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elf sex 2024

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*thinking so hard about my oc*

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GUARDS !! coat this fool in olive oil and allow them to rise overnight. come morning we shall turn them into focaccia bread

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me playing a stealth game in the year of our lord 2025: it's good, but it's not dishonored (2012)

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always blows my mind as a european when people talk about states like “yeah theres nothing in ohio/montana/wyoming/etc” because i look at a map like but. but theyre so big. every state could qualify as its own country what do you mean theres nothing there. and then i ask people from those states and theyre like “yeah theres nothing here” what do you mean theres nothing there!!!

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i need a peon

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*puts the tip of my sword in your mouth* enough, you will only talk when I tell you t- stop sucking on it

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FELT IS THE WARMEST PLACE TO HIDE

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have realized that while i am not a fan necessarily of "people meet and immediately fall in love" i am a fan of "people meet and are immediately obsessed with each other." the love can come later but the absolute fixation should be immediate

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a magical sword can only be pulled from its anvil by a maiden of purest heart. a young knight visits the anvil daily to make the attempt, crushed each time he cannot do the deed, yearning for a sign from the universe that he *is* in truth what he yearns to be. for the world to plop the gift of identity into outstretched arms. but of course, it never does. until one day, he has a chance encounter with a nymph of the lake who was once an ordinary squire, and he learns from her that maidenhood will not be given to him, that he must be brave and choose it for himself. and so the knight changes her name and reintroduces herself to the world and employs the greatest miracles of modern science to become the maiden she had always dreamed of being, and this time, when she revists the sword, she only can't pull it because she's kind of an asshole.

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i believe "nothingburger" is the cowardly enemy of the humble and kind everything bagel

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if you want to get better at drawing then you need to get obsessed with a freaky little character and draw them a billion times

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“your characters need to be likeable” allow me to introduce you to the very worst guy who ever lived

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I’m planning out my bedroom when i live on my own next year

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whoever keeps shooting rusty chains with hooks at me from the darkness STOP