beardburnsupersoldiers

[beardburnsupersoldiers]

Possessive AND loving Az 😍

Smoke and Mirrors

pairing: Azriel x Reader

content warnings: smut (18+)

word count: 3.4k

Permanent taglist: @motheroffae @tele86 @demon-master-zero @thegoddessofnothingness @rosecobollway @sillyfreakfanparty @s-a-v-a-n-a-34 @quiet-because-it-is-a-secret @plants-w0rld @frietiemeloen @the-hidey-hole @dnfhascorruptedme

Azriel permanent taglist: @kathren1sky-blog @phoenix666stuff @breathingstarlight

You always knew Azriel was dominant in the bedroom.

The way he carried himself, the way his voice dropped to that low, commanding rasp when he wanted something—it was intoxicating.

He had different tastes, always keeping things interesting between the two of you, always making sure there was never a dull moment.

But at the core of it, he was an alpha male through and through.

A warrior.

A protector.

A male who knew exactly what he wanted and wasn’t afraid to take it.

And you loved it.

You loved the way he could flip you onto your stomach with ease, pinning you beneath him, whispering filthy promises in your ear before making good on every single one of them.

You loved the way his hands could be both rough and reverent—how he could mark you with bruises and kisses in equal measure.

How he always made sure you felt every ounce of his power, his dominance, and yet, at the same time, you had never felt safer, never felt more cherished than you did in his arms.

Azriel pushed you to your limits, teased you mercilessly, controlled every sensation you felt until you were a shaking, desperate mess beneath him.

But he also worshipped you, adored you, loved you with a devotion that made your heart ache.

And when he growled out that you were his, when he claimed you with his hands, his mouth, his body—you felt it in every part of your soul.

You had never belonged to anyone before.

Never let any man take complete control over you, had never trusted anyone enough to fully surrender.

But with Azriel, it was effortless.

Natural.

Because he didn’t just demand your submission—he earned it.

And you gave it to him freely.

Again and again.

Because there was nothing in this world more exhilarating, more intoxicating, than being entirely at the mercy of the most powerful, most dangerous, most possessive male you had ever known.

Your mate.

Your Shadowsinger.

Your alpha.

So when he suggested taking you somewhere and trying something different, you knew it would be a night to remember.

*****

The air in the exclusive club was thick with seduction, the dim lighting casting sultry shadows along the plush, dark walls. The atmosphere was intoxicating—a blend of whispered moans, soft laughter, and the muted clink of crystal glasses. Velvet drapes hung from the ceilings, obscuring private rooms meant for those indulging in the most decadent pleasures.

Azriel’s hand was firm against the small of your back as he guided you through the club, his presence possessive, protective—yet the hunger in his hazel eyes told you he was just as intrigued as you were.

He had taken you here knowing exactly how the atmosphere would affect you both, knowing the deep-seated hunger that simmered just beneath your surface.

When you reached the private observation lounge, you were met with a wall of darkened glass. On the other side of the one-way mirror, a couple was already lost in the throes of pleasure. The woman lay back against crimson silk sheets, her body a canvas of arousal as her partner worshipped every inch of her with slow, deliberate movements.

The way he touched her—how he took his time, savoring her reactions—sent a slow burn curling in your belly.

Azriel’s breath was warm at your ear as he murmured, “You like watching, don’t you?” His voice was deep, husky, and you could hear the smirk in it.

You turned your head just enough to meet his gaze.

His pupils were blown wide with desire, his lips parted slightly, and gods, the way he was looking at you—it made you feel worshipped before he had even laid a hand on you.

You swallowed, pulse hammering, as you forced yourself to focus on the scene in front of you. The woman arched against her partner, wrists pinned above her head, moaning softly as his mouth traced a path down her body. The slow, languid way he touched her—reverent, worshipful—sent a fire licking through your veins.

Azriel’s fingers ghosted up the side of your thigh, teasing, barely there, but enough to make your breath hitch. “Tell me,”he murmured, his lips brushing the shell of your ear. “Tell me what you want.”

Your throat was dry, your body thrumming with need. “I—” You swallowed, eyes flicking back to the couple. “I like how he’s taking his time with her. How he’s making her feel everything.”

Azriel hummed in approval, his fingers slipping beneath the hem of your dress. “You want me to take my time with you?” His knuckles brushed the inside of your thigh, higher, higher, but not enough. “Or do you want me to make you come so fast you can barely breathe?”

A soft whimper left you, and his answering groan sent a shiver down your spine. “You sound so pretty when you make those noises, baby,” he praised, his fingers teasing the lace covering your core. “Are you wet for me already?”

You exhaled sharply as he pressed against the fabric, feeling the slick evidence of your arousal. His other hand gripped your jaw, turning your head slightly so he could capture your lips. It was slow at first, teasing, his tongue just barely flicking against yours—but then he growled low in his throat, deep and possessive, and the kiss turned consuming.

His hand pushed aside your panties, fingers gliding through your folds as he groaned into your mouth. “Fuck, you’re soaked,” he rasped. “All from watching them?”

You shook your head, pressing closer to him. “No,” you breathed. “It’s from you.”

Azriel cursed, his grip on you tightening. His fingers moved in slow, torturous circles, each one making your legs tremble, making you pant against his lips. “So responsive,” he murmured, nipping at your lower lip. “I love how easily you fall apart for me.”

A soft moan escaped you as he pressed harder, faster, his fingers working you with practiced precision. The couple on the other side of the glass might as well have disappeared—there was only Azriel, only his rough breathing in your ear, his hands playing your body like he was born to touch you.

His cock strained against his pants, aching, desperate. He needed to be inside you, needed to claim you right here, where anyone could walk in and hear you cry out his name.

“Azriel,” you gasped, hips rolling against his hand.

He groaned, gripping your chin and forcing you to look at him. His pupils were blown wide, his expression nothing short of feral. “You want me to fuck you right here, don’t you?” His voice was dark, dangerous, and full of raw hunger. “You want me to bend you over that couch and fuck you so hard, they’ll hear you in the next room.”

You whimpered, and he growled, his free hand reaching under your thighs to lift you. Before you knew it, he had you on your back on the lounge’s plush couch, his body caging you in. His mouth found yours again, all heat and desperation, while his hands worked at the buttons of his pants.

“Gods, I need to be inside you,” he panted, rubbing the tip of his cock through your slick folds. “I need to fuck you, need to claim you.”

You wrapped your legs around him, nails dragging down his back. “Then stop teasing me.”

Azriel let out a dark chuckle, and then—with one long, deep thrust—he buried himself inside you.

A low, guttural groan tore from his throat. “Fuck,” he cursed, forehead pressing against yours. “You feel so godsdamn good.”

Your head fell back against the cushions as you moaned, every inch of him stretching and filling you perfectly. He started to move, slow at first, letting you feel every inch of him, but soon his pace grew desperate, punishing.

“You love this, don’t you?” he growled, his hand gripping your thigh, pulling you even closer. “Love letting me fuck you like this—where anyone could walk in and see how wrecked you are for me.”

You moaned his name, hands clawing at his back as he drove into you, harder, deeper. His hips slammed against yours, the sound of skin against skin mixing with your breathless moans and his deep, broken groans.

He pulled back just enough to watch you, to see the way your lips parted in pleasure, the way your body trembled beneath him. His thumb found your clit, circling in tight, relentless movements, and you arched against him, your release hurtling toward you like a crashing wave.

“Come for me,” he commanded, his fingers slipping between you to rub tight, fast circles against your clit.

Your body shattered around him, pleasure consuming you, leaving you gasping, trembling beneath him. Azriel let out a strangled curse, his movements growing erratic as he chased his own release.

“Fuck—” His voice was a raw, broken moan as he slammed into you one last time, his body shaking as he spilled inside you. His lips crashed against yours, swallowing your moans as he thrust a few more times, riding out every last pulse of pleasure.

Azriel was still panting above you, his body slick with sweat, his hands gripping your thighs as he came down from his high. But then his gaze flickered downward, and his breath hitched in his throat. His release—thick, white, and glistening—was already beginning to drip out of you, coating your inner thighs, slipping down onto the plush cushions beneath you. His pupils blew wide, his cock twitching at the sight of it.

“Mother above,” he rasped, his voice rough with renewed hunger. “Look at you.”

His large hands slid down your thighs, spreading you open further, and his shadows slithered between your legs, caressing, teasing. The sight of his seed still leaking from you, mixed with your own arousal, had his mouth practically watering.

Azriel groaned, shaking his head as if he was trying to restrain himself—but he couldn’t. He wouldn’t.

Without another word, he lifted you and sat you on the edge of the couch, kneeling between your legs. His hands gripped your thighs possessively, spreading them wider as he lowered his head, inhaling deeply before dragging his tongue through the mess he had left inside you.

You let out a sharp cry, your hands flying to his hair, fingers tangling in the thick strands as he licked a slow, agonizing path through your folds.

“Taste so fucking good,” he groaned against you, his voice thick with lust. “My come, mixed with yours—fuck.”

He devoured you, tongue pressing inside you, lips closing around your clit as he sucked, rolling his tongue over it again and again. Your body trembled beneath him, your thighs squeezing his head, but he just grunted and gripped your legs tighter, holding you in place.

Your head fell back against the couch as your eyes flickered open, catching a glimpse of the couple beyond the one-way mirror. They were still tangled together, moving languidly, whispering to each other between soft moans. The sight of them, combined with Azriel’s relentless mouth on you, sent another wave of heat rolling through you.

“Azriel—” you gasped, your hips arching off the couch as he fucked you with his tongue, his hands keeping you open, exposed, completely at his mercy.

He hummed, the vibrations shooting straight through you. “Scream for me, baby,” he murmured against your clit, his voice dark and teasing. “Let them hear who you belong to.”

And you did.

The pleasure slammed into you, white-hot and all-consuming, ripping through you like lightning. You screamed his name, thighs trembling, body shattering as he lapped up every last drop of your release, drinking you down like he was starving.

He kept licking, kept sucking, kept fucking you with his tongue until tears pricked your eyes from the sheer overstimulation. Your hands weakly tugged at his hair, your body twitching beneath him.

Azriel finally pulled back, his lips glistening with your combined releases, his expression dark and utterly wrecked. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand, his golden-brown eyes locked onto yours as he smirked.

“Best fucking dessert I’ve ever had,” he murmured, pressing one last kiss to your inner thigh before climbing up your body, claiming your lips in a slow, deep kiss—letting you taste just how good you both were together.

Azriel groaned as he pulled you off the couch and down to your knees between his spread legs. His cock stood thick and hard, still slick from your earlier activities, twitching in anticipation. He reached out, gripping your chin between his fingers, tilting your head up so he could look into your eyes—those stormy gray eyes that had completely unraveled him.

“You know what to do, baby,” he murmured, his voice husky, full of need. “Suck my cock. Make a fucking mess of it.”

Without hesitation, you wrapped your fingers around his thick length, pumping him slowly as you leaned in, dragging your tongue along the underside of his shaft. He hissed, his head tilting back slightly, his wings flaring as you licked and kissed every inch of him.

Then, you took him into your mouth, wrapping your lips around his head and sucking gently before sinking down further.

“Fuck, just like that,” he groaned, his fingers tangling in your hair as he watched your head bob up and down over his cock. “Look at you. My good girl, taking me so well.”

Your tongue swirled around his tip as you hollowed your cheeks, sucking him deeper, your hands gripping his thighs for leverage. You glanced up at him through your lashes, and he smirked, his thumb brushing over your cheek.

“Such a pretty little mouth,” he murmured, voice thick with lust. “Meant to be wrapped around my cock.”

He glanced over at the one-way mirror, his golden-brown eyes darkening as he watched the couple on the other side. They were completely lost in each other, the male thrusting into the female as she moaned, clinging to him desperately. Azriel’s grip in your hair tightened as he groaned.

“Look at them,” he rasped. “Fucking like they’re the only two people in the world. Just like you and me, baby.”

His words sent another pulse of heat through you, making you clench your thighs together as you sucked him harder, deeper. His hips jerked as he let out a string of filthy curses, his restraint slipping.

“Gods, you’re so fucking good at this,” he growled. “Sucking me so deep, taking all of me. Just like you take my cock in that tight little pussy of yours.”

You whimpered around him, the vibrations making him shudder. He gritted his teeth, his breathing ragged, his cock pulsing on your tongue.

But just as he was about to come, he suddenly pulled you off of him, gripping your arms and hauling you into his lap. His eyes burned as he positioned you over him, lining himself up with your dripping entrance.

“I want to come inside you,” he growled, his hands gripping your hips. “Want to fill you up while I watch them.”

With one swift movement, he slammed you down onto his cock, burying himself to the hilt. You cried out, clutching his shoulders as he filled you completely, stretching you wide.

“Fuck, baby,” he groaned, his head falling against your shoulder as he gripped your ass, lifting you and slamming you back down onto him.

You started moving, riding him, your hands gripping his broad shoulders as you bounced in his lap. His eyes flickered between you and the couple beyond the mirror, his pupils blown wide with lust.

“Look at them,” he murmured against your ear, his breath hot on your skin. “Fucking so desperately… but you and me? We’re even filthier, aren’t we, baby?”

“Yes,” you gasped, your nails digging into his skin as you moved faster.

His fingers tightened on your hips, guiding you as he fucked up into you, his cock hitting deep with every thrust. The pleasure built rapidly, white-hot and overwhelming.

“Come on me,” he ordered, his voice rough, desperate. “Let them hear you. Let them hear how good I make you feel.”

You shattered, screaming his name as you clenched down on him, your entire body trembling as you came. The sensation of you gripping him so tightly sent him over the edge, and with a deep, guttural groan, he spilled inside you, his arms crushing you to him as he held you through it.

For a long moment, you both stayed like that—breathing hard, bodies tangled, sweat-slicked and satisfied. His lips pressed against your shoulder, then your neck, then your jaw, trailing soft kisses up to your lips.

“You’re a fucking dream, you know that?” he murmured, his voice hoarse.

You smiled breathlessly, stroking a hand through his damp hair. “And you’re the filthiest male I’ve ever met.”

He chuckled, pressing another kiss to your lips. “And you fucking love it.”

You laughed, resting your forehead against his. “I do.”

Azriel lets out a deep, satisfied sigh as he leans back against the couch, his arms wrapped securely around you. Your body is still trembling from the aftershocks, your head resting against his chest as you try to catch your breath. His fingers trace slow, lazy circles along your spine as he presses soft kisses to the crown of your head, his lips lingering against your skin as if savoring the taste of you.

“Fuck, baby,” he murmurs against your temple. “You are something else.”

You hum in response, pressing a soft kiss against his collarbone. He shifts beneath you, his still-sensitive cock twitching inside you, making you whimper softly. Azriel groans at the sound, his shadows curling possessively around you both.

With a soft chuckle, he gently lifts you off of him, setting you back down on shaky legs. He tugs you close, one arm bracing you against his chest while his other hand reaches for a cloth nearby. Dipping it into the cool water on the table beside the couch, he slowly, carefully cleans between your thighs, his movements gentle and reverent.

The sensation makes you shiver, your thighs clenching as he smirks, knowing exactly what he's doing to you. He presses a lingering kiss to the inside of your knee, then another to the soft skin of your thigh before working his way up, trailing featherlight kisses across your stomach, your ribs, your collarbone.

When he finally reaches your lips, he captures them in a slow, sensual kiss, his tongue teasing yours in a lazy, intoxicating rhythm. You sigh into his mouth, completely melting against him.

But then he pulls back, resting his forehead against yours. “We need to leave now,” he murmurs, though he makes no move to actually do so. His hands still grip your waist, his body pressing insistently against yours. “If we don’t, I will fuck you again. And again. All night. Right here. While we watch that couple.”

You smirk, sliding your fingers into his hair, tugging slightly. “And the problem with that is…?”

Azriel groans, his grip tightening on your waist, his hips pressing forward just enough to remind you that he’s already getting hard again. His jaw clenches as his shadows snake around you, teasing over your skin like a warning.

“No,” he growls, his voice dark and commanding. “Not here. Not in this place where anyone could walk in and see what belongs to me. It was okay for a little while, but not all night.”

Your breath catches at the possessiveness in his voice, at the sheer dominance in the way he grips your waist, his thumb stroking just under your ribs in slow, deliberate circles.

“For the rest of the night, you are mine,” he continues, his voice low, thick with promise. “And I will claim you properly. Somewhere private. Somewhere no one will hear you screaming my name all night long.”

You shiver at his words, heat pooling low in your belly. “Then what are we waiting for?”

Azriel’s smirk is all wicked, all alpha male.

In one swift movement, he gathers your clothes, tossing them to you before adjusting his own pants. Then, without another word, he wraps his arms around you, his shadows swirling as he winnows you both out of the club—straight to the privacy of your home, where there would be no interruptions.

Where he could have you exactly the way he wanted.    

[beardburnsupersoldiers]

Oh poor Cass 😂

Concussed (Azriel x Reader)

Cassian accidentally gives you a concussion, his only request is that you give him time to get away before Az gets home.

------

“Your heads not in the game,” Cassian teased, nudging your feet apart as he examined your form. “Come on, what’s on your mind?”

               “Nothing is on my mind.” You mumbled, dropping your fist and turning to him with a pout. “We’ve been out here for hours, can we please be done?”

               It was an unusually hot day, and you and Cassian had stripped down to the bare minimum, and it still wasn’t cool enough. His torso was coated in sweat, and you could see the defined lines of muscle lining his abdomen and arms. You, on the other hand, had only joined the inner circle recently, and you couldn’t see any muscle in your abdomen, hence the vigorous training sessions with Cassian.

               “Do you think Hybern is going to wait until it’s nice and cool outside to attack us?” Cassian asked, raising his eyebrows and crossing his arms.

               “I don’t know… maybe?” You shrugged, he shook his head, laughing. “Spar with me one more time.”

               “I always lose!” the grumble left you before you could stop yourself. Cassian laughed again, and you got into position on the mat, and he stood across from you. Past Cassian, you could see the landscape of Velaris, the mountains in the background with the sun high above. Clouds littered the sky but provided almost no shadow.

               Speaking of shadows, you wonder what Azriel had been up to. You hadn’t seen him today, where usually you two spoke before breakfast. Seeing him was one of your favorite parts of the day, whilst he was quiet and refined with everyone else, you made him smile and laugh. Your friendship was full of inside jokes, occasional hugs and a lot of pining for him. You wish you were able to move on, and in an effort to, you told Cassian- but that was a huge mistake.

               Cassian teased both of you, constantly, and you could tell Azriel was embarrassed. You two would be eating breakfast together in the morning, and Cassian would come in and call you two lovebirds, or a nice couple, or even ask if he was interrupting something with a wink. Azriel would always snap some retort back at Cassian, something along the lines of ‘Not us’,  “Not gonna happen”, or, the one that hurt your heart the most, “Not in a million years.”

               Sure, Cassian’s teasing was embarrassing, but you never understood why Azriel felt like he had to shut it down so harshly, Cassian was only joking after all.

               “You’re not focused!” Cassian snapped his fingers in front of you, and your eyes moved quickly from the mountains to him. “Did you hear anything I just said?”

               “Of course I did!” You snap back.

               “Lets see about that.” Cassian replied, his fist came at you in the combination you guys had been working on. You ducked to the right and you heard the whoosh of his hand past your ear. You blocked his right knee with your forearm, turning quickly to throw a punch into his unshielded face.

               Instead of watching your fist land a satisfying blow to his chin, you instead watched as his fist came right towards you and land an unforgiving blow to your right temple. You flew back on the mat, landing in a heap and losing the air in your lungs.

               “Y/N!” Cassian shouted, quickly getting on his knees and standing above you. You saw his shadowed blurried face above yours. After a few moments, you were able to gasp, your lungs finally allowing air in. Cassian’s one face turned into two, then four. “Y/N, are you okay?”

               “I don’t know.” You whispered, you reached up for his face to see if there was really four of him. You cupped his cheek. “Cassian, I am literally seeing like- eight of you right now.”

               “Fuck Y/N!” Cassian groaned, turning his head away and looking around. “I thought you said you heard what I said, I told you that after the first combination, we were skipping the second and doing the third.”

               “I think I lied.” You groaned, your arm falling back down to your side. You reached up to feel your head and could feel that your eye area was swelling already. “The sun is so bright.”

               “I’m going to take you to madja Y/N, but please, do not tell Azriel.”

------

               Hours passed, and Madja diagnosed you with a slight concussion. She was able to give you something for the pain, but the bruising and eventual black eye was unavoidable. Cassian had tucked you into your chair in the library, making sure you had a snack, a couple of books and a tall glass of water within reach. “Cassian- I’m not helpless you know.”  

               “Y/N- trust me, this is the least I can do.” Cassian handed you your book, then moved the table even closer to you. “Is this close enough?”

               “Yes! I’m fine, you guys get punched around all the time, I can handle it.” You tried to raise your eyebrows in a teasing manner but felt a surge of pain through the right side of your face. Cassian’s face fell, “I’m serious, don’t feel bad. It was my fault for not paying attention.”

               “He’s not going to see it that way.” Cassian retorted, and you shook his head.

               “Why are so worried about what Azriel will think?”

               “I just do not want to be anywhere near here when he comes home, speaking of which, I best be on my way.” He leaned down, giving you a light hug before backing up. “Again, I’m sorry, but I’ll see you tomorrow yeah?”

               “Yeah.” You nodded, smiling as he walked from the door. You looked around the now empty room, the fire was roaring in the fireplace, the light leaving shadows against the dark shelves filled with books in varying condition. You nestled into your chair, opening the book and continuing where you left off.

------

               The door opened to the library with a groan, and you smiled to yourself,  noticing the new shadows flowing around you that were  not caused by the fire. “Hey Az.” You hummed, not turning towards him.

               “Hey, how was your day?” His low voice reverberated through the small space, making you smile. He sat in the chair next to you. You were sure he looked handsome, like he does every night, but you didn’t turn your head, instead leaving your hair to frame the ugly bruise.

               “It was uneventful.” You flipped the page, “What about yours?”

               “Just uneventful?” Azriel reached his hand over, grabbing your arm. “What was uneventful?”     

               “Just did a little sparing with…. Cassian.” You hesitated, “It was hot, very hot, and very uneventful.”

               “I feel like you’re not telling me something.” Azriel said, and your felt him get up and go to kneel in front of you. You looked down even further, you probably looked ridiculous. “Why aren’t you looking at me?”

               “No reason Az, my eyes are…tried of looking at stuff.” You cringed at your bad excuse. “I mean- I think its time to get to bed. You walk out first- I’ll be right behind you.”

               Azriel slowly placed his hand on your chin, and gently forced your head up, causing your eyes to meet his. His teasing smile immediately dissolved into concern, then anger. “Y/N!” Azriel’s voice was sharp, but his hands were still gentle as he cradled his face. “What happened?”

               “It wasn’t Cassian’s fault!” You pushed your hair behind your ear, “I was distracted and then his fist just came out of nowhere-“

               Azriel stood up, walking out of the room. You got up to follow, trotting behind him as he went to Cassian’s door. He swung it open, not knocking, and stormed into his empty room. “Where is he?” Azriel growled, turning back to you.

               “Azriel calm down!’ You replied, coming over and grabbing his arm. His shadows dispersed, probably looking for Cassian somewhere in the house. “He left- I don’t know where.”

               “I’m going to kill him.” Azriel looked down at your face, but instead of meeting your eyes he stared at the huge bruise.  

               You understood why Cassian left in this moment, but couldn’t exactly figure out why Azriel was losing his cool. “Azriel please-“

               “Where did he go?”

               “I don’t know! I just said that!” You replied, you turned your head back towards the door and winced, the quick motion causing your head to throb. Azriel’s hand immediately fell to your cheek again. “I’m sorry, it just hurts.”

               “I’m sorry,” he whispers, “lets go back.”

               His hand hovered over your lower back as you walked. “Do you have a concussion?”

               “A slight one, yeah.” You replied, deciding that instead of the library, your room was definitely a better destination.

               “I’m sorry to cut tonight short Az, but I’m really tired.” You looked up at him, opening your door. He nodded, following you in and sitting in the chair next to the bed as you laid down, getting under the covers. As you settled into your pillow, you expected him to move, or leave, but he stayed put. “What are you doing Az?”

               “I’m going to make sure you’re okay.” Azriel stated, leaning back in the chair, his wings awkwardly crunched between him and the wall.

               “Not that I don’t enjoy your company, you know I do, but what?”

               “Concussions are serious Y/N, even if Madja says you’re okay I’m not taking the chance that you’re not, so I’m staying here.”

               “all night?” You retorted, and he nodded.

               “Yep.”

               “Az please, go to bed. You look uncomfortable.”

               “Nope.”

               You glared at him, and he sighed, leaning forward and clasping his scarred hands on his knees. “You want the truth?” You nodded, “I would sit here, all night, and watch you sleep just to make sure you woke up. The fact that Cassian hurt you…. Makes me want to tear him limb from limb, even if he is my brother.”

               “Az-“ You started, leaning up on one arm and taking a good look at him. His eyes bore in to yours, no trace of humor left in them. “You’re serious.”

               “Yes, I’m serious.” He replied, “so don’t ask me to leave again, because I won’t, I physically- I physically can’t leave.”

               “Then at least climb in with me.” You whispered, patting the spot next to you. He froze. “Please, you look uncomfortable.”

               “That’s the concussion talking.” Az mused, and you shook your head.

               “I swear it’s not.” You whispered, earnestly looking at him. “If you were ever hurt, I don’t know what I would do. Do you want the truth?” he nodded, and you sighed. “I didn’t see the punch coming because I was thinking about you, and about…how you would never feel the same way as I do.”

               “And how is that?” Azriel dropped to his knees, coming to the edge of the bed.

               “I…care about you, deeply. I want to spend every day with you, and…” You felt tears prick your eyes and you turned away, your face flushing in embarrassment. “Honestly it really hurts my feelings when you say you could never see us happening, because I’ve always seen us happening.”

               He stared at you, hands falling to his side. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m concussed.” You quickly wiped the tears from your eyes, turning away and plopping on the bed. “Forget I said anything, goodnight, Az.”

               After a few moments, the bed creaked and you felt a warm hand on your shoulder, slightly pulling you. You turned, and Az was above you on his side, staring at the non-bruised side of your face.

               “I have always thought that you would not be able to love me, for the things that I have done.” He whispered, cupping your face. “I never wanted to offend you with the… insinuation that we could ever be a match.”

               “My chest physically hurts when I’m away from you, and my shadows would rather be with you than with me at this point, you are so kind, so beautiful, the thought of us together, the thought of you caring about me, and possibly loving me, just seemed too much like a dream rather than reality.” Tears burned your eyes again as he spoke, “I love you, I’m sorry I ever made you think differently.”

               “I love you too.” You whispered, and he wiped the tear from your cheek. “All those comments Cassian made- it was because I told him how I felt about you, he was just teasing me.”

               Azriel barked a laugh, turning away from you on his back. You looked at him in concern, and he just shook his head. “I had told him about my feelings for you, I thought he was…I thought those comments were aimed at me.”

               You shook your head, laughing as well. “ Az, I won’t stop you if you still want to kill him.”

[beardburnsupersoldiers]

Ahhh I do love me some Sensei Psycho Hottie!

ᗪᗩTIᑎᘜ ՏᗴᑎՏᗴI ᗯOᒪᖴ ᕼᗴᗩᗪᑕᗩᑎOᑎՏ

- ɪɴᴄʟᴜᴅᴇs sғᴡ, ɴsғᴡ, ᴀɴᴅ ǫᴜᴏᴛᴇs -

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚　˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚　˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

- sғᴡ, ɴsғᴡ, ᴀɴᴅ ǫᴜᴏᴛᴇs

- ɪᴍᴘʟɪᴇᴅ ғᴇᴍ! ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

- ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ sᴇɴsᴇɪ ᴡᴏʟғ x ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ.

⋇⋆✦⋆⋇　

sғᴡ

- ʜᴀʀᴅ ᴇxᴛᴇʀɪᴏʀ, sᴏғᴛ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ: ᴡᴏʟғ ɪs ᴛʜᴇ ᴅᴇғɪɴɪᴛɪᴏɴ ᴏғ ᴛᴏᴜɢʜ ʟᴏᴠᴇ. ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴏɴᴇ ᴇʟsᴇ, ʜᴇ’s ᴄᴏʟᴅ, sᴛʀɪᴄᴛ, ᴀɴᴅ ᴜɴᴡᴀᴠᴇʀɪɴɢ, ʙᴜᴛ ᴡʜᴇɴ ɪᴛ ᴄᴏᴍᴇs ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜ? ʜɪs ᴡᴀʟʟs ᴄʀᴀᴄᴋ. ʜᴇ’s sᴛɪʟʟ ɴᴏᴛ ᴏᴠᴇʀʟʏ ᴀғғᴇᴄᴛɪᴏɴᴀᴛᴇ ɪɴ ᴘᴜʙʟɪᴄ, ʙᴜᴛ ʙᴇʜɪɴᴅ ᴄʟᴏsᴇᴅ ᴅᴏᴏʀs, ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴇᴛ ᴛᴏ sᴇᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ʀᴀʀᴇ, sᴏғᴛᴇʀ sɪᴅᴇ ᴏғ ʜɪᴍ.

- ᴘᴏssᴇssɪᴠᴇ ʙᴜᴛ ɴᴏᴛ ᴄᴏɴᴛʀᴏʟʟɪɴɢ: ʜᴇ ᴅᴏᴇsɴ’ᴛ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ɢᴜʏs ʟᴏᴏᴋɪɴɢ ᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ғᴏʀ ᴛᴏᴏ ʟᴏɴɢ. ʜᴇ ᴡᴏɴ’ᴛ sᴛᴀʀᴛ ᴀ ғɪɢʜᴛ ᴏᴠᴇʀ ɪᴛ, ʙᴜᴛ ʜɪs ʙᴏᴅʏ ʟᴀɴɢᴜᴀɢᴇ sʜɪғᴛs—ᴊᴀᴡ ᴄʟᴇɴᴄʜᴇᴅ, ᴀʀᴍs ᴄʀᴏssᴇᴅ, sᴛᴀɴᴅɪɴɢ ᴊᴜsᴛ ᴀ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴄʟᴏsᴇʀ ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜ. ɪғ sᴏᴍᴇᴏɴᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟʟʏ ᴅɪsʀᴇsᴘᴇᴄᴛs ʏᴏᴜ, ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜ? ᴡᴏʟғ ᴡɪʟʟ ʜᴀɴᴅʟᴇ ɪᴛ, ɴᴏ ʜᴇsɪᴛᴀᴛɪᴏɴ.

- ᴛʜᴇ ᴘʀᴏᴛᴇᴄᴛɪᴠᴇ ᴛʏᴘᴇ: ʜᴇ ᴀʟᴡᴀʏs ᴍᴀᴋᴇs sᴜʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ sᴀғᴇ. ᴇᴠᴇɴ ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ sᴛʀᴏɴɢ ᴀɴᴅ ɪɴᴅᴇᴘᴇɴᴅᴇɴᴛ, ʜᴇ’ʟʟ ᴅᴏᴜʙʟᴇ-ᴄʜᴇᴄᴋ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ʟᴏᴄᴋᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴅᴏᴏʀ, ᴡᴀʟᴋ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴄᴀʀ, ᴀɴᴅ ɪɴsɪsᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴀʟʟ ʜɪᴍ ɪғ ᴀɴʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ʜᴀᴘᴘᴇɴs. ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ ɪɴᴠᴏʟᴠᴇᴅ ɪɴ ᴋᴀʀᴀᴛᴇ, ʜᴇ ᴛʀᴀɪɴs ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘᴇʀsᴏɴᴀʟʟʏ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ sᴜʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ ʜᴏʟᴅ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴏᴡɴ.

- ᴀ ᴍᴀɴ ᴏғ ғᴇᴡ ᴡᴏʀᴅs (ʙᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇʏ ᴍᴀᴛᴛᴇʀ): ᴡᴏʟғ ᴅᴏᴇsɴ’ᴛ ʀᴀᴍʙʟᴇ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ʜɪs ғᴇᴇʟɪɴɢs, ʙᴜᴛ ᴡʜᴇɴ ʜᴇ ᴅᴏᴇs sᴀʏ sᴏᴍᴇᴛʜɪɴɢ sᴡᴇᴇᴛ, ɪᴛ ʜɪᴛs. sɪᴍᴘʟᴇ ᴛʜɪɴɢs ʟɪᴋᴇ “ʏᴏᴜ ᴅɪᴅ ɢᴏᴏᴅ ᴛᴏᴅᴀʏ” ᴏʀ “ɪ ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ ᴡᴀɴᴛ ᴛᴏ ʟᴏsᴇ ʏᴏᴜ” ᴍᴇᴀɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴏʀʟᴅ ʙᴇᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ʜᴇ ᴅᴏᴇsɴ’ᴛ sᴀʏ ᴛʜɪɴɢs ʟɪɢʜᴛʟʏ.

- ᴀᴄᴛs ᴏғ sᴇʀᴠɪᴄᴇ ᴏᴠᴇʀ ᴡᴏʀᴅs: ʜᴇ ᴡᴏɴ’ᴛ ɢᴜsʜ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ʜɪs ʟᴏᴠᴇ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ, ʙᴜᴛ ʜᴇ’ʟʟ sʜᴏᴡ ɪᴛ ɪɴ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ᴡᴀʏs—ғɪxɪɴɢ ᴛʜɪɴɢs ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ, ʀᴇᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴄᴏғғᴇᴇ ᴏʀᴅᴇʀ, ᴘᴜʟʟɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀɢᴀɪɴsᴛ ʜɪs ᴄʜᴇsᴛ ᴀғᴛᴇʀ ᴀ ʟᴏɴɢ ᴅᴀʏ. ɪᴛ’s ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ʜᴇ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜᴇs ᴏᴠᴇʀ ʏᴏᴜ, ᴇᴠᴇɴ ɪғ ʜᴇ ᴘʀᴇᴛᴇɴᴅs ʜᴇ’s ɴᴏᴛ.

- ᴀʀɢᴜᴍᴇɴᴛs ɢᴇᴛ ʜᴇᴀᴛᴇᴅ: ʜᴇ ʜᴀs ᴀ ᴛᴇᴍᴘᴇʀ, ᴀɴᴅ sᴏ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ. ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛᴡᴏ ғɪɢʜᴛ, ɪᴛ’s ɪɴᴛᴇɴsᴇ—sᴛᴜʙʙᴏʀɴ ɢʟᴀʀᴇs, sʜᴀʀᴘ ᴡᴏʀᴅs, ᴀɴᴅ ᴛᴇɴsɪᴏɴ sᴏ ᴛʜɪᴄᴋ ɪᴛ’s sᴜғғᴏᴄᴀᴛɪɴɢ. ʙᴜᴛ ᴏɴᴄᴇ ᴛʜɪɴɢs ᴄᴏᴏʟ ᴅᴏᴡɴ, ᴡᴏʟғ ᴀʟᴡᴀʏs ғɪɴᴅs ᴀ ᴡᴀʏ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ғᴏʀ ɪᴛ. ᴀ ᴅᴇᴇᴘ, ʀᴀsᴘʏ ᴀᴘᴏʟᴏɢʏ. ᴀ ʟɪɴɢᴇʀɪɴɢ ᴛᴏᴜᴄʜ. ᴀ ʀᴀʀᴇ ʙᴜᴛ ᴍᴇᴀɴɪɴɢғᴜʟ “ɪ ɴᴇᴇᴅ ʏᴏᴜ.”

- sᴏғᴛ ɪɴ ᴘʀɪᴠᴀᴛᴇ: ɪɴ ᴘᴜʙʟɪᴄ, ʜᴇ’s ᴀʟʟ ʙᴜsɪɴᴇss. ʙᴜᴛ ᴡʜᴇɴ ɪᴛ’s ᴊᴜsᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴡᴏ ᴏғ ʏᴏᴜ? ʜᴇ ʟᴇᴛs ʜɪᴍsᴇʟғ ʀᴇʟᴀx. ʜᴇ’ʟʟ ʟᴇᴛ ʏᴏᴜ sɪᴛ ᴏɴ ʜɪs ʟᴀᴘ ᴡʜɪʟᴇ ʜᴇ ʟᴇᴀɴs ʙᴀᴄᴋ, ᴀʀᴍs ʟᴀᴢɪʟʏ ᴡʀᴀᴘᴘᴇᴅ ᴀʀᴏᴜɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ, ʜɪs ɴᴏsᴇ ʙʀᴜsʜɪɴɢ ᴀɢᴀɪɴsᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛᴇᴍᴘʟᴇ. ɪᴛ’s ʜɪs ᴡᴀʏ ᴏғ ɢʀᴏᴜɴᴅɪɴɢ ʜɪᴍsᴇʟғ—ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ ʜɪs ᴘᴇᴀᴄᴇ ɪɴ ᴀʟʟ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄʜᴀᴏs.

- ʟᴏʏᴀʟ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴏʀᴇ: ɪғ ᴡᴏʟғ ᴄʜᴏᴏsᴇs ʏᴏᴜ, ʜᴇ ᴄʜᴏᴏsᴇs ʏᴏᴜ. ɴᴏ ɢᴀᴍᴇs, ɴᴏ ʜᴇsɪᴛᴀᴛɪᴏɴ. ᴏɴᴄᴇ ʜᴇ’s ɪɴ, ʜᴇ’s ᴀʟʟ ɪɴ. ᴇᴠᴇɴ ɪғ ʜᴇ sᴛʀᴜɢɢʟᴇs ᴛᴏ ᴇxᴘʀᴇss ɪᴛ sᴏᴍᴇᴛɪᴍᴇs, ʜᴇ’s ʏᴏᴜʀs, ᴀɴᴅ ʜᴇ’ʟʟ ᴅᴏ ᴡʜᴀᴛᴇᴠᴇʀ ɪᴛ ᴛᴀᴋᴇs ᴛᴏ ᴋᴇᴇᴘ ʏᴏᴜ.

ɴsғᴡ

- ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴅᴀᴍɴ sᴍɪʀᴋ: ᴡᴏʟғ ᴋɴᴏᴡs ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʜᴇ’s ᴅᴏɪɴɢ ᴡʜᴇɴ ʜᴇ ɢɪᴠᴇs ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʜᴀᴛ sʟᴏᴡ, ᴄᴏᴄᴋʏ sᴍɪʀᴋ, ᴇʏᴇs ᴅᴀʀᴋ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴀᴍᴜsᴇᴍᴇɴᴛ. ʜᴇ’ʟʟ ʟᴇᴀɴ ɪɴ ᴄʟᴏsᴇ, ᴠᴏɪᴄᴇ ᴅʀᴏᴘᴘɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ᴀ ʟᴏᴡ ʀᴀsᴘ ᴀs ʜᴇ ᴍᴜʀᴍᴜʀs, “ʏᴏᴜ ᴋᴇᴇᴘ ʟᴏᴏᴋɪɴɢ ᴀᴛ ᴍᴇ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ, sᴡᴇᴇᴛʜᴇᴀʀᴛ, ᴀɴᴅ ᴡᴇ’ʀᴇ ɢᴏɴɴᴀ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴀ ᴘʀᴏʙʟᴇᴍ.” ʜᴇ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏs ʟᴏᴏᴋɪɴɢ ᴜᴘ ᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜᴀᴛ sᴀᴍᴇ sᴍɪʀᴋ ᴀs ʜᴇ ʟᴇᴀᴠᴇs sᴏғᴛ ʟɪᴄᴋs ᴏɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴄᴏʀᴇ.

- ᴛʀᴀɪɴɪɴɢ ɢᴇᴛs… ɪɴᴛᴇɴsᴇ: sᴘᴀʀʀɪɴɢ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴡᴏʟғ ɪs ᴀʟʀᴇᴀᴅʏ ʜᴀʀᴅ ᴇɴᴏᴜɢʜ, ʙᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴇɴsɪᴏɴ? ᴜɴʙᴇᴀʀᴀʙʟᴇ. ʜᴇ ᴅᴏᴇsɴ’ᴛ ᴊᴜsᴛ ᴄᴏʀʀᴇᴄᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀ ғᴏʀᴍ—ʜᴇ sᴛᴀɴᴅs ʙᴇʜɪɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ, ʜɪs ʜᴀɴᴅs ғɪʀᴍʟʏ ɢᴜɪᴅɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀs, ʜɪs ʙʀᴇᴀᴛʜ ʜᴏᴛ ᴀɢᴀɪɴsᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴇᴀʀ. ʜɪs ʙᴏɴᴇʀ ɢʀᴀᴢɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀss ᴡʜᴇɴ ʜᴇ ᴍᴏᴠᴇs. ᴀɴᴅ ᴡʜᴇɴ ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ ᴘɪɴɴᴇᴅ ʙᴇɴᴇᴀᴛʜ ʜɪᴍ ᴀғᴛᴇʀ ᴀ ᴛᴀᴋᴇᴅᴏᴡɴ? ʜɪs ʟɪᴘs ᴛᴡɪᴛᴄʜ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴀ sᴍɪʀᴋ ᴀs ʜᴇ ᴍᴜʀᴍᴜʀs, “ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏɴɴᴀ ᴛᴀᴘ ᴏᴜᴛ, ᴏʀ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴋᴇ ʙᴇɪɴɢ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀ ᴍᴇ?” ɪᴛ's ɪɴsᴀɴᴇ ʜᴏᴡ ᴍᴀɴʏ ᴛɪᴍᴇs ᴛʀᴀɪɴɪɴɢ ᴛᴜʀɴs ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴀ ᴏ̨ᴜɪᴄᴋ ғᴜᴄᴋ ʙᴇғᴏʀᴇ ᴛʜᴇ sᴛᴜᴅᴇɴᴛs ᴀʀʀɪᴠᴇ.

- ᴛᴇᴀsɪɴɢ ɪɴ ᴘᴜʙʟɪᴄ, ᴘᴀʏʙᴀᴄᴋ ɪɴ ᴘʀɪᴠᴀᴛᴇ: ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʀʏ ᴛᴏ ғʟᴜsᴛᴇʀ ʜɪᴍ ɪɴ ғʀᴏɴᴛ ᴏғ ᴛʜᴇ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀs—ᴍᴀʏʙᴇ ʙʀᴜsʜɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀ ғɪɴɢᴇʀs ᴀʟᴏɴɢ ʜɪs ᴄʀᴏᴛᴄʜ ᴀ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴛᴏᴏ sʟᴏᴡʟʏ ᴏʀ ɢɪᴠɪɴɢ ʜɪᴍ ᴀɴ ɪɴɴᴏᴄᴇɴᴛ ʟᴏᴏᴋ ᴛʜᴀᴛ’s ɴᴏᴛ sᴏ ɪɴɴᴏᴄᴇɴᴛ—ʜᴇ ᴡᴏɴ’ᴛ ʀᴇᴀᴄᴛ ʀɪɢʜᴛ ᴀᴡᴀʏ. ʙᴜᴛ ʟᴀᴛᴇʀ? ᴏʜ, ʜᴇ ᴍᴀᴋᴇs ʏᴏᴜ ᴘᴀʏ ғᴏʀ ɪᴛ ᴀɴᴅ ʜᴇ's ᴘɪssᴇᴅ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴs. ʙᴀᴄᴋ ᴘʀᴇssᴇᴅ ᴀɢᴀɪɴsᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴀʟʟ, ʜɪs ʟɪᴘs ʙᴀʀᴇʟʏ ɢʜᴏsᴛɪɴɢ ᴏᴠᴇʀ ʏᴏᴜʀs ᴀs ʜᴇ ʀᴀsᴘs, “ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀɴɴᴀ ᴘʟᴀʏ ɢᴀᴍᴇs, sᴡᴇᴇᴛʜᴇᴀʀᴛ? ʟᴇᴛ’s sᴇᴇ ʜᴏᴡ ᴍᴀɴʏ sǫᴜɪʀᴛs ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ ɢɪᴠᴇ ᴍᴇ.”

- ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴄᴏᴍᴍᴀɴᴅɪɴɢ ᴘʀᴇsᴇɴᴄᴇ: ᴡᴏʟғ ᴅᴏᴇsɴ’ᴛ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴀsᴋ ғᴏʀ ᴛʜɪɴɢs—ʜᴇ ᴛᴇʟʟs ʏᴏᴜ. ᴡʜᴇᴛʜᴇʀ ɪᴛ’s ᴀ sɪᴍᴘʟᴇ “ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ʜᴇʀᴇ” ᴏʀ ᴀ ғɪʀᴍ “sᴛᴀʏ sᴛɪʟʟ” ᴡʜᴇɴ ʜᴇ’s ᴛᴇᴀsɪɴɢ, ʜɪs ᴠᴏɪᴄᴇ ᴀʟᴏɴᴇ ɪs ᴇɴᴏᴜɢʜ ᴛᴏ sᴇɴᴅ sʜɪᴠᴇʀs ᴅᴏᴡɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ sᴘɪɴᴇ. ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ʜᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋs ᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ? ʟɪᴋᴇ ʜᴇ’s ᴀʟʀᴇᴀᴅʏ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ᴏғ ᴛᴇɴ ᴅɪғғᴇʀᴇɴᴛ ᴡᴀʏs ᴛᴏ ʀᴜɪɴ ʏᴏᴜ."sᴛᴏᴘ ғᴜᴄᴋɪɴɢ ᴍᴏᴠɪɴɢ ᴏʀ ɪ'ʟʟ ʟᴇᴀᴠᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴜɴғɪɴɪsʜᴇᴅ." ʜᴇ'ʟʟ ᴡʜɪsᴘᴇʀ ɪɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴇᴀʀ ᴡʜᴇɴ ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴏᴠᴇ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴀss ʙᴀᴄᴋ ᴛᴏ ʜɪs ᴄᴏᴄᴋ.

- ᴛᴇɴsɪᴏɴ ᴀғᴛᴇʀ ᴀʀɢᴜᴍᴇɴᴛs: ʏᴏᴜ ᴀɴᴅ ᴡᴏʟғ ғɪɢʜᴛ ʜᴀʀᴅ—sʜᴀʀᴘ ��ᴏʀᴅs, sᴛᴏʀᴍʏ ɢʟᴀʀᴇs, ʙᴏᴛʜ ᴏғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛᴏᴏ ᴅᴀᴍɴ sᴛᴜʙʙᴏʀɴ. ʙᴜᴛ ᴏɴᴄᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴀɴɢᴇʀ sɪᴍᴍᴇʀs ᴅᴏᴡɴ? ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴛᴇɴsɪᴏɴ ʟɪɴɢᴇʀs. ʜᴇ’ʟʟ ᴄᴏʀɴᴇʀ ʏᴏᴜ, ʜɪs ᴇʏᴇs ᴅᴀʀᴋ ᴀs ʜᴇ ɢʀɪᴛs ᴏᴜᴛ, “ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏɴᴇ ʀᴜɴɴɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴀᴛ sᴍᴀʀᴛ ᴍᴏᴜᴛʜ ᴏғ ʏᴏᴜʀs?” ʙᴇғᴏʀᴇ ᴄʀᴀsʜɪɴɢ ʜɪs ʟɪᴘs ᴀɢᴀɪɴsᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀs, ᴀʟʟ ʜᴇᴀᴛ ᴀɴᴅ ᴅᴇsᴘᴇʀᴀᴛɪᴏɴ. ʜᴇ'ʟʟ ᴘᴜsʜ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴋɴᴇᴇs ᴀɴᴅ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴜsᴇ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʙʀᴀᴛᴛʏ ᴍᴏᴜᴛʜ ғᴏʀ sᴏᴍᴇᴛʜɪɴɢ ʙᴇᴛᴛᴇʀ.

- ʀᴏᴜɢʜ ʜᴀɴᴅs, ɢᴇɴᴛʟᴇ ᴛᴏᴜᴄʜ: ʜɪs ʜᴀɴᴅs ᴀʀᴇ ᴄᴀʟʟᴏᴜsᴇᴅ, ʀᴏᴜɢʜ ғʀᴏᴍ ʏᴇᴀʀs ᴏғ ᴛʀᴀɪɴɪɴɢ, ʙᴜᴛ ᴡʜᴇɴ ᴛʜᴇʏ’ʀᴇ ᴏɴ ʏᴏᴜ? ʜɪs ᴅᴇʟɪʙᴇʀᴀᴛᴇ. ғɪɴɢᴇʀs ᴛʀᴀᴄɪɴɢ sʟᴏᴡ, ʟᴀᴢʏ ᴘᴀᴛᴛᴇʀɴs ᴏɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛʜɪɢʜ, ɢʀɪᴘᴘɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴡᴀɪsᴛ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʜᴀʀᴅ ᴇɴᴏᴜɢʜ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ʏᴏᴜ sʜɪᴠᴇʀ, ʟᴏᴏᴋɪɴɢ ᴜᴘ ᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀs ʜᴇ ᴀᴛᴇ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴘᴜssʏ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴀ sᴛᴀʀᴠᴇᴅ ᴍᴀɴ. “ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ sᴏ ᴅᴀᴍɴ sᴡᴇᴇᴛ ʙᴀʙʏ,” ʜᴇ ᴍᴜᴛᴛᴇʀs ʙᴇғᴏʀᴇ ʜᴜᴍᴍɪɴɢ ᴀɢᴀɪɴsᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀɴᴅ ᴄʟᴏsɪɴɢ ʜɪs ᴇʏᴇs ᴛᴏ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏ ʜɪs ᴍᴇᴀʟ.

- ᴄᴏɴᴛʀᴏʟ, ʙᴜᴛ ᴊᴜsᴛ ʙᴀʀᴇʟʏ: ᴡᴏʟғ ʟɪᴋᴇs ᴄᴏɴᴛʀᴏʟ, ʙᴜᴛ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ? ɪᴛ’s ᴀ ᴄᴏɴsᴛᴀɴᴛ ʙᴀᴛᴛʟᴇ. sᴏᴍᴇ ɴɪɢʜᴛs, ʜᴇ ᴄᴀɴ ᴛᴀᴋᴇ ʜɪs ᴛɪᴍᴇ, sᴀᴠᴏʀ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏ ʀᴇᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴ—ʙᴜᴛ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀ ɴɪɢʜᴛs? ᴛʜᴇ sᴇᴄᴏɴᴅ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛᴇᴀsᴇ ʜɪᴍ, ʜᴇ’s ɢᴏᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘɪɴɴᴇᴅ ᴀɢᴀɪɴsᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ɴᴇᴀʀᴇsᴛ sᴜʀғᴀᴄᴇ, ʜɪs ᴠᴏɪᴄᴇ ʜᴜsᴋʏ ᴀs ʜᴇ ɢʀᴏᴡʟs, “ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ɪ ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ ᴅᴏɪɴɢ?” ʙᴇғᴏʀᴇ ᴍᴀᴋɪɴɢ sᴜʀᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ ǫᴜᴇsᴛɪᴏɴ ᴡʜᴏ’s ɪɴ ᴄʜᴀʀɢᴇ ʙʏ ᴘᴏᴜɴᴅɪɴɢ ɪɴᴛᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀɴᴅ ʙʀᴜɪsɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴡᴀʟʟs.

ǫᴜᴏᴛᴇs

- “ɪ ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ ᴅᴏ sᴏғᴛ, ʙᴜᴛ… ɪ’ʟʟ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴀɴ ᴇxᴄᴇᴘᴛɪᴏɴ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜ.”

- “ᴛᴄʜ. ʏᴏᴜ ʀᴇᴀʟʟʏ ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ ʟɪsᴛᴇɴ, ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ?” (sʜᴀᴋɪɴɢ ʜɪs ʜᴇᴀᴅ, ʙᴜᴛ ʜᴇ’s sᴍɪʀᴋɪɴɢ ʙᴇᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ��ᴇ sᴇᴄʀᴇᴛʟʏ ʟᴏᴠᴇs ɪᴛ.)

- “sᴛᴀʏ ᴄʟᴏsᴇ. ɴᴏᴛ ʙᴇᴄᴀᴜsᴇ ɪ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ʏᴏᴜ ɴᴇᴇᴅ ᴘʀᴏᴛᴇᴄᴛɪɴɢ, ᴊᴜsᴛ… ʙᴇᴄᴀᴜsᴇ.”

- “ɪ ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ sᴀʏ ᴛʜɪɴɢs ɪ ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ ᴍᴇᴀɴ. ɪғ ɪ ᴛᴇʟʟ ʏᴏᴜ ɪ ɢᴏᴛ ʏᴏᴜ, ɪ ɢᴏᴛ ʏᴏᴜ.”

- “ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ ᴛʜᴇ ᴏɴʟʏ ᴘᴇʀsᴏɴ ᴡʜᴏ ᴄᴀɴ ɢᴇᴛ ᴀᴡᴀʏ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜɪs, ʏ’ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴛʜᴀᴛ?” (ɢʀᴜᴍʙʟᴇs ʙᴜᴛ ʟᴇᴛs ʏᴏᴜ ᴍᴇss ᴡɪᴛʜ ʜɪs ʜᴀɪʀ ᴏʀ sᴛᴇᴀʟ ʜɪs ᴊᴀᴄᴋᴇᴛ.)

- “ᴛᴄʜ. ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ ʟᴜᴄᴋʏ ɪ ʟɪᴋᴇ ʏᴏᴜ.” (ʜᴇ ʟɪᴋᴇs ʏᴏᴜ ᴀ ʟᴏᴛ, ʙᴜᴛ ʜᴇ’ʟʟ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴀᴅᴍɪᴛ ɪᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴇᴀsɪʟʏ.)

- “ɢᴏ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇᴅ. ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ ғᴀʟʟ ᴀsʟᴇᴇᴘ ᴏɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴏᴜᴄʜ ᴀɢᴀɪɴ, ɪ’ᴍ ᴄᴀʀʀʏɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ. ɴᴏ, ᴛʜᴀᴛ’s ɴᴏᴛ ᴀ ᴛʜʀᴇᴀᴛ, ɪᴛ’s ᴀ ᴘʀᴏᴍɪsᴇ.”

- “ɪғ ᴀɴʏᴏɴᴇ ᴇᴠᴇʀ ᴍᴇssᴇs ᴡɪᴛʜ ʏᴏᴜ, ᴛʜᴇʏ’ʀᴇ ɴᴏᴛ ᴊᴜsᴛ ᴅᴇᴀʟɪɴɢ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴍᴇ. ᴛʜᴇʏ’ʀᴇ ᴅᴇᴀʟɪɴɢ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡʜᴏʟᴇ ᴅᴀᴍɴ ᴅᴏᴊᴏ.”

- “ᴡʜᴀᴛ?” (ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴀᴛᴄʜ ʜɪᴍ sᴛᴀʀɪɴɢ, ᴀɴᴅ ʜᴇ ᴊᴜsᴛ sᴍɪʀᴋs ʙᴇғᴏʀᴇ ʟᴏᴏᴋɪɴɢ ᴀᴡᴀʏ.)

- “ʏᴏᴜ ʀᴇᴀʟʟʏ ᴡᴀɴɴᴀ ᴛᴇsᴛ ᴍᴇ ᴛᴏɴɪɢʜᴛ, ʜᴜʜ?” (ᴀ ʟᴏᴡ ᴄʜᴜᴄᴋʟᴇ ᴀs ʜᴇ sᴛᴇᴘs ᴄʟᴏsᴇʀ.)

- “ɪғ ʏᴏᴜ ᴋᴇᴇᴘ ʟᴏᴏᴋɪɴɢ ᴀᴛ ᴍᴇ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ, sᴡᴇᴇᴛʜᴇᴀʀᴛ, ᴡᴇ’ʀᴇ ɢᴏɴɴᴀ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴀ ᴘʀᴏʙʟᴇᴍ.”

- “ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ɪ ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ ɴᴏᴛɪᴄᴇ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ ᴅᴏɪɴɢ? ᴄᴜᴛᴇ. ᴛʀʏ ᴀɢᴀɪɴ.” (ᴇʏᴇs ᴅᴀʀᴋ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴀᴍᴜsᴇᴍᴇɴᴛ, ᴠᴏɪᴄᴇ ʟᴏᴡ.)

- “ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ sᴛᴀʀᴛ sᴏᴍᴇᴛʜɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴀɴ’ᴛ ғɪɴɪsʜ.” (ᴀ ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ, ʙᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴇᴀsɪɴɢ ɢʟɪɴᴛ ɪɴ ʜɪs ᴇʏᴇ sᴀʏs ʜᴇ ᴡᴀɴᴛs ʏᴏᴜ ᴛᴏ ᴘᴜsʜ ʜɪᴍ ғᴜʀᴛʜᴇʀ.)

- “ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ ᴀ ᴅɪsᴛʀᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴ. ʙᴜᴛ ᴀ ʙᴇᴀᴜᴛɪғᴜʟ ᴏɴᴇ.” (ᴍᴜᴛᴛᴇʀɪɴɢ ᴀɢᴀɪɴsᴛ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʟɪᴘs ʙᴇғᴏʀᴇ ᴋɪssɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪᴋᴇ ʜᴇ ᴅᴏᴇsɴ’ᴛ ᴄᴀʀᴇ ɪғ ɪᴛ ʀᴜɪɴs ʜɪᴍ.)

- “ʏᴏᴜ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴇxᴀᴄᴛʟʏ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ’ʀᴇ ᴅᴏɪɴɢ.” (sᴀɪᴅ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʀᴏᴜɢʜ, ɢʀᴀᴠᴇʟʟʏ ᴠᴏɪᴄᴇ ᴡʜᴇɴ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛᴇᴀsᴇ ʜɪᴍ ᴀ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ᴛᴏᴏ ᴍᴜᴄʜ.)

- “ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ʜᴇʀᴇ.” (ᴛᴡᴏ sɪᴍᴘʟᴇ ᴡᴏʀᴅs, ʙᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡᴀʏ ʜᴇ sᴀʏs ᴛʜᴇᴍ? ʏᴇᴀʜ, ʏᴏᴜ ғᴇᴇʟ ɪᴛ.)

- “ᴋᴇᴇᴘ ᴛᴇsᴛɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ. sᴇᴇ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʜᴀᴘᴘᴇɴs.” (ᴀʀᴍs ᴄʀᴏssᴇᴅ, ʜᴇᴀᴅ ᴛɪʟᴛᴇᴅ, sᴍɪʀᴋɪɴɢ ʟɪᴋᴇ ʜᴇ’s ᴀʟʀᴇᴀᴅʏ ᴘʟᴀɴɴɪɴɢ ʜɪs ᴘᴀʏʙᴀᴄᴋ.)

- “ʏᴏᴜ sʜᴏᴜʟᴅ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ʙʏ ɴᴏᴡ—ɪ ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ᴛᴇᴀsᴇᴅ ᴜɴʟᴇss ɪ ᴄᴀɴ ᴅᴏ sᴏᴍᴇᴛʜɪɴɢ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ɪᴛ.”

[beardburnsupersoldiers]

🥰

Second Shot (drabble)

Goal lines are Red, Neutrals are Blue… you might be a duster if you warm the bench through…

Pairings: college hockey coach Andy Barber x "the one that got away" female reader

Warnings: none really- family dynamic fluff, Andy and reader’s Dad being the best Girl Dad’s around 🥺, mention of kids bullying but no graphic depiction.

Word Count: ~2.2K

A/N: this was really fun to write 🥹 it was inspired by an Instagram post/trend. It’s not set in any specific time of the series- can be read as a stand alone. Thanks for checking it out ♥️

Second Shot Masterlist

Not beta read. All mistakes are my own.

The rabble rousing and cheerful merriment was not at all what you expected to hear as you rushed into your parent's house- assuming there'd be tears and all the dramatics of 6 year old emotions. Instead you heard your Dad's deep laugh as your daughters continued to shout with glee.

In the entryway of your parent's home you struggled out of one sleeve of your coat and dropped your bag and keys on the floor before kicking out of your boots. Andy must had heard you over the elated chaos coming from within the house as he was on you the moment you turned around, helping get your coat off.

"Hi, sweetheart" Andy smiled, all soft sweater causal and smelling like a Cedarwood dream.

"What's going on?" you tried rushing past him with not so much as a hello, determined to get to the girls, but Andy moved with you, "... they got in trouble in class?" you rushed, "what happened? Are they OK?"

The garbled voicemail you received from Lenny's teacher had cut in-and-out in the stupid cement slab of a parking ramp at work and all you managed to hear was something about Lenny, trouble and Lottie...

And sure the girls squabbled at home- but this was different- they didn't get in trouble at school.

"They're OK..." Andy didn't even notice he had moved with you again, blocking your path in a dance that you didn't have the time or patience for as he continued, "... it really wasn't..."

"Andy..." it can out as a frustrated whine, "Move! I need to see them... I don't even know what happened...."

And then he say it, the tears spilling over as you blinked up at him with so much fear in your eyes-your babies were in trouble, maybe even hurt and you'd be damned if...

"Hi, Mommy!" you head whipped around so quickly in the direction of that sweet little voice that you almost pulled a muscle.

Lenny came skipping down the hallway with an ear-to-ear grin and the remnants of a chocolate dipped cone - her favorite- all over her face.

"Lenny" you breathed out her name on a relieved sigh, "what...?"

"We got ice cream..." she stopped to lick a few stray sticky sprinkles off the back of her little fingers.

"I can see that" you laughed, the relief you felt quickly spreading warmth through your chest and prickling your eyes.

Lenny's eyes twinkled up at you with so much happiness -or maybe it was a sugar rush- that you couldn't help the relieved watery laugh that escaped the back of your throat, turning to Andy, confused as you wiped a tear from your cheek with the back of your hand before returning your attention to your daughter.

"Lenny, how was your day, sweetheart? Mommy got a phone call from..."

"Mommy's home?" Lottie's question was muffled with chewing as it drifted down the hallway, hearing her before you saw her- face and fingers covered in ice cream too, it had started running down her forearm to her elbow as she popped the last of a cone in her mouth.

"Hi, Mommy!" she beamed up you, a sticky mess- moving to hug you until Andy swooped in, scooping her up and whisking her back down the hall.

"Let's get you washed up...  for dinner" Andy added, the last part in a stage whisper - catching your scowl as the girls cackled as if they had gotten away with murder.

"They haven't had dinner yet?" you asked, following Andy to the back of the house towards the kitchen, Lenny by your side, her little hand in yours.

"Not yet" Andy at least had the decency to look a little sheepish as he cleaned Lottie up at the kitchen sink, wiping her hands and face with a wet paper towel.

"Daddy said I earned ice cream before dinner!" Lenny smiled, squealing when Andy turned on her.

"Hey, you ratting me out?... you little fink!" Andy laughed chasing her back down the hall and out of sight.

You bent to give Lottie a hug and a stealthy inspection- making sure she was OK.

"Daddy said I earned ice cream too, Mommy!" Lottie told you, "... cause I'm brave and strong..."

"You are brave and strong, sweet pea!" you agreed, "now... what happened today?"

You watched Lottie's little nose scrunch as she gave it some thought.

"Max was being mean again" Lottie scowled.

"Oh, Sweetheart, I'm sorry!" you blew out a sigh, pulling your daughter into a tight hug- your blood boiling because of that little shit. You really hated that kid- he loved picking on the girls- especially Lottie.

You were still hugging Lottie when Andy returned with Lenny hanging over his shoulder just as your Mom called from the dining room that dinner was ready.

"Andy, ice cream before dinner will likely ruin their appetite..." your brow furrowed even as your heart bloomed, standing as you watched Andy dip to hoist Lottie over his other strong shoulder.

"No, Mommy!" Lottie giggled, upside down now, "we promised Daddy we'd eat our dinner too!"

"Promised" Lenny's Cheshire like grin didn't have you convinced- even if it was one of the cutest things you had ever seen.

"I said they could have ice cream first because they both promised to ..." Andy's words were cut off by your Dad.

"Hope everyone's washed up..." your Dad poked his head out from the dinning room, "Nana’s made your girls' favorite..."

The girls nearly jumped from Andy's hold as they tore off in the direction of food.

"Bottomless pits" you laughed, shaking your head with a good natured eye roll.

"Oh, hey, peanut" your Dad added, walking into the kitchen and giving you a side squeeze.

"Hi, Dad" you leaned into him, "you need any help?"

"Nope, just gotta grab a salad from the fridge and..." he gestured to an empty ice cream cup ready to be discarded.

"That was your doing?" you smirked, knowing that your Dad had developed a bit if a sweet tooth since the girls were old enough to sneak treats with him, "Dad, you know they won't touch their dinner now..."

"I have no idea who got out the ice cream..." he winked at you before glancing over at Andy with a Fatherly approving nod.

"Am I missing something here?" you snorted, "if they got in trouble at school, why are they getting ice cream... before dinner?"

"Well Mrs Jacobson didn't get the entire story..." Andy started in, "she called because there was an issue with the Valentines for school..."

"What? No, way! We all helped them with their Valentines..." you insisted, "there was one for every student... even that brat Jillian..."

"I know..." Andy nodded, smirking as if he knew something you didn't, "but your daughter decided to add a little something to a few of them and a parent complained."

You could tell Andy and your Dad were having a hard time containing themselves. Andy's smirk threatening to turn into a full blown smile- even though he was fighting it. Your Dad laughing as he made his way to the fridge.

When you narrowed your eyes at Andy, pursing your lips, he pulled a couple folded Valentines from his back pocket- it had the girls favorite characters on it. When he handed them to you,  you noticed one was for Max and the other for Owen- both annoying puck hogs the girls played hockey with in past seasons.

You opened the Valentine to Max and turned it over to the added message from Lenny...

do better!

"Oh, my gosh!" you unfolded the other Valentine. Owen's simply said...

duster

All of Lenny's R's were backwards.

"What?" you chirped, "how did she... when did she?"

"I don't know... we checked them all when they were done..." Andy confirmed as you were just about to say the same. The girls had worked on their valentines at your parent's dinning room table last week after dinner.

"We finished them and then Lottie needed a bath so..." you frowned, trying to remember where Lenny had gotten off to during Lottie's bath.

"Dad?" you and Andy turned to your Dad who was at the kitchen island now, adding the ingredients together for the salad your Mom had prepped earlier in the day.

"Do you know who helped Lenny add those extra  messages to her Valentines?" you asked- knowing your daughter would've needed help spelling the word "duster."

"Lenny told me she wanted to add something top secret after you and Andy had gone upstairs to help Lottie and Grammy was finishing up in the kitchen.

"Dad... do better?" you questioned, "duster?"

Andy snorted behind you and you turned, trying to swat at him.

"What?" your Dad shrugged, adding another ingredient to the salad bowl, "it's a good message..."

"And Duster?" you asked.

"Well, I didn't know what that one meant" he admitted as you huffed in protest, "but Lenny said it was their nicknames from hockey..."

"They really are dusters" Andy couldn't contain his laughter and you tried swatting him again but this time he caught your wrist. You yanked it away but not before Andy's smile had a smile cracking your lips too.

"Dad..." you blew out a sigh, "it means bench warmer... like collecting dust..." you called after him as he walked out of the room, huffing your frustration when you heard your Dad laugh.

"Dusters..." Andy laughed, shaking his head as he left you in the kitchen to join the rest of the family.

"But why would Lenny add that?" you frowned, still siting at the dining room table after everyone had finished their meal. Your parents and Andy sipping their -after dinner coffees- as the girls played in the other room.

"She said Max and Owen were being mean to Lottie" Andy sighed, taking a sip from his cup.

"Then she should be telling the teacher..." you frowned.

"She said she did, but they keep trying to start stuff... she said that Max told Lottie that girls can't be good at hockey..." Andy looked like he was ready to commit a crime.

"What?" you scowled, "that little shit..."

"Mommy!" Lottie's eyes went wide as she climbed up into Andy's lap, "you said a bad word?!"

Your daughter's jaw was comically on the floor- your usual composure completely gone when those twerps were messing with your sweet Lottie.

"Yes" you confessed, "and I shouldn't have... I'm sorry. Mommy was not happy that Max and Owen were being mean to you..."

"Owen pushed me..." Lottie folded her little arms over her front, "... and I was crying."

"Oh, sweetheart" you leaned into Andy's space, cupping her cheek in a consoling way.

"But then Lenny pushed them" Lottie continued, "and they feel on their butts..." she giggled when you gave her a faux stern look that dissolved into a smile. Your gaze flickered up to Andy's where he shared your proud smile.

"Mommy, is Lenny in trouble?" Lottie asked, concern for her sister suddenly clouding her soft features.

"No, sweet pea" you smiled at her, "Lenny's not in trouble" feeling your heart ache when the sweetest smile spread across Lottie's pretty little face.

Andy watched in awe as the same smile spread across your pretty face- feeling a warmth blooming from deep within his chest.

From across where you, Andy and Lottie sat your Mom silently placed her hand over your Dad's hand as it rested on the table in front of him- she gave him a knowing look as he smiled fondly back at her.

"Hey, Papa... is there more ice cream?" Lenny's voice broke through the silence, skipping back into the room and pausing at the side of the table where your Dad sat.

"I don't think so..." your Dad chuckled, standing and gathering dishes, "but if you help me clear the table, I'll see what I can find..."

"Dad" you started protesting as Andy handed you Lottie before standing to gather your dirty dishes.

"I think Mommy needs some ice cream..." Andy gave you a wink that made your belly do a flip-flop before he left the room dishes in hand.

"More, ice cream" Lenny's words were like a battle cry, taking off down the hall after your Dad and Andy.

"Lenny..." you called after her, your warning -mom- tone activated.

"If Lenny gets more ice cream, I want more ice too" Lottie whined taking off after her sister as you rolled your eyes at your Mom, pushing up from the table to go after them. Your Mom just sitting there with that smile on her face.

By the time you caught up to your little sugar fiend gremlins everyone was shrieking...

"You think you get MORE ice cream?!" Andy in a half kneel as if he'd been pulled down to the floor- the girls attacking him from either angle.

"You said..." Lenny squealed though gasped breaths, "... that I was brave..."

"And girls rule!" Lottie added with a giggle- shriek. 

"Girls do rule!" Andy roared, reaching up and sweeping you into the family pile.

You couldn't help the startled cry as you joined the mix, laughing right along with them- your heart suddenly feeling so full.

"And boys drool" you shouted happily, rolling to your side as Andy welcomed you against his chest with an open arm.

"Do, better, Max and Owen.... Ya dusters" Andy shouted with laughter from the bottom of the pile while the girls giggled with delight- strategically plotting the attack on their parents from both sides!

The lovely and talented @firefly-graphics made the hockey dividers used in this verse ♥️

The lovely and talented @saradika-graphics made the heart dividers used in this drabble ♥️

[beardburnsupersoldiers]

Consider this post my early Valentine’s gift to all the amazing people following me and part of this wonderful community we’ve built! 💖

Az and Gwyn’s love story is one I hope to read. From the very first interactions, it was obvious that there was something special Sarah was setting up between them and when she went on to talk about the crumbs she set up, I had a feeling she was referring to Az’s chest sparking at the thought of her smile their playful banter. I’m dying to know what went down during their one-on-one dagger lessons! Not to mention, the way he looked at her with pride and admiration in the ribbon chapter and my fave, the way his shadows dance for her—it’s the perfect setup for a friends-to-lovers.

I’m thrilled to finally share this absolutely stunning and breathtaking artwork by @l.moon_art, whose talent always shines and is an absolute sweetheart. It’s so fitting and we’ve both been holding onto this beauty for quite some time. What better week to share it than for Valentine’s? Enjoy! 💖✨

Click the link to view on IG - IG engagement is always appreciated in addition to likes and reblogs on Tumblr.

Please do not screen shot and steal to post as your own content.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Luna (@luna.dreams)

[beardburnsupersoldiers]

Ohhhhhhh 😍

I’m literally fangirling right now don’t judge me please.

Manhwa: I made a deal with the devil.

[beardburnsupersoldiers]

After the emotionally shit day that I had….seeing this has just absolutely brightened my mood! 😍

Second Shot (5)

Chapter 5

Pairings: college hockey coach Andy Barber x "the one that got away" female reader

Warnings: sloooooow burn, angsty, reader has a lot of insecurities, single parenting, self deprecating reader, mention of lower income/single parent struggles, the one that got away, Andy not finding out right away that he's a dad, reader and Andy trying to navigate this new normal amicably, talk of custody and court- more specific warnings per chapter.

Word Count: ~8.7K

A/N: for those that have stuck with this series- thank you! I think this is the first chapter with a little bit of a hopeful ending. We might be heading towards happier times… who am I kidding 😂 - it’s me. I like ‘em angsty. Thank you! 🫶

Second Shot Masterlist

Not beta read. All mistakes are my own.

"OK... I'm officially impressed... you actually pulled this off..." your sister's tone was a mixture of awe and teasing as she watched the girls and a handful of Andy's players out on the ice.

You looked up from where you sat on the bench, lacing your skates and blew out a soft laugh when you heard Lenny squeal with excitement- being chased by Steve... or was that Colin?

"... and these are his players?" your sister smirked, taking in the eye-candy of 20-something athletes- strong and built from years of playing collegiate level hockey.

"Yes..." you stood up, awkwardly and took a shaky first step towards the boards where your sister was standing- admiring.

"Andy offered his rink when I told him I was looking for a place to host an ice skating party..." your sister's eyes twinkled with mischief.

"Some of them aren't even old enough to drink..." you reminded her- reading her mind.

"You can have plenty of fun without drinking" she smirked devilishly before you gave her a sisterly shove with your shoulder.

"Ugh... gross..." you rolled your eyes at her before turning back to the ice rink, your face lighting up when you saw how much fun the girls were already having- the party not scheduled to start for another 10 minutes.

"That really tall one over there..." you sister pointed to a player, "with the hair and the beard? I'd gladly take a ride on that..."

"Hey..." Andy joined you, your Mom and Dad close behind, "we got one of the team rooms set up for the party..."

"Wonderful" you barked the word, awkwardly loud, trying to cut your sister's words short as you pushed her out onto the ice.

"Hey!!!" she chirped in protest before you turned back to Andy and your parents.

"Thank you" you blew out a relieved sigh, feeling uncharacteristically happy- with Andy offering his rink access this was easily going to be thee best birthday party the girls had ever had.

"You need help with anything else, peanut?" your Dad asked, coming up next to you and putting his hand on your shoulder. Even with your skates on, your Dad stood almost a whole head taller than you.

"You've all helped so much already" you smiled up at him, pulling him into a side hug before turning to your Mom and finally flickered back to Andy- holding his gaze for longer than the others- "seriously, I couldn't have done this without you guys... thank you..."

Andy’s blue eyes twinkled, smiling back at you- he had been doing that a lot lately. Smiling. At you. Instead of scowling or arguing.

Things felt good. Lighter. In truth Andy was just happy to be involved and although there was still a lot left unsaid that you two eventually needed to address, he was enjoying living in this moment.

He was a Dad to two of the most interesting little girls he had ever met; his Charlotte- witty and smart with the biggest heart. Her compassion and empathy took his breath away. She was kind and articulate and knew how to keep her twin sister in line. And his Eleanor... Lenny- his spitfire- brilliant, creative and always keeping him on his toes- his tiny little hot head -burning a mile a minute- blink and you'll miss her. She reminded him so much of himself as a child... at least the child he was when he was wild and free and didn't have a care in the world. And Charlotte? She was what he had hoped he would have grown into- before it all went bad.

He didn't know it was possible to love as hard or as fast as he did your girls- two pieces of his heart he hadn't realized were missing until a few months ago- but they both fit so perfectly in his life now that it was hard for him to imagine ever living without them.

Andy blink back to you, he hadn't even realized your parents left for more party prepping- your Mom likely getting ready to welcome the guests- leaving you and Andy alone as you stood at the boards watching the girls with that soft smile that was reserved just for them.

"Thank you, again... Andy" you shared your appreciation for the millionth time, blinking up to meet a pair of glassy blues, "this really is the best party they've ever had..."

"It's really not a problem, sweetheart... seriously, you don't have to keep thanking me" Andy smiled, "I'm just glad I could help..." and he meant it. He had been itching to help you in some way, any way for weeks now.

"You should get out there..." Andy gestured towards the ice with a smile.

"I'm just waiting for..." as if on cue your brother and his girlfriend came up from behind followed by a lost looking pizza delivery guy.

"Hey, guys" you gave your brother a quick hug, "you can put your stuff here” you gestured to the benches, “skates are down that hall, just before concessions... and I'm just gonna grab my purse..." you motioned to the pizza guy.

"I got it" Andy said, handing a wad of cash to the young kid. Andy shook off your protests as the pizza guy blew out a surprised thank you- leafing through the wad of money, apparently happy with his tip.

"Andy... you didn't have to..." you started to say, following him towards the team room, a towering stack of pizzas in his arms that he wouldn’t let you help with…

"PIZZZZZZA!!!!!!!" you heard Lenny squeal out on the ice and smiled, envisioning a mad dash scramble -last one off the ice is a rotten eye- style.

"Sweetheart... I'm not letting you cover everything... especially the food, I got half the team here… I told you I'd help..." Andy turned back to you once you were both standing in the party room, not knowing where you wanted things to maximize flow of the whole party operation.

“The girls love having your players here” you smiled, “don’t think my sister minds it either” you giggled and Andy narrowed his eyes at you, playfully.

"You've already done so much" you added, taking a few pizza boxes from him and walking over to the smaller table where your Mom had set out paper plates and cups.

"I got some making up to do..." Andy's smile was a little sad and whether he meant to or not his words stung- making your stomach knot.

"Andy..." whatever else you were about to say was cut short by a rush of children and college hockey players rushing into the room- all ready for a pizza party!

~~~~

"Dad said the parenting classes are going well..." your brother mused, happily watching Lenny do a spin move around one of Andy's forwards- blowing the athlete's mind as he turned on a dime, chasing after her down the ice, "damn, they are getting really good..."

"It's a co-parenting class" you laughed when Lottie started chasing after the player that was going after Lenny- chirping at him the entire length of the ice.

"... and it is going well..." you looked back at your brother- who was giving you a really weird look- it kinda knocked you out sometimes how much he looked like a younger version of your Dad.

"I'm proud of you" he smiled, nudging you playfully after a few seconds of silence- your brother was rarely the type that got emotional or handed out compliments to just about anyone- he reserved all those for his nieces.

"Thank you" you feel emotion building in your throat before turning to cough it out- this had been an extremely emotional handful of months and you had been trying like hell to make it all work- for Andy... and the girls.

"Mom’s still not thrilled with him... she’s convinced there’s more to it… some nefarious plan” your brother added, "can't imagine Dad’s too happy either... but he’s not gonna show it.”

"I know..." you blew out, brows furrowing as you found Andy on the ice- he was wearing a helmet and the same team hoodie as just about half the men on the ice but you could easily pick him out of a crowd.

"What does he have to say about it?" your brother  continued, "I mean, I get it... Hen and Dan*” -nicknames your brother affectionately gave the girls after swearing they could read each other's minds, especially on the ice- “… were probably a huge shock... but what he did when you told him..."

"That's just it though..." you frowned, turning back to your brother, "ever since he’s been back he acted like he didn't know... like we never told him..."

"What?" your brother looked thoroughly confused, "what does that even mean? You did tell him..."

"Well... I think I told him..." that entire situation was all so confusing and honestly, it still made your blood boil all these years later- but were you and Andy ready to talk about all this? Things were working this way- for now…

"And what does Dad say?" your brother pressed.

"Nothing new" you shrugged, "he sent the formal letter... sent from the firm with his letterhead... they couldn't have denied it..."

"And Andy saw it?"

This was starting to give you a dull headache.

"A letter came back on company letter head with his response and signature... he wasn't interested" you said with a finality that your brother felt.

Silence now hanging between you two as you turned back to see Andy making teams for an end of party scrimmage. When his gaze met yours and he motioned for your brother to join them your brother grabbed his stick, tugging his helmet back on before adding, "well... maybe he hit his head while playing over there... and just forgot everything. Have you checked for concussions?”

“Not funny…” you snorted, shoving your brother back onto the ice and shaking your head as you watched him go- he definitely wasn't an athlete- but he tried- getting better on skates when the girls started playing.

As you watched everyone scrimmaging a heaviness shrouded your heart- making your chest feel impossibly tight. You knew you had to talk to Andy about all of this -he had asked so many times- but how do you go about it when he's acting like you never even tried and the thought of a custody battle made you break into a cold sweat?

~~~~

Your eyes flickered back to your phone, nervously as you tried to make sense of the message on your screen. Time forever pressing on, the month had flown by since the girls birthday party and you honestly hadn't seen much of Andy since- only in passing really - during hockey season his team was on the road a lot.

That's why this message was weirding you out. Not only was it out of the blue... you couldn't recall ever getting a text from him that wasn't about the girls.

FRIDAY NIGHT 8PM: DRINKS AND GAME NIGHT! BE THERE OR BE SQUARE.

You stared at the text with a furrowed brow for only a few more seconds before shoving the phone back in your desk drawer and getting back to work- resolving to ignore it- it had been a mistake- an accidental add-on.

He was having friends over apparently and he included you on his mass group invite. You're parents had the girls this weekend- but even so- there was no way you were hanging out with Andy and his friends.

You shook out your shoulders, trying to focus on what was in front of you but your phone vibrated in your desk drawer, again. Pulling the drawer open- you saw Andy's name on the screen and immediately picked it up- worried it could be something about the girls. He never calls you.

"Andy?" you answered.

"Hey, y/n" his voice was relaxed.

"Are the girls OK?" you asked.

"Yes?" his questioning tone didn't put you at ease.

"Andy... did you get a call from the school?"

"No... did you?" He asked as your frustration grew.

"No" you frowned, "why did you..."

"Are the girls OK?" he cut you off.

You groaned, letting your forehead fall against your open palm, elbow propping your head up at your desk as you squeezed your eyes shut.

"Abbott..." you goaded with a huff of laughter, "can you just tell me why you called?"

"What?" Andy was confused.

"Why did you call?" your laugh came out a little whinny this time.

"Oh, uh... Friday night..." Andy laughed, surmising that the girls were just fine, "I'm having a game night at my place..."

"I saw..." you confirmed, "the text..." you added as if he wouldn't understand.

"It's adults only..." he winced at how awkward he sounded, "and, um... I'd like you to come..."

"Oh" you sounded surprised.

"There will be other people there..." he rushed.

Why did he feel the need to add that?

"Um... thank you..." you smiled into the phone, "but... um... I dunno..."

"It'll be fun" Andy promised, "I'll get you a ride share if you wanna have a drink or whatever..."

"I can get my own ride share" you insisted, but your lips tugged at the corner as a smile stretched across your face.

"I know you can..." Andy smiled into the phone, "you don't need anyone to take care of you..." he teased, but his words unintentionally stung a little as you blinked away that prickling feeling at the corner of your eyes.

"Well...." Andy shrugged, "if you find yourself with nothing to do... the invite still stands..."

"Thanks" you suddenly felt a little sad, saying a quick goodbye before ending the call. You knew you wouldn't have plans- but Andy didn't need to know that.

Now- to spend the rest of the week convincing yourself Friday night game night at Andy's was a terrible idea.

~~~~

"And with the contributions from the silent action last month, that has already helped us meet our goal for this quarter" Betty, the president of the PTO committee at the girls' school flashed everyone her sickly sweet smile.

The room erupted in applause, pulling you back to the present as you joined in a round of clapping.

A few members of the PTO had roped you in to joining the Biweekly meetings at the beginning of the school year -guilting you into saying yes- as if you already weren't short on free time.

Betty smiled out into the handful of parents that also attended the meetings, waiting for the applause to die down before continuing.

"And the highest contribution came from..." Betty paused, paging through her clipboard as your mind drifted back to earlier this week when you picked up the girls from Andy's house- he had been making pancakes- the kitchen a mess with flour on his slacks. His sweater discarded and the button up underneath rolled at the sleeves. It realized, guiltily, that it was kindling for a lovely daydream.

"Lenny and Lottie's parents... where is y/n?" Betty peered out into the rows of chairs as if you weren't right in front of her- all eyes turning to you as you blinked back your wide-eyed surprise.

You hadn't donated... had you? Maybe it was your parents and you forgot.

"Y/N and Andrew Barber" your breath hitched in your throat, cheeks going hot, but you were too flustered to correct her so publicly, "contributed a total of $1500.00 to the silent action... with the winning bid on a romantic evening for two at Thompson's" your once fluttering heart plummeted- head first into the pit of your stomach as you realized Andy was kind enough to add your name to his bid on a fancy dinner for two- a date night he hadn't told you anything about. A date night that must be meant for someone else.

You forced yourself to smile, nodding to those directing their applause at you as you desperately tried to choke back the bile taste in the back of your throat.

Geez, Andy... a heads up woulda been nice.

~~~~

"Oh my gosh, y/n" Kelly's squeal came from behind you as you were gathering your things to leave. You braced yourself for her barrage of backhanded compliments.

"Hi, Kelly" you hopped your heavy sigh would give you away, unfortunately, the annoyingly snooty and put together mom of one of the students in Lottie's class didn't seem to pick up on subtleties. Her pack of other mean moms didn't either as they all descended upon you- crowding you in.

"So I heard Andrew put a bid on every item in the action" she sighed, dreamily.

You breathed mindfully through your nose, trying to stifle your annoyance- since when did any of them call him Andrew?

You blinked back to present as a chorus of coos rose around you while the pack all swooned.

"He's nice like that" you forced a smile, hoping it didn't come of as more of a snarl.

"I head he just missed out on the Disney cruise... I'm sure the girls would have loved that... I know how much he's been wanting to get them to Disney..." Kelly sighed.

What the Fuck?

Your heart was pounding so hard you were convinced they could hear it.

"And he won the romantic dinner for two..." she goaded.

You didn't take the bait, making a move to leave but she took a step blocking your path out of this hell hole.

"Did he mention who he's taking… on the romantic date night for two?" she asked.

nosy bitch

"Nope" your tone was clipped.

"Oh... well we were all just wonderin' who he's gonna take to dinner... you know Thompson's has the longest wait list... I heard Mary Beth say she had to wait 6 months to just get on the list..."

"7..." a voice came from someone in the back of the pack of moms.

"I'm not sure..." you blew out an exhale, slinging your bag over your shoulder and hoping she took it as the fuck off it was meant to be... You just wanted to get to Andy's and pick up the girls.

"Oh, Kelly... clearly he's taking you" a woman you didn't recognize smiled encouragingly at Kelly before looking back at you with a smug smirk.

"Maybe" Kelly shrugged coyly, "we've only been out a few times... I don't know..."

Wait... what?

Giggles from the mean moms made you feel nauseated.

"Oh, wait... this is awkward... did he tell you we were dating? He said he was going to tell you..." a smirk spread across Kelly's perfect red lips.

"Oh... um... no, he don't" you were too caught off guard to lie as Kelly's triumphant smirk turned into a smile.

"Oh... well... we are... and we've even talked about getting the girls together" she said, reaching into her purse with her perfectly polished manicure and offering you a card.

"Could you pass this on to him? It's my Disney travel agent's card. I told him I'd get it to him... but his week's been so busy... kids and work... and dinner with your parent's that one night... heavens knows how awkward that has to be for him" she laughed.

You didn't say anything, managing somehow to make your fingers clasp around the card she shoved into your hand before turning on your heels and making it to the parking lot before dry heaving next to your car.

~~~~

You got to Andy's place in record time, driving the entire way with angry tears streaking down your face- why the fuck would Andy include your name on his auction bid for a date with PTO Barbie? And Disney? He was planning a Disney trip... with her?

"Are the girls ready?" you didn't even say hello as you pressed past him when Andy opened the door- his signature smile stretching across his beautiful bearded face.

"Hey, sweetheart..." he greeted you with a smile that almost instantly turned to a frown while he watched you hurriedly gather all the girls' things as you rushed to get the hell out of there.

"Is everything OK?" he asked, shutting his front door and joining you at the little hooks and bench he had added into his entryway- specifically for the girls.

There were 4 little hooks. Enough for Lenny and Lottie, Kelly's demon spawn and another one that Andy and Kelly could add to their happy little family.

"Y/N?" Andy tried again, a little gentler this time as his hand went to the small of your back. You went completely ridged at his touch, freezing for only a moment before shaking him off and stuffing their things into their bags with more urgency.

He was confused. Andy considered himself lucky- other than your first encounter at the arena- he and you had managed to be pretty cordial since- even getting to a point where he considered you more of a friend then just the mother of his children.

"Everything's fine" you lied- but your voice had that hinge of emotion to it and Andy knew it. He knew better then to trust a fine.

"Mommy!" Lottie squealed, running up to you and hugging you around your legs, "we're watching Frozen II..."

"Come on, sweet pea ... it's time to go... get your sister..." you blew out a tired exhale.

"Sweetheart... it's almost over... you're welcome to stay till the end... are you hungry?" Andy offered.

"I'm not hungry" you snapped, causing sweet, sensitive Lottie's eyes to go wide with a matching whimper. She took off back towards the living room and you silently cursed yourself as you heard the pitter-patter of her feet disappearing into Andy's huge house.

"We're leaving, Andy" you continued gathering all the girl's stuff, feeling your face heat in shame.

"Did I?..." Andy's voice was steady and calm, dropping it lower in a gentle approach- the voice he used on the girls when they were fighting and it made you see red, "are you angry with me?"

"No, I'm not angry with you" you snapped, "I just need to get MY girls home..."

You saw the way his face dropped and you hated yourself for it.

How could you be so cruel? Even after everything you've been through- raising the girls on your own... you'd never once thought of them as only your girls. They were just as much Andy's as they were yours.

"Right" Andy cleared his throat, walking down the hall towards the living room.

The girls whined their goodbyes- sad about leaving before the movie was over and even more sad about leaving Daddy's house. It was clear who's home they favored more as you wrangled the girls into their booster seats.

"I'll see you in two sleeps" he reassured the girls as he leaned in, kissing Lenny on the top of her head before jogging around the car to give Lottie a matching kiss on her head.

When the door was closed you turned to him with a steely expression.

"I'm not sure Thursday will work..." you were just being mean and hitting him where it hurts.

"What?" Andy's face fell again, "but..."

"In fact I'm not sure Thursdays will work anymore at all..."

"Y/N..." he frowned, "I changed my whole schedule around for Thursdays..."

"I'm sorry, Andy" you shrugged, "but I don't really see how that's my problem..."

Y/N... don't do this..." Andy frowned.

You could see the anger starting to flicker in his eyes as you glared back at him.

"Sweetheart, whatever's got you so upset... can we just talk about it?" his voice wobbled, he was pleading as you got in your car.

"I'm not upset" you snapped, "and I don't think Kelly would appreciate you calling me sweetheart..."

Andy called your name as you got in your car, slamming the door behind you and driving away without another word- the girls waving frantically to Andy as he waved from his driveway- putting on a brave face long enough for you to disappear down the road.

~~~~

"What the hell?" you snarled, your hands were shaking as you handed your Dad the certified letter that had arrived the very next day.

"This is all pretty normal when couples are no longer together" your Dad said, looking over the papers. It had been years since your Dad had practiced law- retiring from the courtroom a bout a year after the girls were born for a boring research desk job within the firm.

"He's suing me?" the question cracked.

"Well... not suing... petitioning the court for joint custody..." your Dad corrected you gently.

"How can you be so calm about this?" your voice trembled, "he's trying to take the girls from me..."

"That's not what he's doing, peanut" your Dad's heart ached for you.

"But he is... Dad" you pressed your palms into your eye sockets, trying to stop the tears that you knew were coming.

The letter came as you were rushing out the door- getting the girls to school. You should have known it was nothing good when you had to sign for it and you saw the "From the Office of Goldman and Associates" at the top.

You had called in sick after dropping off Lenny and Lottie- braking several traffic laws on the way to your parent's house. You knew your Mom would be at her weekly yoga class, leaving Dad all to yourself- he was always easier to talk to about stuff with Andy.

"I'm going to call him..." you growled, standing from the kitchen stool where you had been sitting.

"As your lawyer, I'd advise you to wait..." your Dad tried, but you glared at him before leaving the kitchen. Your Dad heard his office door slam down the hall.

Andy picked up on the first ring.

"You're fucking kidding me, right? You're suing me?" you yelled into the phone, your voice cracking as an angry sob clawed it's way up your throat.

"No... I'm petitioning for shared legal custody of my children" Andy's voice was so low you could hardly hear him.

"Your children" you snorted on a mean laugh.

"Yes..." Andy excused himself from whatever he was doing with the team and made his way towards his office for privacy.

"My daughter’s y/n… I’m getting shared custody of them..." he reminded you as panic swirled in your stomach- tasting bitter like bile.

“Andy…”

“Save it for the judge, y/n…” he breathed out.

"It was never supposed to be like this..." you said more to yourself then him, tears freely streaming down your face.

"Y/N... you forced my hand..." his calm and collected tone was only making you feel worse.

"I didn't do anything to you..." you insisted.

"You told me I wasn't going to get to see them..." Andy raised his voice, "you are angry with me and you're holding seeing our girls over my head for it... that's not how this is going to work, y/n..."

“You get angry all the time…” you snapped.

“I’m working on that… and I never keep them from you… how can I when you still consider them yours?”

It was annoying that he was only speaking the truth.

"I am not keeping them from you" you snarled.

"You are..." Andy said, his teeth clenched.

"Well... y-you're planning Disney vacations with the girls and your new girlfriend without even asking me... how do you think the court is going to like that?” the damn finally broke as you began sobbing.

“What?” Andy’s brows furrowed.

“You know how much I’ve wanted to take them on that trip… I’ve been saving…” your words getting caught up in the bubbles of your sobbing.

"Oh, y/n... no..." Andy blew out a heavy exhale when he finally realized what you were talking about. He tried giving you a moment- your crying twisting his gut into knots and braking his heart.

Andy attempted calling your name to get your attention, but you were spiraling. Spiraling in your grief at all the moments you would lose now that Andy was in their lives.

You didn't even fight it when your phone slid from your hold- a muffled clatter against your Dad's office rug as you sank to the floor.

~~~~

You didn't know when you fell asleep, dozing in a sun puddle in your Dad's office like a cat. But you stirred a little, semiconscious, when big safe arms lifted you up, carrying you out of the room.

Your soft whines of protest died halfway up your throat when you sank into his chest- a comforting  smell- a smell you missed- a smell that was felt like your past, a smell you wanted in your present.

"I didn't think she'd take it this bad... I swear..." you felt his rushed murmur rumble low in his chest, you curled into the warm vibrations with a hum.

"How did you expect her to take it?" you heard your Dad ask- that calm under a storm, the sternness of his voice made anxiety flare to life in your gut .

"I... I don't know..." Andy blew out a defeated exhale, "I just... panicked... and pushed her too hard..."

"Andy, we've talked about this, she's not doing well..." your Dad sounded so sad, "she hides it alright... tries to put on a brave face for the girls... but..." your Dad got quiet as you felt Andy shifting you up his chest while walking up the stairs- they creaked under your combined weight.

"I already told you, I'm not going to stand by and watch you hurt her... not again, Andy" your Dad's voice was strained and it cleaved your heart right in half.

Andy pushed through your childhood bedroom at the top of the stairs- a space that was since renovated for the girls- two matching twin beds on either side of the room.

"I'm not going to hurt her" Andy insisted, his voice was hoarse and a little watery as you felt his chest tighten with each word, "I'm not doing anything moving forward without telling her... I promise... I kick myself every goddamn day for what I put her through... and I'm trying to make it right... it's time to make it right..." his voice cracked over the broken airy words.

Andy moved to set you down on the bed closest to the door, placing you gently on the mattress as he tried to ease away. You whined at the loss of his warm hold, rolling back into his chest as you sought the comfort of him even in your exhaustion.

Your Dad watched you with such tender concern before blinking back to Andy with a bit of a scowl- he gave the man a silent nod before turning to leave the room and closing the door softly on his way out.

Andy sighed his relief- his eyes still on the closed door. He knew your Dad wasn't happy with him the way everything had ended- but Andy also knew -or hoped- that your Dad still held him to a high regard. And there had always been such a deep mutual respect there- Andy hoped he could live up to the man your Dad was- for you and for the girls.

"Sweetheart?" his voice was so soft- loving even, "Y/N, I'm sorry... we both over reacted and I wish we could just talk about all this... I think it's time we..."

You whined, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him crushingly close- Andy didn't fight it- couldn't fight it. He ran his hand over the back of your head, smoothing your hair back into place as he shooshed your grumbling.

"I... Andy… I’m sorry…” you whimpered against his neck, unable to finish your words as you began crying again. Your head pounding.

"I got you, sweetheart..." he murmured as you clung to him much like the girls held on to him when upset and it made his heart swell and ache all in the same breath.

"You're OK... we're gonna get through this... I promise..." his big hand slipped from your head down your spine- not missing the way you shivered into him.

"Just take some deep breaths for me..." he whispered against your crown, trying to ease your arms from around his neck.

"No" your panic hitched in that word made his heart splinter in his chest.

"OK... OK..." he shifted on his haunches to give his knees a rest where he crouched at the side of your bed- effectively dragging you towards the edge of the mattress, right against his chest.

"Please..." the word trembled up your throat as your hands worked their way down to his soft sweater, fisting weakly at the fine material. You whined again when your pulling left him unmoved.

"What do you want, y/n?" Andy couldn't help the smile that tugged at his lips or the fluttering in his belly.

You had no clue what you wanted. Not to feel so sad all the damn time was a good start.

"Hold me..." you breathed out a huff of frustration, eyes scrunched shut as you rolled onto your back and Andy let you tug him with you, sighing softly when his weight pressed you into the mattress.

If you were in your right mind -instead of a panic enduced haze- you would have been as surprised by your plea as Andy was- probably even more so... but you didn't realize what you were asking for- and Andy didn't have it in him to deny you.

"I'm right here, sweetheart..." Andy murmured against your crown.

~~~~

You don't know how long you had been there- long enough for both you and Andy to fall asleep. Vaguely remembering the rumbling of Andy's soft snores with your head nestled against his chest.

You jolted yourself awake from the deepest sleep you'd had all year, smiling with the content feeling of rest- at least until you remembered everything that had transpired with Andy- this was really not good.

You needed to talk to your Dad. He'd fix this- you tried convincing yourself, arms stretching above you and reaching for the other side of the bed to find it empty and cold.

A momentary panic jumped in your chest, bolting upright before you remembered it was your Mom's day to pick the girls up from school. It took you a few minutes to calm that icy panic response before the brain fog lifted enough to notice your stomach rumbling.

As you made your way groggily downstairs you could hear the girls giggling as they played in the living room.

"Where are my sweet peas?" you called out- their sweet giggling a salve for your aching heart. But you froze when you saw Andy sitting on the couch as the girls were bouncing happily around him.

What the hell was he still doing here?

The coffee table had been moved out of the way to give the girls more room to play. You stared daggers at the back of his head as you descended the stairs.

"Mommy!" Lottie chirped, "Daddy's here!"

"I see that..." your smile, for the sake of the girls, felt forced, your nerves prickled as you willed yourself not to look at him. But then you remembered -what you had basically begged him for- and heat flushed your cheeks, hand going to your face to try to cover the flame there.

Did you really just snuggle with your ex in your childhood bedroom? An Ex that was suing you for custody of your children?

"… and he's staying for dinner..." Lenny squealed, jumping knees first into Andy's lap.

He ooofed out what sounded like Lenny's name when her tiny knees rammed into his chest- good you smirked before turning on your heels, ready to go hide in the kitchen.

"Girls, time to wash up" your Mom called, walking into the room while wiping her hands on a kitchen towel as she effectively blocked your escape route.

"I want Daddy to help" Lenny announced.

"Daddy will be right there, sweetie" your Mom eyed you and Andy both pointedly before ushering the girls out of the room.

You frowned in your Mom's direction, scoffing when she actually closed the kitchen door on you and Andy.

"Y/N... um... will you sit, please?" Andy started from the couch, "I'd like to talk... it's what I had intended before we..."

His words trailed off and you wanted the floor to open up and swallow you whole. Your heart was hammering in your chest as you prepared for another fight.

But you made the mistake of looking up at him- meeting his bloodshot gaze nearly had your resolve crumbling on the spot.

You shook your head, chewing on your cheek in an attempt to quell the tears.

"Y/N... please..." Andy blew out an exhale, "I don't want it to be like this... we owe it to our girls... please, if you can't do this for me, do this for them..."

"What does that mean?" you scoffed.

"You never tell me when you're upset... I need you to talk to me... I know this has been rough for you..." Andy blinked up at you from where he sat- you were still hovering in the doorway of the living room.

"I'm fine" you snapped, scowling at him.

"You don't look fine..." Andy instantly regretted his harsh observation.

"Cause you've got everything all figured out?” your voice was already beginning to tremble with emotion, "you're the perfect father without even trying and everybody loves you... the golden boy... and... oh..." you threw your hands in the air dramatically, stomping into the foyer and digging through your purse.

"Here" you chirped at him when you re-emerged- throwing the card in his direction. It fluttered through the air- landing on the floor at his feet.

"What's this?" he bent from the couch, picking up the business card and turning it over, "who's Denise Morgen?"

"Your girlfriend's Disney travel agent..." you were pacing now, "oh, she's also really excited about your date... and all the play dates... all the PTO mom's are actually... they can't wait to get a piece of Lenny and Lottie’s Daddy."

"Y/N... she's not my girlfriend..." he frowned.

"But you're gone on dates..." you insisted.

"I'm not sure if I’d call them..." he faltered when he met your murderous gaze, "uh... I don't know... maybe one... but I wouldn't even call it a...." Andy's words trailed off.

"And you weren't going to mention it?" you snarled.

"Why would I?" he frowned, looking back down at the travel agent's card.

"Because she’ll be around… and she's awful... and her daughter's a bully... the girls hate that evil little brat..." you were yelling, trying to blink back your angry tears.

"I... I didn't know..." Andy blew out a defeated sigh, his sank back against the couch.

"That's convenient" you snapped, "... well, I'm done with those PTO meetings... you can take my place until the end of the year... I'm sure your girlfriend would love that... maybe you can help out at Bingo night next month..." 

"She's not my girlfriend..." Andy’s voice had an edge to it this time.

"If you say so..." you said in a tone that let him know you didn't believe him one bit.

"I swear, y/n..." Andy implored, "I'm not seeing her again..."

"Well they all think you are... drooling over that fancy romantic dinner date for two package you bid on..." your arms were folded over your chest again as your firey gaze met his again.

"I should have told you about the silent action bids..." Andy's voice was already back to annoyingly calm.

"Better yet... just don't associate me with anything you do..." you paused your pacing and glared at him, "and I want nothing to do with her... or any of your girlfriends for that matter.”

Your eyes went wide when he ripped the business card in half, then in half again. You had to catch the smile that threatened to crack your angry glare- feeling a little smug as you watched him toss the card in a small bin next to the couch.

"It's not girlfriend or girlfriends... I haven’t called anyone girlfriend in a very long time..." he confessed.

"I don't care" you snapped.

But, you kinda hated that you in fact did.

"Why are you so angry with me?" Andy asked, "look, adding your name was stupid... but honestly, I was just trying to be nice and include you..."

"That's great, Andy..." you sneered, "and will I also get the pity invite on your family Disney vacations too? I'm sure your wife will be thrilled..."

"Wife?" Andy frowned, "do you know something I don't?"

"I'm not stupid... you bid on a Disney cruise for 4... and the fancy dinner date for 2?"

"Y/N... I threw random bids down on just about everything there..." Andy tried to explain, "I wouldn't do anything big like that with the girls without asking you..."

You stood there silently- arms still folded stubbornly across your chest.

"Do you honestly think I'd sleep with you if I was seeing someone?" he smirked. Did he find this amusing?

"We didn't... sleep together" you hissed the last words, looking around to make sure the girls weren't nearby.

"Well... cuddled? snuggled? what is canoodling exactly?” his lips curled into his lopsided boyish grin.

"I hate you” you grumped,” “I... was distraught... didn't even know it was you..."

"You told me you wanted me to hold you" he pointed out, his lip curling at the corner.

"I did not" you cringed, walking around the couch you were standing behind and sinking down on it- opposite Andy where he sat on the other matching couch.

"Y/N... I want to go to co-parenting therapy... with you" he blew out a heavy exhale, "the classes have been informative but I think we need more... and I already talked to the instructor Michael... he has an opening... we could start next week..."

Your stomach dropped.

"For custody?" your heart leapt up onto your throat.

"Well... no... not just because of that" he said, "I was talking to your Dad and..."

"You've been talking to my Dad?" you chirped, "now you're talking to my Dad?"

"Well, yeah..." his brows furrowed, "why wouldn't I talk to your Dad? He's a lawyer."

"He's not your lawyer, he's my lawyer... he's on my side" you insisted, petulantly.

"Y/N... there are no sides here..." Andy frowned.

"Of course there are..." you pressed.

"Peanut... Andy's right..." your Dad came walking into the living room and sat down next to you.

"He's not" tears instantly welled in your eyes, shaking your head adamantly.

"He is, darling..." your Mom echoed, walking in and sitting on the other side of you- she hugged her arm around your back reassuringly.

"Jeez" you choked on a watery scoff, "what is this... an intervention?"

Andy just watched you from where you sat across from him. Your parents flanked on either side of you- providing as much support as they could in this moment. It wasn't lost on you that Andy sat opposite you- with a stark lack of support.

You scowled through your tears, knowing you owned this to Lenny and Lottie.

"You promise you won't take the girls from me?" you asked, angry at the tears that were betraying you.

"Never, Y/N..." Andy scoffed- like it was the most ridiculous thing in the world.

"And when the girls go to Disney for the first time... it won't be with your new girlfriend... It’ll be me going going with them..." you were bargaining now.

"Of course, as long as I can be there too" Andy didn't even give it a second thought.

"And you'll pay for it... all of it" you were only half joking - but, even so, you were just mad enough to try.

"If you'll let me..." Andy blew out a warm laugh.

The room was silent for a moment, your Dad giving your shoulder a reassuring squeeze.

"OK" you sighed reluctantly, "I'll go to therapy with you..."

In a rush of motion, everyone suddenly stood up, your parents pulling you with them as Andy stepped forward and wrapped his big arms around you- pulling you to his chest for the third time today.

"I don't know how I'm going to pay for it..." your words were mumbled against Andy's shirt and you heard him snort a watery laugh.

"Don't worry about that" he managed as your Mom and Dad patted you on the back. The room felt so much lighter.

"Nana?" Lottie's little voice came from behind where you all stood, "can I have more milk?"

"Yes, sweetie" your Mom hurriedly wiped at her eyes, "of course..." she rushed back into the kitchen as your Dad scooped up Lottie and carried her away.

"Why's everyone sad?" you heard her ask your Dad.

"We're not sad, Lottie Lou" your Dad said, "we all just feel so lucky that your Mommy and Daddy had you and Lenny... we have happy tears!"

You smiled at your Dad's answer, feeling Andy's eyes on you as you turned to look up at him.

"Your Dad's right... I do feel really lucky that you had the girls..." he smiled, "I don't think I've ever told you that..."

"No... you haven't..." your words were hardly above a whisper, eyes going wide as he dipped closer to you, his large hand at the small of your back as he placed a chaste kiss at your temple.

"Thank you" he murmured against your crown, lingering there and breathing you in before leaving the room to have dinner with your daughters and their grandparents.

~~~~

"That's Lenny" your Mom smiled down at a tiny newborn Eleanor as Andy's soft smile made your belly swoop.

After the long day, you had decided to spend the night at your parent's house, you'd leave early the next morning to get the girls to school.

Once dinner was finished and bedtime stories were read, Andy and your Mom sat on the couch in the living room huddled around a mountain of photo albums.

"You don't have to stay... I'm sure you have things to do" you made your way back over to Andy- handing him the mug of coffee. The steam billowed out of his cup as he thanked you- placing it on the side table and edged closer to the arm of the couch- making room for you, sandwiched between him and your Mom.

"No... I wanna stay... I love looking at all these pictures..." Andy insisted, leaning into you, his face so close to yours that you could feel his warm breath against your cheek.

Your fingertips traced over the pictures of your sweet chubby baby girls as your Mom turned the page to when the girls learned how to sit up.

"Darling..." your Dad poked his head into the living room, "can I get a hand in here?"

Your Mom placed the photo album gently into your lap before excusing herself to go help your Father.

You moved over into the unoccupied space, trying to give Andy some room, but he followed, closing the space between you as his thigh pressed to yours. He reached for another album from the coffee table.

"Wow..." Andy's eyes went wide when he opened the album to a very pregnant you only a few weeks before the girls were born.

"Ugh... god... I hate those pictures" you whined, closing the album you were holding and turning your attention to the book in Andy's lap.

He studied the photos closely, a wistful look on his face before turning the page.

You groaned at the photo of you from the side- a weekly "bump photo"- your Mom had insisted on them. Andy's fingers absentmindedly traced over your swollen bare stomach on the page and it made you draw in a breath.

"I was a whale..." you insisted, self-deprecatingly.

"You were beautiful..." Andy corrected you, looking up from the photo- right at you- before adding, "still are..."

You both stared at each other, the silence making you feel a little squirmy when he finally added...

"I wish I coulda been there, y/n... I should have been there..."

"And you would have resented me for it... for the rest of your life... maybe even the girls' lives too..." you whispered, feeling a sadness wash over you.

"I wouldn't have..." Andy swore, "I should have been there... for them and for you."

"Andy, I swear I tried, then my Dad tried..." you blinked back tears that were quickly collecting in your eyes, not ready for this argument again, "you weren't an easy person to track down... no family... none of your friends even knew how to contact you... I was so scared..."

Andy frowned, turning the page -the day the girls were born- a grueling labor. But there you were, sweaty, exhausted and dried tears streaking your face- with two beautiful squishy babies, wrapped in soft blankets and beanies with light pink bows.

The next page was a picture of the girls' birth certificates. Your name was scrawled in a pretty cursive on a line that had mother written under it, right next to Andrew Stephen Barber, Father.

You watched him, his finger tracing over his name as he sniffled, his eyes going glassy.

"They've always been yours, Andy... I would have found a way even if you weren’t sure... I... just needed to figure out how they were going to be yours when I wasn't anymore…” the realization in that moment cut deep and you turned, bringing your hand to your face as you tried to hide your emotions from him.

The silence was heavy- sad and somber. The only sound was your soft sniffling as you fought to stuff them down.

"That had to be so hard..." his voice cut through your heartache, not expecting him to show an ounce of understanding, you blinked up at him- watching as a tear he wasn't quick enough to wipe away fell to the page of the photo album. Your eyes instantly welling with tears as you watched him crying.

You didn't know what to do- how to take away his pain or yours. Without even giving it a second thought, you leaned in and wrapped your arms around him, crushing the album awkwardly between your bodies as you gave Andy a hug.

"I'm sorry..." you whispered, "I'm sorry, Andy..."

"No... I'm sorry..." he hugged you back, just as tightly while you both cried, "I loved you so much... I need you to know that... our girls... they came from love..."

"Andy... I was so angry at you for breaking my heart... but I never wanted... I... I didn't want you to lose your dream..." you finally managed to say when the tears had died down and you were both just holding each other.

Andy pulled away, dipping low to catch your gaze as he sighed your name before pausing to collect his thoughts. But you pressed on before he could continue- the floodgates to all your bottled up unspoken words spilling over.

"And by the time I figured out I was pregnant... I had such a hard time contacting you... I swear... but then my Dad’s firm helped... and when I got your letter back…”

"What letter, y/n? From your Dad?” Andy searched your broken face, confusion etched into his brows, “When did he send me a letter?”

“No, Andy… what?” your response was cut off when your Mom walked back into the room, laughing cheerfully.

"I swear... your Dad would be lost without me..." her laughing caught on a soft gasp when she saw you and Andy in an embrace.

You jumped away from him- like a teen caught with her boyfriend- Andy clearing his throat as he rushed to gather all the albums- staking them neatly on the coffee table just as his phone started buzzing in his pocket. When Kelly’s face flashed in your Mind it instantly soured your mood.

"You...should... um... get going" you suddenly stood up, "it's getting late..." you added.

"Y/N, are you sure? I can stay… we can talk” Andy searched your face, his expression looking almost pained.

"I didn't realize how late it was..." you suddenly felt the fatigue of the day hit you like a Mack truck, your massive yawn adding to your cause.

"Yeah... OK... um, sure... sorry I kept you so late" Andy sighed, standing and following you as you made your way towards the front door. Your Dad walked into the room- about to say something- but your Mom put a hand to his chest, stopping him.

Andy tugged his dress shoes on in the entryway as you watched him- your chest feeling burdened with so much left unsaid. He stood, slipping his hands in his pockets- checking for phone, keys, wallet.

"I'm sorry about today..." your head hanging in shame, knowing Andy was only here today -missing almost his entire work day- because of your spiraling freak out.

"Please don't be..." he smiled down at you, "we've both got some work to do... and hopefully this co-parenting counseling will help."

You swallowed the lump building in your throat before looking up at him - worry swimming in your irises.

"Andy," you blew out a heavy exhale, "I'm scared..." you offered, truthfully.

Andy smiled, reaching for your hand and giving it a gentle reassuring squeeze.

"Me too..." his gaze was so reverent, "but this time, we can be scared together..."

* Hedrick (Hen) and Daniel (Dan) Sedin- twin brothers that played for the Vancouver Canucks often said to have played like they could read each other's minds. They were your brother's favorite dynamic duo in the NHL... until your girls came along.

The lovely and talented @firefly-graphics made the dividers used in this verse ♥️

[beardburnsupersoldiers]

by far one of my favorites gwynriel fanart 🤞🏻

Sarah, I just want them alreadyc ITS BEEN FOUR YEARS.

🎨. This was commissioned by @fiercehildr

🖊️Artist: Luciel art

[beardburnsupersoldiers]

Sorry… but I happen to LOVE when all my favorite characters live through a book. I read books to help escape my everyday sadness….i don’t need my books to end in sadness 🤷🏻‍♀️

[beardburnsupersoldiers]

No Place Else

Pairing: Ruhn Danaan x Reader

Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort

Prompt: "What are you doing here?" "I had no where else to go."

Warnings: Emotional hurt/comfort, toxic family dynamics, angst with a happy ending

Word Count: 954

Note: I can't decide whether to leave the ending as it is or make a part 2. Thoughts?

~~~~~

It wasn't supposed to feel like this.

Like your heart was unraveling thread by thread. Like the weight of tonights events had settled deep in your bones, leaving you hollow, exhausted.

You had spent the past hour walking through the rain, the cold sinking into your skin, numbing the edges of your thoughts. You weren't even sure how your feet carried you here—how they had made the decision your mind hadn't caught up to yet.

But as you stood outside Ruhn's apartment, rain dripping from your lashes, you realized something.

You had nowhere else to go.

Or maybe... maybe you didn't want to be anywhere else.

You hesitated before trying the door. It was unlocked. He always left it open for you.

The apartment was dimly lit, the glow from the streetlights outside casting long shadows over the walls. Ruhn wasn't home, but the familiar scent of cedar and smoke wrapped around you, grounding you in a way you hadn't expected.

You didn't bother turning on the lights. Just toed off your soaked shoes, pulled your damp jacket tighter around you, and curled up on his couch.

Waiting.

For what, you didn't know.

~~~~~

The door clicked open sometime later, and Ruhn stepped inside.

You felt it before you even saw him—the shift in the air, the way his presence filled the space. He didn't notice you at first, shaking off his wet jacket, running a hand through his damp hair. But the second his sharp blue eyes landed on you, he stilled.

"Y/N? What are you doing here?" His voice was rough from the cold air outside, laced with confusion.

Your stomach twisted. You didn't want to explain, didn't want to admit what had driven you here in the first place. But the words slipped out before you could stop them.

"I had nowhere else to go."

A slow breath left him. He didn't speak right away, just studied you. His gaze flicked to your wet clothes, to the way you were curled in on yourself like you were bracing for something.

Ruhn had always been good at reading you. It was part of why your friendship worked—he never pushed, never pried when you weren't ready to talk.

But tonight, something was different.

"Come here," he murmured.

You hesitated, unsure, but the quiet certainty in his voice unraveled something in your chest. Slowly, you rose to your feet, wrapping your arms around yourself as you crossed the room.

Ruhn's eyes never left you. When you stopped in front of him, he reached out—careful, cautious. His fingers brushed over the sleeve of your damp shirt.

"You're freezing," he said, more to himself than to you.

Before you could respond, he was already moving, disappearing into the hallway. He returned a moment later, a warm hoodie in his hands. Without a word, he draped it over your shoulders, his fingers lingering for just a second too long.

It was stupid, how much comfort a single piece of clothing could bring. But as you pulled it on, the fabric swallowing you whole, and you felt like you could breathe again.

Ruhn watched you for a moment, his expression unreadable. Then he sighed and gestured toward the couch.

"Sit. I'll make you tea."

You wanted to protest, to tell him you didn't need him fussing over you. But the truth was, you wanted to let him.

So you sat.

And when he returned, pressing a warm mug into your hands before sinking onto the couch beside you, the silence between you felt... different. He was close, close enough that his warmth seeped into your side, close enough that you could hear the steady rhythm of his breathing.

He let a few moments pass before speaking.

"Was it your father?"

You stiffened. Ruhn didn't ask just to ask—he knew. He always knew.

You swallowed, staring down at the tea in your hands. "Yeah."

A muscle ticked in his jaw, but he didn't say anything right away. Just exhaled slowly, like he was trying to keep his anger in check. You had told him about your father before—about the sharp words, the impossible expectations, the way he had a habit of making you feel like you would never be enough.

"He said he's done with me," you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. "That I don't exist to him anymore."

Ruhn was silent for a long moment. Then, so quietly you almost missed it, he said, "He's a fucking idiot."

A weak, humorless laugh escaped you. "You always say that."

"Because it's always true."

You shook your head, a lump forming in your throat. "It doesn't matter. He's the only family I have left."

Ruhn's fingers twitched against his mug. "That's not true."

You blinked. Looked at him.

He wasn't looking at you—his gaze was fixed on the floor, his jaw tight like he was debating whether or not to say something.

And then, softly, "You have me."

Your breath caught.

Ruhn had never been the kind of person to say things he didn't mean. He wasn't careless with his words, wasn't the type to throw out reassurances just to make someone feel better.

And that was what made it so dangerous.

Because you wanted to believe him.

You wanted to lean into the quiet certainty in his voice, to believe that maybe—just maybe—you weren't as alone as you felt.

Your fingers tightened around your mug, "I know."

Something flickered in his eyes. Something unreadable.

Neither of your spoke after that.

You just sat there, close enough that your shoulders brushed, the warmth between you something quiet, something steady.

And for the first time in a long time, you felt like you were exactly where you were supposed to be.

[beardburnsupersoldiers]

Overnight Guest | Azriel x reader

Summary: Cassian barges into Azriel's room.

A/N: Writers, please feel free to view this lil drabble as a writing prompt and expand on it!! That would be so fun! I've been meaning to spin this into a whole fic myself but who has the time. If you do, please make sure to tag me so that I can read what you've come up with! <3

Word count: 300

Warnings: Cassian

-

Cassian rarely ever bothered with knocks when he entered a room—it was part of his brand, his boyish charm. It was also the reason most of his friends had begun to lock their doors, so a pleasantly surprised smile tugged up the corners of his lips as he turned the doorknob to Azriel’s bedroom and the door gave way easily. His brother must have been awaiting him.

“Az,” Cassian barked as he entered the dimly lit room, spotting his brother’s bare back at once with his wings spread wide, and his bed a mess of cushy white comforters.

Cassian snorted. “I can’t believe you’re still asleep. There was a time when you were the first one in the training ring.”

Azriel gave a grunt without opening his eyes, and Cassian grinned as he leaned sideways against the doorframe.

“You should really open a window. It smells like a brothel in here.”

When Azriel remained quiet, Cassian grew impatient. “Do I really have to drag your ass out of that bed?”

The blankets moved, and for a second, Cassian thought that it was Azriel moving his legs.

It was only when nimble fingers appeared at the top of Azriel’s right wing to push it away gently for a pair of eyes to peek over the rim that Cassian’s brows shot high.

At the touch of his wing, Azriel gave a low groan Cassian could have gone very well without.

As a familiar face emerged and Azriel’s wing was lowered to rest just beneath a pair of delicate collarbones, Cassian blinked.

Y/N gave him an innocent smile. “Good morning, Cassian,” she said. “I think Azriel’s gonna need a minute if you don’t mind waiting outside.”

[beardburnsupersoldiers]

✨ 𝓕𝓲𝓷𝓭 𝓢𝓸𝓶𝓮𝓸𝓷𝓮 𝓦𝓱𝓸 𝓜𝓪𝓴𝓮𝓼 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓓𝓪𝓻𝓴𝓮𝓼𝓽 𝓟𝓪𝓻𝓽𝓼 𝓸𝓯 𝓨𝓸𝓾 𝓢𝓲𝓷𝓰 ✨

Happy Valentine’s Day! I had to commission my favorite ship to celebrate. I chose to post it with one of my all time favorite love songs. Every time I listen to it, I think of Gwynriel.

It speaks about a new kind of love where they’re falling deeper than they knew was possible. Something comfortable, safe, and natural. It’s easy when you find someone who settles the restless in you. When you find someone who makes the darkest parts of you sing. 🩵

Thank you @thesleepingfoxy!! You are so incredibly talented and I love the way they are looking at each other. I’m lucky to have worked with you.

IG post can be found here.

No reposts without permission and do not use this art for anti content please.

Characters belong to SJM.

[beardburnsupersoldiers]

✨Azriel worshiping his lovely priestess✨ for valentine's

"Gwyn let out a high-pitched noise that was nothing but pure excitement. Azriel, on the other side of the ring with the rest of the priestesses, half-turned at the sound, brows high."

"His attention was fixed on the young priestess, admiration and quiet encouragement shining from his face."

"Azriel went wholly still, as if he, too, had felt the shift.As if he, too, were aware that far larger forces peered into that training ring as Gwyn moved."

art by the amazing @/ohma4y_ on ig and commissioned by me

[beardburnsupersoldiers]

FFS I am obsessed with possessive/loving Az! Because he is definitely BOTH! 😍

The Hand That Holds

Azriel x Reader

word count: 5k content: [ explicit sexual content, explicit language, insinuated past domestic abuse, reader has a pos ex, physical fight, blood ] summary: You and Azriel visit a bakery in Velaris, but tension rises when your ex-boyfriend tries to provoke him. author's note: WOOOOOO FINALLY got around to this!!! i got this request a while back and im so sad it took me this long because i LOVED this one and i think yall will too :D as always, thank you lyla for the beta MWAH <333 ✦ . Masterlist . ✦

The chill of the winter morning nipped at your cheeks as you leaned into Azriel’s side, your hands tucked deep into your pockets for warmth. Velaris was still waking up, the streets quiet save for the soft crunch of snow beneath your boots and the occasional hum of conversation from the city’s early risers. 

Azriel walked beside you, his wings tucked in tight against his back, his scarf pulled up over his nose to block the cold. He looked uncharacteristically cozy, wrapped in layers of dark wool and leather—a far cry from his usual battle leathers. You smirked at the sight, biting back the urge to tease him. 

“Stop staring,” he muttered, though his hazel eyes were bright with amusement. 

“I’m not,” you said, feigning innocence. “I’m just admiring how approachable you look. Someone might mistake you for friendly.”

Azriel huffed a quiet laugh, his gloved hand brushing yours as he reached for the door of a new bakery. The scent of sugar and cinnamon spilled out as he held it open for you, and you stepped inside with a shiver of relief. 

The line wasn’t long, but the buzz of excitement was palpable—Velaris had been abuzz about this place for weeks, and you were curious to see if it lived up to the hype. Azriel stepped in behind you, the singular shadow that didn’t shy from the sun curling lazily around his shoulders as he scanned the small shop with practiced ease.

“You’re taking this very seriously,” you teased, nudging him gently.

“Old habits,” he said with a shrug. But his gaze softened as he looked down at you, his voice dipping low enough for only you to hear. “Regardless, it’s always good to–”

“Check your exits—I know,” you rolled your eyes playfully. But the soft, warm smile on his face made warmth blossom in your chest. Before you could tease him about how he always looked like he was plotting your rescue, the door chimed again behind you. 

The voice that followed froze you in place.

“Well, well. Isn’t this a surprise?”

It was like ice had slid down your spine. You turned slowly, already knowing who you’d find, and there he was: your ex, Adrian.

He looked almost exactly as you remembered him—tall, lean, with the same self-assured smirk that used to make your stomach twist. Now it only made your skin crawl. 

“What are you doing here?” you asked, your voice sharper than you intended. 

Adrian’s smirk didn’t falter as he spread his arms in mock surprise. “Same as you, I imagine. Grabbing breakfast on this fine, frigid morning. You’ve got good taste though—this bakery’s supposed to be the best in town.” His eyes, dark with amusement, stayed locked on you, deliberately ignoring the male at your side. 

Azriel shifted, a subtle movement that you felt more than saw, and the warmth of his arm across your back steadied you. You cleared your throat, gesturing between the two males. “Adrian, this is Azriel, my boyfriend.”

At that, Adrian finally acknowledged Azriel, his gaze sweeping over him with exaggerated disinterest. “Ah, the High Lord’s lapdog,” he drawled, a cruel glint in his eye as he let the words hang in the air. “I should’ve guessed.”

Azriel didn’t so much as blink, his expression unreadable, though the subtle tightening of his jaw betrayed his irritation. The shadow that had once draped itself lazily across his shoulders now twisted and writhed, mirroring the tension he refused to show. 

You stiffened, the familiar twinge of frustration rising in your chest. You shot Adrian a sharp look. “Watch your mouth. You have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Adrian sneered. “Oh, I know exactly what I’m talking about. You’ve always craved proximity to power, but I never thought you’d stoop so low for the High Lord’s lackey.” He looked at Azriel now. “You know, she used to–”

Before he could finish, a soft but firm throat-clearing interrupted the tension. You met the gaze of a female fae with skin the color of a summer sky, delicate silver patterns swirling faintly across her arms. Her green eyes flickered with mild annoyance, looking pointedly behind you. You blinked, realizing with a start that the line had moved up. 

You turned, giving a tight, awkward smile to her. The momentary distraction was enough to snap the edge off the conversation, but you could still feel Azriel’s muscles taut beneath his shirt, his posture subtly bristling with tension. You cleared your throat and turned back to face Adrian, forcing a calmness to your voice. “Adrian, I’m not interested in rehashing old memories. It’s over. I’ve moved on.”

He let out a low chuckle, clearly unfazed by your attempt to diffuse the situation. “Oh, I know. But it’s hard not to wonder if…” His eyes flickered over to Azriel again, a smirk tugging at his lips. “She always liked a good challenge. Always liked playing the game.”

Azriel didn’t respond immediately, his gaze cool and unflinching as he stared back at Adrian. There was no hint of anger in his eyes—only something darker, something more dangerous. The air around him felt charged, and you could feel the subtle pressure of his presence wrapping around you. He’d let Adrian speak, but it was clear he was no longer willing to let this slide. 

Your ex, clearly oblivious to the things Azriel could do to him, leaned in closer, his voice dropping low, as if speaking just to you. “You know, I always had a thing for your little… habits.”

“Adrian–” you started, but Azriel’s fingers tightened around your waist, as if to say, No, let him dig his own grave. 

He only glanced at you with that same arrogant smirk, spoke in that same smug tone. “You always did like the idea of playing the perfect little girlfriend, didn’t you? Pretending to be someone you’re not just to fit in. I’m certain the High Lord and his court see straight through you. How this one doesn’t is beyond me. Maybe he’s too caught up in your little act to notice.”

You stiffened, anger flashing through you. You met Adrian’s eyes head-on, your voice steady but cold. “You don’t know anything about me, Adrian. You never did. All you cared about was making me bend to your will, acting like you could tell me who I was.”

Adrian snorted, clearly enjoying himself. “Right. That’s exactly why you couldn’t stand up for yourself. Too afraid to rock the boat, too afraid to leave without your damned brother keeping me from you while you emptied out our apartment. That’s the real reason you’re with him now, isn’t it? Because he gives you the approval you crave.”

You felt your breath catch, a sharp sting of frustration and anger at the way Adrian twisted things. But Azriel didn’t intervene, giving you the room to defend yourself the way he knew you could. But his body still radiated that quiet, dangerous presence that was undeniably his. 

“I didn’t stay with you because I needed approval. I stayed because I was hoping you’d change, but it never happened. I was hoping you’d actually care about me, but you never did.” The words tumbled out, raw and real, but with a finality to them. Azriel’s gaze didn’t leave Adrian. 

But Adrian wasn’t done yet. “Sure, keep pretending like you didn’t thrive on being the good little girlfriend. You think you’re some born-again female because you fuck people in high places now?”

Before you could respond, Adrian’s voice rose, becoming louder, enough for the few other patrons in the bakery to glance over curiously. You could feel the heat of their stares on you, the attention making your skin crawl. 

Azriel’s posture shifted then, like a predator slowly unfurling from his calm stance. You were at the front of the line now, the barista eyeing the three of you warily. 

Azriel gave a soft chuckle, breaking the tension just a little. His voice, when it came, was unexpectedly warm—almost too friendly. “Go ahead and order, sweetheart. I’ll just get to know Adrian here a bit more.” His smile was polite, but there was something in his tone, something laced with a quiet, lethal amusement when he faced Adrian and clapped a hand on his shoulder. “I’ve been looking forward to it with how much I’ve heard about you.”

You blinked at him, unsure if he was serious, but with a last glance at the two males—Azriel now steering Adrian toward the door, his grim firm but controlled—you turned away and approached the barista to place your order. You could feel Adrian’s eyes still on your back, but you chose to ignore them, focusing instead on the extensive menu.

You’d placed your order, a cappuccino and cinnamon roll for yourself, an espresso and a chocolate croissant for Az. When you turned around, you found Azriel still standing by Adrian, the two of them in an almost eerily calm conversation. But Azriel… Azriel smiled at you as soon as your eyes met, his expression softening in a way that made your heart skip a beat. He waved you away, the motion casual as he gestured toward the tables. “Find us a seat,” you heard his muffled voice through the glass, all smooth charm. “I’ll be right there.”

Something in the way Azriel held himself, with perfect composure, put you on edge as you walked toward the tables, though you could still see them through the large glass windows.

From where you sat, you could only see Adrian’s face, flushed with color, but Azriel’s back was all you could make out. The conversation escalated, Adrian’s voice sharp and biting, though the exact words eluded you. It became painfully clear that whatever advantage Adrian thought he held, Azriel had turned it on its head. 

Your order was brought over by the short green faerie you’d spoken to earlier. With a smile and thanks, you lifted the paper cup to your lips, taking a slow sip. You tried to convince yourself that this wasn’t a situation about to boil over. But just as you brought your cup to your lips again, you saw Azriel—without warning—turn his body and slam his fist into Adrian’s face with a speed and force that made the entire room fall silent.

Your breath hitched as Adrian staggered backward, his nose already swelling, his eyes wide with shock. It wasn’t just the punch itself; it was the sheer precision of it. Azriel’s strike was so clean, so practiced. You knew it was far from the first time he’d thrown a punch, but seeing it land with such brutal efficiency… it was something else entirely. 

You shot up in your seat, stomach twisting at the sight, but a part of you was oddly satisfied with the outcome. Adrian’s shock was clear, but it quickly turned to rage as he wiped at the blood now dripping from his nose. For a moment, it seemed like time froze—Azriel’s stillness, Adrian’s growing anger, the tense air between them. You were frozen too, watching with wide eyes, heart thundering in your chest. 

But then, Adrian lunged forward, swinging his fist toward Azriel. You flinched as you saw it coming, but Azriel didn’t even flinch. He easily dodged the punch, his movements fluid and effortless. His posture was relaxed, almost bored, as he watched Adrian stumble forward, completely outmatched. 

Adrian’s face twisted with fury. He spoke with a sneer on his lips, and whatever he’d spat at Azriel made his fist come crashing into his jaw, sending Adrian flying backward. Adrian stumbled, but he was still standing, glaring up at Azriel with burning hatred. 

But Azriel didn’t let him regain his balance. He closed the distance in seconds, landing blow after blow with calculated precision. Each punch seemed to push Adrian further back, his attempts to retaliate nothing more than desperate swings Azriel easily evaded. 

The bakery fell silent, the only sound the sickening thud of Azriel’s punches landing with brutal accuracy. Adrian’s face was already swollen, blood staining his lips, but the fire in his eyes didn’t die. He staggered, trying to find his footing, but Azriel was relentless.

You couldn’t watch it anymore. Your heart raced, stomach churning with a sick mix of fear and adrenaline. You shot up from your seat, your hands trembling as you rushed toward the door.

“Azriel, stop!” you yelled, your voice shaky but desperate. You hadn’t even made it a step outside before Azriel’s voice cracked like a whip. 

“Enough!” The command was sharp. “You’d do well to watch your fucking mouth.”

You stepped into the cold air, the door swinging shut behind you. Adrian’s back was to you as Azriel loomed over him, towering like a predator who’d cornered its prey. The sight of Adrian’s battered face only made you more frantic. 

You couldn’t stand this. “Azriel, please, this is enough. Let him go,” you said, your voice trembling but insistent. 

Adrian, seething, spat a mouthful of blood onto the white snow with a sickening splat, his eyes not leaving yours. He grinned through the bloodstained mess, his voice dripping with venom. “The way you’re shaking, darling, sounds an awful lot like the noises you’d make when I fucked you.”

The words hit like a slap and anger burned in your chest. Without a second thought, you kicked him hard in the knee, sending Adrian crashing to the ground with a grunt of pain. Azriel took a slow step back, his expression unreadable. He held out his arm, a quiet invitation for you to take it. 

Without hesitation, you slipped your arm through his, feeling the calming presence of his warmth and strength, his shadow dancing around you too now. Together, you walked back into the bakery, your eyes lingering on Adrian as he writhed on the ground, nursing his knee. 

The bakery was quiet when you walked back in, but you ignored the looks from the other patrons, your focus entirely on Azriel. You reached the table where your coffees were still steaming and your pastries still warm. You grabbed your cup, hands trembling slightly, though the anger in your chest was beginning to settle. Azriel gathered the rest and you left the bakery arm in arm. The door swung closed behind you with a soft chime. As you stepped back out into the cold, you noticed that Adrian was gone. 

What remained were the footprints he’d left behind, the snow disturbed in jagged lines, and the dark spots of blood every few feet. A chill that had nothing to do with the weather crept over you as you and Azriel walked the other way. 

When you and Azriel landed at the House of Wind, his hand moved to the small of your back, his touch a silent reassurance. 

He opened the door, and as you stepped inside, the warmth of the House hit you like a wave, the sharpness of the cold outside vanishing. Azriel shut the door behind you, the world outside fading away as he turned to face you. The flickering light of the fire illuminated his sharp features, casting shadows that seemed to dance with his every movement. 

“Do you want to talk about what just happened?” you asked, your voice low, almost hesitant. 

Azriel didn’t answer right away. His eyes flickered to the firelight, his shadows stirring lazily around him as if they reflected the storm brewing in his mind. The weight of his silence settled between you, heavy and charged. 

Your chest tightened. “What did he say to you?” you pressed softly, searching his face. “To make you—”

Before you could finish, Azriel closed the distance in one swift step, backing you against the door as his shadows swept your drinks and pastries into some unseen pocket of shadowed space. The breath hitched in your throat as his hands planted firmly on either side of your head, caging you in. His wings flared slightly though his movements remained measured. 

He was so close now, his dark gaze burning into yours, and when he finally spoke, his voice was a low, rough whisper, with a smirk that never ceased to send a shiver down your spine. “Do you really want to know?”

Your mouth went dry, but you nodded, unable to find your voice. 

Azriel’s eyes swept over you, lingering on your lips for a beat too long. He leaned in, his mouth brushing against your ear, his breath hot against your skin. “He told me things about you,” he murmured, his voice dripping with restrained intensity. “Intimate things. Like the sounds you make… when your neck is bitten.”

His teeth scraped lightly against the sensitive spot where your neck met your shoulder, drawing a gasp from your lips. His shadows curled around your ankles, their cool touch a stark contrast to the heat of his body pressed against yours. 

Azriel’s lips hovered there for a moment, his breath fanning over your skin as you shivered. His teeth scraped again, a little harder this time, and when your breath caught, his lips curved faintly. He trailed his mouth down the column of your throat, his tongue flicking over your pulse point as if savoring every reaction he coaxed from you. 

“He said you’d melt,” Azriel murmured, his voice low and rough, the edge of it sending a shiver through you. “That you’d fall apart the moment someone got close enough to really touch you. Do you know how much I hated hearing that from him?”

Your hands gripped his shoulders, half for balance and half to anchor yourself against the tension coiling through your body. “Azriel–” you started, but his name came out more like a sigh than a protest. 

“He thought he knew you.” His hand skimmed up your arm, his touch almost reverent. He paused when he reached your jaw, his thumb brushing over the corner of your mouth, tugging lightly at your bottom lip. “Thought he’d learned all your secrets. But he doesn’t know you like I do, does he?”

His shadows curled tighter, slithering up your calves and around your waist, as if to hold you in place. Azriel tilted your head back with a soft but firm touch, his eyes dark as they locked with yours. 

“Does he know,” he continued, his thumb grazing along your throat now, “how your breath hitches when I do this?” His lips followed the path of his thumb, placing a lingering kiss at the hollow of your throat. 

Your body betrayed you, your chest rising sharply at the sensation. Azriel’s smirk deepened, satisfaction flickering in his gaze as his hands moved to grip your hips. He pulled you flush against him, letting you feel the solid strength of him.

“Does he know the way you tremble,” Azriel murmured, his lips brushing against the shell of your ear, “when someone takes their time with you? When every touch is intentional?”

His hands slid up your sides, his thumbs tracing teasing patterns along your ribs. You couldn’t stop the small noise that escaped you, half frustration, half need, and Azriel rewarded it with another scrape of his teeth against your skin, this time just beneath your ear.

“He said you liked to be bitten,” Azriel whispered, his tone dark and thick with purpose. “But I don’t think he ever did it quite right, did he? Not the way I do.”

His lips found the curve of your shoulder, his teeth pressing into the tender flesh there—not enough to hurt, but enough to make your knees go weak. A soft sound escaped you, and Azriel growled in approval, pulling back just enough to look at you. 

Your lips were parted, your breath uneven, and his eyes darkened further as they drank in the sight of you. “No,” he murmured, more to himself than to you. “He didn’t know you at all.”

Azriel leaned in again, his mouth capturing yours in a kiss that was utterly consuming. His hands roamed your body now, each touch a promise, each movement pushing you further into the haze of him. 

The kiss broke only when you were gasping for air, your head spinning as his fingers skimmed the curve of your waist. Your fingers curled into his shoulders, your nails digging into the leather of his jacket as he moved lower, his mouth tracing a path down your throat. 

“He told me,” Azriel murmured against your skin, “how your body would arch when someone dragged their hands down your sides. How you’d shiver—yeah, just like that, sweetheart.” His hands followed the line of your body, his thumbs pressing into the curves of your hips. Your breath caught yet again, and his shadows tightened their grip, mirroring his hold on you as they coiled tighter around your legs and waist. 

“Do you know what else he said?” Azriel’s voice was dark now, the edge of it razor-sharp. His mouth hovered just above your collarbone, his breath hot against your skin. “He thought he knew every part of you.” He lifted his head to look into your eyes, and his free hand moved to cup your jaw, tilting your face up toward him. “But he never learned how to make you come undone the way I do.”

His thumb brushed over your lips, his darkened gaze fixed on your face as his other hand trailed lower, unzipping your winter coat as it went. Your heart pounded as his cold fingers toyed with the hem of your sweater. “He said,” Azriel leaned in, his nose grazing yours, “the sounds you made when someone’s fingers slid inside of you were unforgettable.”

His fingers slipped beneath your sweater now, brushing the bare skin of your stomach. “As if I don’t already know,” he laughed dryly. “As if I haven’t touched every inch of you, memorized every gasp, every shiver.” Azriel’s other hand splayed over your hip, his touch firm, grounding. 

“I know,” he murmured, “how your body reacts when I press here–” His hand slid lower, his fingers grazing the sensitive curve of your waist before trailing just above the waistband of your pants. “And how your back arches when I fuck my tongue into you just right.”

Your pulse thundered in your ears as he lifted his head. His gaze pinned you in place—already held by the shadows, but his eyes alone could have kept you rooted where you stood. The smirk on his lips was devastating, pulling something deep inside of you.

“And I know,” he said, his voice a seductive growl, “that no one else could ever make you feel like this—not with just words, not without even touching you.” 

His mouth crashed against yours, swallowing the soft sound that escaped your lips, and any thought of Adrian—or the rest of the world—vanished entirely. His hands were everywhere, a firm grip on your waist, pulling you closer, his body radiating through every layer of clothing. You could feel the tension in his muscles, the barely-contained hunger in his touch, and it only made the need in you grow more desperate. His lips moved with slow, consuming pressure, as if savoring the familiarity of you, each kiss deeper than the last. Your breath came in shaky bursts, your fingers threading through his hair, pulling him even closer, if that was even possible.

You felt his battle-worn hands slide from your waist, roughened from years of wielding blades, reaching down to grip the hem of your pants. Undoing the buttons, he felt the fabric of the leggings you wore underneath stretch at his touch, the tightness only making him more insistent as he tugged. The chill of Velaris’s winter bit at the air, and though he’d been the one to insist you bundle up, he now cursed every layer between his skin and yours.

Azriel’s breath was a low rasp against your skin as he hovered just inches from you, his fingertips brushing against the curve of your body. The cold stone of the wall pressed into your back, but it was nothing compared to the heat radiating from him.

“Adrian told me…” His voice was thick, barely a whisper as it vibrated through your chest. His fingers traced over you through the thin fabric of your underwear, a silent command that had you arching instinctively toward him. “He told me you make the most beautiful, soft little sound—that you can’t hide the way your whole body shudders—when I press just right.”

He didn’t wait for a response, the air between you thick with something unspoken as his fingers slid beneath the fabric. The quiet scrape of his knuckles against your skin was enough to make your heart pound harder, but it was his words, his quiet murmurings that drove the ache deeper. 

“But I know better. You’re not quiet,” he breathed, his voice dark with something that bordered on satisfaction. “I know how you react—how you cry out and tremble when my fingers move inside of you.”

His thumb circled lightly, teasing, before pressing firmer, a rhythm that had you gasping for more, your hands gripping him for stability. It was almost cruel, how he seemed to know exactly how far to push before he pulled back, watching you with that same unreadable expression, his eyes dark with desire. 

“You let me feel it all,” he said, the words punctuating each movement. Without warning, his fingers plunged deep. A sharp cry tore from your throat, the sound raw and unguarded, echoing in the small space between you. “That’s it,” he murmured, his voice a low, almost reverent growl. “Let me hear you, sweetheart. Let me feel how much you crave it.”

The pace of his fingers quickened, each movement calculated to drive you wild, to unravel you with each press and curl. His thumb brushed against the sensitive spot at the heel of your body, and your entire form trembled under his touch. Your grip on him tightened, nails digging into the fabric of his shirt, but it was his control over the rhythm, his ability to play you like an instrument, that had your body surging toward him helplessly. 

Azriel drove his fingers deeper, harder, a steady rhythm that made your body tense, your mind slipping, thoughts scattering. Your breath caught, your chest heaving as you gasped, unable to control the sound that escaped you. “Please, Azriel…” The words barely left your mouth before another cry followed, the pressure building too fast, too much. 

He didn’t slow, didn’t stop. Instead, he bent closer, his lips brushing your ear as he murmured darkly, “I know exactly how you fall apart. How to touch you, how to fuck you, how to make you cry and beg.” His thumb circled before he pressed in harder, a movement that had your knees weak and your head spinning.

“You feel that? Feel how perfect you are for me? How badly you want this, how badly you need me inside you?”

You whimpered, barely able to form words. “I—I need you… please…”

“I know, baby, I know.” A breathless laugh escaped him, his fingers moving with relentless speed, their slick rhythm filling the air. “I know you can’t control how needy you get for me.”

You cried out again, in frustration this time, your body pulling against him. “Azriel… please,” you whined. “Say whatever the hell gets you off, just please don’t stop, don’t leave me like this.”

His lips ghosted over your skin. “I won’t stop,” he breathed. “But you need to tell me what you want.”

Your body was already shaking, your voice trembling with need. “Please, I—I can’t take it anymore. Please, Azriel… make me come.”

He groaned low in his throat, his pace quickening impossibly, matching the frantic rhythm of your breaths. “That’s it,” he muttered. “Beg for me, tell me how much you need it.” His fingers curled again, making you gasp, your back arching as he pushed you toward the edge. 

The tension coiled impossibly tight, and every stroke of his fingers sent a wave of heat coursing through you. His name tumbled from your lips, broken and breathless, as your fingers fisted in his hair. “Az—please, I’m so close—please, please, please–”

“I know,” he murmured, voice like velvet over steel, his forehead pressed against yours as he watched every expression flicker across your face. “I can feel it. The way you start to clench around my fingers–”

His words sent you spiraling, a raw sound breaking from you as the pressure shattered, heat rippling through every nerve so fiercely you thought your legs might give beneath you. He caught you, his free hand gripping your waist, holding you steady as he continued to work you through it, his fingers relentless, dragging out every last tremor until you sagged against him, boneless and breathless. 

“That’s my girl,” he said softly, his tone laced with pride, his lips brushing over your temple. His scent—smoked amber and shadowed pine, edged faintly with steel—enveloped you, his fingers retreating with an excruciating slowness that had your breath hitching one last time. 

When the haze cleared, your head fell to his shoulder, your breaths mingling in the charged silence between you. His hands steadied at your hips, his warmth pressing into you as though he had no intention of letting go. Slowly, his touch shifted, gathering you close, and you knew—without a word exchanged—that the couch would offer no reprieve from the unspoken promises lingering in his heated gaze. 

[beardburnsupersoldiers]

Oh buddy….Cass….I’m SO ONBOARD!

More Than A Moment: Part 1 - Cassian x Reader (AU!)

What? A post? A whole new fic? After months of broken promises (rip me)?

I sporadically got the inspo to write today and this idea just flowed on out and all but wrote itself!

Is this a stand alone? A multi-part (I hope so)?

Who knows!

Either way, I hope you enjoy 🥰

Summary: After a drunken night between friends, just friends, nothing more, Y/N and Cassian’s lives end up changing forever. But maybe not in the way they had originally expected.

Word Count: 1.5k

“Cassian!” You shout through the door, one fist pounding on the wooden frame as the other, hidden away in your coat pocket, held tightly to what had felt like a lifeline since you had raced to the store just over an hour ago.

“Cassian! I swear to god if you don’t open the door right now…” You took a step back as your fist met the air, the words dying in your throat as a girl with sleep mussed hair, wearing nothing but an oversized t-shirt that you knew belonged to Cassian, stared back at you with a look of distaste.

“What?” The girl asked, stifling a yawn as her eyes blatantly looked you up and down, a smirk spreading across her lips as she took in your frazzled appearance. “We’re a little busy here, so…”

You blinked at her before pushing past and making your way inside the small apartment, ignoring the girl’s protest as you beelined for Cassian’s room, stopping momentarily as the door opened before you could reach it.

“Y/N. Hey,” the man in question was straightening out a tight black t-shirt, having clearly put on the closest items of clothing he could reach. “I didn’t expect to see you today, especially not at 8 am on a Sunday morning…”

“We need to talk.”

“Okay, alright. Could this not have waited until a more reasonable time?”

“Cass, please…”

Clearly picking up on the slight plea in your voice, he nodded, a slight furrow to his brow as he studied you a moment longer before turning to the girl who remained bristling by the front door.

“Hey,” he started, beckoning the girl towards him, you cringed as you took a seat on the couch, not wanting to be a part of the scene that was about to unfold. “So last night was fun, yeah? But I think there’s a few things I need to deal with here so we should probably wrap this up for now?”

“Oh? So you want me to leave?” You rolled your eyes as she clung to him, battering her lashes in hopes of changing his mind as he led her back into his room to help her collect her things, not missing the daggers she sent your way when Cassian’s back was turned.

“It’s not that I want you to leave… But I’ll call you. Soon, alright?”

“You better.”

Barely managing to conceal your scoff you busied yourself with your phone as she pulled him down into a lingering kiss.

“Alright, well get home safe and thanks again for last night…” Cassian trailed off and your attention flickered over in disbelief as he clearly tried to scramble for the poor girl’s name.

“Rebecca. My name’s Rebecca.” Her icy tone was a stark contrast as she moved out of his grasp.

“Of course, I know your name. How could I forget? I was just deciding whether I wanted to start calling you babe or baby.”

You didn’t attempt to hide the disgust at your friend as he shot the girl a charming smile that had her swooning as she said her goodbyes - all iciness melting into a flirtatiously shy smile as she stared up at him from under heavy lashes.

“You really can be a pig sometimes, you do realise that?” You said without looking up from your phone once Cassian had shut the door behind the girl.

“What?” He asked, voice laced in indignation as he slumped onto the couch beside you.

“Oh I dunno, do I call you babe or baby? Of course I remember your name, random-girl-I’ll-never-actually-call.” You lowered your voice into a mockery of his own before being met with a pillow to your face as Cassian got up and headed towards the bathroom.

“Hey, I just got rid of a perfectly nice girl for you. No need for the disrespect. What’s so important anyway? You know I love to see you and all that, but usually not at this time.” He leant against the bathroom door, toothbrush sticking out of his mouth as he stared at you waiting for an answer.

Right.

You had almost forgotten that you were here for a reason other than witnessing one of your closest friends be a complete dick to a girl he’d spent the previous night with.

“Oh… Um yeah it’s all good. Get dressed or whatever then we can chat.”

Cassian stared at you for a moment longer before shrugging and returning to the bathroom. You slumped back as soon as you were out of sight, squashing the pillow Cassian had previously whacked you with against your face as your thoughts raced through your head. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

By the time Cassian was ready, you had had enough time to work yourself into a somewhat frantic state as you paced back and forth, trying to figure out how to even bring up the reason why you had almost knocked down his door on a seemingly normal Sunday.

“Jesus, what’s up with you this morning?” Your head whipped around to face Cassian, freezing mid-pace to stare at him like a deer in headlights. When the only reply you could muster was the very unsubtle opening and closing of your mouth, Cassian let out a sigh as he reached for his shoes. “Well, seeing that you appear to have a whole heap of pent up energy, we’re walking to the cafe down the street. Your shout for waking me up and prematurely ending what was sure to be a very satisfying Sunday morning.”

You scrunched your nose but nodded all the same as you silently headed towards the door, missing the concerned look on Cassian’s face as his eyes trailed your retreating figure before he jumped up to follow you out.

——

The ten minute walk was silent except for the slight crunch of autumn leaves under foot as the pair of you narrowly avoided the early risers who were jogging past along the footpath and manoeuvred around the copious stream of families with young children enjoying the crisp morning air; your heart rate soared as you tried to control your breathing

Cassian managed to score a secluded table tucked away by the window, thanking the waiter for the menus and water as you stared past him in a daze, your mind reeled of how to approach telling him what had happened, what had resulted from…

A large hand waving in front of your face had you blinking in surprise.

“Y/N?”

“Yep. Hi.”

Cassian gave you another quizzical look but was halted from saying anything else as the waiter returned, asking about coffee and food orders.

“Just a long black for me, thanks.”

You could hear your heartbeat and wouldn’t be surprised if everyone around you could as well.

“Y/N?” Cassian gave you a soft kick under the table, pulling your attention to the waiter who was looking at you expectantly.

“Oh, um… Just a latte. Thank you,” Shit. Could you even have coffee now? “Wait. I mean, no. Just a tea. Peppermint, please. If you have it. Sorry.” Your voice trailed after the waiter as he nodded and walked off with a shake of his head. So far, this was not going well.

“Alright, what has gotten into you?” The immediate retort of ‘um you?’ was held back by a bite of your tongue. “You better not be here confessing your love for me. I mean we spoke about this, right? It was just a one off, drunken night between two friends who both happen to be very attractive.”

Some of the tension left your shoulders as you offered a small smile in appreciation of Cassian’s attempt to lighten the mood.

“You’re not actually in love with me are you?” You rolled your eyes at the slight panic in his expression, deciding not to take it as an insult. “I mean, I love you, but, you know, as a friend. Because we’re friends. We’re all friends; me, you, Rhys, Az, Feyre, Mor…”

“Cassian,” you let the smile grow a bit as he prattled on. “I’m not in love with you.”

“Oh, thank god. No offence.” He offered you a guilty looking smile which softened as he nodded in encouragement for you to continue.

“But I did want to talk about that night…” You trailed off, trying to gauge Cassian’s response as he quirked his head to the side and furrowed his brows in confusion. Well, here it goes. Taking in a deep breath, you reached into your pocked and placed the pregnancy test on the table.

“Cass, I’m pregnant.”

----------

I have so many ideas for this and how I want to continue it but would love to hear your thoughts!!

[beardburnsupersoldiers]

Ahhhhhhhh! Yes please to part two!!!!! I just…she gave up her mate for him and he’s all- I need to explore this with her but you can be my side piece…faafo Az! 😤

First of all congratulations for 1000 followers 🎊🎉🎊🎉🎊🎉 it’s honestly amazing and you deserve all the best❤️❤️❤️ also happy new year 🎆🎆🎆 secondly, all the prompts are super good it, I had such a hard time choosing from them cause they that are all amazing, anyway I think 19, 20 and 21 just fit together perfectly for an angsty Azriel fic.

Broken Vows

Pairing: Azriel x f!reader

A/N: thank you so much anon, you're the sweetest! <33 And happy new year one month too late oopsie 🤭

Prompts: "I trusted you." + "Don't leave me now. Please. I still need you." + "Baby, please, just look at me."

Warnings: Az is not the best partner here (I promise he didn't cheat)

Word count: 1.3k

It must be a dream. A nightmare.

Whatever was happening, it wasn't real. It couldn't be. You refused to believe it.

Azriel was still talking, but you weren't listening anymore. His words blurred together in your mind, yet his first few sentences remained sharp, playing over and over in your head.

I've found my mate.

You had never been the jealous type, so it hadn't bothered you when he began spending more and more time with Madja’s new apprentice. It had started as small talk after her visits and you usually lingered too. Talya seemed nice enough—quiet and reserved yet friendly.

You hadn't questioned it when Azriel started visiting the apothecary for even the slightest headache. But then those visits became too frequent. He went there even when both of you felt perfectly fine.

You should have realized something was off when Azriel became distant. The signs had been there. You had just been too blind to see them.

But the problem wasn't that he had found his mate, was it?

I want to be with her.

A few simple words, and the whole world collapsed around you.

“Baby, please, just look at me.” His voice finally cut through your thoughts. “I know this is hard to hear, but let me—”

“You promised,” you interrupted him. Your eyes met his from where he sat at the other end of the couch.

“Baby…” he began, but you cut him off again.

“You promised,” you repeated, your voice rising as tears pricked your eyes. “You promised!”

Guilt flashed across Azriel's face, and he at least had the decency to remain silent as you pressed on.

“You said you'd reject your mate for me, Az,” you blurted out. Hot, angry tears rolled down your cheeks, but you barely noticed. “It was in your wedding vows, for gods’ sake!”

Azriel shook his head. “It's not that simple. I don't—”

“Isn't it?” you interrupted again. “Because it seems simple enough to me. You just reject the bond, like I did.”

His expression immediately hardened. “I don't want to reject the bond. If you would only let—”

“Why wouldn't you want to reject it?” you demanded.

“Because she's my mate!”

“And I'm your wife!”

For a moment, you just glared at each other. His shadows swarmed nervously around his wings, but then his shoulders slumped and his expression softened slightly.

“Can you let me explain?” he asked, studying you. “Please.”

With a sigh, you wiped your cheeks before crossing your arms over your chest. You simply looked at him, waiting.

“I don't want to lose you, baby,” he said softly.

“I don't see how that is going—”

Azriel stopped you mid-sentence. “Let me finish? Please?”

You rolled your eyes but gestured for him to continue. Listening to him was the last thing you wanted right now, but maybe he was going to surprise you. Maybe he was going to say it was all just a joke, a prank, and you'd be mad, but it would be fine.

You were grasping at straws, and you knew it.

“I still want to be with you,” Azriel said. He shot you a sharp look when you opened your mouth, and you sank back against the couch to let him continue. “But I also want to explore this bond with her.”

You scoffed. “So what? You think you can have both of us?” You shook your head, something vicious twisting in your gut. “That's not going to work, Azriel.”

You rose from your seat to head upstairs. You needed time to think, to figure out what to do. If you stayed, you would only get angrier. You had already cried and had no desire to do it again. But if you left, maybe you could spare yourself the fury.

Though the pain—the ache in your heart—could not be avoided, no matter what you did.

“Talya said that she understands the situation and she'd be willing to—”

You froze on the spot. Azriel must have realized he'd said the wrong thing because he didn't finish the sentence. His eyes dropped to your clenched fists as you turned back to face him.

Your restraint was gone. You wouldn't hold back now.

“You talked to her before you talked to me?” you seethed.

“Well, I…” Azriel seemed to be grasping for words. “She's my mate,” he repeated, as if that was explanation enough.

“And I'm your wife!” You threw your hands up. “I have been for the last two centuries!”

“I'm sorry, baby, but I—”

“Don't you ‘baby’ me, Azriel!”

He lowered his gaze, but you were too upset to care about the hurt look in his eyes. It was nowhere close to the heartache he was causing you.

“You know why I never worried about you finding your mate?” you asked. He looked up at you, but even if he had planned on saying something, you didn't give him time. “Because you promised you'd choose me. You promised you would reject the bond. And I believed it, believed you. I trusted you.”

You were well aware of what rejecting a mating bond felt like, how difficult it could be to deal with. Even without feelings involved, even knowing that you and your mate wouldn't have been a good match, it had still taken you two weeks to feel whole again. But Azriel had been there, filling the empty spot where your bond had been with his love.

You had never regretted your choice. You never had a reason to.

“And now I find out that not only did you spend time with her knowing she was your mate,” you went on, “but that you also want to be with her?”

Azriel’s voice was firm, edged with frustration. “I told you I want to be with you too, didn’t I?”

“Mother above, Azriel,” you snapped. “You think that makes me feel better? I trusted you, but you didn't even try.”

You had fought before. After two hundred years together, arguments were inevitable. But you usually talked it out and reconciled after a few hours—a day at worst. Maybe that was why Azriel didn't look particularly concerned.

Until you slipped the wedding band off your finger and tossed it onto the couch beside him.

His eyes widened in shock, and his usually restless shadows stilled behind him. You both stared at the ring, the silence stretching as your anger faded, leaving behind only a broken heart.

“You can't have your cake and eat it too, Az,” you finally said, your voice calmer now, resigned.

You turned on your heel again.

“I'm leaving,” you announced, already walking toward the stairs. You could go stay with your parents. They would welcome you without pressing for an explanation.

Azriel snapped out of his stupor and stood, reaching for you.

“Don’t leave me now. Please. I still need you.” His fingers closed around your wrist. “I still love you.”

You yanked your arm free, but didn't turn to face him. You couldn’t bring yourself to look at him as you bit out, “You should have loved me enough not to pursue your mate. You promised.”

He tried to stop you again, his shadows swirling around your legs as if to keep you from walking away from their master.

“Baby, that's not—”

You turned back one last time. Tears lined your eyes and your voice broke on the words. “I should have been enough, Azriel.”

You didn't wait to hear his response. You didn't try to go upstairs to pack some clothes.

Unable to stomach his presence any longer, you winnowed away.

a/n: technically, this is the end. I wanted to leave it open and hanging, but the more I think about it, the more I realize that I am a sucker for happy endings so I might write a part 2 bc I already have an idea :))

Taglist: @mrsjna @navyblue-eternity @paintedbyshadows @highladyandromeda @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @azrielsmate3 @mollygetssherlockcoffee @mirandasidefics @tinystarfishgalaxy @cynthiesjmxazrielslover @anarchiii @readinggeeklmao @anneas11 @azrielslittleslut @lilah-asteria @aaahhh127 @lorosette @azrielsrealmate @pey2618 @mellowmusings @k8r123-blog @daughterofthemoons-stuff @minnieoo @saltedcoffeescotch @georgiadixon

1k taglist: @onebadassunicorn @thegoddessofnothingness

[beardburnsupersoldiers]

I’m excited for this movie. Only thing that makes me sad is no Sam and Bucky broship ☹️ Captain America can hang with the Thunderbolts!

Marvel Studios' Thunderbolts (2025) Big Game Trailer