barista-problems-101

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My manager and assistant manager were convinced our kiosk was possessed by a ghost cat. Cause we’d just be chilling on one end and then on the other end the lid for the blender pitcher or the blender pitcher itself would just fall over into the sink.

haunted dolls are cool not scary like bro there's a friend in there

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i love when boomers complain about shit like this because as a fast food worker i would literally rather walk out into the lobby and shoot myself in the head than suggest more than one menu item to a customer

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Watching this gave me anxiety/an aneurism

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I am actually leaving my job later this week. About 6 weeks ago my manager, assistant manager and trainer all quit and slowly everyone else did so it’s just not the same. It was a lot of stress. I’m moving to the cashiering department as my kiosk was in a grocery store. I’ll still post stories I remember or related memes occasionally. Or maybe even stories I hear from the coffee chain department.

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Hi! How do you make the famous tiktok drink? The ice coffee with 3 pumps white mocha and sweet cream? Do you use shots of espresso or do you use brewed coffee? And if using shots, how many and do you add water? Thanks in advance.

For one, I can’t stand making this.

I hate tic toc.

Its typically an iced white mocha so it’s espresso shots, white mocha, cold milk and foamed up sweet cream. The shots depend on what size the drink is.

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valentine’s day asks!

do you have a crush on anyone?

what’s your favorite candy?

favorite love song?

what was your first kiss like?

what was your last kiss like?

sexual/romantic orientation?

do you prefer poems or love letters?

favorite fanfic trope?

have you ever been in love?

favorite milkshake flavor?

dinner dates or brunch dates?

favorite flowers?

favorite perfume/cologne?

favorite candle scent?

what’s your ideal first date?

favorite love story?

what’s the most attractive thing a person could wear?

chocolate, vanilla, or red velvet?

snow, rain, or sun?

sweetest romantic memory?

favorite dating sim (and favorite character)?

fictional crushes?

what’s your dream wedding like?

what makes you blush?

do you believe in love at first sight?

do you believe in soulmates?

denim jackets, leather jackets, or bomber jackets?

what’s your sign?

are you single?

do you prefer to charm, or be charmed?

guitar or piano?

favorite romcom (or any romantic movie)?

do you fall in love easily?

valentine’s decorations: yay or nay?

would you prefer to propose or be proposed to? what’s your dream proposal?

cloud gazing or star gazing?

do you like to dance?

what’s your OTP?

kittens or puppies?

coffee, hot chocolate, or tea?

favorite soda?

do you prefer gazing wistfully out the window or lying dramatically over the sofa?

favorite ABBA song?

fuck/marry/kill? (anons name 3 people of your choice)

favorite pajamas?

favorite liquor?

do you think about love a lot?

a walk in the park or a walk on the beach?

hand kisses or nose kisses?

what’s your dreamhouse?

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mocha caramel latteccino etcetcetc girl: clear concise order with explicit instructions. literally the only confusion is with the word latteccino but i can assume the intent is to request equal amounts of steam milk and foam milk because that ratio is the only difference between latte and cappuccino. her order is good because its specific and easy to communicate but god forbid someone have a clear idea of what she wants and the vocabulary to communicate it confidently ooooh~ scary coffee order oooooo~

"ill have a tea": what fucking tea dumbass you want black tea white tea green tea you want fruit flower herb spice you want southern sweet tea you want lipton unsweet you want fucking sleepytime bear what fucking SIZE asshole you want small medium large huge WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT BE FUCKING CLEAR WHAT KIND OF FUCKING TEA ARE YOU AFTER YOU SELF IMPORTANT REPROBATE. YOU ARROGANT FUCK. YOU COMPLETE FUCKING TOOL. YOU CANT JUST SAY FUCKING TEA JESUS CHRIST the ARROGANCE the SELFRIGHTEOUSNESS the fucking UNMITIGATED GALL to just waltz into a goddamned HOT DRINK EMPORIUM and say "juss a TEA pweez uwu none of that complicated mumbo jumbo teehee" RELEASE THE HOUNDS

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Crazy drinks I’ve had customers order:

A Trenta Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew...with 4 shots of espresso!! (For context, a Trenta is 30oz, Cold Brew is already our most caffeinated coffee. And the 4 shots, well a Venti Iced Latte typically comes with 3). Theres already about 320+mg of caffeine in that cold brew, plus 4 shots is about 300mg more so she is having 600mg + caffeine in one drink.

Also in the heavily caffeinated drink category we have a regular who gets a Grande Iced Carmel Macchiato with anywhere between 5 and 7 shots. It normally comes with 2. Sometimes she gets multiple a day.

There’s the guy who gets a Trenta Black Tea with 7 pumps of Peppermint and a shot of espresso.

Anyone who gets a drink at 180 degrees and drinks it right away, like, how do you not burn your mouth off and why are you getting that in the middle of Summer?

Also people who order layered Frappachinos with no Whip Cream, you’re missing pretty much the whole point. The only difference between the Mocha Cookie Crumble and the Java Chip, is the extra Whip Cream and the crushed Oreos, so If you wanna order a Mocha Cookie Crumble with no whip, just save the Like 50 cents and order a Java Chip.

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Actual things that customers have said to me during COVID.

As I’ve mentioned I work in a kiosk in a grocery store, so we never closed cause grocery stores are essential. The most we did was change our hours some.

Back when it was early on. Like essential business only still big. So like, March

I think it was a Saturday morning. I just opened and my co-worker wasn’t in yet but that’s normal for Saturday.

2 Customers comes up. One orders his two drinks then turns to his friend. “I didn’t think Starbucks would be essential.” He says as he buys coffee.

Like I said, I work in a grocery store, they aren’t going to tell the 10 baristas they can’t work but let everyone else in the store work. And they aren’t just going to move us for those couple weeks to month cause like, they’d have to train us how to do that position, and they might run into the problem where half they baristas decide they want to stay cashier and then when the Starbucks can we open be understaffed. We actually did have a barista move to cashiering cause after helping out that’s what happened to her. She just decided she liked cashiering better. (She wasn’t that good anyway so i actually liked it).

But any way. This was later that month or maybe early April, before the store mandated employees to be masked.

A group of 4 teenage girls come up and order their stupid Frappachinos or tic toc drinks. When I tell them the total one girl calls over her mom to pay. Mom is wearing a mask and as she pays tells me, “shouldn’t you be wearing a mask?”

Keep in mind her daughter isn’t wearing a mask, and neither is any of her friends. When COVID was still huge I never went anywhere besides work. If we needed groceries or anything else from a store, my mom went alone. I haven’t seen my friends since very early March when we went and saw a movie the weekend before the lockdown. So this lady was mad at me for not wearing a mask, but wasn’t making her daughter wear one or socially distant herself.

Anyways, customers have been crazy. For about 6 weeks we were busy all the time cause we were the only Starbucks open in the two towns. We were pulling almost $2000 a day on the weekdays and more on the weekends. Since then we’ve settled down, which has its downsides too. We don’t get as many tips, and we no longer get the extra $0.50 bonus for hazard pay, which is honestly dumb. I think that as long as we have to wear masks we should be getting it.

I know I haven’t posted in a while, I’ll try to post more often.

Just remember to be kind to retail workers and please wear a mask even if it’s not required wear you are. “I can’t breathe in it.” I hear you say. Well keep in mind that I have to wear mine for 8 hours straight. You can be in and out of the store from 5-25 minutes or whatever.

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Best experience at Starbucks is when you say the names of two items and the customer says “what’s the difference?” because either 1) you get a chance to educate someone about coffee, which is fun as long as they’re interested or 2) you have a funny story to tell later about the idiot in the drive-thru.

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USE YOUR EARS IF YOU ARE ABLE TO HEAR!!!!

I can’t tell you the number of times a customer has asked me if this drink is there’s.  Listen.  If i am on bar and my coworker is on register.  If we are busy, I’m just making the drinks, I’m not paying attention to who’s ordering what.  So if I set down a drink i call it out, “Vent hot White mocha.” 

Customer: “Is this mine?”

me: “Its a venti hot white mocha,”  I don’t have time to figure it out if its yours or not cause i have 5 other drinks in the queue to be made.  

Or the number of times I’ve had to remake a drink cause someone grabbed the completely wrong drink.  Like i get it if they are both the same size hot drinks.  But ive had people grab a completely different size and temperature drink, 

And i can’t tell you the number of times that if I’m making a drink on the cold bar and hot bar on the same time. or in some way i set a drink out that you didn’t order, but you assume its yours cause you were standing there when i put it out.  Just the other day i set out a Venti hot White Mocha while my co-worker was making a tall Mocha Frappachino.  i call out the VENTI HOT WHITE MOCHA and the guy took it cause he assumed it was his when he ordered a freaken TALL MOCHA FRAPPACHINO!!!  he took a LARGE HOT DRINK WHEN HE ORDERED A SMALL FROZEN DRINK!!!

Please just listen to the barista when they say what the drink is. Just because you are standing at the end of the bar doesn’t mean the first drink that is set out when you stand there is yours, there are other people ordering.  and the drink that’s been sitting there for 20 seconds isn’t abandoned, we are in a grocery store, they probably are grabbing carrots real quick or are checking out.  

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Wait to Finish Brewing

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Here’s some of my personal favorite drinks.

I get all my lattes with non fat milk and typically iced, but that’s just a preference. Here’s the actual drinks:

1. White Mocha with Cinnamon Dolce

2. White Mocha with Raspberry and typically an extra shot (since it’s so much sweeter)

3. Salted Caramel White Mocha

(If you cant tell I like my white mocha)

4. Carmel Macchiato, sub Vanilla with Toffee Nut with 2 extra pumps and extra Carmel Drizzle. (It’s like a Salted Carmel Latte)

5. Very Berry Hibiscus Refresher with Lemonade.

6. Salted Cream Cold Foam Cold Brew with 2 pumps Toffee Nut, 2 pumps Carmel (in a grande)

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Today someone got a grande medicine ball (peach tranquility and jade citrus mint tea, steamed lemonade, honey and a Sometimes a little bit peppermint syrup). Not so bad, until she asked for 20 pumps of peppermint. 20! Freakin twenty!! I was so disgusted. How do you even make tea when the syrup it self goes halfway up the cup to, ya know, where the water would go!!!

You’re basically drinking just syrup. And peppermint is one of the strong syrups, like you can instantly tell if a drink has even just one pump of peppermint by smelling it.