biglots-official

[biglots-official]

[biglots-official]

PLEASE JUST TAKE THEM YOU CAN HAVE THEM FOR FREE

We have bees for sale!

Buy one bee, get 74,391 for free!

Please take them they’re taking over the store!

HELP US

[biglots-official]

Yeesh, last Thursday we had to fend off an army of little shits from the store. They said they were looking for some kind of “trick or treat”???

Do we look like a charity??????

[biglots-official]

HELL YEAH

Edit

YOU MOTHER FUCKER

Your gender is now the first randomized wikipedia article you get. No rerolls.

[biglots-official]

Can I please get your professional opinion?

I could tell you if any building is a twink, butch, Femme, Bear, bisexual man, bi girl, or any number of other things

[biglots-official]

Our products are so good they would instantly destroy a Victorian child!

[biglots-official]

We have bees for sale!

Buy one bee, get 74,391 for free!

Please take them they’re taking over the store!

HELP US

[biglots-official]

Yeah pretty much…

Have an expired coupon!

I think we should ban every twitter account that’s not like this to fix the website

[biglots-official]

Happy Spooky Month!

Our Halloween display is haunted!

By the spirit of savings!

(And also the vengeful spirits of customers who’s expired coupons we refused to take, but just ignore them)

[biglots-official]

Hey quick question…

Who the fuck is this twink and why is he trying to peddle MY deals?!

Edit:

Turns out this was our mascot from the ‘90’s?!

This twink has doing this longer than I’ve been alive?!?!?!

[biglots-official]

This is me btw. If you even care

[biglots-official]

our dvd section is still better than netflix

[biglots-official]

I am in your walls eating all of the cotton candy inside.

It’s called BUSINESS

LOOK IT UP!!1!!1!11

[biglots-official]

Never thought that a tumblr parody account of Big Lots would outlive the whole fucking company. Now the company’s been delisted from the stock exchange and it’s owned by the same people who run Dollar Shave Club. So many stores are closing every day, and I’m not sure if Big Lots will stick around.

It’s pretty corny, but I’ll kind of miss Big Lots if it completely disappears. I was a cashier in a sanitized corporate store, but it was one of the most fun work experiences I’ve ever had. It wasn’t the automated systems that made it good, it was the people. Seeing a small glimmer genuine happiness from my customers while I helped them or just had a conversation with them. It was the time I spent goofing off with my coworkers and managers. It may have been a soulless corporation, but was my blorbo of a soulless corporation.

It’s a bit sad to watch a company that impacted me so much crumble apart.

Anyways here’s Wonderwall

[biglots-official]

BASED

BASED

BASED

Fun fact, my dumbass tried low-balling for an NFT with expired coupons. What a fool of me to make such an insulting offer to you my lord!

Please accept one on the house as a form of retribution!

Important Confession

I lied about my NFT status (value, connection to the blockchain, etc.) and took thousands of dollars from my followers using this blog and I truly apologize.

[biglots-official]

You Know What? Fuck you

We just trademarked the color orange

Look at all of these shades below

Tangerine, apricot, sandstone, all OURS

The licensing fee to use any of the color orange is now $79.99 per minute

Bitch (derogatory)

[biglots-official]

Big Lots Deals!

Buy 1 lobotomy, get a second one FREE!