bfrb-culture-is

[bfrb-culture-is]

to my fellow humans struggling with bfrbs (body focused repetitive behaviours):

you are not a monster, you are not disgusting or shameful, you are a person worthy of love and care and respect :)

About a week ago, I had one of the worst episodes of skin biting in months, I'm doing better now but I wanted to put some tips and reminders here!

I didn't know that there was terms for my behaviours until like a few months ago (even though this has been a thing since I was really young), since shame and stigma got in the way of anyone in my family actually doing any research/getting me help (i.e. i had to deal with it on my own :<)

[note: a lot of these are for dermatophagia/onychophagia since I can talk from personal experience, feel free to add your own advice!]

Water is a big thing that can be triggering, since it can reveal flaps of skin (when your skin absorbs the water and your skin goes wrinkly), so a lot of these revolve around water.

If the skin around your fingers is affected, go wash your hands immediately after an episode of the repetitive behaviour! Rinsing my mouth also helps sometimes.

go get yourself some (cheap) hand cream from your local drugstore. I always keep moisturiser on me to use after I was my hands/do the dishes/have a shower/anytime my hands feel dry

Wash the dishes with gloves/use a dishmatic/if you have a dishwasher and it doesn't cost too much to use you can use that

Try turning off the water in your shower whilst applying soap to your body. If showers are completely too triggering, flannels and deodorant (but at least try to shower if you've exercised/once every few days). Equally, washing your hands should be fine, but if not, then hand sanitiser (be careful of cuts though!)

I exfoliate around my fingers with brown sugar like once every two days if my fingers don't hurt, I'm not sure of the proven efficacy of it removing dead skin from the surface but it makes me feel good (it's a good replacement activity)

nail oils! jojoba oil is known to be good, but i used to use virgin olive oil because it's also good (and it was something I had at home). Right now I just use shea butter! just moisturise in any way possible!

There are some things that people say such as bitter nail solutions and gum, but I used to just chew right through those, so remember that there is no one solution that works for everyone (some of these won't help you, and that's fine)

Plasters tend to stop air from getting to small cuts on your fingers so try not to use those (they weren't very helpful for me, at least)

When your hands start healing, gloves can help, but the fabric tends to catch onto skin/nails so be careful with that (and when you're putting on clothes in general)

Nail polish/rings if you like them! You shouldn't feel like you have to wait until your fingers are better before you can look nice :)

Knitting/fiddling with rings/making sure your doing something with your hands can be useful sometimes, but it's totally understandable if you just start with one little piece of skin and you end up like completely wrecking your fingers (when you start, you often can't stop)

Be aware of possible triggers. it's very hard to do this since sometimes episodes come out of nowhere, but I know i'm more likely to start biting my skin after stressful events or during task paralysis/when my brain is "stuck" (the logic is that my brain can be "stuck" on something else instead of all these impending things i have to do but can't get myself to start doing)

Remind yourself how much your hands help you to experience the world around you - You write, read, use technology, make and eat food, play your favourite games, hug your friends and create with your hands! You owe it to yourself to keep them safe and healthy where possible. Be compassionate with yourself (it will often be in spite of the way others treat you - but we are all here for you!)

talking about it can always help too with removing guilt/shame (I am always down to talk) and reading other posts on the tags here can feel v validating (@bfrb-culture-is has been so so helpful in making me feel less alone!)

I do hope this is helpful, this post is as much for me as it is for anyone else that comes across it <3

Have a good day~

[bfrb-culture-is]

Bfrb culture is not posting for months on end. So sorry y'all! I'm going to start queuing up posts today and hopefully clear everything out :)

[bfrb-culture-is]

is this blog still active? or are you just not getting many asks anymore?

yes, i'm still active, i'm just very burnt out and don't have energy to answer them at the moment. there's around 40 in the inbox right now and i will answer them, hopefully soon! y'all can keep sending them in, just know it will be a while before i answer them <3

[bfrb-culture-is]

btw if you have dermatillomania or trichotillomania or onychophagia or rhinotillexomania or any other bfrb i love you & i hope you're having a great day & that you get a good night's sleep tonight

[bfrb-culture-is]

this is a bfrb culture thing but also me asking if anyone else has this

i have these tiny bits of skin on the tips of my pointer fingers which are calloused and i thought it was from playing my bass but i think its from hair pulling and having my nail dig into my finger so much the skin has thickened.

sorry if this is confusing it’s 1am

no this makes sense

[bfrb-culture-is]

Hi the vampire thing was in reference to the ask about being allergic to adhesives! Saw you were confused just thought I'd clear it up

thanks! i ended up looking it up later and i think i understand now

[bfrb-culture-is]

if you don't mind,, I have some good news about my trich, I haven't pulled facial hair for 10 days!!🎉🎉 don't know who else to tell because my friends don't care but basically I became comfortable with the idea of having facial hair, so im letting it grow out and then if I don't like it I'll shave instead of pulling

omg congrats!!!

[bfrb-culture-is]

people getting surprised and very shocked when I go "yea that one got infected again I think, I'll just get it out later" especially when I tell them about it cause I tend to have to use sharp tools to start

every time without fail "wtf??"

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[bfrb-culture-is]

Brfb culture is continuing to be a vampire but having to stop yourself in public either because you're wearing a mask or helping customers and it being almost as bad to not pick/vampire as it is to do it

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[bfrb-culture-is]

Brfb culture is bruises where you've squeezed ur skin too much

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[bfrb-culture-is]

[picking at my scabs] heehee hoohoo texture be gone. surely there will be no repercussions

[bfrb-culture-is]

bfrb culture is knowing you should be wearing gloves to stop you from biting / picking at your hands but not wanting to wear gloves because it's so hot out

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[bfrb-culture-is]

Skin picking culture (derm): getting upset that you cant pick a certain scab with your fingers so you get a small knife, nailclipper, or cuticle scissors, to dig it out properly

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[bfrb-culture-is]

onychophagia culture is getting hangnail and then chewing your skin, cuticle, and nails raw to try get rid of it because it bothers you too much

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[bfrb-culture-is]

BFRB + autism culture is constantly asking yourself if you're pulling your hair/picking your hair because you're bored/nervous or if you're in a sensory seeking mood </3

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[bfrb-culture-is]

Onychotillomania culture is not being able to sleep because your nail beds are throbbing in pain.

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[bfrb-culture-is]

Dermatillomania culture is getting cute plasters to put on scabs so that you can still feel the picking sensation when you subconsciously pick without accidentally making yourself bleed, whilst also looking fun.

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