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crow 221

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a deep sea fish encounters an alien

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a sense of longing

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Chonk

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a little late to the party but some sakamichi doodles because it was his birthday 2 days ago!!!!!! march 7 marks this weeb cyclist’s birthday so here he is with all his (boy)friends who love love him so much <3

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Commissions are OPEN!

Send me an email as shown in the last slide, and I will add you to the queue!

✨⭐️✨⭐️✨

Incase you are wondering, I’m opening commissions for several reasons. One being our rent for the apartment went up for the second time since the pandemic began. I have a goal to move up north so my aunt and I can become more eco friendly, to plant our own food and make our own mulch. Saving money is very difficult at this time, but I know I can get ahead with your help!

Every little bit helps!

✨⭐️✨⭐️✨

だいすき、みなさん！

✨⭐️✨⭐️✨

[bee-architect-316413]

This Friday, August 6th 2021

I will be streaming on twitch.tv/NBPup

I’m gonna be playing Toontown Rewritten while promoting the wonderful charities… The Nature Conservancy and Charity Water!

Join me as I level up my laff, play with friends and make new ones… I may talk about my past, I may not talk at all. I’m still new to streaming, after all. Hope to see you there to spread awareness about our climate crisis while having some fun!

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i know i should also not read the asks about climate change but they assure me that ending it soon might not be so bad if at least i won’t have to see everyone suffer and i’m already so tired

yes please don't read them or ruminate on them if they're triggering, they're nothing more than me rambling. must be taken with a massive grain of salt. i don't know the future and definitely not ur future, so don't run with it. i'm probably not gonna answer them for the forseeable because i don't want them to be used for this purpose nd reading this made me realize a lot of mentally ill brains might latch onto the discussion as validation to die which is obviously just not what i want or the intended purpose at all :( very very sorry ur in such a dark place, i do understand (to an extent, i know all pain is unique) and i know how hard it is to keep on going every day. but i really hope you can manage it, while stability and peace is still available to us in this lifetime no matter how chaotic or hard it gets. it's perfectly understandable that you're tired, i don't blame you at all. can't imagine what you've been through on top of just being a person in this world. it is all so so hard, i hope this doesn't come across as me undermining that in any way. i know the effort doesn't feel worth the reward, especially when you're mentally ill. i really hope you're able to seek professional help ASAP or if you already are, that you're able to be honest w your therapist/doctor about the thougts you're having so you can begin to work ob subverting them which btw is very possible. i know there's a lot about living we can't change but at the very least, know that moments where a person is actively suicidal are often brief and transient. it's not built to last and you absolutely can get through it, esp with a support network by your side. even if you can't save the world there is so much resolution and inner peace to be found in terms of therapy, learning how to implement healthier coping mechanisms into your life, being honest w yourself and those around you. i'm not saying it's that easy to solve or that there's an easy fix, i'm just saying this isn't all there is. i know it all seems truly pointless, i know that's a giant part of it. i just hope some day, and i know it's v daunting so please just keep it in consideration if it's too overwhelming for you rn, you can get yourself to go through the motions of finding the support you need anyway, despite how much you want to self destruct. your life has so much inherent worth, you are supposed to be here. it's all just so rare and temporary anyway. those are indisputable statements, no matter what ur brain is telling you. it's possible for the trajectory of your life to be a positive one even in the midst of all this fucking shit, i sincerely believe that for you. you’re not out of options, when you look at what is actually in your hands. people are going to suffer but they are also going to thrive, sometimes all in the same day. please try to stick around to see it. just focus on getting through today above all, even the next hour. the next minute, if that feels like too much. and then just take it from there. sending u so much love, please take care of yourself. x

https://www.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlines

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you’re going to love again, find a job again, create art again, do what you love again, feel powerful again. you’re going to be back on track. i don’t know when, but you are going to feel like yourself again, eventually. this isn’t the end. hang in there.

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Daughters of Darkness (Les lèvres rouges) 1971, dir. Harry Kümel.

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The ninety nine names of Allah :

Allāh (God) الله

Al-Raḥmān (The Gracious) الرَّحْمَن

Al-Raḥīm (The Merciful) الرَّحِيم

Al-Mālik (The Sovereign) الْملك

Al-Qudūs (The Holy) القدوس

Al-Salām (The Peace) السَّلَام

Al-Mu’min (The Faithful) الْمُؤمن

Al-Muhaymin (The Protector) الْمُهَيْمِن

Al-Azīz (The Almighty) الْعَزِيز

Al-Jabbār (The Compeller) الْجَبَّار

Al-Mutakabir (The Supreme)المتكبر

Al-Khāliq (The Creator) الْخَالِق

Al-Bārī (The Makler) البارئ

Al-Muṣawwir (The Fashioner) المصور

Al-Ghaffār (The Forgiving) الْغفار

Al-Qahhār (The Prevailing) القهار

Al-Wahhāb (The Bestower) الْوَهَّاب

Al-Razzāq (The Provider) الرَّزَّاق

Al-Fatāh (The Opener) الفتاح

Al-‘Alīm (The Knowing) الْعَلِيم

Al-Qābiḍ (The Withholder) الْقَابِض

Al-Bāsiṭ (The Extender) الباسط

Al-Khāfiḍ (The Humbler) الْخَافِض

Al-Rāfi’ (The Raiser) الرافع

Al-Mu’iz (The Honorer) المعز

Al-Mudhil (The Humiliater) المذل

Al-Samī’ (The Hearing) السميع

Al-Basīr (The Seeing) البصير

Al-Ḥakam (The Judge) الحكم

Al-‘Adl (The Just) العدل

Al-Laṭīf (The Kind) اللطيف

Al-Khabīr (The Aware) الخبير

Al-Ḥalīm (The Forbearing) الحليم

Al-Aẓīm (The Grand) العظيم

Al-Ghafūr (The Exonerating) الغفور

Al-Shakūr (The Thankful) الشكور

Al-‘Alī (The Most High) العلي

Al-Kabīr (The Greatest) الكبير

Al-Ḥafīẓ (The Preserver) الحفيظ

Al-Muqīt (The Nourisher) المقيت

Al-Ḥasīb (The Reckoner) الحسيب

Al-Jalīl (The Sublime) الجليل

Al-Karīm (The Generous) الكريم

Al-Raqīb (The Watchful) الرقيب

Al-Mujīb (The Answerer) المجيب

Al-Wāsi’ (The Expander) الواسع

Al-Ḥakīm (The Wise) الحكيم

Al-Wadūd (The Loving) الودود

Al-Majīd (The Glorious) المجيد

Al-Bā’ith (The Resurrector) الباعث

Al-Shahīd (The Witness) الشهيد

Al-Ḥaqq (The Truth) الحق

Al-Wakīl (The Trustee) الوكيل

Al-Qawī (The Powerful) القوي

Al-Matīn (The Strong) المتين

Al-Walī (The Defender) الولي

Al-Ḥamīd (The Praiseworthy) الحميد

Al-Muḥṣi (The Accountant) المحصي

Al-Mubdī’ (The Initiator) المبدئ

Al-Mu’īd (The Restorer) المعيد

Al-Muḥyī (The Giver of Life) المحي

Al-Mumīt (The Causer of Death) المميت

Al-Ḥayy (The Living) الحي

Al-Qayūm (The Sustaining) القيوم

Al-Wājid (The Finder) الواجد

Al-Mājid (The Magnificent) الماجد

Al-Wāhid (The One) الواحد

Al-Ṣamad (The Eternal Refuge) الصمد

Al-Qādir (The Able) القادر

Al-Muqtadir (The Determiner) المقتدر

Al-Muqaddim (The Expediter) المقدم

Al-Muakhir (The Delayer) المؤخر

Al-Awwal (The First) الأول

Al-Ākhir (The Last) الآخر

Al-Ẓāhir (The Outward) الظاهر

Al-Bāṭin (The Inward) الباطن

Al-Wāli (The Governer) الوالي

Al-Muta’ālī (The Exalted) المتعالي

Al-Birr (The Righteous) البر

Al-Tawwāb (The Acceptor of Repentance) التواب

Al-Muntaqim (The Avenger) المنتقم

Al-‘Afūw (The Pardoner) العفو

Al-Ra’ūf (The Kind) الرؤوف

Mālik al-Mulk (The King of Kings) مالك الملك

Dhu al-Jalāl wal-Ikrām (The Majestic and Noble) ذو الجلال والإكرام

Al-Muqsiṭ (The Equitable) المقسط

Al-Jāmi’ (The Gatherer) الجامع

Al-Ghanī (The Independent) الغني

Al-Mughnī (The Enricher) المغني

Al-Māni’ (The Preventer) المانع

Al-Ḍārr (The Causer of Harm) الضار

Al-Nāfi’ (The Causer of Benefit) النافع

Al-Nūr (The Light) النور

Al-Hādī (The Guider) الهادي

Al-Badī’ (The Origin) البديع

Al-Bāqi (The Remaining) الباقي

Al-Wārith (The Inheritor) الوارث

Al-Rashīd (The Director) الرشيد

Al-Sabūr (The Patient) الصبور