passes his thoughts --- could this snow be enough , to wash the sin off him ? just this once ? finally ?
calloused , bruised knuckles flexing under the muscles beneath his skin --- as tony cleans the younger's wounds , having tossed his torn clothes into a corner . he doesn't deserve jace's forgiveness . but what has blaming himself ever accumulated to ? he sniffs , attempting to shake the cold off his exhausted bones . jace , having safely been planted upon an unoccupied bed . it is only now --- with all the dirt gone --- that the elder's gaze examines the aftermath of what had happened . his arrival --- too late . slashed skin , in long straight lines --- clean . deep , where the skin lies thin --- and the elder's eyes widen by a mere slight . the realisation dawns on him , still seated on a chair next to the bed's edge ; this had been light torture --- never meant with the intention to kill or mark someone permanently . ten years of his life spent between guts , violence and weapons --- he reads the inflicted , torn flesh like words . and this --- read like a warning . mere luck . neither tony , nor destiny . just luck . chance . that's , what had saved jace's life . his insignificance feels like slap to his soiled face --- and the male slowly rises , to leave jace to rest .
the silence in the main hall , almost felt like a soothing presence to return to . in between dust covered tables and shelves . tony , out of all --- simply lowers himself to sit cross - legged on the wooden floorboards . right in front of the window walls , open palms resting on top of his bent knees . the moon stares back at him . upon the elder's countenance --- a frown , deep contemplation --- a bitter expression . a sudden force ignites his body --- and he raises with gentle determination , pads back across the dark hall , into the other's room . stood in the darkness --- jace's chest raises gently , merely visible in the darkness . his breathing slow , quiet . for a moment , the elder cannot break himself away from watching him . laced by hesitance , slow footsteps carry him to the other side of the large bed , before he glides to sit on it --- back against the cushioned backboard . static --- limbs stretched out , yet firmly pressed against each other . with a good portion of distance between him and the sleeping figure . it isn't until long , that he slips into a deep slumber himself , sinking against his own shoulder . into a dreamless night .
#scrrface#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 ‣ interaction . ❞#minnie dear maybe if you had just gone back to sleep ---#ERFIJKFDJIKDJKGKGFJKFJG#not sure how i feel abt this i had to jump in my narrative bag for this one but hey
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Michael Cunningham, The Hours
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MARK
#its official. blonde jace is now licensed! (im fr this time)#specifically this blonde tho with that other tone mix…idk hair colors yall.#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐕𝐈𝐒𝐔𝐀𝐋 ‣ aesthetic . ❞#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐕𝐈𝐒𝐔𝐀𝐋 ‣ appearance . ❞#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 ‣ attitudinal . ❞
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one might easily be convinced that lightning has struck the building, as minjun's apparent fury is equivalent to that of heaven and hell's combined — like a vociferous clap of thunder ordained by a god. it is now that jace's lips press together; now that he leans far back into his flimsy chair of torture in full preparation for his inevitable fate. it is now he can begin to truly fear for his life – take this ending seriously. though afraid, he has little light left within him to shine down on the concern, choosing instead to slump over unceremoniously. he makes an altogether executive decision to submit to his demise. with eyes closed does he vaguely listen to minjun's mumblings of disappointment in his overall performance. this isn't the first time he's been referred to as a bore, though jace believes it may likely be the last, deafening curiosity �� guiding him to wonder how long it'll be before this building catches fire. little time passes, and jace mistakes the cacophonous noise from the door's removal to be a sign he was right : he'd soon be blown to smithereens ! the well of his wit runs dry, a tired haze replacing the little caution he had conjured from within. his ears buzz ever so loudly with panic — with tiny worker bees spinning up honey combs full of fear. but tony's touch cuts through the noise quite sharply, unexpected yet and yet unmistakable.
jeongmin reacts very little as the other comes into his view. partially, because he can hardly see at all. one eye swollen almost completely shut, the other nearly closed from exhaustion : what he sees is a shadow of the man he loves drifting above him. surely i must be imagining things, he considers, hallucinating. but the hallucination continues unraveling the rope that had run his wrists raw, and a small part of him brightens with belief that he is in fact alive — that this was real. and the shadow moves closer; it envelops him in a deeply specific wave of affection that he selfishly hopes that only he himself can recognize so intimately. it is him.
the raven's awareness borders absence. it takes a few beats for him to find the rhythm of tony's sobs, the shadow of guilt and blame clasped to his shoulders. it is an immediate response to guard the other under his wing, regardless of how clipped. still, he finds himself ever troubled — he hadn't been expecting him. ❝ you got hurt… ❞ he mumbles, as though announcing the unknown, and all together unconcerned with the other's apologies. through an insistent tremor, his hand reaches the other's countenance : it is an effortlessly painted portrait of blood and shame. both of which a tender thumb caresses away. and though iron soaked, the fingerprint of his identity subsequently finds a home nestled in the soft hair near the edge of tony's ear, a secret thing that jace learned to love from far away, but took advantage of up close these days. the pleading etches a seemingly permanent frown onto his face, averse to the apologies. ❝ stop. stop it — ❞ a searing pain near his clavicle cuts him off. injuries do hurt after all, and pain is catching up as adrenaline quickly loses the race. ❝ it isn't your fault that i didn't listen. ❞ though the statement is made through cinched teeth, discomfort surpassing his sentiment, he conveys what is necessary. you shouldn't have come : it's what he wants to say. that he was right, that finding each other meant danger — it meant disaster. jace swallows his pain for the sake of conversation. ❝ you couldn't have known. ❞ he suggests, hoping to absolve the other of responsibility for his own decision, ❝ you did protect me, you're here — ❞ here, where they are, where they certainly cannot last long. ❝ we should g-go…. ❞ jeongmin is embarrassed to tremble mid-sentence, but his wounds and his memories hardly do him many favors. the strong front he's attempted to build for the other begins to shake, its foundation hardly sturdy enough for survival. ❝ please, i want to go. ❞
the earth beneath their feet shakes --- in tremors of an enraged , scorching --- a grotesque , shocking display of wrath --- that cracks open like porcelain . ugly , macabre --- crimson dotted , drowned silk glistening in the dim , harsh light above the devil's crown . it is a blazing storm of a planet's collapse --- violent , trembling in his own terror !
it freezes his system , captures an astonished countenance before erupting --- with twitching features , hues alike scorching solar flares to wipe out any proof of existence . it slips from its cocoon , gradually --- edges the confinement he himself cannot escape --- bound is his entity to suffer from such humiliating curse ! " insolent little --- " , an interruption snaps his head back and the male raises up to his full height , turning his attention to one of his men . whispers of urgency leave him to flip his tone into the realms of decency anew --- " your pathetic self can count itself lucky today , jace . i will leave you to succumb to your fate --- it has been rather a bore with you , i must admit . . . " , annoyance leaves shoulders to sink , back turned to jace , as the elder rubs a silken hankerchief over his stained face , --- departing in hurried , long strides alike the rest of his men --- within seconds , roaring engines in the distance are the sole farewell --- until a disturbed quietude echoes in these halls . it takes less than five minutes --- less than an étude to conclude --- before one of many steel doors is violently shaken out of its hinges , explosively launched into the vast emptiness of the hall .
heavy footsteps , fuelled by an adrenalized urgency --- a silhouette inking its contours sharply against the contrast of the decaying concrete --- midnight's deepest zenith , widened umber , bursting alike split wood --- consumed by the destruction of a wildfire's storm . a dishelved countenance , a bleeding cut aligning itself with his cheek --- merging into tissues of an old injury --- hues of purple blooming on the side of a face , drowning in the shock of what it laid its eyes on . the weight pulls him , tearing to beckon him --- sink him into the bottom of the sea , bury him once and for all --- and it takes all his fading strength in its final approaching wave to run to jace . shame , guilt alike latch onto him as trembling , wounded hands dig themselves into the tied knots , ripping them into nothing but threads as they pool on the ground . it punches the air out of his lungs --- shakes his breathing .
delayed , blurred vision --- as tony faces jace . bathed , in blood , sweat --- tears . low lidded , strands hanging over his eyes . the silence is unforgiving . an ache , that stretches into eternity , with neither beginning nor end . it's his heavy breaths that fill the gaps gradually until the elder collapses like a star in itself --- like a summer's monsoon --- it spills out of him in such tragic grandiosity ; his curtain call . in violent shakes , in quiet gasps --- the muted bounce of shattering porcelain .
his calloused palms , bloodied and ruined by the season's of his life . . . what gives him the right ? he inhales , loudly --- unsteady , trying to scramble his words with a desperation rarely to be perceived . " jeong - jeongmin -- " , his fingers dig into the flesh , through the fabric --- neither greedy nor forceful --- no , his soul is swaying against the tides --- his only hope remains in front of him --- the rock , he is holding on for dear life .
on his knees . . he holds his arms wrapped loosely around jace's waist , his head buried against their lap . " i am sorry - i am so - " , head raises , glancing up at their bruised state --- and tony winces at the sight , " i am sorry , i am so sorry jeongmin -- " , a strong frown locks his countenance as his gaze scans their face for any sight , any trace of a reaction . his tears have glazed their own way across his face , his scar wet from the trail left --- eyes stained by soft crimson . tony captures jace , holds onto him --- as if his life depended on it , as if he is begging forgiveness for not this mere singular mishap , but his entire life --- his existence . at the feet of all that he could never have been . " i did not want to drag you in . didn't wanted to force my own decision on you --- " , gaze lowers itself , jumps around with no fixed destination , as if chased , " i should have known . that i cannot escape . cannot fight this fate of mine . no matter what i do --- i cannot erase what i am . " , defeated --- he sinks on his heels . " should have protected you --- should have known better --- " , this man's voice grows quiet , thrums in a sphere of pain resembling the flutter of a butterfly's wing --- now , that he is re - united with the accumulation of all destruction caused by his hands . in the form of the most cruel punishment --- the worst sin . he couldn't turn a blind eye --- even if he had wanted to . in his shame , he declares his defeat . accepts it .
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juxtaposed too near are the velvet red and the harsh scarlet of both hair and blood; jace's breath catches high in his throat as the other crawls eerily nigh. the muscles of his shoulders are tense – straight with sharpness – yet his eyes remain trained on his captor's. although dead behind the gaze of his tears, jeongmin remains ever observant, examining the way the other's dramatized expressions of concern and dismay take up life, fill up the room. he wonders briefly how uncommon it must be, for the man ever to be declined : to be simply told no. most certainly, it could not be often. although not all together lost on the other's charisma does he remain utterly unimpressed, for what good does it do the scion of a snake to be charmed ? saros may be long gone as jace's preceptor, but the other's voice remains — his mind's personal pundit on the underbelly of their world. and as he was the charmer back then, it maintained the utmost important that he endure the feeling of indifference. how horribly he has done at that recently. a taut string pulls at the very pit of his gut. minjun's bold taste of tears catches him entirely off guard, nose scrunching, head turning. somehow, the two end up nose to nose again. brutalized, jace's tired mind can only dance with all of the other's impressions, deeming them untrue, almost desperately assured. hatred that his body is too weak to show burns inside at the implications : that he isn't loved, at least not enough. tony loves me, he wants to argue, but in his feeble silence meets the realization that these were words he's assigned himself, not words that have ever met his ears. the mere thought fans the flames. what if he doesn't ? perhaps, he doesn't care at all. by chance, jace is just a play thing. or worse — a nuisance. turned into a tool, how he remembers the story. the speculation makes him swallow dryly, a sharp lump of anger swallowed despite his cold and departed stare.
jeongmin hates minjun. he hates him for acknowledging silent truths aloud. he hates the way that he sells his words. hates the way the elder's gaze twinkles at his pain as though observing the finest of art. the way his reverent and desperate admiration clung to his bruised and bloodied skin. its also the other's eagerness, his absolute insistence upon his worth, his appeal. if tony's mind supposedly proves fickle, then minjun's must be unmistakably and palpably made up. jace's sorest heart spot, cajoled just right by the situation. his stomach churns with the tides of hatred and frustration : but his lips poorly claim ownership of soft skin just as he turns his head. their noses brush, a bit of jace's blood smearing on the other's cheek. unbeknownst to by chance the both of them, the synchronized breaths did no service in preventing the kiss that is to follow. jeongmin's mouth is just slightly ajar despite himself, which he corrects quickly, drowning somewhere between an eagerness to be liked and to be rescued. the immediate result is a crimson smear, a desperate painting of their bloody aftermath. and yet as it ends does the younger find : it doesn't compare. for all its seemingly effortless intensity, this is a fact that angers jeongmin even further. nose to nose, eye to eye, at last he manages a huff of words between bated breaths : the ghost of a whisper against parted lips. ❝ i've never seen him run from a fight. ❞
carven grin stretches --- flashing ivory , widened eyes --- in their unholy quietude , do merely pants and sobs bounce off the stained , chipped walls . the elder drinks it in , savours each drop --- before he invites himself closer , bending his lower body . distorted countenance , a bruised , dried ruined painting --- a brush coated in the depths of vermillion , rusted . in their final desperation , eye to eye with a doomed fate , their demise --- a dying star's final rays pulsating in these veins --- oh , it elevates his pulse --- sharpens the glimmer , crystalline alike an emerging diamond . hand captures their chin --- examining their pained expression before lowering , tilting their red mane , to stretch their own tongue across their face from the bottom to the top of a wet streak of tears left . jace's trembling voice leaves the elder to hum , alike strings to vibrate against own bones . " what i want ? oh how generous of you to ask ! jacey ! darling ! " , he sings after pulling his head away . the devil digs the tip of his dagger into the pads of his digits , spins it lightly without puncturing his skin , " what i want --- is what you want . " , he snaps the knife against his open palm , stretching his gaze across their frame with a delicate pace .
crouching , body brushing against their knees , concern echoes on features . " tony will drop you . like he always has . the one thing that man is scandalously marvelous at -- is dropping it all and running the opposite direction . " , the elder shakes his head in an act of convincing disapproval , " what makes you think you will be treated different ? jace , you will break my heart ! look at you . . . " , a sigh , a huff --- an empathetic exhale --- a frown carving itself into his forehead . minjun straightens his back , clasps his hand between own dagger as if in prayer --- " don't you think you are deserving of proper appreciation ? " , he'd slaughter heaven --- butcher it down to the last creature --- craft a testament of his most sincere apologies while crowning himself . flat palm settles itself snugly on jace's thigh --- own body almost closing the disregarded void of personal space , arching to align himself on eye level . " depraving yourself of all you could have . for a man who can't make up his mind about you . " , voice has quieted itself down , lowered its register into the abyss --- own lips brushing against the younger's , glance darting over their eyes , " wanna taste something sweet for once ? " , brows raise , own chin lightly tilting up . enough with all this nonsense ! empty words , all loyalty in vain --- unrequited , doomed and cursed twice - three times over ! it borders disturbance in a system possessed by hedonism's spirit , ruled by it . " all this misery is gonn' ruin my appetite . can't stand it . " , he purrs -- merely mutters his outspoken thoughts , buzzing with uncertainty , an answer yet to be bestowed upon him !
#scrrface#torture tw#is that even what this is anymore......#tw torture#tw blood#blood tw#anyways... RAISE YOUR YAAAAYAYA.#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 ‣ interaction . ❞#do you think jace is ok and normal be honest
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jace's shoulders jump — his reaction most evident of the startle of a fright, though he plays this off smoothly as the girl's voice settles into recognition. wednesday. although opposite to each other in many ways, jace does hold the deluded belief that they could make an excellent team in solving the mystery. and excellent friends. it is in his nature to force his presence upon others ( see : his attendance to never more in the first place ) but at least a common goal might make sense of the crossing of their paths. curious eyes can not help but flit towards the folder momentarily before finding contact with the other once more. he subsequently nods affirmingly, determined to engage. a finger presses his reading glasses up the bridge of his nose before he conjures his response. ❝ deal. ❞ the hesitance is warranted. ❝ i just want to say, i want to find the culprit just as bad as you do. ❞ although apprehensively, he pushes a file of his own on the table in immediate direction of wednesday. sure, jace was lucky enough to call himself a nightshade now, but the circumstances of the society weren't lost on him. he was a normie. his membership and relationship to this world is antithetical. but outcasts are his friends. and those that he cared for were dropping like flies. ❝ it's not much, but it's everything i've found since… ❞ since the last death…
✧ 𓂅 closed for @bluestboy .
as wednesday stood in the door of the nightshade library , she thought of one simple common phrase : beggars can't be choosers . “ i have a lead . ” she offered as a greeting . her dark boots clomped on the cracked marble as she approached the table he sat in ; the manilla folder she entered with held tightly against her chest as she took her seat beside him . as much as wednesday preferred to work alone , this wasn't a foreign mystery . nightshade members were being killed one by one , and whether or not she was confused on the how , jace was a nightshade . “ before i share this with you you have to promise it doesn't leave this room . you only share it with other nightshades and only if you have your facts together . deal ? ”
#ghoclish#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 ‣ interaction . ❞#i am SO sorry this took so long my writer brain was deadass not working.#also i dont use any gifs or anything i hope u dont mind :pensive:#lmk if i should change anything :~)
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I looked at my mother because I was a version of my mother. I looked away from my mother because I was a version of my mother. I was me, but I was also her—my mother, and I understood this all too well.
— Nora Lange, "Dog Star", pub. The Rupture (#120)
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photographybyhenrik on ig | source
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manners ? oh, how his eyes would like to roll. what of politeness when under attack, taken against one's will — abused ? despite his most prominent affinity for tact, for respect, does jeongmin's expression twist into one of incredulousness at the suggestion. the depth of his frown is hidden well within his visage's bloody destruction. his jaw twitches, yet does his chin lift at the sound of the sharpened clash; the looming and cautionary composition of the other's fine blade. jace isn't surprised to find that its detail is grandiose. how befitting of her owner. despite his burning discomfort is he placated by the wafting scent of cigarette smoke, eyes fluttering shut in attempt to detach. he's in search of it, an escape to somewhere far and deep, away from the impending pain that one simply cannot prepare themselves for. for there must be somewhere, somewhere in the dark for the light to visit; to stay in preservation and rescue — a source of withdrawal from his unwarranted crucifixion.
they open only at the sound of his name in full. jeongmin… cloying and insipid. his irises awaken without amber : they open with a sunless onyx as deep and as raven as his hair. his mouth is to twitch with disgust, a loathing that he may typically reserve internally. yet a lack of energy allows said disgust to spill on the floor alongside his blood, his sweat, and now most effortlessly his tears — rolling swift as the sea tides as the point of the dagger toys with the skin of his neck. what could he do ? he was a fool; and now he sits tied up in the center of the wrong man's attention. go figure. there's little room left for thought as the blade at last meets flesh : piercing and ripping, leaving a blood trail as red as the apple of eve. jace cries — whimpers, really — and the thick liquid drips a slow and satisfying leak down purely un-punctured skin. there's nowhere to go. there's nothing to think. there's nowhere to run. there's nothing to do. the thoughts echo in his mind as the pain sears. it stops — just to start again on the other side with a greater depth. the soles of his dress shoes press harshly into the concrete floor. stupid fucking shoes. stupid fucking decisions. ❝ fuck ! ❞ at last a response other than a sound. its guttural, louder than one might have expected he could get, and the harsh rip of the ropes around his wrists dig as his hands pull with equal strength, though the exploitative is merely followed by a wail. it is a wail so hollow, one that doesn't stop until the ripping does, his breath catching up to his circumstance as he sobs with a sudden incoherence.
perhaps its a punishment well deserved. its the only mental escape jeongmin can assign himself, rapid breathing replacing his cries, though the sniffles remain. although still alight does his will begin to die, the sight of his own injuries hardly capable due to the angle but enough to drain him as the searing pain overtakes. in a haze he can hear the conversational prompts, though he remains perplexed by the ordeal, by his captor's pleasure. it sparks a thought, that perhaps tony's abdication cannot feasibly be the only reason for this game. and perhaps it was, that he should play. ❝ i can see… ❞ albeit barely beyond his tears, his voice nearly incomprehensible, ❝ your eyes… ❞ like mirrors. ❝ i see. ❞ jeongmin's voice trembles, fearful as its timbre betrays despite his search for a direction to bend in, a shape to mold himself into — to please. the other's gaze gives away nothing, only a distinct and dark gratification. and yet, ❝ what is it ? what do you want ? ❞ besides the one thing, the one person that he isn't willing to give away, he hasn't the slightest of clues.
lips curl , tugging the seam of the corner of his lips upward , carve deep amusement into the adorning features of a devil , disguised , clad in the most heavenly of appearances --- and yet . . . entirely void of such appreciation , it leaves the tall male to tsk , smack his lips and tilt his crown . " what blasphemy ! lacking manners ! " , propped cigarette is captured in between his lips --- yet to reveal their distaste of the poorly chosen words --- in the eye of such nefarious , peril --- indeed , is the elder astonished about the vigor , the dying light of vigor . . . burning itself out . . alas , not yet , not yet ! minjun's free hand unsheathes with a gentleness , as if reunited with a lost lover --- grinding , sharpened metal echoing , bouncing of the high walls . the reflection is blinding , long and flat does the surface of the weapon show itself --- its grip adorned by intricate , delicate artwork , clearly not belonging into their age and century .
truly , hardly does he contain the disappointed exhale escaping agape lips . . . on his torn countenance , do his features twist and yet --- do they paint their own tragedy much too close to victory , glide gracefully , snake their way --- flicker and disappear . he offers the flat side of his dagger , taps gently against the bloody chin of the younger . " jeongmin . . . " , a lowly thrumming scold , " such bravery ! i am stunned ! bewildered ! " , tone flips anew --- euphoric , warm --- much too saccharine , does his praise slicker into the forming cracks --- watching them reveal , form , split one by one , do the male's eyes mimic adoration . slowly , a pace and movement that required naught such care to be executed --- does the edge of the blade turn . pointed , curved --- hovered exactly underneath jace's burning skin . the devil tilts his crown upwards , silken strands falling into place --- high enough to meet his damned creator , or so he prays ! " i must remind you . . my sweet , sweet diamond --- the price , the only price -- " , the tip of the dagger travels downwards , passes his neck until it halts anew , in midst of his collarbones . " that should matter to you , right now , is the one those lovely words will cost you . don't you think ? " , heart - shaped lips stretch until they bare ivory , blindingly pristine --- eyes widening in his own excitement ! had he not come to slaughter heaven anew ? to finally taste , truly taste the reunion of a sweetest sensation ? the lack of effort is mere disappointing , as the blade begins to work itself into the flesh of the male's collarbones --- gliding across the thin skin , thin ropes he counts in his head --- hazy , gaze narrowing , kept on the younger seated in front of him . it is satisfactory , chin lightly to tilt lower to eye the other --- and yet . . not nearly enough , no , no !
the elder's lips forming a thin line , a louder sigh escaping before , the blade -- glistening in its new colour of crimson moves to the other collarbone , working itself in , deeper --- again and again , " i truly believed you to be well - behaved . . fooled me ! " , head tilts --- a snicker echoes , sinks into the mere sound of scratching , splitting open flesh to reveal its inner colour , slowly but surely under a precision , clearly holding itself back from unleashing devastation too soon ! grip is about to loosen --- remove the edge of the tilted dagger before the elder's eyes light themselves up , burning ablaze --- in deepest bordeaux ; " don't you lose that little glimmer i see ! right there ! " , euphoric at having spotted such , does body crouch lower , indeed removing the blade . seconds stretch into an agonizing silence --- an adoration of what is before him , do own glances waltz up- and downwards again and again . it sticks like tar , like a curse much too divine , too blissful to shake it off , " you should see yourself . . " , pride is worn with reason --- the brightest of suns , indeed ! a halo , blindingly , sinfully magnificent ! " now ! on to the second round ? or , perhaps , you have something to whisper into my ear ? are you going to leave us hanging ? me and your pretty boyfriend ? all disappointed in you ? " , the genuine concern mirrored on sharp features is a mirage , falsified , faux and despite such --- carefully veiled and projected .
#gore tw#blood tw#torture tw#wow man uh.....damn.#the things ive never seen typing that torture tw tho...#scrrface#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 ‣ interaction . ❞
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SUPERSTORE • S6E15 ↳ “All Sales Final”
#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐌𝐄𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒 ‣ scenes . ❞#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 ‣ attitudinal . ❞#:ROFL: sorry to take this media out of context but retail Jace final boss.
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intrusively wandering eyes, stupidly senseless tongues, jace has long since become accustomed to the waggish ways of his classmates here at nevermore. yes, his peers manage to make the astute observation that he is the sole human at this university. while he has been particularly outcast since his arrival, he isn't one for solitude — and his most optimistic perspective now lends him the energy to finally approach vivian. still, he has sensibility about him, an awareness of his own personality's buoyancy. many take to him easily, others with much resistance. most of the nevermore population identified within the latter category. such fun. vivian's stinging sarcasm is biting and blatant, but jeongmin would not have taken up the task of attending this institution if he had a preference for tale above truth. the suggestion is valid. admirable. ❝ yeah, ❞ he replies, quieter this time, although his newfound volume is subsequently sabotaged by the immediately following series of pops from his gum again. ❝ i lied. i've actually been coming here all semester and i always see you here. but wouldn't it be even more awkward if i was all like 'what's up vivian, i've been watching you at the library waiting for a chance to say hi until now' ? i had to come up with something. ❞ a response befitting of the other's honesty. ❝ i think we should study together. ❞ cue the imaginary and unceremonious sound of a sorrowful trombone.
the pain rears its head near at once, the sunny tone and piercing voice worming into her ear. who-? oh. the question dies before it fully forms. she knew this person, knew of at the least; it wasn’t every day a normie joined the ranks of a nevermore student. besides, she’d heard him in a number of her courses, volume control clearly was not his forte. as her luck would have it neither were boundaries—mouth just barely ajar, an eyebrow pulled up in a silent question. she feels the glances raking over them, she had no social capital to begin with, but this? she would never recover; mind now preoccupied with studies, murders, a normie, and her reputation. action had to be taken. she turns to him voice low, ❝ jace, is it? yeah, really funny meeting you here. in the school library. during testing season. i digress, is there… something i can help you with? ❞ her bag in hand, notebook shutting. his disposition unsettled her, he was too sweet too bright. ‘god, i sound like wednesday.’ there was little need to be so forthcoming with strangers without ulterior motives, it was only smart to minimize interactions with him. lest she find herself marked next.
#noviicaine#OJFKEDJKF hes aggravating like just say u want to be friends bro.#sorry this took me ages .#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 ‣ interaction . ❞
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Mark ft. puppies
#ur welc!#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐀𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐓 ‣ attitudinal . ❞#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐕𝐈𝐒𝐔𝐀𝐋 ‣ attire . ❞#✩‧₊˚ . ❪ 𝐕𝐈𝐒𝐔𝐀𝐋 ‣ appearance . ❞
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