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Scares the Dickens out them. 😳

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The notes are broken. This is what tumblr is all about apparently.

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Like clockwork

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In case you forgot, fandom is for freaks by freaks.

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Being aroace as a teenager feels like being the only sober person at a rave.

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How do they keep making later and later stages of late-capitalism

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The push and pull of “relationships can be very affectionate and still be platonic” and “those are the gayest motherfuckers I’ve ever seen”.

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I read that capsaicin makes your mouth feel like it’s burning because it increases your nerve sensitivity to heat, and menthol works by doing the same thing to cold

So if I eat a habanero pepper and then chew a bunch of breath mints they’ll each other out and I’ll be fine

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Funny to me to think about the whole "oh you say you don't like <insert website> but you'll gladly reblog content FROM <insert website>" as like... trade exports between nations that all a little bit don't like each other.

"Come try these grapes. They're from Tiktok." "OH Tiktok? Wonderful. They grow the best grapes. We just don't have the right terrain for them here." "I agree. Lovely grapes. Wretched country though, I'd never live there." "Oh me neither. They cancel their peasants in the town square. Speaking of, have you seen the new textiles boypussydilf is selling in the town square? Imported from Instagram!" "Oh amazing textiles, Instagram has. Wretched country though." "Absolutely wretched."

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adhd paralysis sucks bcuz im just sitting there and my brain is like

YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME YOU ARE WASTING TIME

no work done no rest gained. literally no point of this at all

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growing up playing Pokemon really did define my entire gaming strategy as an adult because even now RPGs will be like "be sure to use status effects :)" and small gremlin me rises up from the depths of my soul all "no status effects, only power"

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just remember, one day you're going to open tumblr and the crabs will be raving like they never have before

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Fever is a hilarious immune response. Our bodies tell the disease “hey, wanna see which one of us dies of overheating first? No? Too bad.” and honestly they’re not even the winners a decent chunk of the time but it works often enough that we never evolved it away or anything. Fantastic work.

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never forget the universal rule of the order of things: People Will Not Read It

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you have to outlive donald trump