bartangulontheturquoise

[bartangulontheturquoise]

you guys have got to get better at spellcasting any time someone's attempted to curse me with 10k note post it gets like 50 at most. back to the spell books buddy that one might be too advanced for you try learning some cantrips first

[bartangulontheturquoise]

scantily is basically the most classic way to be clad

[bartangulontheturquoise]

that said i still mostly do horsefoolery like this LMFAO

[bartangulontheturquoise]

it cold

[bartangulontheturquoise]

people hate me because of my runes. people got so mad because I have a deep understanding of the arcane. people hate me because I'm good at what I do

[bartangulontheturquoise]

I think it's one of those normal non-corrupted amulets and I'm glowing green for unrelated reasons

[bartangulontheturquoise]

well now that’s just mean. we also use it for other stuff like animating corn and braums duplication. not a whole lot but still

It’s a common misconception that there are no wizards in the midwest USA. The truth is there are plenty, they just use their powers exclusively for making new and fucked up kinds of salad

[bartangulontheturquoise]

Guys I miss my Cursed Amulet

[bartangulontheturquoise]

[bartangulontheturquoise]

You must retrieve my malicious amulet

[bartangulontheturquoise]

WIZARD WRAPPED

You casted 1,039,627 spells this year

You pondered your orb for 985 hours

You targeted 109 spells at someone other than yourself - that’s in the top 6% of wizards!

You gained 5 familiars

Your favorite focus for spellcasting this year was a staff

Your cup size is H

Your most cast spell was Spontaneous Snack Generation and you used it 576 times this year.

Your most summoned object was Ketamine Ape at 69 summons

You trapped someone within an amulet for 10,000 years

You were unwittingly haunted by the evil skull twice

[bartangulontheturquoise]

hellllll yeah almost at 100 soups this year

[bartangulontheturquoise]

powerful spells coming from ludacris…. further study needed

[bartangulontheturquoise]

You have a rotten brain, thankfully we can just swap that out, no problem

[bartangulontheturquoise]

Do you think it's embarrassing for dragons to be killed by humans or is it like a bee allergy situation

[bartangulontheturquoise]

Has the wizardposting scene arrived on Bluesky or is tumblr still the place to go for your essential wizard council updates?

You want to export me to the SKY?! The BLUESKY?! You want to launch this old wizard into the atmosphere like some kind of tardigrade?!?!