bazkrekkerbrokemyshin

[bazkrekkerbrokemyshin]

soc/ck but it’s just jesper insulting jan van eck

“you’re the fool. he’s smarter than most of us put together, and he deserves a better father than you.”

“you know what jan van eck’s problem is?” “receding hairline?”

“i have a hard time imagining your father laughing, even smiling. unless he’s rubbing his hands together and cackling over a pile of gold.”

“i’d like to string your father up in a barren field and let the vultures have at him.”

“your father is a lunatic dressed up in a quality suit.”

“i think your first investment should be a muzzle.”

[bazkrekkerbrokemyshin]

kaz but his cane is pink

(just like me fr)

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au where Kaz’s father (and Jordie) are alive but Kaz still becomes a gang leader for some reason (idk maybe there was a misunderstanding in which Kaz thought they were dead for while) and his father isn’t even upset about the crime and murder shit, he just wishes Kaz would be a criminal closer to home

Kaz’s father: I just don’t understand why it has to be Ketterdam, I mean surely, there are gangs in Beledt?

Kaz, confused and slightly embarrassed: I thought you’d be more angry about…y’know everything I’ve done

Kaz’s father: Oh, please, your mother was mercenary before we were married and for little bit afterwards as well. It would unbearably hypocritical of me to judge for being a gang leader when your Mother killed for a living

Kaz:…that makes sense for mama, actually

Kaz’s father: on the topic of your mother, are really letting people call you a bastard? You were conceived well into wedlock, your brother’s a little iffy but there was no question with you

Kaz, now more than slightly embarrassed: It’s metaphorical, Da.

(I don’t know I just really love the idea of Kaz’s family loving and accepting him no matter what and Kaz’s mother being a badass that he’s exactly like.)

(on a side note, does anyone have any name ideas for Kaz’s father?)

also the crows are watching this and going “This explains so much.”

[bazkrekkerbrokemyshin]

Kaz: “We’re going to be stealthy about this, okay?”

Jesper: *accidentally knocks over everything in sight

Kaz: “Stealthy, Jesper.”

Jesper: “Sorry, I can’t hear you over all the stealth.”

[bazkrekkerbrokemyshin]

Inej Ghafa

I’m so proud of this you guys omg

Also I spent so long on the background I might post it just alone it’s not even funny 😭

btw the translation of the Ravkan are “Peanuts - 1.50/ per bag” “To The Saints” and “Circus”

[bazkrekkerbrokemyshin]

[bazkrekkerbrokemyshin]

okay I’ve been posting a lot of sad Jordie lives stuff so im gonna share one of the silliest headcanons I have

Jesper and Jordie have never ending beef, when I say never-ending beef, I mean never-ending. No one quite knows when it started and no one knows why but they just fucking hate each other (Inej theorizes it’s one of those ‘just got a glimpse into my own personality from someone else and I hated it’ situations but he [Jordie] likes Nina so she’s not really all that confident) They can be moderately civil when Kaz is around but once they’re alone? Oh, they are at each other’s throats (verbally bc if they hurt each other Kaz will be upset) they absolutely cannot stand each other and it’s the funniest thing to witness

(to be fair, I think Jordie hated all of Kaz’s friends at first bc overprotective big brother™️ but Jesper’s the only crow who’s had the pleasure of being able to maintain said hatred)

[bazkrekkerbrokemyshin]

All soc fans relate to this

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I love putting them in dumb little outfits

[bazkrekkerbrokemyshin]

don't care + didn't ask + my ghost won't associate with your ghost

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The Crows

but they're a paintball team

that's it

that's the post

[bazkrekkerbrokemyshin]

Wylan: This bloodline ends with me.

Jesper: That’s the fanciest way i’ve ever heard anyone say “I’m gay”

[bazkrekkerbrokemyshin]

obsessed with pointy cartoon kaz

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readers when "matthias was dreaming again" 😭😭😭

[bazkrekkerbrokemyshin]

kaz brekker says "sounds like a you problem."

jesper fahey says "sounds like a skill issue."

[bazkrekkerbrokemyshin]

Jesper: Do you think Kaz has a soft side?

Wylan: Jesper, this morning he told me to “die quieter” because my cough was distracting him.

[bazkrekkerbrokemyshin]

“This was an ongoing debate between the three of them—Nina, Jesper, and Inej—about whether Kaz was actually a vampire or just an abnormally pale, abnormally mysterious human who knew how to acquire blood and had somehow found out about magic.”

This is for the fic “We’re Gonna Need a Bigger Pentagram” by @emmy-everafter about crows coven shenanigans for the @grishaversebigbang! Go read the fic it’s so good! And check out alllll the beautiful art!

etherialki: @emmy-everafter [x]

materialki: @polekands [x] @crypitick [x] @discountscoobyart [x] and my first piece [x]