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Hi Tumblr, it’s been a long time!

It has been 6 years since I last wrote a blog post. But, with some encouragement from my massively talented friend @sketchedbyjuilee, I’m writing again. Has the lockdown been influential in me coming back to Tumblr? Sure, yes. Has the fact that I’m slightly bored of Facebook and Instagram? Abso-freaking-lutely yes!

I have a grand total of 6 followers, who I’d like to thank still follow me, it’s very nice. But just to update, in the past years, I graduated, not once, but thrice. the first degree- very special 5 years of my life that gave me WAY more than a degree. The second- eh, I wanted to dabble in some inter-disciplinary studies. The third, however, is very special- I didn’t exactly make a lot of friends or warm and fuzzy memories, but I found myself (sort of) and took a huge step in following my passion and a cause that’s very close to my heart.

Honestly, I was so busy doing all this that I may have stopped noticing other people. By the time I understood this, I thought I had lost out on a lot of special people in my life and that I didn’t matter anymore. But recently, as I stood outside my house talking to a couple of my oldest friends, one of them (very casually) said that she was proud of me for everything. I didn’t say anything to her then, but I swear, I could’ve cried.

Which just shows, some things are always right there, even if you think you’ve lost them. So, in the spirit of rediscovering friendships we have lost, three cheers to my friend and to tumblr! 

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Today, I read a quote by Cornelia Funke-

“Isn’t it odd how much fatter a book gets when you’ve read it several times? As if something were left between the pages every time you read it. Feelings, thoughts, sounds, smells, and then when you look at the book again many years later, you find yourself there too, a slightly younger self, slightly different, as if the book had preserved you like a pressed flower, both strange and familiar.”

I went back a few days when I was clearing out my old books. And I got this same feeling, and began to wonder how much I had changed.

When I was small, I was the typical innocent nerd, but I was an introvert, and though I’m not proud of it, I was very condescending and judgmental. I refused to give people a second chance, and often turned up my nose at things I did not like. It makes me laugh when I think about it now.

Today, I’m definitely a different person. As I met different kinds of people, I realized that being judgmental and rude is really stupid. You never can know enough about a person to do that. I’ve matured, in a sense. I’m still a nerd and a little shy, and stubborn, but that’s okay. That is who I am. And who knows? I might change.  When I look back, I see myself as I have progressed through the years. I still may not be the best person to know, but I’m happy for now with that.

As I took out the books that I’d purchased years back and that held no interest for me, I see it as me gradually letting go of the person I was and incorporating new experiences in my life. I want to be a better person then what I was and am, and it seems that it will take time. Till then, I’ll try my best to be me.  I don’t want to my books to capture the essence of a person who I don’t want to be.

So, do I prefer the person I was or the person I am? Neither, because we change, and that is exactly what I would like to read when I open my books a few years later.

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   There’s this weird habit that we have all developed with the coming in of social networking and cameras in phones. We take photos wherever an whenever possible, pose next to people we don’t even like and then post it on your wall. Of course, not all photos are that way, we do genuinely take some pictures sometimes to preserve the memories of our loved ones. But, in most social gatherings, we just tend preserve our fake smiles. Why do we do this? Maybe because its easier now to take pictures with our phones, and even easier to upload them on the spot.    But the main question here is- why even pose with fake smiles and no genuine warmth for the person next to you? Maybe, subconsciously, we are assuring our own selves that we are not alone. That we have friends, whether or not it is truly friendship. That we look good, that our self- image issues are just a play of our mind, right? That we are happy with a buzzing social life, and lots of people surrounding us. Maybe we are just trying to eliminate how alone we occasionally feel.    Because, come on, lets face it- loneliness is a rising issue in most modern societies. We don't trust many people. We create a world of our own since its so easy to just escape the harsh realities of today.    It could be that I'm completely wrong about the whole photo thing. Its a 100 percent possibility. Or, we could just look into our own minds the next time we pose for what I call 'a fake photo' and ask ourselves "why?"

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Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.

Buddha

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"Some people bring out the worst in you, others bring out the best, and then there are those remarkably rare, addictive ones who just bring out the most. Of everything. They make you feel so alive that you'd follow them straight into hell, just to keep getting your fix."

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“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear. The brave may not live forever, but the cautious do not live at all. From now on, you’ll be travelling the road between who you think you are and who you can be. The key is to allow yourself to make the journey.”

Unknown

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Travelling the road between a child and an adult, I reflected the life that had been cuddled; I would get up early to see the birds catch their worms, And always wonder what meant by perms; During monsoon, I danced in puddles, Begone the illnesses that caused hurdles; Brown dirt our shoes made, The mangoes will never forget our raids; Injuries made out tears flow, The boat of life, they taught us to row; Tom and Jerry chased each other, The lights went out right after supper; Our eyes closed the first note of lullaby, And in came dreams where angels would fly.

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A touch of humanity

Today morning I was at the railway platform, waiting for my train. Meanwhile, another train left from the same platform. A man, his wife and their daughter ran to get into that train. The man picked up the girl and got in. But the woman had a lot of luggage in her hand. Her husband pulled her up by the arm and they all got into the moving train. But in the process of getting into the train, a bag fell onto the platform. It must be having all important things, because the woman gave a cry of despair when it fell. I felt bad. But no one on the platform could do anything. The train was already moving. However, when the train was moving out, a guy, who was standing in the rear end compartment bent down when he passed the spot. For a minute, I thought he was a thief. But then he called out to the lady, and told her that he'd got it. It warmed my heart to see that someone had done something about it. The man had bent down from a fast moving train, a dangerous feat, to help a stranger get her bag back. I was touched to see the humanity that he displayed, assuring me that all is not yet lost

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Kalaghoda festival, Mumbai(Bombay). These are awesome cloth balls having various expressions.

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All that is gold does not glitter Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not whither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost. From the ashes a fire shall be woken, A light from the shadows shall spring; Renewed shall be the blade that was broken, The crownless again shall be king." -J.R.R.Tolkien

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The sun is one constant thing in our life.It rises every morning and sets every evening .It appears whether you look a at it as a water reflection,through the water, through the canopy of trees, from a mountain or from thee desert.It never changes its calm austere, whatever the situation may be.

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     Some places have personality- the capability to make you feel the emotions that they want you to experience. Some make you disturbed, some happy, and some calm. A few days ago, I encountered such a place- the top of a cliff right alongside the beach. The moment I saw it, I felt calm, like something inside me had finally peacefully taken a breath.

     It was a cool place, literally cold, and warm at the same time because of the sunrays that were falling on the cliff. It was beautiful burst of colors- the sparkling blue ocean spread out in front of me, the sun a flaming orange and the green of the trees growing on the hillside. It took my breath away.

    I sat down on a rock on the cliff and for some time, just kept on staring at the view in front of me. I was feeling devoid of any negative thoughts. This feeling was intense, something I’d never felt before. The calmness that was spreading through my mind was strange- something like a gentle smile, a warm hug, a sweet memory. I felt as if nothing in the world would ever be wrong again, that the whole world was at peace in spite of the fact that from that point I could also see the hustle and bustle of a city.

    The wind was whipping on my face and I was at a great height, a fact which would have prevented me from sitting on that rock but I did, nevertheless. The ocean had always been one of my favorites and being there in front of it made me happy…unreasonably happy. The sound of the waves crashing on the rocks below-it felt familiar-like I’d been living my whole on the beach. Somehow that place felt more home than any other beach I’d ever been to.

     I could have sat there forever except for the fact that it was going to be dark soon. As I was leaving, an adjective suddenly came to my mind, from who know where. And I’m thinking, “This place is wizard..super wizard!”

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                                                   "The earth is what we all have in common" 

     When i was in school, i had no idea of how serious the effects of global warming.All it meant to me that we would not be able to experience winter.Sea-level rise, drowning coastal cities.. i never really thought of that.Then one fine day,when my seniors were making a project on greenhouse effect, i saw the posters and realized the intensity. Purely interested initially, i googled it and i was shocked to know the state of affairs. It was then that i came to know about somethings known as carbon footprint, green footprint and others. This topic caught like never before.Realizing an individual's contribution to this great change, i decided to change my habits and make them eco-friendly. Along with it i learnt about eutrophication, soil erosion, soil pollution, receding water levels, etc. With a determined will, i set out to do all i could at an individual level. A new regime began in my house- less detergents, saving water, growing plants and stuff like that.

    While all this was happening, i realized something- no matter what i did, how many ever hobbies i indulged myself in, i couldn't take my mind of what was happening to our earth. It bothered me every spare second i had. My conscience never let me forget that we all had to do something..and fast. So one fine day i decided that no matter what career i chose, what field i went in, i would do something that would be in support of our environment.

   We humans were granted intelligence and social skills for a reason. We evolved, progressed, maybe now it is time that we reflect on whether we have used these skills for the benefit of the whole earth or just ourselves. Maybe it is time to repair the damage we've done because this planet does not belong to us alone-there are million other species who have a claim on it. We are the voice of our earth and we cannot ignore our responsibilities. We cannot let it die and perish. Our little actions damage nature in ways we cannot imagine...and it is definitely time to stop, look back and repair.

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Goa - Where life is simply beautiful.

"We must strive to reach that simplicity that lies beyond sophistication" ~ Anonymous