behkawa

[behkawa]

just read “to be loved is to be worth the inconvenience” it blew my mind away

[behkawa]

Waiting is not a sign of weakness but a test of faith. Trust in Allah, for His timing is always perfect, and what is meant for you will come in ways greater than you imagined.

[behkawa]

[behkawa]

@jenpeters_soulguide_healer

[behkawa]

btw you will miss this in 5 or 10 years. memory will smooth these circumstances down like a river stone, and you will find yourself longing for a shade of light or a moment of this particular innocence. you don't know about what happens next, and one day that will be the most alluring thing of all. don't leave it all for nostalgia. have a nice night now, whatever night it happens to be.

[behkawa]

- “سيفتح الله باباً كنت تحسبه من شدة اليأس لم يخلق بمفتاح.”

- 𝑨𝒍𝒍𝒂𝒉 𝒘𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒐𝒑𝒆𝒏 𝒂 𝒅𝒐𝒐𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒅𝒆𝒔𝒑𝒆𝒓𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒍𝒚 𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒖𝒈𝒉𝒕 𝒏𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒏 𝒉𝒂𝒅 𝒂 𝒌𝒆𝒚.

[behkawa]

"يُعطيك الله قبلَ أن تسأل، ويُعطيك وأنتَ تسأل، ويُعطيك دونَ أن تسأل."

“Allah gives you before you ask, and gives you while you are asking, and gives you without you asking.”

[behkawa]

no one quite psychoanalyzes like daughters do when looking at their mothers

[behkawa]

اک پل کا قرب ایک برس کا پھر انتظار

آئی ہے جنوری تو دسمبر چلا گیا

رخسار ناظم آبادی

[behkawa]

GETTING OLDER IS CRAZY CAUSE YOU JUST START THINKING DIFFERENTLY OUT OF NOWHERE

[behkawa]

اللهم ابعد عنا من ينظرالينا ويترقبنا ويتحسدنا واحفضنا يالله من كيد كل حاسد وفاسد واجعل كيدهم في نحرهم يارب

[behkawa]

file -> phrases that are going to shift something in me forever

[behkawa]

[behkawa]

well i want someone to talk to 24/7 to drag around and go places with me and maybe it’s codependency mixed with desire but i just want someone to stick with me for life

[behkawa]

Not that anybody asked, but I think it's important to understand how shame and guilt actually work before you try to use it for good.

It's a necessary emotion. There are reasons we have it. It makes everything so. much. worse. when you use it wrong.

Shame and guilt are DE-motivators. They are meant to stop behavior, not promote it. You cannot, ever, in any meaningful way, guilt someone into doing good. You can only shame them into not doing bad.

Let's say you're a parent and your kid is having issues.

Swearing in class? Shame could work. You want them to stop it. Keep it in proportion*, and it might help. *(KEEP IT IN PROPORTION!!!)

Not doing their homework? NO! STOP! NO NOT DO THAT! EVER! EVER! EVER! You want them to start to do their homework. Shaming them will have to opposite effect! You have demotivated them! They will double down on NOT doing it. Not because they are being oppositional, but because that's what shame does!

You can't guilt people into building better habits, being more successful, or getting more involved. That requires encouragement. You need to motivate for that stuff!

If you want it in a simple phrase:

You can shame someone out of being a bad person, but you can't shame them into being a good person.

[behkawa]

[behkawa]

One must teach himself to live with struggle, not because one wishes to struggle but because struggle is inevitable. Either you encounter it with grace or it will force its way in. It’s also important because the times ahead are not easy; the life you envision or the ranks you wish to attain will not come to you as a piece of cake—it requires struggle. So embrace the struggle already and prepare yourself for the combat. 

As ‘umar bin al-Khattāb said, “Roughen up, for bounties do not last forever.” 

اخشوشنوا فإن النعم لا تدوم