bematthew
shining stars
39 posts
matthew "matty" luong.2000.03.17.I don't know how to say this I hope this song's on your playlist. This feeling's so hard to explain. I don't even know how to talk right now. I want you to hear me say: moonlight, sunrise, baby, come be my starlight.
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bematthew · 1 year ago
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noelxbe​:
         it’d been a while since noel had last visited canada, he had been too busy, and he was still too busy. as much as he loved korea, he had some friends he missed, it wasn’t the same to just text and facetime, but for now there was still a while to they would meet again. some of them had seen next gen, to noel’s surprise, but they’d only watched it for noel, how they figured out about the show was still a mystery to noel though. they’d jokingly said they’d meet again when noel made it big and went on tour, noel felt like they were dramatic, because he was still far from being a good rapper, singer or dancer, if he was going down the idol path, it was still a long journey.
“is it your first summer in korea then?” he tilts his head, curious. “hit me up when you’re bored, i’ll show you how to spend a summer in korea” he sends a smile “ah there’s so many ice cream you have to taste! i was never a big fan of ice cream until i came to korea” he chuckles, then nods “she’ll probably go back to her old cold self, she might seem cold, but my cat is cool, got her own charm” he lets a chuckle leave his lips.
matty nodded. “yeah it will be!” on the one hand he would miss home dearly. on the other going back home now would probably tamper with his chances of getting signed. and if he had any chance now it was a small one. so he had to really buckle down and make sure that he was taking every opportunity that he could. or at least sit down and really figure out what his ultimate goal was here. “i’m trusting you to be my summer guide then. if it doesn’t go well it’s all on you.” matty said jokingly.
he was sure that summer in south korea would go just fine. he’d just have to figure out how he was going to earn money in the mean time. he laughed when noel said his cat would go back to her usual self soon enough. “at least you know that she did miss you while you were gone.” he said. “sometimes it’s almost worse when pets don’t react to your absence.” matty’s parents had a dog and the first time matty had come back from south korea the dog had barely reacted to his presence in the house again. it somewhat bruised matty’s ego. of course now the dog acted like matty was the best thing since buttered bread whenever he came home.
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bematthew · 2 years ago
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jindallaebe​:
matty is playful, and jindallae likes that—leans into it, even. each flirtatious comment rouses a smile from him, and every time he glances over at his guest, he feels his blood rush south, but he’s doing his best to hold off from starting that particular fire too soon. if he’s reading the room correctly, it’ll happen eventually, so raising the temperature of their dynamic now seems almost presumptuous of him. instead, he simply wants to indulge in the lighthearted banter, provocative embraces, and sweet teasing for the time being. it’ll make the main event all the more climactic when the time is right, he knows that, and though his “date” tells him not to mess up his hair, an impish ( devilish ) grin settles on his visage—one that’s rather true to his character; one that’s tugged at the corners of his mouth since he was a mischief-making child. 
reaching forward, he lightly weaves his fingers into matty’s wild mane and tousles it—watching as the strands perk up in all different directions. “it’s almost impossible for me not to fuck with your hair,” jindallae begins, continuing his hand’s motions before he pauses; settling his palm delicately on the back of the other’s head, kneading into his scalp soothingly. “it’s a good look, trust me. the crazier it looks, the better.” maybe it’s the physical contact paired with the fact that both of them just had another round of shots, but them being so close is making jindallae crave more. he’s just unsure if moving too quickly is a good idea or not. mere milliseconds ago, he decided on riding out the whimsical nature between them for as long as he can, but he can’t help but feel a magnetic pull towards him—one that’s enchanting and powerful; herculean.
“you’re, uh…” jindallae begins, then stifles a laugh, “you’re really gorgeous, matty.” he adds, his hand still present on the smaller’s head. deciding to go for it, he leans in and presses their lips together; sealing them in their first kiss of the evening—letting it linger for awhile before pulling back to gauge the mood that swathes them. their faces are short centimeters away in distance, and he waits for the green light—not wanting to add more passion to his movements until matty surrenders himself.
matty made a noise of half-hearted protest when jin reached forward to mess up his hair once more. admittedly it felt kind of soothing to have someone else playing with his hair. even though matty had spent nearly twenty minutes just try to get his mane to actually look tousled without being messy. his hair was hard to school into some semblance of order. but he couldn’t really be that mad at jin. it wasn’t like matty was all that vain to begin with. and if the way jin kept flirting with him was any indication his hair probably wouldn’t matter by the end of the night.
“maybe you just like teasing me.” matty said in response. he was going for light as it had been earlier in the night, but it came out a little too breathless to be considered light. but then jin was right in his personal space and matty wasn’t quite sure how to deal with that. now that they were so close it was hard not to notice how the light caught in jin’s eyes, or the light mole on the side of his nose. matty would be lying if he said he didn’t consider jin to be very attractive. he was distracted and so barely registered the compliment jin had given him. he was even more surprised when jin leaned in and kissed him. rather chaste for what matty expected but enough that he somewhat mourned when jin pulled back.
he didn’t move for a moment, unsure if he wanted to break the spell or not. “you can kiss me better than that.” he said softly. and then he leaned forward to seal their lips together once again.
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bematthew · 2 years ago
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noelxbe​:
finally
           he’d expected life to calm down after next gen, but it hadn’t really. he was still a student, he was now a trainee too, and though he’d quit some of his jobs, he was still working. still though, it felt more calm than during next gen. during the show noel had been so stressed, using his every second on improving himself, and though he was still trying his best to better-ing his dance skills, he didn’t feel as pressured about it anymore, there were no eliminations this time around. but as he still had lots of things to do, he still wanted to catch up with his friends. he hadn’t really seen anyone besides the participants and coaches during next gen, and he was curious to what his friends had been up to in his time gone.
“oh but i want to pay for you! i promise you it’s no problem” he sends a smile to the shorter. “the summer is coming around, any plans for the season?” though noel now had an even more packed schedule, he was still excited for summer, going swimming outside, nice long walks and beach volleyball, he’s sure his dog too is excited, his dog being just as happy for swimming as noel is. “ah! you know, i adopted a cat some months ago, she hadn’t seen that particularly happy for me besides when i gave her food. during the show my parents babysitted her, and when we finally saw again she came and was all cuddly and let me pet her for long” he smiles “not sure if she missed me or just forgot she hates me” he shrugs.
“okay, okay. you can pay.” matty relented easily. he had some money but he probably should be saving while he tried to figure out what he was doing with his summer. it was getting really close. in past years matty had gone back home for summer break and worked in his parents’ restaurant but he didn’t think he wanted to do that this year. but that left the question of what exactly he was going to do for money. he could always try doing delivery, heard it paid alright.
“usually i go home but i think i want to go home over winter break instead so i’ve gotta find a job.” matty said.  “but other than that i’m not sure, maybe visit some dance workshops.” he wasn’t entirely what seoul was like over the summer, he usually only was there briefly before he went home. and usually it was before the worst of the seoul summer temperatures hit. he laughed when noel detailed his changing relationship with his cat. “i’m sure she missed you!” he said cheerfully. “you were gone for a long time. i’m sure she’ll go back to her old self in no time.”
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bematthew · 2 years ago
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noelxbe​:
finally
          next gen had brought a lot of surprises, and not just for noel. noel had joined and sucked totally ass, he kept ranking lowest and still somehow he managed to survive the eliminations, and not just did he survive the eliminations, but he made it to the final and got a contract offered. already from the beginning had noel been surprised when he saw the fellow participants, and that he already knew a few. noel had unconsciously kind of just stuck around the people he already knew, with how hard he was practicing, he didn’t have much time to go around and make new friends. but seeing a few fellow faces, he had hoped for being able to perform together with them (besides the my turn performance), and as he had gotten the chance to perform with seojun and junho, he had not gotten the opportunity to have a performance with matthew ( @bematthew ).
matthew was very skilled, and had very well deserved his high rankings, and it was a shame when the other got eliminated due to an injury. as noel usually was quite the social butterfly, he’d during next gen been too busy to interact with anyone but the fellow participants, coaches and his sister. he feels a bit bad he hasn’t really had contact with matthew since the other’s elimination, he’s just been so busy himself. “i’ll pay for anything you want” he sends the other a smile, who he has finally seen again as they meet at an café. “i wanna know what you’ve done the last few months! is your injury better?”.
matty was proud of what noel had managed to achieve while he was on next gen. going from the bottom of the rankings to shooting up to the top and securing a contract. but that didn’t mean that he wasn’t slightly jealous of it. matty had rearranged everything in his life to fit around next gen and because he managed to injure himself he got sent home early. he understood the reasoning of course. it was safer to send him away less of a liability to the show and all. but he still wished that he’d been able to avoid his fate somehow even though logically he knew there was nothing he could have done.
matty shook his head when noel offered to pay for anything. “no, it’s fine you don’t need to pay for me i have some money.” he said quickly. when noel mentioned his injury matty couldn’t help but slump a little bit. “my shoulder’s fine.” he said. there was a little debate in his head about whether or not he should answer what he had been up to or not. the debate was won when he decided that not telling noel wouldn’t garner him a great reaction either. “i haven’t been up to anything really. i caught a stomach bug or something a while ago and missed more class. so i think my instructors might kill me if i ask to take any more time off.” matty explained trying to keep his voice light.
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bematthew · 2 years ago
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jindallaebe​:
jindallae’s friends often judge him for being overly indulgent when it comes to flirtation, casual trysts, and one-off flings. they claim that he’s addicted to attractive people, and while there’s some arguable truth to that statement, a more honest description of his antics is that he loathes being alone. being only in the company of himself, and his intrusive thoughts, brings him nothing but misery—his mind often traveling into grim, destructive territory whenever he has nothing to keep him distracted. sure, alcohol helps him get out of that headspace, but a negative side effect of it is that his emotions peak whenever he’s drunk, so he lays off of that as much as possible. music is another way for him to escape, but he’s finding that even that gets boring lately. what never fails him, though, is being in the presence of a person he deems adorable. there’s a special kind of high he gets when he can make them giggle, and smile, and moan, and tonight, he’s sitting pretty at a good place; a blissful contact buzz infiltrating his system from the physical affection. 
per usual, his charms are bewitching his temporary lover—the effervescence that beams from matty’s being bathing jindallae in a light that rivals the sun. it’s powerful, and warm, and it’s a welcome change to the frigid chill he often swathes himself in.
holding onto matty firmly, jindallae curls into him. “don’t worry—if your shoulder hurts, i’ll kiss it better,” he teases, then winks slyly. “that was lame, i know…” though, before he’s able to make anymore bad jokes, he finds himself laughing at the other’s question. shrugging, jin licks over his lips. “i can think of lots of things we can get up to, but we can save those for later. for now, i’ll get you a shot,” he gently tears himself away from his guest, standing. “don’t miss me too much…” chuckling at himself, he ambles to the kitchen, which is still in eye-and-ear-view of the living room, and pours up two minuscule glasses full of soju—peach soju, to be specific. when they’re prepared, he makes his way back to the couch; settling himself back onto it.
“bottoms up!” he half-exclaims, raising his drink in a cheers motion before downing it in one swift swig; the burn of it alighting his tastebuds. with that, he sets his glass on the coffee table, then finally focuses back on matty. “you’re lookin’ good tonight, by-the-way. i like what you’ve done with your hair.” playfully, he reaches forward and ruffles his date’s locks; tousling them. “it looks cute when it’s messy like that.”
matty laughed when jin pulled him in closer to promise he’d kiss his shoulder better if it started hurting. “maybe i’ll hold you to it. don’t make promises you can’t keep and all.” he said lightly. though honestly the idea of jin kissing his shoulder to make it better wasn’t one that matty could really summon to his mind. now kissing in general? matty could absolutely see that. had seen it before actually. he knew exactly how jin operated and he was letting himself be drawn into the charm because he couldn’t think of a good reason to resist it.
matty rolled his eyes as jin got up and cautioned him not to miss him too much. “i’ll be waiting with bated breath.” he responded teasingly. matty shifted on the couch tucking his legs up underneath him as he waited for jin to return. when he did matty found himself leaning against jin once again accepting the shot glass and downing it quickly. the sweet taste of the peach covered the bitter flavor of the alcohol but didn’t do anything to mask the burn.
when he finished he set the glass on the table by jin’s. matty playfully swatted at jin’s hands. “don’t mess up my hair.” he said but the laughter in his voice told an entirely different story about how much matty actually cared about his hair. he had been growing it out, finding that he liked how it looked when it was just slightly shaggy. he’d also dyed his hair back to his original color, afraid that more bleaching would cause too much damage to his hair for him to grow it out.
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bematthew · 2 years ago
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behaein​:
“yeah, you’re right. it’s always easy to return to what you’ve already done though, you know what i mean?” another groan leaves her lips as she digs her face into the palms of her hands. she has to rub out the fatigue from her temples as she looks down at her drink in front of her. it’s pretty much gone at this point, but she doesn’t feel like ordering another one so she just downs the glass of water that was served first.
she’s mid-gulp when matthew begins talking about vocal lessons, and she quickly wipes the water from her mouth to listen more closely. “really? i think they’re worth a try if you can, you know, afford it.” the latter comes out in a bit of a whisper because she realizes it can be a sensitive issue. vocal lessons were not cheap, and the own money she makes from her part-time jobs always go into her lessons. “but if you don’t feel like going for lessons, youtube videos are like super advanced these days.” it’s kind of a joke, but it’s also not. haein’s learned that they’re a pretty good tool for beginners. 
“have you considered any other lessons? i know someone who took acting lessons because they heard that it helps with emotions during singing.” that was actually pretty common with idol-to-be’s, and it reminds her of all the different lessons she took back as a trainee. “not that i’m saying you should take those, but you never know what’ll help. right?”
matty nodded slightly. he could definitely relate to that. he often found himself going back to things that were familiar not even because he liked them that much but because they were familiar. it had been how he coped with homesickness for a while. finding something familiar in a largely unfamiliar city. “sometimes change is good though.” he said. although he wondered how well he even heeded his own advice.
he used the straw to stir his drink slightly feeling a little nervous. “i’d have to actually look at the prices.” he didn’t know if he could afford it. but he also didn’t know if he could actually fit it into his schedule. he spent a lot of time in the studio thanks to his major. but that also meant that matty didn’t have a lot of time for much else. in fact he got most of his spending money from teaching various dance workshops because he hadn’t really had time for a steady job this last semester. “but if i can learn stuff from youtube maybe that’s the better place to start?”
he hesitated for a moment. he didn’t know what would help in his quest to be scouted. maybe acting would give him that edge that he was looking for. maybe he needed to just be better in all areas. “i don’t know.” he admitted sinking down until his chin was resting on the table. “it feels so hopeless sometimes.”
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bematthew · 2 years ago
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behaein​:
she understand where matthew’s coming from because she’s sitting on a similar boat. of course, she’s two years younger, but even she knows she may be cutting it close. there were idols so much younger than her debuting and if she did ever get a chance now, she’ll probably end up being the oldest. 
trying her best not to let out another huff of frustration, she takes a sip of the drink in front of her instead. “well, one of them i ended up good terms, the other,” she leaves it hanging with a shrug. while she enjoyed most of her time at the movie theater, she was aware her jerk manager was still there, so she was contemplating if she should return or not.
“i should probably take up more vocal lessons or something.” she winces once more at the painful memory, but she’s got to get over it. “i was too focused on my dancing but i wasn’t even a trainee anymore! i should have been allowed to enjoy whatever skill i was working on,” she explains even though matthew hasn’t even said anything. it was more so that she had to let it out some way.
matty nodded as haein explained her situation. “if it was bad enough to leave like that maybe just ask for the one back and see if you can get a new job? it’s probably not worth getting it back anyway.” matty wasn’t entirely sure if that was the way to go. but it seemed to him that it was better to not waste one’s time in a job where they didn’t like the people. he’d had a few jobs here and there however he had to be careful about how many hours he worked due to the limitations on his current visa.
when haein mentioned vocal lessons matty thought for a minute. maybe that was something he should try too. next gen had been the first time he’d really tried something like that seriously. and the judges had been relatively kind to him about his inexperience. “i thought about taking vocal lessons.” matty admitted. “i kinda know how to sing but it’s not anything i really gave effort to learn in the past.”
he wondered if he would have made it much further if his injury hadn’t taken him out of consideration. he wasn’t even sure how many elimination rounds there were. he’d been trying not to watch otherwise he felt like he might just burn up from the jealousy.
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bematthew · 2 years ago
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matty loses his voice and more time in practice. wc: 381
matty wasn’t entirely thrilled when the doctor recommended he take a few days off classes. again. maybe stretching himself so thin over the course of next gen had caused him to get sick. but then he figured it would have happened closer to when he was actually on the show. regardless matty had taken the note to his instructors somewhat reluctantly. he had missed so much time already and now he was missing more because he was sick.
but by the third day of the cold matty was feeling like even if he had tried to make to class he wouldn’t have been useful there. especially because his voice had all but entirely disappeared. he hated it because he never realized before how much he talked until he couldn’t bring himself to speak above a whisper.
it was utterly frustrating. especially when he was trying to get his roommate to bring home some cough drops and tea for him when he went out. matty ended up just texting him what he wanted because trying to have a conversation when he couldn’t raise his voice to make himself more intelligible was too hard. he ended up pouting a bit the rest of the day unable to focus on much except his own pure physical discomfort.
by the time the cold was winding down matty was just thinking about how much time he’d missed out of his classes and how much more work it would take to get himself back on track. he felt like he was just rotting in his apartment not doing much at all. but there wasn’t much more to do but just wait it out. matty binged his way through several tv shows feeling more and more upset about the time he was losing.
by the time he finally got the okay to go back to classes he was sure that he was going to go crazy if he had to stick it out for one more day at home. he dragged himself through his classes trying his best to catch up on everything he’d missed over the past few days but he knew it was going to take a lot of extra work on his part to get everything back up to where he wanted it to be.
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bematthew · 2 years ago
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the first morning, you wake up with just the slightest unusual itch in your throat. it could be absolutely nothing, just a change in humidity overnight causing the irritation. you don’t think twice about it as you go about your day.
it gets worse as the day goes on, a slight cough tickling your chest. but you feel fine, maybe a little tired, but nothing worse than a slight cold. you throw on a mask and promise to take your temperature as soon as you can, just to be sure.
the next morning there’s no denying it; you’re sick. it’s not that bad, but you go to the doctor anyway just to make sure it’s nothing serious. after a swab, they assure you that it’s just the common cold, a viral infection that should clear itself up in a week or so. they send you home with a note excusing you from work or classes and making you promise to call right back if anything changes.
it’s the third day when the worst happens: you lose your voice entirely.
talking doesn’t hurt, it’s not like you’re dealing with strep throat. but a bad case of laryngitis seems to have come with whatever cold you caught. you can hardly do anything more than whisper softly. unfortunately, even if you call the doctor, there’s nothing they can do to bring your voice back any sooner. they just recommend tea and honey and tell you to take it easy as you recover.
the bulk of your cold is over by day five; the fever breaks, the cough has almost entirely stopped, and your energy is slowly coming back to you. it’s not until day seven that your voice finally returns as well.
you’re given the go-ahead to return to work or classes the next day. you just can’t help but wonder how much you’ve missed out on in a week.
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bematthew · 2 years ago
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jindallaebe​:
[  🥀  ]  𝖘𝖚𝖓𝖘𝖍𝖎𝖓𝖊 // 𝖒𝖎𝖉𝖓𝖎𝖌𝖍𝖙 𝖗𝖆𝖎𝖓.
𝖙𝖑𝖉𝖗 /  JIN ACTS QUESTIONABLY, LIKE ALWAYS. 🙄 A CLOSED STARTER WRITTEN FOR MATTY LUONG !
it’s needless to say that jindallae’s been feeling restless lately. it seems like, every time he has a night off, he can’t remain peacefully at home. his limbs ache with a need to move, his skin burns with a desire to be touched, and his gut flutters with a sense of anxiety that he often suppresses with alcohol. it’s a never-ending cycle of motion that he’s subscribed to, even if he wishes that remaining idle was easier for him to do. he has consoles at home that are actively collecting dust and work-in-progress raps that have gone unfinished for weeks, on top of many other means of solitary entertainment, but instead of diving into them or catching up on rest, he neglects it all in order to seek pleasure. hedonism doesn’t even begin to describe it.
in fact, he’d consider that a morbid understatement. throughout this, though, what jin’s failing to realize is that this growing dependence on cheap thrills, wild chaos, and constant action is creating a wicked pattern of self-destruction; one that he’s unable to put a name on for the time being. remaining blissfully ignorant to everything he’s doing wrong seems to be working in his favor, for right now anyway, so he’s good…
… or is he?
nevertheless, he’s set his sights on a pretty someone for the night, and although he knows that reaching out to this person privately is likely to start fires at home, he’s decided not to care. jin’s a simple man. he sees a guy he likes, and he goes for it. no beating around the bush, no games (for the most part)—just a union of two beings becoming one for a small period of time. what’s the harm in that? that, and honestly speaking, matty seemed eager to respond to his advances—apparently needing some sort of “pick-me-up” after a recent failure of his got him feeling low. jindallae would be an asshole not to help him out in some way, right? that’s what he’s telling himself, and as he cozies up next to matty on the couch, he smirks; draping a strong arm around his shoulders to pull him in closer, obviously craving the physical contact.
“does this hurt?” he asks, mindful of his guest’s injury. “let me know if i need to readjust. i don’t wanna cause you any discomfort or anything.” his posture becomes languid, relaxed, and his head is turned so he can shower matty in undivided attention. “it’s nice havin’ you here without mimi around. i’ve always wanted to chill with you—just us.” the smirk from earlier grows into a proper grin now, his tongue swiping over his lips after. “you want anything to drink? got some beer in the fridge, some soju, too, as well as a sparkling juice blend in case you wanna stay sober.”
matty knew that jin was dangerous. jin practically wore a sign that hung around his neck saying “bad boy”. he could scream it through a megaphone and it would be less obvious. and well, matty had heard stories via his friend about jin. he wasn’t stupid. but he was feeling pretty down on himself and a little bit insecure and even though jin was the very stereotype of the kind of boy you shouldn’t bring home to your parents matty found himself responsive to jin’s flirtations all the same. maybe it was because it offered an easy distraction.
jin pulled matty close and matty allowed it taking in the physical affection greedily. “hmm no this is fine.” matty said leaning further into the other male. “just be careful of jostling it.” for the most part his injury was almost fully healed up. but his shoulder was still a bit stiff near his neck. as far as matty knew that would clear up pretty quickly anyway. probably just a few more days and all it would be was a haunting memory of him falling on national tv after making his name as a “good dancer”.
“is there something you want to do that you can’t do when mimi is here?” matty asked, he knew full well what jindallae meant. but well, it was kind of fun to tease him a bit. matty wasn’t innocent by any stretch of the imagination but he wasn’t exactly don juan either. when jin mentioned drinks matty thought for a second before deciding to throw a little caution to the wind. “soju doesn’t sound bad.”
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bematthew · 2 years ago
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behaein​:
it was almost bizarre just how much haein’s life had changed in the couple of days since her elimination. having gone from a full schedule of training, practicing and rehearsing to returning to a regular citizen was odd. she had quit her part-time jobs to participate in the show, and she wasn’t sure how to go back to her regular life, which was odd considering that she didn’t even spend much time on next gen.
the elimination had brought back memories of being dropped from her ex-company’s debut lineup. it was like haein was going through another failure, and she hated it. “with the schedules they put us in, i’m not surprised you went through an injury,” she says with a slight smile. they barely got any time to sleep, but haein thought it would all be worth it when she made it. too bad she didn’t get to get that far. 
“well, i’m probably going to have to text my manager again to ask if i can get my part-time job again. though, it’ll be weird to return to collecting tickets and serving people popcorn,” she admits with a shrug. “the good thing is that now i know what i’m lacking in. once i save the money, i’ll probably enroll in more vocal lessons.” she cringes upon thinking of her voice crack once again before letting out a groan. “we’ll figure it out, don’t you think so?” she has no doubt matthew will. this was more in reference to haein questioning herself.
matty sighed deflating a bit. “i wish i hadn’t.” he hated being injured in normal circumstances. but having his embarrassment be aired for the whole nation to see? he’d rather just move back to chicago and pretend it never happened. “it feels like i was just getting started and now i wasted my time with this.” he admitted glumly. “and it’s not like i have much time left, i feel like i’m getting too old to be scouted at this rate...”
“i’m glad i was able to rearrange my classes. i don’t know what i would be doing if i didn’t have some kind of distraction.” matty said. “hopefully you can get your job back. i don’t see why not if you parted on good terms at least.” he said hopefully. “i’m sure that you can get back on the horse. you did really well on the show.” well other than the unfortunate vocal crack but it wasn’t like matty could judge much there.
“yeah, we’ll definitely figure it out, i’m ure.” matty said feigning perhaps a little more confidence than he actually felt.
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bematthew · 2 years ago
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behaein​:
♡ ˙ ˖ ✧ — @bematthew
not to sound cocky or anything, but haein’s still a little taken aback about her elimination. this isn’t her saying that anybody else deserved to get eliminated in her place, but she had been placed so high that it didn’t seem super possible. however, of course, television programs were weird and anything was bound to happen, especially with how she messed up that note. 
nevertheless, she’s trying her best to think positive. it gave her a good experience, and she came out with a few more friends, and one of them was matthew. he, unfortunately, had a similar fate to herself as they both found themselves eliminated in the same round. it was a bummer because she thinks he was great, but she could say that about pretty much all the participants. there really was nobody deserving of an elimination.
haein’s still a bit bitter, upset, mad at herself, but she’s trying her best to get over it all. it’s why she’s sitting across matthew at a small little cafe, stirring her straw in the iced vanilla latte she decided to get. “so, what have you been up to since the elimination?” she was a bit embarrassed, but she hasn’t done much but re-live every moment of her last performance and screaming into her pillow, so she was curious to know how he was coping.
he wasn’t exactly doing well after his elimination. matty felt like he’d done a good job and then left on the most pathetic note possible. and the worst part was it only took another day or two after his elimination to be pretty much back to full capacity. matty almost hadn’t wanted to go back to attending his classes normally. but he had eventually gotten himself back into a normal schedule.
in general he was trying to just move forward. even if he felt upset about the way that the chips had fallen for him. at the very least he’d come out of the experience with more friends than he’d started with. and he could commiserate with one in particular at the moment. haein had been knocked out of the competition at the same time as he had. he was happy at least to get closer to her, new friends were always welcome in matty’s book.
“mostly just going to my classes.” matty responded absently stirring the iced americano he’d bought. “i had to take a short break from studio classes to let my shoulder heal up. but i guess i’m back in the saddle.” matty was glad that it hadn’t taken too much time to get back up to speed with his studio classes though. he’d always been a fast learner. he’d half worried that re-arranging his schedule so much for the filming was going to affect his grades. but so far everything had been going pretty well. “what about you?”
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bematthew · 2 years ago
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matty reflects on his salute performance mentions: stevie park wc: 526
you injured yourself pretty early on, can you talk a little bit about that situation?
matty knew they would ask about it but he still felt himself get a little bit flustered. he was still a little embarrassed about the whole thing, especially because the injury was pretty mild. “i was embarrassed honestly. and i still am. it was a pretty rookie mistake.” he admitted and cleared his throat. “and mistakes are normal for dancing when you’re first learning it, even falling is pretty normal. but everyone had been so kind and full of flattery about my dance skills i guess i felt like i couldn’t make any mistakes even in practice.” he hesitated for a second. “it was honestly pretty brutal trying to balance practice time and letting my shoulder fully heal. my shoulder’s still is a little bit stiff and i think it showed a bit in the floor work portion which is a shame because it was my favorite part of the dance. but i was really determined not to let my teammates down and i was satisfied with the rest of my performance.”
how do you feel your team did in terms of chemistry?
matty grinned. “i think we did really well. the four of us worked really well together.” he said proudly. “i wondered if it was maybe cheating to have stevie on our team since a few of us already knew him before. but he was really invaluable for us.” he really thought that stevie and sarang had carried the atmosphere of the team. after all half the work had been done because stevie was friends with most of them so it was easy to just click with each other. “he even helped me when i fell in practice and i’m glad that he was there.”
how do you feel about your current ranking?
matty hummed thinking for a long moment. “i anticipated falling in the ranks but i was pleasantly surprised to see i didn’t fall out of the top ten. i was really thankful to the judges and the coaches for helping me with this new challenge. this is the first time i’ve really tried anything like this. and even if i don’t win i want to go home having learned something, you know?” he explained. “so i guess i’m mildly disappointed about falling but it only makes me want to work harder. i want to live up to all the nice things the judges have said about me.”
are you worried about the eliminations?
matty considered the question for a long moment. “yes and no?” he said sounding a bit unsure even to himself. “i still feel like there’s so much more to learn from this opportunity.” he wasn’t in the bottom ranks at the moment but matty didn’t think that particularly meant he was safe. “i would just hate to go home early and miss out learning something from the coaches because i put out a less than satisfactory performance. but i think i’ve at least proven why i’m here to myself and to others.”
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bematthew · 2 years ago
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matty performs salute with stevie park, yeom sarang and moon saea. reference: salute wc: 558
matty’s shoulder was still a bit stiff and he knew that would affect his performance. he’d done his best to warm up before the performance hoping to mitigate it as much as possible. it was d-day after all he had to work with where he was and not where he wanted to be. he got into position for the beginning of the song taking a few deep breaths and shaking his limbs to get rid of the nerves.
he would do well. so well the judges wouldn’t even be able to tell that he injured himself. when the music started matty switched immediately into performance mode. the song was a good one. and he thought the choreography they had been given was good too. it had been a real joy to learn it. and he wanted to do it justice.
and maybe it was a bit easier to learn when he had such good teammates. working with stevie was nothing new to him. though seeing a new more serious side of the other had been a bit of a surprise. saea being the female center had been almost a little intimidating for matty but they’d gotten along surprisingly well. and he could really say that he thought saea had brought out some of the best sides of their team. and then of course sarang with all his flirty behavior and his invaluable help in helping matty with the best way to express their song. he thought they had all clicked surprisingly well.
let me hear you say, ladies all across the world we’re looking for recruits. matty had worked on this part a thousand times in order to get this part right even after his fall. they passed through the part where he’d fallen with no hitches, his timing was right on point and he didn’t overbalance himself this time. with that part out of the way matty felt like he’d redeemed himself after falling on camera. 
they went into the floor work section fairly soon after that. and the first part was a little hard, supporting all his body weight on one hand with an injured shoulder was difficult and matty could feel his arm shaking a bit. but he focused on sarang’s advice emulating the smirk and wink that sarang had suggested while keeping a steady gaze on the judges. luckily enough the floor work section was over pretty quickly and matty hadn’t fallen over during it. he knew it was likely his weakest section technically thanks to his injured shoulder, though.
and after that there was only the dance break which matty had really enjoyed learning. if he put a little bit of renewed energy into the dance break it was only because he wanted to end on a strong note. it was all that he could do since he couldn’t go back and re-do the previous section with a magically healed shoulder.
salute, salute. matty hit the final salute pose being sure to make strong eye contact with the judges.he really loved performing, it was something he’d always known about himself. however, he’d really just begun to realize how intoxicating it was to be on stage and have everyone’s eyes on him through the show. he thought it would be a real shame if he ended up going home so early. so he hoped he at least showed that he could adapt to hardship well.
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bematthew · 2 years ago
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sarangbe​:
sarang can’t help himself—he loves seeing a handsome guy blush, and so far, matty’s been an easy target. there’s a giddiness that fuels him whenever he witnesses the apples of his cheeks sprout roses, and all he can hope is that matty won’t resent him too much for leaning into the flirtation a little more. they’ve already created one moment that has the potential to be viral, so why not add more to their repertoire? that’s his point of view, anyway. he’ll have to remember to bring this up with him later, but for now, his assistance is being asked for, and he’s thrilled at the prospect.
however, right after he makes a mental note to bring this up to his cohort later, he gets a wink sent back to him, and all he can do is beam in his direction; laughing audibly. “what do you mean you’re having a hard time with expressions?” he counters, nudging his arm with his hand. “looks like you’ve got the vibe right to me, but if my help is what you’d like, then who am i to say no? you’ve been a big help to me already, and well, there is more that i could use your help with, but we can address that later. for now, let’s see what we can do to boost your expressions!” all of this is incredibly flattering to him, and he wants so badly to help matty out, too.
“you said you were doing the floor work? that’s one of my favorite parts of the song. i love that the choreography for it is pretty sensual and graceful, but the lyrics that accompany those parts are really strong. in my opinion, that means you can add both elements to your face.” getting onto the floor, he pats the spot next to him so matty can join him. “the first part of says ‘if you think we’re just pretty things, you couldn’t be more wrong.’ here, i would say, there’s a mischievousness you can add to your look. like, on the ‘you couldn’t be more wrong’ line, i think it’d be fun to wink, and slowly allow a smile to tug at your lips, while your eyes are locked into the camera. kind of like…” with that, he pretty masterfully does what he describes.
“i like to think of the lyrics and try to match they’re conveying. what do you think they’re conveying, and how do you think you can show that on your face?”
matty shrugged a little bit. he wasn’t entirely sure what his problem was either. the bridge was soft and sensual almost hypnotizing. the movements themselves were fine but matty knew there was a slight disconnect between his body language and his facial expression. he didn’t usually have such an issue with it but maybe he had been a bit thrown off by his injury.
he took a seat next to sarang easily. “i think i just look angry when i try it.” matty said. which wasn’t entirely wrong he supposed. the song was supposed to be a girl power anthem. which was funny given the makeup of their team only included one girl. so he supposed being treated as a “pretty thing” as the lyrics said would be pretty anger-inducing. but the melody was soft and lush there like a snake slipping and sliding through the tall grass.
matty demonstrated how he had been doing it. his face was a little hard and intense. even as he tried to incorporate sarang’s advice. sexy wasn’t ever really matty’s forte. he’d done it before, he’d done a lot of things before. but even he knew that he shined the most when it came to more bubbly pop songs or intense broody ones. being more sensual and seductive was something that he’d always had to work on. and he wanted to show that he could do this concept as easily as any other.
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bematthew · 2 years ago
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bexstevie​:
giggling at matthew, he elbows back in response, staggering into him lightly with a laugh as he gives him a quick one armed hug. “thank you~!” he sing songs, pulling away so he can go back to position. 
there’s always parts of the dance they’re going to have to work more on. whether it be skill, timing or general just until it feels right. stevie does it with loose limbs, because he doesn’t want to over-exert himself for when saea and sarang get here so they can do it all through again. 
stevie’s focused, for the most part. expression focused as he watches their movement in the mirror. he mostly focuses on how his body looks in timing with matty’s– which it’s good. stevie can’t really notice a moment of them being out of sync or off in time. so when matty begins to fall back, stevie’s eyes are on it instantly– momentarily stunned as he spins around with a, “whoa, whoa!”
he’s at matty’s side in an instant, hands hovering and twitching– because that sounded like a harsh enough fall to knock the wind out of you. “are you okay?” he rushes out, english slipping through in his worry. he’s careful to not touch or jostle. “that was rough. did you hit your head? can you breathe?” he rushes out in mild panic; his first aid kit is still in his bag, so he’s got some things, but if it’s bad enough he’s going to have to find a coach or a staff member. “can you move?”
“i didn’t hit my head.” matty responded still a little winded. he didn’t want to sit up until he was sure that he was okay so he laid there and just took stock of everything that was hurting. mostly it was the shoulder he’d landed on but there were a few other various small aches. “that hurt.” he said with a weak laugh. “i think i’m okay.” or at least not injured enough that he would have to drop out or something. “i’m gonna sit up,” he said.
being careful not to lean on his injured side he managed to get into a sitting position. “i fell on my left shoulder.” he explained. “otherwise i think i’m okay.” granted he wasn’t an expert. but matty had been injured before and if he had to rate his injuries this one was on the lower end of injuries. he’d hurt himself far worse doing an improper lift.
he sighed softly hiding his face once he felt himself blushing. “they’re gonna put that on tv.” he said in english into his hands. he was absolutely sure that the cameramen were doing everything they could to document this moment. exactly how many times could one be embarrassed on national television before they disappeared in utter shame?
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bematthew · 2 years ago
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sarangbe​:
“your dance style did not suit the choreography at all. if you’re going to debut in a group someday, you need to be able to mold yourself to the concept.”
it was a critique murmured by yoojung—arguably his favorite judge overseeing him and the other contestants—and since it was verbalized to him, it won’t leave his head. he understands it loud and clear; comprehends exactly what his senior is telling him to do, and it makes perfect sense. however, what he’s having a hard time grappling with is how to pull it off; how to show them that he’s listening and retaining everything they’re telling him. the song that he and his team have been given is fun, and he adores that it blends sensuality with power in a way that’s harmonious, and while he knows he won’t have any issue with his expressions, or the performance aspect of it, he’s nervous that he’ll lack the strength they want to see from him. so, as he stands before the mirror in the dance studio he’s practicing in, he attempts a section of the choreography; his careful eyes watching his limbs as they move, unsure how to get them to carry more tension instead of fluidity, and grace.
as he’s wracking his brain, he hears a voice call his name, and as he turns his head to greet the individual in question, he sees that it’s matty, and right away, a bright sunbeam of a smile is aimed in his direction; casting light and warmth. “wait—you need my help?” he asks, puzzled. “i wasn’t expecting that, but oh my gosh, yeah! i’ll totally lend a hand! i’ll do anything for you…” his voice is a teasing lilt, and all he can do is hope that whatever advice he gives is deemed useful somehow.
“what part are you having an issue with?”
matty smiled back at sarang easily. even if his face felt a little warm when sarang employed a bit of a flirting. he always got a bit flustered when sarang decided to do that. he expected that fans would like these kind of flirtatious interactions. but that didn’t mean he’d be any less embarrassed about being called out on national tv about getting flustered.
“i was doing the floor work. and i think i have the motions down but i don’t think i’m getting the right vibe expression wise.” he explained as he got to his feet. “you seem to know what you’re doing there so i wanted a professional opinion.” he winked when he said professional. there he was feeding into it but oh well might as well own it.
“if you need help with anything i can help you too.” matty offered. he hadn’t really been watching the rest of them. he’d been too focused on ironing out the kinks in his own performance. but he figured that it was still polite to at least offer to help out.
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