bingusmachine
bingusmachine
5K posts
she/her 17
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bingusmachine · 3 years ago
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Averaged Faces of Members of the 116th United States Congress
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bingusmachine · 3 years ago
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bingusmachine · 3 years ago
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You know I gotta learn shitpost brevity. Most of my successful posts are like 3 paragraph essays, minimum. Fucking dissertations. Terrible note-to-word ratio. Inefficient. In this economy? In this economy? Unsustainable. Everyone else posting "blowing my balls up at the bomb factory" and getting 50,000 notes. Amazing ROI. They're the future and I'm on dial-up. The market's gonna out-compete me.
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bingusmachine · 3 years ago
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love this guy but he has got to stop storing his pills n powders in unmarked ziploc bags
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bingusmachine · 3 years ago
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he is literally. the biggest ally.
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bingusmachine · 3 years ago
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bingusmachine · 3 years ago
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#ce
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bingusmachine · 3 years ago
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Obsessed w her
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bingusmachine · 3 years ago
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Come on man you can't make me read about such an emotional topic and then throw that picture into the slide
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bingusmachine · 3 years ago
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bingusmachine · 3 years ago
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bingusmachine · 3 years ago
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I mean on the one hand, yes, shipping spongebob characters is certifiably absurd and people who do it do not deserve rights but on the OTHER hand if you took Spongebob and Squidward's personalities and dropped them into, say, a pair of anime girls from a gacha game or two white guys from a teen drama everyone would be like "oh of COURSE this is a big ship"
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bingusmachine · 3 years ago
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bingusmachine · 3 years ago
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bingusmachine · 3 years ago
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Sex is so gross I’m just gonna keep welding
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bingusmachine · 3 years ago
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"Is Calling Nancy Reagan a Throat GOAT misogynist" - the greatest thread in the history of forums, locked by a moderator after 12,239 pages of heated debate
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bingusmachine · 3 years ago
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This astounds me because imagine her leveling with sponfebob like this. Recognizing that he understand what she’s saying. He is an adult sponge and she knows this. He acts like a little gay bitch and he is one but she’s like cut the crap Robert don’t you go sticking that long ass nose into kitchens it doesn’t belong because you can’t handle the heat you can’t handle what I’m cooking. The implications. He can’t handle it, because he’s a pansy, and that she knows he’s a pussy and that he knows he’s a pussy. He’s too soft for her world. Puff has been in state penn. she has been in and out of the system and she THRIVED in it. Her husband is DEAD. He’s a LAMP. She has committed grand larceny and vehicular manslaughter as well as evasion of police and resisting arrest. She’s probably assaulted an officer. Don’t fuck with her. You can’t handle the answer sponfebob so don’t even ask. Go home to your little fruit, get into your three mattress bed and turn off the lights. You are CANONICALLY homosexual.
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