bearifyme

[bearifyme]

It's gonna be such a funny mess when Donald Trump dies of a stroke on April 1st, 2024.

Naturally everybody will think it's fake because of the date only to lose their minds (both positively and negatively based on their opinion of trump) when realizing it's real

There will be massive celebrations in the streets and on social media and lots of predictable "don't speak ill of the dead" discourse about those celebrations

Weird evangelicals will pull some weird number trick talking about how Jesus was conceived on April 1st and that makes Trump a sort of messiah and people will make fun of that

The Republicans (after they're done with the faux-sadness and faux-outrage) will stomp over each other to be his successor but none of them will succeed. They'll tear each other apart and have no single nominee for the November elections.

There will be discourse about if Biden and the living former presidents should go to his funeral (they won't, he was a traitor insurrectionist)

The Ukraine-Russia War immediately goes in favor of Ukraine as morale in the Kremlin is reduced. China similarly backs off from its threats on Taiwan.

Ten thousand new memes are made, some sticking around for years to come.

Not a month later a bunch of unofficial biographies of Trump hit the bookshelves, many with new details about just how awful he was.

[bearifyme]

Reminds me of the time this guy (masc4masc dudebro 5 in 1 shampoo type) asked me (bussyboy icedcoffee bad driver bttm) on a date to see "Cocaine Bear" so I was like sure why not every bottom needs a top and I was newly single and ready to GAPE after the movie so I was being a good boywife to signal u know? Make sure he knew what I was after. I looked good in my little cargo shorts and Uniqlo cross shoulder bag, can you blame me for wanting to shine? I starved myself all day besides my Venti iced Macchiatto. Did a coffee Enema. Half way through the film im already dialating so we get into his old F150 and once i saw what he drove I was like oh im gonna be a victim of his weapon of ass destruction 4 sure. We get to his house. Messy. No permanent furniture. PS4 on the corner on the floor. Smells like old socks and cheap body spray. Oh!!! the Coque is gonna be good. We go into his room and it's dark but I can see he pulls down his pants to show me some old ass Hanes boxers. At this point my Nair hair removal addicted and bleached hole is fully dialated. He says hold on let me turn on the light to get condoms so he turns on the light. Charli XCX poster on the wall. He says hes gonna play some music. "Padam Padam" starts playing. Trahs bin, full of empty Starbucks - the clear cup!!!! Get this, he had a white iphone........I ended up having to top him. I guess Paris Hilton was right the stars really are blind huh? This is why bottoms deserve our stories told. Bottom stories matter. They do.

[bearifyme]

What if we docked butts together

[bearifyme]

lmao she’s right and she should say it! i hate when people do that weird ass heart 😭

[bearifyme]

[bearifyme]

Amphibian migration season is coming this spring. Remember to drive slow!

[bearifyme]

I mean yeah I'm interested in hairy dudes cumming on themselves, but damn I guess Tumblr is all about the porn again

[bearifyme]

This is actually a really interesting type of water retention that long grass does that I've never thought about before!

You can see how much slower the snow on the long grass is melting, which creates a slower percolation of water into the ground!

It's amazing what a difference vegetation can make for communities that struggle with drought conditions!

[bearifyme]

Throw the bussy in reverse I put your bussy in a hearse

[bearifyme]

all my haters turn to bators when i sit down at the gooncave of success

[bearifyme]

Gold, emerald, and enamel pendant depicting a caravel, Spain, circa 1580.

from The State Hermitage Museum, St. Petersburg

[bearifyme]

Amuse-bouche? Nah we're serving Anus Bush at the Cuntry Club

[bearifyme]

For real! Your recommendation for My New Boss Is Goofy came through at just the right time.

i have finished watching all of jujutsu kaisen.

bit of a downer huh

[bearifyme]

If you lookin for me I'll be on the cock

With his thang docked, possibly suckin on a strap now

Because I'm a rider, a slut supplier

[bearifyme]

Christmas cactus in all her glory

[bearifyme]

Behold mine harvest