bludsuqa

[bludsuqa]

I sit and think about what I’ve done. Although what they done to me is horrible. I should’ve never said what I said or done what I’ve done. Nobody truly deserves to be hurt. I see good in everyone even the worst. I hate the things I do out of anger because it only pains me after. Regret regret regret. Consumes my body I wish I didn’t let them make me a bad person. Me, I ,myself had the choice to do good but I didn’t I acted out on my emotions. I said I could control myself but truly there’s times I can’t. I wish I got angry over bigger situations as much as I did for little things. It really hurts me in the moment because I would’ve never even thought of doing what you did to me. Hurting you hurt more than when you hurt me. Although you did what you did. If I could go back and somehow fix everything and help you I would. I know you all went through a lot that’s why I feel nothing but sympathy for you. If I could go and save you all when you were kids and gave you the life you deserved I would. Because you were also someone’s baby, you also had dreams, motives, you also lived and never fully got chances to really understand how beautiful life can really be. Your life was constantly full of darkness and loss of hope. I tried to be your light even when I was burning out myself. You took advantage of that you felt the warmth and only wanted more. You took until I had nothing yet. But at the end of the day I still feel bad for you.

[bludsuqa]

to my daughter, I leave my millions of pinterest boards, my oddly specific spotify playlists, and my concerning tumblr posts

[bludsuqa]

[bludsuqa]

that’s it ,.. that’s all - just a bisexual mess hehe

[bludsuqa]

I wish people would understand the actual world issues we’re going through not only in America but globally. The government is doing everything in their power to control us, we’re nothing but live stock to them yet people still have the audacity to support these awful people just because they “have the same beliefs”. How can one see a blasphemy filled Christian who rapes, and assaults woman, a pedophile, a disgrace to humanity, a racist, full of ignorance, a man who doesn’t use his soul and only his rotted mind, as a good man. But! he doesn’t support LGBTQ, he’s white, a “Christian”, and man so I guess that makes him awesome idk how you people think. He is the devil walking on earth yet you use your shameful fucking beliefs to back him up. Nothing will ever change the person that he is, he acts like a child when’s he’s at the edge of death, it’s embarrassing and everyone who follows him are just as stupid. There’s bigger issues in the world other than gay people living their lives, trans people, abortions, and not everyone being a Christian. These things do not affect you the way ACTUAL world issues are affecting you and EVERYONE else. Climate change is making humans and animals face new challenges for survival every year. Habitats and people’s communities are being wrecked due to these weather complications. We have less than 5 years before we reach a point of irreversible and potentially catastrophic climate impacts. Yet we have a president that doesn’t believe in global warming for the next 4 years. This is only ONE of the many world issues we have and just that one issue can end us all. I wish more people actually cared about other people,the animals, the trees, the plants, all life on earth should be appreciated and kept safe. Yet all we do is ruin our earth. Praying to a man in the sky to make a change, isn’t going to do anything. He isn’t doing anything for us, we have to do it ourselves and stop expecting it from blessings. Why worship a man that’s doing nothing to help us. When you can worship the earth and make it better for you and everyone else around you.

[bludsuqa]

People are just so fucking stupid and just genuinely don’t deserve to fucking breathe, speak, or live. Simply their existence is too much of a blessing, for their rotten souls and mold filled brains. They’re living zombies who don’t deserve to walk on the beautiful earth we were placed on. Poison is all they are continuing to rot and ruin everything they touch and pass. Death is all they will ever deserve, but even death is not a punishment that can equal to the disgrace they have brought to this world.

[bludsuqa]

Pray

I prayed for you

Every night

To come

And save me

To free me

Release my neck from this bear trap

To pour water on me

While they set me on fire

To be my relief

And a breathe of fresh air

But all I received was silence

And all you did

Was pour gas

While they set me on fire

Now from life to afterlife

I will burn for eternity.

-Dinelia25

[bludsuqa]

TOO MANY

too many people thinking

Too many people in one body

I’m too many people

I’m stuck in one body

With different thoughts

Different opinions

Different feelings

They all interfere with one another

And I’m still not sure which one

Is really me

-Dinelia25

[bludsuqa]

ITCH

There’s this itch

In my brain

That can never be scratched

No matter

How hard I want to

As much as it floods

My head

I can’t bring myself to do it

I don’t want to do it

But this itch

I fear one day

I won’t be able to control myself

And I’ll scratch the itch

I’ll scratch it so hard

It bleeds

It scars

The itch is gone

But at what cost

It doesn’t itch anymore

But it’s starting to burn.

-Dinelia25

[bludsuqa]

Carving my skin off and eating it later.

[bludsuqa]

Eat me, rip me apart, consume me inside and out, make me a part of you forever.

Have me in a way no one else ever could.