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🛞

A tire…

your 12th emoji is how you'll die

☕️

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Now that’s wholesome

Jaune being his normal kind, helpful lovable self causes women like Illia, Terra, and others to fall for him

LAJA

Coco: And, welcome everyone to the first meeting of the, LAJA. Lesbians Against Jaune Arc. My name is, Coco Adel, club chairwoman, and founder.

Coco: Now, since this is out first meeting we will each introduce ourselves, and tell everyone why you decided to become a member of the, LAJA. I'll go first...

Coco: I am a loud, and proud lesbian, I saw some guys, and I thought they were attractive, from as aesthetic perspective not anything romantic, or sexual. But, one day, I was trying on an outfit with my BunBun...

Ilia: Hold up! Your 'BunBun?'

Coco: Oh yeah, that's a nickname for my teammate, Velvet. She's a rabbit faunas.

Ilia: Ohh!

Terra: I like that.

Coco: Velvet isn't that good at fashion, but Jaune was there, he saw my outfit, and said no. Gave me some other clothes, and told me top try it on... and son of a bitch that was the greatest outfit I've ever worn!

Coco: After that, the two of us would go out, and do some fashion shows with each other, and some other people who needed a new wardrobe. It is fun, really fun hanging out with him. So, one day when we're having fun this random woman came up, and ask if, Jaune was single. And, Jaune was single... but, I said he wasn't... that I was his girlfriend...

Coco: I'm a hardcore lesbian! I never thought of dating a guy in my entire life! But, to keep some random floozie from, Jaune I said I was his girlfriend... I don't want to lose my fashion friend, my best male friend. And, I'm sad that I'm not... And, I really... I really want to be his girlfriend... So... yeah...

Terra: You fell because of his fashion sense? Makes sense, Jaune has superb taste in woman's fashion.

Coco: He did, I was looking at a wedding dress one day, and who is at the alter, Jaune freaking Arc...

Yang: Oh you got it bad!

Coco: Okay... You're turn.

Ilia: Okay... Hello everyone, my name is Ilia Amitola, I am a chameleon faunas, I can changed the colour of my skin. So, I was a former member of the, White Fang, I was a lesbian since I was in the, White Fang, and I hated humans on top of that. Then this stupid blond human just shows up, he flashes me that pearly smile of his. And, my body just changed to pink!

Coco: Like it did just now?

Ilia: Yes?! I just looked at him, and I thought how much I wanted to sleep with this guy! A guy, a human guy at that! It's just a crush, there's nothing more about it! So, I decided to learn things about him, I'd learn that one thing to make him the worst person I could possibly imagine!

Ilia: And, what I learned is that he is one of the nicest, sweetest guys I've ever met! He doesn't hate the faunas! He supports the, White Fang! To a point! He doesn't like the more radical side...

Yang: No one does.

Ilia: But, all I learned how a sweet caring a person he is! Then I saw him watch over some faunas kid one day, and the next thing I know, I'm thinking about having kids with him! This it total bullshit!

Coco: She's still blushing.

Emerald: It is a nice shade of pink.

Terra: Well... speaking of babies... My name is, Terra Cotta Arc...

Coco: Arc? Are you related to, Jaune?

Terra: In a way, I am married to a woman called, Saphron Cotta Arc. She is, Jaune's older sister, making, Jaune my brother-in-law. And, for a while I thought I was asexual, I was never interested in anyone. But, then I met my wife, and well eventually I married her. And, I'm happily married! But, then I met, Jaune, and if I met him before I met my wife, we probably would be married with three kids by now. Right now we only have the one though.

Coco: T-The one...?

Terra: I wanted a kid, so I asked, Jaune to... donate so I could have one. And, this is my son, Adrian~!

Yang: Oh gods he is so adorable~!

Ilia: Noooo... Don't do this to me, I've been trying to get rid of the baby craze!

Terra: And, well... I want another... maybe two... N-Next...!

Yang: Okay... glad I'm not the only one... Ahem! Hi! My name is, Yang Xiao Long, and I'm not really a lesbian, I always thought I was more of a bisexual. I always thought, woman, and men were attractive. And, when I came here to, Beacon the lesbian drive kicked into overdrive! I mean come on! There are so many hot woman here!

Coco: It's a buffet here!

Yang: And, my teammate is, Blake Belladonna! How many people didn't get a aroused , and want to smash that phat ass!

Ilia: Preach sister!

Yang: But then, Jaune Arc came around, and started acting like a big brother figure to my little sister! He looked after her, he comforted her when she was sad, he made her cookies! That was my job! But, all of a sudden big bro came in and stole my job! And, that's were all hell let loose!

Yang: So, I confronted him one day to leave her alone, to stop being her 'big brother,' that it was my job to do those things, because I am her big sister. But, he told me not to worry, since I was her big sister, and i would always be her big sister. So, he told me not to worry 'little sister.' He calmed me, 'little sister' rubbed the top of my head, and left. And, I swear to gods... I came when he patted my head!

Coco: Seriously?!

Terra: I'd buy that.

Yang: I don't like people touching my hair, but he just patted once, and he sent me so over the edge that, that's what happened?! I want, no need him to do it again!

Yang: I want my big brother to hold me in his arms, to comfort me when I'm sad, to run his fingers through my hair to calm me. And, above all I want him to spank my ass as he calls me his bitch, while I scream big bro as he takes me from behind! I used to imagine doing that to, Blake, and her phat ass! Now, I want, Jaune to be doing that to me!

Coco: (Whistles~!) You got it bad girl.

Terra: Really bad... Now tell us how you want him to do this, I need to know.

Yang: You're turn, Emerald.

Emerald: Okay... My name is Emerald Sustari. I am a lesbian, least I was... honestly I think I'm not that much of a lesbian, I was interested in my team leader. Her name is, Cinder Fall. She took me in, when no one else would, so I kinda fell for her from an emotional stand point. But, Cinder never saw me from that angle... she's more focused on how she can use me for her own gains. This often made me cry, that she didn't care about me... Then one day, Jaune found me when I was crying, and we just started talking. He became a shoulder I could cry on, someone I could go to for support, or just someone I could be around when I needed something.

Emerald: Then... then his mother came by, and he introduced me to her... And, I understood why, Jaune was such a nice, and caring person. And, I asked, Jaune's mom. Juniper if she would adopt me, so I could finally have the mother figure I always wanted.

Yang: What did she say?

Emerald: She said no.

Terra: What?! But, Juniper is such a lovely woman, why did she say no?

Emerald: Because she knows how much I love, Jaune, and that if I married him she would still become my mom. So, I get the best of both worlds. A mom, and the man I love...

Terra: Oh...

Yang: Now that's a good deal right there...

Coco: Alright... now that everyone has been introduced, we shall now begin the first meeting with the, LAJA. Does anyone have an items they wish to bring to the table.

Ilia: Yeah, I have one... We're calling ourselves the, Lesbians Against, Jaune Arc. But, how are we against, Jaune? I mean... we all want to sleep with the guy... that doesn't sound so 'against' now does it?

Coco: Uhh... cause I thought everyone would be upset, Jaune turned us straight. So, we would be against him, because of that.

Ilia: That makes sense, but in reality... we want to fuck him...

Yang: Yeah, we all want to sleep with the guy to one degree, or the other.

Terra: So how are we against the guy?

Coco: It sounded nice...?

Emerald: I vote we rename ourselves to the, Lesbians Attracted to, Jaune Arc! Where are new mandate is to help each other sleep with, Jaune to some degree. All those in favour say aye.

Ilia: Aye!

Yang: Hell to the aye!

Terra: Aye~!

Coco: Aye!

Coco: Okay, in that case I welcome you to the first meeting of the, LAJA. Lesbians Attracted to, Jaune Arc. First order of business: Who gets to fuck, Jaune first.

Yang: I move, Terra goes last, she's already slept with him, and had his child.

Terra: What?!

Ilia: I agree.

Emerald: Agree.

Coco: The ayes have it; Terra only gets to sleep with, Jaune after the rest of us do.

Terra: ...

Terra: Okay, that's fair...

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A wild Blake appears!

Blake: I want in.

Jaune: FU-

Your Semblance Is What?

Weiss: H-Hold on?

Weiss: You can do what with your semblance?

Jaune: Shapeshifter. I can change my form to however I wish it to be. Well, almost, I can look like other humans, animals, and even, Grimm, but I can’t change the colours of my eyes. They’ll always be blue.

Weiss: Can you become anything else, like an inanimate object?

Jaune: Yep! I can change into a locker, and you could hide in me.

Weiss: Whoa…! C-Can you change into any… fictional things? Like a weird gun?

Jaune: Depends… I can change into something that looks like one, but I have to know how it works. Like turning myself into a weapon, say a pistol is easy, but to actual fire like a gun, I need to learn how a real gun works. Otherwise, I have to imagine it until I figure out how it best works.

Jaune: My sister asked me to change into a slime from her favourite videogame, it took me months to figure out how to do anything in that body…

Weiss: So… You could change yourself right now to look like a bull faunas?

Jaune: Easily!

Jaune: See? What do you think?

Weiss: Whoa…

Jaune: Personally I prefer wolf ears…

Weiss: Awww~!

Jaune: They don’t get in the way bullhorns do, plus I can hear with them!

Weiss: That’s convenient.

Jaune: I can also become a woman too!

Weiss: Wait, what?

Jeanne: See~?

Weiss: Oh gods…?!

Jeanne: I found out I could do this one day after my sisters made me wear a dress again, they got upset they couldn’t dress me up in drag after I did this.

Weiss: So big. So bouncy.

Jaune: But, I prefer this form in all honesty. Less of a hassle.

Weiss: So uhh… J-Jaune… Since you can change your shape…

Jaune: That’s a shapeshifter for ya.

Weiss: Could we… could you change into… into… (Whisper whisper)

Jaune: Yeah, I can. Why?

Weiss: Because I want you to… (Whisper whisper)

Jaune: What?! You want to do what?!

Weiss: Please! It’s always been a dream of mine!

Jaune: Weiss… this is…

Weiss: I’ll let you choose what we do next time!

Jaune: …

Weiss: Please~!

Jaune: …

Jaune: Haa…

Jaune: Fine…

Weiss: Wonderful! Just do this, this once for me, and we’ll never have to do it again.

Jaune: Oh I doubt that.

~~~

Jaune: Okay… Are you… comfortable, Weiss?

Weiss: Yes absolutely! Let’s begin~!

Jaune: Haa… You know… I expected a lot of things from you, Weiss. That you’re into this! I did not expect that…

Weiss: W-What’s wrong with me being an elf girl?

Jaune: Well, there’s nothing wrong with…

Weiss: That’s been tangled up in a slimes tentacles~!

Weiss:

Jaune: There’s plenty of wrong with…?!

Weiss: Where the tentacles strip her naked, then violate her body leaving her a panting moaning mess cover in it’s… Grrk?!

Jaune: Okay… Let’s just get this over with…

Weiss: (Moans~!)

Jaune: Oh gods… I hope no one else hears about this…

Ruby: Weiss?! You’ve been captured my a tentacle monster?! Don’t worry, I’ll save you!

Jaune: Ruby?! This isn’t what it looks like!

Jaune: …

Jaune: It’s exactly what it looks like… But, I can?!

Ruby: Whoops~? I dropped my weapon, and I’m a defenceless maiden at the mercy of these vile… girthy tentacles~! Whatever will I do~?

Jaune: Haa…

Jaune: No one will hear of this.

Ruby: No one, but you, Daddy~!

Jaune: Gods I hope this doesn’t become a thing…

[bdk1902]

Diamond Generation! I can create them out of nothing!

And Belly Combat…

Welp! Time to Snorlax this beetch! C’mere!

You've been randomly selected by the government to fight space aliens. Spin this wheel twice to see the two weird/niche superpowers assigned to you!

Interpret your results any way you like!

Inspiration from @miggylol

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RWBY and Pyrrha with many alt accounts: Money well spent~.

Jaune to chat: Chat, if I get a million subs by the end of the year, I'll wear a Playboy outfit with jorts, suspenders, and no shirt. Deal?

The next day...

Jaune: wearing the outfit Fuck.

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Money

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Jaune: I would say the same to you too.

Topaz

Jaune: Emerald, have you heard of Topaz?

Emerald: To-what?

Jaune: Apparently some people think you and I could be some sort of couple!

Emerald: What? That's stupid!

Jaune: I know, crazy right?

Emerald: absolutely crazy

Jaune: I mean it's possible

Emerald: Hehe... yeah I could see it~

Jaune: I mean you're snarky but in a funny way, and really pretty-

Emerald: You got one helluva ass

Jaune: What did you say?

Emerald: I said you have a nice ass!

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It’s quadruplets.

Jaune: fu-!

Whiteknight, Future AU

After their winter holiday vacation, weiss trying to break juniper Arc's record holds a positive pregnancy test, her 4 children cheered, jaune and their eldest daughter hoping its going to be just one not twins or triplets.

Weiss: *holding a positive pregnancy test, giddy* "YES! More children, and close to breaking your mother's record!"

*Weiss and her four children cheered, while Jaune and their eldest daughter looked on in dread*

Jaune: *deep exhale* "Oh, please be a single baby...not twins or triplets."

[bdk1902]

Blake: …shit. My pants are wet:

Yang: The pee, right?

Blake: …

Yang: right?!

The Horror Film

Ruby: Hey, Jaune! If we were in a horror film, what do you think we would do?

Jaune: Hmm… Well you, Ruby would be the one running away screaming her head off.

Ruby: Fair, I thought that much myself.

Jaune: Weiss would probably be doing the same thing with you.

Weiss: No, I wouldn’t!

Jaune: Yes, you would.

Weiss: Yes I would…

Jaune: Blake would also be running away, but she’s secretly getting off to it all, because being scared is a turn on for her.

Blake: You saw my hand during…?

Jaune: Yep.

Blake: Ahh shit…

Jaune: Yang would be the sexy girl, depending on the scenario in a bikini that dies first.

Yang: What kind of bikini; Normal, stings, thong?

Jaune: Pyrrha would be the naive one that woders off because she heard something, then dies.

Pyrrha: That’s…! No, yeah… that’s what would happen to me…

Jaune: Ren’s the quiet one that suddenly disappears, and you find brutally murder about an hour later.

Ren: Yeah… that… that fits…

Jaune: Nora’s the one who is screaming her head off. But, she’s somehow beating the absolute shit out of whatever that’s trying to kill her in the most comedic way possible.

Nora: Oh-hohoho! I totally would!

Ruby: And, what about you, Jaune? What would you be?

Jaune: Me? Ohh…

Jaune: I’m the one you’re running away from~!

RWBYNPR: …

Jaune: Boo.

RWBYNPR: AHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Jaune: …

Jaune: Hmm… That worked out pretty well…

Jaune:

Ðøn’T ŶOu ȚħiÑk sO ðEaR ReäDEř~¿!

[bdk1902]

Don't run, Jaune! They love a good chase!

Hi, been reading your stories for some time now, could you do another episode of "The Beach" with Nora or Emerald. Thanks.

The Beach: E

Jaune: Haaa… What is this place: Kink Beach?!

Jaune: Everywhere I go, people tell me their kinks, and how they want me to reenact it with them. What the hell man?

Jaune: …

Jaune: Although… Why am I running…? There’s nothing wrong if I…?!

: Hey, Jaune!

Jaune: Whaa-AHHH?!

: …?!

Jaune: Wha… who… oh… Hey, Emerald. Ohhh… Oh damn…

Jaune: L-Looking good, Emerald.

Emerald: Oh, thanks, Jaune! Yeah, whits the best colour on me, really makes my skin ‘pop out.’

Jaune: It does… But, don’t you think it’s a little too… revealing…?

Emerald: No, I’m completely covered up.

Jaune: Mostly…

Emerald: So what is this I head about, Kink Beach?

Jaune: Oh, I’m just loosing my mind. Every girl I’ve run into here has been telling me all about their sexual fantasies. So, I said: ‘What is this place, Kink Beach?’ Hahaha!

Emerald: It is.

Jaune: Haha…?!

Jaune: Beg pardon?

Emerald: The beach we’re at, it’s called, ‘Kink Beach.’

Jaune: …

Jaune: Why…?

Emerald: Well, it’s because every girl there tells the guy they like their sexual fantasies. No one knows why, they just do. So, the beach was named, ‘Kink Beach.’

Jaune: …

Jaune: Okay… I’ve been trapped in lala loopy land for decades that will literally drive you insane with all the random nonsense that happens every five minutes! But, despite of all the messed up, and crazy shit I experienced there, this, this is what I call bullshit on!

Emerald: That’s fair. But, how else would I explain to you that I like white dudes, and I want them to paint me white.

Jaune: …

Emerald: Specifically it’s you who I like, and want to paint my skin white~!

Jaune: Okay… ?

Emerald: So you’ll do it?!

Jaune: W-Wait! Hold on?!

Emerald: You’ll give me a pearl necklace!

Jaune: That’s now what I…?!

Emerald: Paint my backside?!

Jaune: Okay, stop!

Emerald: You’ll do me until I’m covered, and leaking your white spunk from every hole~?!

Jaune: …

Emerald: You’ll do all of that, and more, won’t you?!

Jaune: …

Emerald: Won’t you, please~?

Jaune: …

Emerald: Please, Daddy~?

Jaune: …

Jaune: Oh look a distraction!

Emerald: A distraction? Where?

Emerald: I don’t see…?!

Emerald: Hey, come back here!

Jaune: Never…!

Emerald: Ohhh… Shit!

[bdk1902]

An Arc always kept his words.

He will forget that, right?

Little Jaune: I... I'm going to marry big sister glynda when I grow up!

Glynda: *smile* Ara Ara, I'm an older woman, you know?

Little Jaune: That's fine with me!

Glynda: *Pats his head while smiling* (He'll forget about it in a couple of years.) Well then, if your feelings for me don't change when you grow up, come find me.

15 years later

*Ding Dong*

Glynda: *Opens the door of her house* Hello

Jaune V8: *Smiling and holding a bouquet of roses* I came to find you.

Glynda: *Blushing* ...Eh?

[bdk1902]

BaoNov.

[bdk1902]

Oh hell no!

Hello dear!

Sorry for bothering you, but it's important to remind you to turn off your asks for a few days! Bad things are going to happen on Tumblr soon...

Don t know anything about this but BETTER BE SAFE EVERYBODY!!!!!!

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Dear friends of Tumblr,

Today at my school we had an assembly about internet predators and when I had said that most of my true friends are over the internet and they gave me a lecture about how “I don’t know who I’m talking to” blah blah. So please, if you aren’t a predator in any way, please reblog so i can prove a point.

[bdk1902]

Plot twist: It did work.

Jaune: Do you like chicken?

Yang: No

Jaune: What about curry?

Yang: Neither

Jaune: Then you're not going to like what I've done.

Yang: Chicken curry?

Jaune: No, I slept with your sister.

[bdk1902]

Weiss: What did you do this time, Yang?

Yang: I kinda told her that Santa isn’t real and her team doesn’t like me now.

Weiss: …Santa isn’t real? *her expression shocked*

Yang: oh not again.

Santa DOES exist.

Yang: Nora, at what age did you find out that Santa doesn't exist?

Nora: *Sock* Santa doesn't exist?

Yang: Um-Well...

Moments later.

Pyrrha: *Trying to comfort Nora* Now Nora, of course Santa exists.

Nora: *crying* You are lying!

Jaune: Of course Santa exist, Yang was just joking.

Yang: *To ren* Im really sorry. I didn't mean to, I swear.

Ren: Don't talk to Nora or my team ever again.

[bdk1902]

Pyrrha: Shout out to the man that made me realize I was bi....

Ruby and Weiss each being held under the crook of her arms...

Pyrrha: AND into polyamory! 💕💕

Ruby: Eh?

Weiss: Huh?

Vanishes into JNPR's dorm room with them...

Pyrrha: 💕💕 Jaune honey! I found our WAIFUs!!! 💕💕