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you can pry starting sentences with 'and' or 'but' out of my cold, dead hands

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schlatt w/ jackass!reader

HI MY NAME IS JOHNNY KNOXVILLE AND YIURE WATCHNG JACKASS

-but it's you lol

-you guys are introduced by him being sent a clip of you eating shit after failing a skateboard trick and he's been hooked since

-finding the channel you run with 5 of your friends

-drawn in by how well all of you maintain the early 2000s grunge aesthetic, clicking onto your channel was like stepping into a time machine

-he was actually surprised when he saw that the videos were posted recently and doing fairly well, and not from some obscure channel that one of his viewers had found in the dark recesses of the internet

-audience freaking when they hear his laughter behind the camera, recording you hurling down a steep hill, donning a pair of roller skates that you'd duck taped roman candle fireworks to

-him in the background of your skating videos wearing a helmet, elbow pads and knee pads despite just being there to look pretty

"The fuck're you wearing those for?"

"Do you realize how fucked up it is that I have to be the one to set a good example here?"

-him having to get used to how rough you and your friends are with one another, not able to do much more than shout when one of your friends comes and socks you in the side of the head with a boxing glove out of nowhere

-chilling in the garage with you as you work on another project for the channel, whether it be a home made ramp for you so barrel down on a bmx or a cannon to shoot yourself out of

-him frothing at the mouth as he watches you light the end of a blunt hanging between your lips using a blowtorch

-has to cover his eyes whenever you and your friends complete more daunting tasks

-like the time you quite literally jumped into a bullpen "for the bit"

-or the time you tried to jump a bus on a children's tricycle that you had somehow put a motor on

-him being dragged into the extreme pranks you pull on eachother

-he'd been woken up by them bursting into your shared room with airhorns enough times that now he just grumbles and throws a pillow at them before rolling over, dragging you with him

-he does NOT approve when the six of you up the ante, fucking PISSED where he's precariously balanced on a kitchen stool, looking down at the massive snake you guys had somehow gotten into the apartment

-shouting curses at you as you laugh from the doorway, a cat safely tucked under each arm

-you sleep on the couch that night lmao

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(through gritted teeth) so incheresting how you have interpreted this television show we have both seen! you know it's like i always say. the world is full of many people and in my necessarily limited perspective i may only ever understand but a few of them. haha!

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Some more gifs of Spencer's hands

Hey everybody. Sadly I'm not into Criminal minds anymore :( I'm posting the rest of the gifs I still have on my phone so they don't go to waste but I am not gonna make new ones anymore. Just wanted to let anyone that follows this account know!

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top five most important things you can give a character. 1. bisexuality. 2. autism. 3. so much negative rizz it loops around into irresistibility. 4. so many bad events. 5. a coping mechanism that’s cute and silly provided you don’t think about it too hard

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Just a reminder that Reid is not helpless in the face of authority. This is a man who told Strauss to her face that she was taking the easy way before saying ‘the problem is I have an eidetic memory, and that’s not what happened.’ This is the man who told an entire station of police officers that they could’ve prevented a death before sarcastically yelling at Hotch ‘oh you’re punishing me?.’ This man sat slouched in his seat whilst his team were all sat pin straight in front of a board of people who wanted them all fired and said ‘this is calm and it’s doctor.’ He looked Linda Barnes in the eyes whilst she was in the process of trying to destroy the team and said ‘if you’re going I’m not.’ This man does not care about authority.

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pretty boy

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i need to play with his hair 😇

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their hands… they didn’t let go 

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S08 | E06 - "The Apprenticeship"

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my favorite cm opening scene of all time. everything about this is perfect from emily getting hit square in the forehead and then wanting to see it again to "physics...magic" to spencer's adorable grinch face to them implying spencer has done this before and to HOTCH SMILING

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last day of autism awareness month please be aware of him

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it's like they gave bambi a gun

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Spencer Reid + sunglasses <3

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ENTROPY

“Considering everything you’ve put Garcia and so many people through, you’re going to have to shoot me in the face before you walk out of here.”

DATE NIGHT

“Come here. C’mere. The only date that I’ll be there for is the one where they stick a needle in your vein.”