baizhoobies

[baizhoobies]

It’s my birthday 🎉

Here’s to another year of nonsense and fanfics

Also happy new year!!

[baizhoobies]

𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ⋅ to carry a dragon’s love ᡣ𐭩 ་༘࿐

— ft. neuvillette, zhongli

synopsis — you’re their precious little mate, and how much more perfect you’ll be when you’re carrying their seed; 1.5k words.

— minors do not interact! unprotected sex. breeding. mating. marking. they have draconic anatomy. double penetration. fem!reader.

— neuvillette 𝜗𝜚

sharp teeth sink into your shoulder and you mewl into the plush pillow. the ache of them in your flesh paired with the way his cocks lodge deep inside of you has you lost somewhere between pleasure and pain. you’re gripping the sheets until you’re knuckles turn white. you’re drooling and your hair is wild around your head; you’re an absolute wreck under him now.

neuvillette’s hips crash against your ass in a loud smack, your slickness adding a lewd wet sound to the action that makes your cheeks burn hot. you hear him grunt from behind you. “you will be the end of me, my love.”

he’s not fairing much better than you, in truth. his breathing is labored and his thrusts are erratic. he’s not the normal neuvillette you’re so used to seeing; no, he’s much more carnal now, so much more like the dragon that he is. he’s fueled by his most primal of instincts, the tight wrap of you around him urging him to take you, utterly and completely.

“neuvillette,” you cry his name in that saccharine melody he adores so much, the one that melts his heart and makes his cocks twitch against the confines of your walls.

“when you say my name like that, my love, i simply cannot help myself.” and the next thrust into you is brutal and bruising and so deep your breath is knocked from your lungs. he’s fucking you with a purpose, fucking into you so right that you’re sobbing into the pillow.

you know what he’s wanting, what he’s after, and you’re almost unraveling at the mere thought of it.

he’s all too aware of the squeeze of your walls and he groans, muffling the sound with another bite to your shoulder. it’s already marked, and he just can’t help but revel in the fact that’ll be days before it leaves your pretty skin. “you are close, yes?”

you attempt a nod and a small, broken moan that resembles the word yes.

“how perfect you are for me, my love.” neuvillette is flush against you, pressing you deeper into the mattress while his hips maintain a ruthless rhythm, urging you closer and closer to your climax. “do you still want it? please, tell me you do. tell me you still want me to mate you, breed you.”

his voice is deep and gravelly yet tender, and his words are so lewd that you whine underneath him. you know his dragon nature has taken over, you know it’d be practically impossible for him to not breed you now, to sink his seed so deep into your womb with a promise to gift you a child, an offspring. but above all he always wants your approval, and you’re so thankful for that.

“yes,” you hiccup, back arching and ass attempting to meet his hips with little thrusts of your own. a way to show him how eager and willing you are. “i want it. please neuvillette!”

the sovereign above you grins with elation, his hands gripping your waist as he increases his thrusts to a bruising pace; but even with the wild way he takes you, you still feel love in every kiss of his cocks against the deepest parts of you, every squeeze of his palms against your skin.

“you will be my lovely mate, so beautiful pregnant with our young.” he’s close, achingly so. he’s driving into you deep and hitting the sweetest of spots until you’re shuddering under the weight of your orgasm.

you cum with a cry of his name and tight squeezes around his cock. it’s maddening, the pleasure he gives you, and it’s heightened by the promise of his seed, of what it means to be taken so wholly by your mate.

neuvillette is close behind you, reaching his own completion with a guttural groan that echoes against the bedroom walls. he empties himself within you, stilling his hips to plug your holes so that not a single drop goes to waste. you’ve never felt so full in your life.

in your post orgasm state, you barely register the way he kisses all the marks he left behind, soothing the aftermath of his desire. “you did well, my love.”

you breathe as his hands caress your frame. “i love you.”

and oh, how he loves you, his most beautiful mate. his one and only.

— zhongli 𝜗𝜚

“relax, dearest. you are doing so well for me.”

the soft baritone of your lover’s voice fills the space between you and you feel your muscles ease at the sound immediately. zhongli coos while his large palms soothe at the plush flesh of your thighs, careful of his long claws against your precious skin. he pushes your legs open even wider to allow his hips to drive in deeper and you keen when he seems to reach beyond what you can even fathom, broken mewls spilling out of your kiss-swollen lips.

“ah, that’s it. so perfect,” the godly being groans above you at the tight squeeze of your walls around him; he’s got you filled to the brim with both of his large cocks, and they sit heavy and hot in the wet depths of you.

you whimper when he shifts your hips upwards for better leverage. he settles your thighs at his waist while his hands grip even tighter into your hips. he slides even deeper into your weepy holes and all you can do is lay against the sheets and take what he gives. “zhongli, my love, please. i’m so full.”

zhongli’s hips retract before springing forward to offer you swift thrust. the clap of skin resounds in the air of your bedroom and it’s so beautifully lewd it makes your walls flutter. he’s looking at where your bodies are joined with the upmost adoration and love, amber eyes bright and so incredibly soft with fondness. “feels wonderful, doesn’t it?” he palms at the evident bulge in your tummy; he doesn’t miss the way you shudder under his hot touch. “you feel divine. so immensely perfect–” a thrust, “–around me.”

he presses forward, your thighs giving way as his larger frame folds yours in half. he mouths down your cheek to your neck, sharp teeth pricking playfully at your skin until you’re whining out. he’s so much deeper like this, in this mating press he’s now got you in. he thrusts and you swear the force of it shakes you to your core.

“going to breed you,” zhongli says lowly, voice gravelly and rough as he begins to lose himself to the way you wrap around his cocks. “my perfect little mate. you’ll take every last drop of my seed. won’t you, my dearest?”

your mouth opens to reply but oh how your lover likes to tease, driving his cocks deeper at the same time as you begin to speak; instead of words, the most helpless cry tumbles out of your throat.

teeth sink into the flesh of your neck hard, leaving behind a mark that’ll remain for the days to come. “you’ll be so beautiful pregnant with our child, all round and full. don’t you think so?” zhongli picks up his pace suddenly and your body rattles underneath him, crystalline beads falling down your cheeks as you grow overwhelmed. “tell me, you’ll let me make you wholly mine, yes? be the best mate and mother of our offspring.”

your mind is so full of cotton and pleasure and his words do nothing to help you, wearing you down until all that remains is the most vulnerable parts of you. you, your body are his. you give yourself to him completely; you wish to say it, to tell him, but in this state all you can manage is a broken, “yes!”

he’s pressing a languid kiss against your lips, swallowing your cries of bliss before his tongue slips its way through your lips, laving at your wet mouth with its forked tip. it’s messy just like what lies between your thighs where he enters you, over and over and as he fucks you closer to your completion. you’re so pliant and malleable for him as he molds you to his desire.

there’s a clawed thumb against your clit and your body jerks at the spike in pleasure. you’re so sensitive and overwhelmed with pleasure and his cocks and just him entirely. “zhongli, gonna cum!” and it’s all the warning you can offer him before you’re breaking under the weight of euphoria.

the god above you groans when you go rigid beneath him, holes so tight and wet around him. “good girl,” his hips stutter as he nears dangerously close to his own end. “my precious, perfect girl.” he fucks you through the last remaining moments of your orgasm, hips urgent as he seeks his own pleasure. you wail at the overstimulation, one of your small hands grasping at the golden marks on his bicep.

and just as he promised, he fills you with his thick seed, flooding the depths of you until it begins to seep around the base of his cocks. his body shudders under the immense pleasure, hips rocking once, twice before he stills completely.

“mine,” a kiss to your temple. “all mine.”

nat’s notes — was very much in my feels for these two dragon men thus this was created! also wanted to commemorate a successful banner for these two as it now nears it’s end. so happy to be a neuvi and zhongli haver. hope everyone had a great time, and got the character(s) you wished for! <3

[baizhoobies]

𝐎𝐧𝐢 𝐃𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐀𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐲…?

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟕

Synopsis: f!Reader somehow finds herself trapped in the spirit realm. Whoops. She entrusts the help of a Yokai Detective Agency to get her back to the mortal realm where she belongs. Wait? A detective agency? In the spirit realm? And the only way of escape is to work with a disgruntled and hot headed Oni who is somehow spiritually bound to her? Sheesh.

A multichapter, Kamisama Kiss inspired story with your favourite Bungo man. Or at least, my favourite ~

Warnings: 18+, eventual smut, violence, swearing, blood mention, monsterfucking, knotting, ruts, omegaverse vibes, breeding

A/N: ooh boy. The big one. Merry Christmas and happy holidays!

Chapter Warnings: 18+!!!!!! Smut, swearing, monsterfucking, knotting, ruts, omegaverse vibes, breeding kink, scent kink? Cunnilingus, talks of pregnancy, wrap it up!

Masterlist

The days trickled by with an agonizing slowness. You could feel the weight of the ticking clock - 15 more days until you could return to the mortal realm. You reminded yourself often that this was what you wanted, what you needed. As much as you had enjoyed your time in the spirit realm, you felt a sense of duty, an obligation to return back to the mortal realm; your family and friends were there, your old life, everything.

Despite going over things logically, the pang of belonging tugged at you. Only 15 days in the spirit realm and you felt right at home. From the culture, the sights, the food the…company, everything seemed better to you. Perhaps it was the fact you didn’t have to do much work, getting three meals a day, heck, you started to no longer miss the sun. All that, coupled with Kunikida, the Oni who has helped you throughout your time here, the one who (despite having a piss poor attitude) was always by your side; you almost got used to it.

But the thought felt heavier than it should, especially when Kunikida was being so... distant.

He wasn’t being cold in the traditional sense. Kunikida still made your meals, ensured that you were safe, and stuck to his annoyingly rigid routines. But there was a chill in his interactions, a deliberate avoidance that gnawed at you. Especially when he started wearing a face mask, claiming he was ‘feeling under the weather’.

It was like this for a fair few days, although Kunikida had to stay by your side, he tried to keep as much distance between you as possible. Leaving breakfast at the foot of the futon, making sure he walks several steps in front or behind you, he even managed to get you doing a few jobs at the office as to stay away from you as much as possible. Whenever you tried to talk to him, he would face away, covering his hand over his mask and said some shit like ‘I don’t want you to catch this’ - not that you actually thought it was possible, considering he was an Oni, and you, a human.

Today, though, Kunikida seemed worse. His movements were stiff, his breathing shallow, and sweat beaded on his forehead. Even with the mask, his complexion looked pale, a sharp contrast to his usual robust energy.

“Kunikida, you look awful” you said bluntly as you watched him attempt to prepare your breakfast.

“I’m fine” he snapped, though his voice lacked its usual bite. “This is nothing.”

“Right,” you huffed, crossing your arms. “Because sweating buckets and wobbling on your feet is just a regular Wednesday for you.”

He ignored you, though you caught the way his hands trembled as he poured tea.

“Kunikida” you said again, softer this time. “You’re not okay. You should stay home today and rest.”

“I can’t,” he replied tightly. “There’s work to be done. We can’t afford to waste time.”

At this point, your frustration boiled over. “You’re not even human! You don’t get sick like humans do, I think, so what’s actually going on with you? And don’t say it’s nothing.”

His grip tightened on the teapot, the muscles in his jaw clenching visibly. “Drop it, Y/N.”

“No,” you spoke firmly, standing tall in attempts to look authoritative towards the pesky Oni. “If you won’t listen to reason, then I’ll just have to make you.” You took a step closer, locking eyes with him. “I order you to stay home and take a sick day. Rest.”

Kunikida froze, the weight of the spirit bond making your command impossible to ignore. He glared at you, his hazel eyes burning with frustration.

“You’re abusing that bond” he spoke through gritted teeth.

“I’m keeping you from collapsing in the middle of the street,” you shoot back. “Big difference.”

He sighed heavily, setting the teapot down with more force than necessary. “Fine. One day. But don’t expect me to enjoy this.”

-

Later that morning, true to your word, you made sure Kunikida stayed in his room, much to his irritation. You had him lying down, which he insisted he lay on his yoga mat, his default - you couldn’t help but notice how uncomfortable he looked. His tall frame didn’t fit well on the narrow mat, and he shifted restlessly.

“You know, you could use the bed” you offered as you placed a damp cloth on his forehead.

“I’m fine here” he spat, his voice muffled slightly by the mask.

“Right. Because the image of you passed out on the floor is so reassuring” you replied sarcastically.

Kunikida didn’t respond, but you caught the flicker of a frown beneath the mask. All you could do was sigh and sit back on your heels as you looked down at the pitiful Oni. “You’re impossible, you know that?”

“Better than being reckless” he muttered.

“Reckless?” You repeated, raising an eyebrow. “How is asking you to take care of yourself reckless?”

“It’s not about me,” he said, his voice strained. “I have responsibilities, to the agency, to you. I can’t afford to be weak.”

You frowned at this, your frustration softening into something more sympathetic. “Kunikida, even superheroes take sick days. You’re not a machine.”

He closed his eyes, his breathing uneven. For a moment, you thought he might argue again, but instead, he simply lay still.

As the morning wore on, you busied yourself with small tasks such as tidying up the already meticulous room, bringing him water, and checking his temperature. All the while you would notice his occasional glances in your direction, though he quickly looked away whenever you caught him.

-

By the time lunch rolled around, Kunikida seemed marginally better, though his fever hadn’t completely broken. You brought him a bowl of rice porridge, your attempts at cooking in the spirit realm improving slightly under his earlier tutelage.

“Eat” you instructed, handing him the bowl.

He sat up slowly, taking the bowl with a reluctant nod. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome” you said, sitting down across from him. You notice that his hands were still shaky and he would avert his gaze; at least he was eating though.

You ate in silence for a while, the tension between you less sharp than usual. You watched him carefully, noting the faint lines of fatigue around his eyes.

“Can I ask you something?” You ventured.

He looked up, wary. “What?”

“Why are you so hard on yourself?”

He stiffened, his grip on the bowl tightening. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“Yes, you do,” you said gently. “You push yourself so much, and for what? You can’t save everyone, Kunikida. No one can.”

His expression darkened, and for a moment, you thought he might shut you out again. But then he sighed, setting the bowl aside.

“It’s not about saving everyone,” he said quietly. “It’s about living up to the ideals I’ve set for myself. If I can’t even do that, then what’s the point?”

You frown again, feeling your heart aching at the weight he carried. “You’re allowed to falter, you know. It doesn’t make you any less worthy.”

He didn’t respond, his gaze distant.

“Just... think about it,” you said softly, reaching out a hand to touch his. He welcomed it, only momentarily until his instincts swiftly pulled away. You put it down to the sickness, he puts it down to restraint. Which all of this is. Having you here in his home whilst he enters a rut is dangerous, and micro-dosing you seems to be helping, but being an Oni deep in a rut, it won’t last.

Whilst you helped him, he was figuring out ways on how to remove you from his home whilst he gets through this rut. Maybe next door? Maybe just hold out until you have to go to the mortal realm where you belong? But 15 days is such a long time away.

‘The mortal realm’ he recalls in his mind, in 15 days you’ll be gone. Thats a good thing. Can’t attach himself to you, regardless of being able to pass to and from the spirit and mortal realm. It would be selfish to keep you, especially when the both of you are so deep in denial, it’s almost comical.

No matter how strong his urges are, he has to be distant, he has to uphold his ideals he has to.

-

Lunch had passed in a rare atmosphere of peace. Kunikida lay slumped back against the wall, his golden eyes half-lidded from exhaustion. You sat cross-legged on the floor, tidying up the tray you’d brought in earlier.

Your gaze drifted to him, watching how his broad shoulders heaved with labored breaths. The yoga mat beneath him was woefully inadequate - thin and rumpled, hardly suitable for someone of his size.

“You know” you started casually, “you’re going to wake up with a bad back if you keep lying on that thing.”

“I’m fine” he muttered, his voice still hoarse.

You rolled your eyes. “You keep saying that, but it’s painfully obvious that you’re not.”

“It’s not your concern” he replied gruffly, turning his head away, a bead of sweat rolls down his forehead. The rut is getting worse by the second.

“Oh, but it is my concern” you said with a mischievous glint in your eye. “Thanks to this lovely spirit bond, remember?”

His jaw tightened, but he didn’t respond.

You stood, dusting off your hands before pointing to the bed. “Alright, that’s it. I order you to get on the bed. Now.”

His head snapped toward you, eyes narrowing. “What?”

“You heard me,” you said, crossing your arms. “Get on the bed. You’re supposed to be resting, not punishing yourself on that glorified piece of cardboard.”

His expression darkened, though the bond had already begun to work its magic. Begrudgingly, he pushed himself up, his movements slow and deliberate as he made his way to the futon.

“This is ridiculous” he grumbled under his breath, sitting stiffly on the edge of the mattress.

“You’re welcome” you quipped, sitting beside him. “See? Much better.”

He huffed, glaring at the wall and edging away from you. He covers his mouth, even with the mask. You think he’d cough but he didn’t. It was your intoxicating smell again. Oh your scent, soft and unmistakably yours, was intoxicating, his Alpha instincts clamoring for more; coupled with the fact you are both sitting on his bed. He could just pounce on you, how he would…

Instead, he shuffled under the covers and hid his face, this great and powerful Oni was acting like a wounded dog.

You put it down to him being dramatic like he usually is.

“Alright, mister grumpy” you say in a sing-song way, standing up and reaching for the damp cloth you’d set aside earlier. “Let’s cool you down again.”

“I don’t need-”

“Shh.” You placed the cloth gently against his forehead, ignoring his protests.

His body tensed under your touch, the warmth of your proximity making his fevered state even harder to bear.

“Why are you so stubborn?” You asked, breaking the silence, sitting on the edge of his futon.

“Why are you so insistent?” he shot back, though his tone lacked its usual bite.

“Because someone has to be,” you replied with a smirk. “You’re hopeless when it comes to taking care of yourself.”

Kunikida frowned, his gaze shifting to the floor. “I’m not used to this” he admitted quietly.

You blinked, surprised by the uncharacteristic vulnerability in his voice. “Used to what?”

“Being taken care of,” he said, his hands clenching into fists. “I’ve always been the one responsible. The one who... fixes things. It’s not my place to burden others.”

Your heart softened at his words, whats with him today? You’ve never seen him so vulnerable. After days of him pushing you out, putting up those walls, he is being so... open?

“Kunikida, that’s not how this works. Taking care of someone doesn’t mean they’re a burden. It just means... you care.”

He turned to look at you, his hazel eyes searching yours. For a moment, the tension between you shifted, something unspoken passing in the space between.

As the silence stretched, Kunikida found his hand moving almost of its own accord, reaching toward yours. The sight of you sitting so close, your gentle expression, your warmth - it was all too much. He wanted to feel the comfort of your touch, to anchor himself to something real amidst the chaos of his instincts.

But as his fingers hovered above yours, his Alpha senses flared. The thought of holding your hand - of touching you - was too tempting, too dangerous. His rut was already simmering beneath the surface, threatening to overtake him.

He pulled back sharply, clenching his fist to steady himself.

“Is something wrong?” You asked, your voice tinged with concern. This isn’t the first time you noticed him staring, threatening to touch you but to no avail.

“No” he said quickly, his tone harsher than intended. “Nothing’s wrong.”

You furrowed a brow, studying him. “You’re acting weird.”

“I’m fine” he said, though the words sounded hollow even to him.

You sighed, leaning back slightly. “You know, for someone who claims to have everything under control, you’re kind of a mess.”

“Excuse me?” he said, narrowing his eyes.

“You heard me” you said with a teasing grin. “A mess. But don’t worry, I’ve got it covered.”

Despite himself, Kunikida felt the corner of his mouth twitch, hidden under his mask. You had a way of disarming him, of making him feel seen in a way that was both terrifying and... grounding.

As you busied yourself tidying the room from lunch, you couldn’t help but glance at him out of the corner of your eye. Despite your constant bickering, there was something undeniably endearing about him - the way he carried himself, the weight of his ideals, the quiet strength beneath his gruff exterior.

And as you watched him, lying there with his golden hair tousled and his usual composure stripped away, a thought began to creep into your mind.

Were you falling for him?

The realization hit you like a ton of bricks, your heart skipping a beat. Shaking your head, you pushed the thought aside, focusing instead on the task at hand.

Kunikida lay on the bed, staring at the ceiling through half-lidded eyes. The fever had ebbed slightly after lunch, but the pressure in his chest, the searing heat in his veins, remained relentless.

His body screamed for something he couldn’t allow himself to take, something forbidden and dangerous. And you were right there, *right there*, separated from him by nothing more than a flimsy curtain.

Through the thin fabric, he could see your curvy silhouette in the kitchen, busy washing up the dishes from lunch. You hummed softly, a sound that inexplicably sent warmth spiraling through him. Kunikida clenched his fists, nails biting into his palms as he tried to quell the rush of primal instincts clawing at his resolve. Minute by minute he could feel the blood rush to his cock, it was maddening.

‘You can’t do this’ he told himself. ‘She’s human. She’s temporary. And you’re supposed to have self-control.’

But that control was slipping fast. The air between you was saturated with your essence, stirring his Alpha instincts into a frenzy. He turned his face into the pillow, willing himself to sleep it off, only to be met with more of your scent from when you slept in the bed the night before. Maybe he could subtly get himself off to your smell on his pillow.

Kunikida self indulgently bucked his hips into the duvet, nose pressed into your pillow as he slowly pulled the mask off the bridge of his nose all the way down until it came completely off, his defences broken, and all he is, is a whimpering mess sniffing your pillow.

However, this momentary bliss was cut short as a sudden sound jolted him upright - a clatter of something hitting the floor, followed by a soft curse. Through the curtain, he saw you reach for a towel, clearly having spilled water on yourself.

“Great,” you muttered, lifting the damp hem of your shirt. “Nice going, Y/N. Real smooth.”

He should have looked away. He knew he should have, but his body refused to listen. Instead, he found himself transfixed as you - thinking no one was watching - pulled the shirt over your head, revealing smooth, glistening skin beneath. The moment his eyes gazed upon your plump breasts hidden under a wet bra, that was it. That was the moment his restraint snapped.

Before you could even process the cool air against your skin, you felt a strong arm wrap around your waist, pulling you back against a solid, searing heat.

“Kunikida-?!” You gasped, your voice faltering as his breath ghosted against the nape of your neck.

He buried his face there, inhaling deeply, his grip tightening as his hand find and cup your breasts, groping and kneading them like fresh dough. “Stop” he murmured, though it sounded more like a plea than a command. “Ask me to stop, command me to stop.”

“I-I don’t?” You asked, voice trembling.

“Please,” he growled lowly, the sound rumbling through his chest. “I can’t hold back any longer.” His fingers snaked into your bra, pulling free your pillowy tits as he marvelled at both size and weight of them. You didn’t pull away, not try to stop him. For whatever reason, his possessiveness and his rawness has you weak at the knees, whimpering as the pads of his thumbs meet and draw circles over your nipples.

“Kunikida, I can’t… I…what’s going on? I thought you were sick.”

“I’m not sick,” he said, his voice a mix of control and desperation. “It’s my rut.”

Your eyes widened, mind racing as pieces fell into place. The fever, the tension, the odd behaviour - it all made sense now. Oh lord, it reminded you of all those fan fictions you’d read before, but now happening to you.

He lifted his head slightly, hazel eyes dark and clouded with something primal. “You shouldn’t be here,” he said, his tone steadier now but no less intense as he gives your breasts another harsh squeeze, eliciting a louder moan from you. “It’s dangerous.”

“Then why didn’t you tell me?” You whimpered.

“Because,” he said, his voice dropping to a rough whisper, “you’re already too tempting as it is. Use your spirit bond, order me away and I can deal with it alone. Tell me to stop touching you…”

Your pulse quickened, the weight of his words sinking in. You felt the warmth of his breath against her ear, the strength of his hold, his cock pressed against your ass - he was a tall ass Oni with equipment that matched the size of him, and more. The throb between your legs gets stronger as you can feel him rut into you, needy and desperate - he was too far gone, and so were you.

“No...” you started, your voice hesitant and filled with arousal. “I can help.”

His grip on your waist faltered for a split second before tightening again. “Y/N…” he warned, his voice thick with conflicted emotion “Master…”

You turned your head slightly to see his eyes, his pupils fully dilated as he succumbs to his instincts. “I mean it” you said, your voice steadier now, a mix of curiosity and determination.

Kunikida’s eyes darkened further, his inner battle clearly visible in the tense line of his jaw. For a moment, he looked like he might say something, but instead, he closed his eyes, exhaling sharply.

“I want- no, need you. But don’t offer things you don’t understand” he said, his tone laced with warning, though his grip didn’t loosen as his restraint teeters on the edge of control.

“But I do,” you challenged softly, your own heart thundering in your chest. “This is an order. Let me help you through your rut”

The room was thick with tension, your words hanging in the air like a fragile thread.

And then, silence.

-

It took a good while to register what happens next. One moment you were standing in the kitchen, half naked and slightly soaked from washing up, the next you are laying on your back on his futon, the weight of a 7ft Oni pressed against you with your legs wrapped around his waist; the past few minutes a total blur.

You’ve never seen Kunikida act in such a way, from a refined perfectionist to a feral creature that can only be compared to a true Yokai; aggressive, powerful and unyielding. Whatever clothes you had on had all but disappeared aside from your bra and underwear, but even then your breasts were uncupped, free for this Oni to devour; and devour he did.

Kunikida spoke no words other than whisper in an ancient language to himself like a prayer as he nipped, tugged and worshipped your breasts with great need, squishing the flesh against his face like he had to survive.

“Kunikida…” you could only moan his name as he ravaged your mounds, pinching and rolling a nipple between his fingers and teeth, drunk on your body already; and he wasn’t even inside yet.

“Doppo. Call me Doppo, master” he rumbled a correction, ever since you granted your body to him, the spirit bond and the primal need to mate combined had made you his master, his little goddess in the sheets. And like a goddess, he praised. Every whisper, every low grumble, in the common tongue or the language of yokai, it was all praise. Finally, you were in his grasp, finally after what seemed to him like an eternity.

“You have no idea…” Kunikida began, moving his face away from your tits to bury it into the nook of your neck. “What you do to me. How dare you stumble into this world and into my bed” he curses you finally, after such blissful praise.

He pulls up to look at you, meeting his angry, horny and possessed eyes. His face is glowing from the heat of his rut, and you could swear his features had shifted, more Oni like. Kunikida was on the cusp of madness, unsure whether to lash out or cry from the intensity.

With his eyes never leaving yours, his hand then travels down your body and smooths two fingers over your quivering pussy, conceived behind some pitifully wet panties. You don’t know who shuddered more, you or him at the sensation. His hand dwarfing yours, as he savoured the feeling on the pads of his fingers, bringing them up to his lips and sucking on his digits.

“Fuck you. All my life planned out and you just had to go and fuck it up”

“Kunikida I’m s-“

Kunikida interrupts you by ramming his fingers he was sucking just a few moments ago into your mouth, watching you gag and whimper from his roughness.

“Let me fucking finish” he commanded, his angry cock smoothing over the wetness of your panties, frictionless, and begging for entry. As an Oni deep in a rut, his cock was almost inhuman, larger than a human with bumps and ridgets that rubbed sinfuly, you wondered however it will fit. Not that you could really think about it, with him pinned hard against his bed, his fingers in your mouth. “Fucking brat. I had my life planned, had my spouse planned but oh no, 15 fucking days and I am hooked, fucking hooked. And for the last time, its Doppo to you, understand?”

You could only nod as Kunikida rambled on, removing his fingers from your mouth as he places either leg on his shoulders so that your pussy was in his face. For a moment he breaths, eyes closed and engraving this scent into his very being. God you were the worst, this must be what the humans call hell, but how delicious this hell was.

“You undo me” he spoke, licking a stripe over your clothed folds and moaning deeply, allowing himself some sort of control in the moment to enjoy the sensations he craved ever since meeting you. “And now, I will undo you��

And with that, his sharp nails rip away your panties leaving you totally exposed to his tongue, which was also inhumanly large. As if by Oni magic, his prehensile tongue dives into you with an unrelenting force, starved a man he is as he stretches your tight hole. You could only cover your face, looking through your fingers as the Oni grips your hips, pulling him closer and deeper into your pussy. Not only all of this, you could feel something within you change, something warm like a soft buzz that radiated all the way into your womb.

“Fuck! Doppo, what is that?”

“Oni magic. Its to make sure you are prepared to take me” he spoke as his tongue moved from clit to hole to clit again, much like Kunikida, his movements were precise, almost practiced to ensure your pleasure. It must be his Alpha, instincts, or Oni instincts, whatever it was, he was working your abused pussy to the brink. “I cannot have my mate in pain”

“Fuckfuckfuckfuck!” You slurred out through babbled moans and whimpers, not exactly hearing what he has to say when his tongue is working your pussy this good. Through your hands, you watched him like a man possessed, praising you with his eyes and his mouth as you neared your impending orgasm.

Feeling you twitch around his tongue which had curled and massaged a particular spot, an arrogant grin crept to his face as he remained there, feeling you edge, edge edge…

“Doppo! Fuck!” You scrunched your eyes as your legs twitch and tremble violently until a single flick of his tongue to your clit had sent you over that dreaded edge. Your juices had squirted right on his tongue, into his mouth and covering his chin.

Lowering your legs, he lets you have a moments respite as you covered your face with pure drunken bliss, panting like a dog. He admired his craft, smoothing two hands over your torso, cupping your breasts and giving them a squeeze.

“What is it? Your bratty mouth ain’t got nothing to say?” He teased, squeezing you again.

“Fuck you”

“No, fuck you” he chuckled darkly, spreading your legs as if opening a holy scroll, eyes watching at each sensitive twitch of your cunt, knowing whats going to happen. “I don’t know if I can hold back any longer, knowing what you taste like” he warned.

For a brief moment, the madness in his eyes softened, almost caring despite being in the thick of it. You took advantage and reached up, needing him closer to you, to take you, but you’d want it your way.

“Then don’t, thats an order”

And as swift as he was before when you made the order, Kunikida’s hands grabbed at your hips and pressed the fat tip of his cock against your entrance; oh how he wanted to savour it, how he wanted to do this slowly so he could truly enjoy the moment, but he can’t, not in this rut.

Lunging forward, every thick, veiny inch stretched your hole open as he bottomed out balls deep inside of you. His bulbous head crushing your cervix, and in normal circumstances, this would hurt like a mother fucker, but whatever Oni magic he used, it felt like pure, unadulterated bliss.

“Fu-uck” the Oni moans out, strangled as he feels the pain of restraint fizzle away. He wasn’t expecting such an easy entry, and yet, there you were, the perfect girl opened wide and speared on his cock.

You reached forward and pulled at his horns, bringing him in for a messy kiss as his hips gyrate slightly so you could get used to his size. Kunikida obliged, tongue twining with yours as his thrusts become more confident, more needy.

The obscene noises made from each push, every wet slap of skin had both your minds hazy and desperate for more. Once again, his rut took hold and his hips were no longer this own, driven by the insanity that is his instincts to mate, to breed.

“Gunna breed this pussy, this -fuck- mine, all fucking mine” he growls under his breath in between kisses, slamming into you with purpose. You heard him, but you couldn’t process his words, too lost in your own pleasure as he fills you up continuously with his red Oni cock. Luckily, his bed was a futon, because he knows if this were a bed with legs, the two of you would have broken it.

“Y’feel that, master?” He hums, pulling away so that he can take a good look at your fucked out face, he gestures to bulge forming at the base of his cock; his knot. “I’m gunna fucking knot you, y’hear?”

Your eyes widen as if breaking the spell of ascension, you are grounded by his boating, by his knot forming, stretching you even wider. Your only response was moans and various curse words, which didn’t satisfy him at all.

“I said,” Kunikida pulls out momentarily and flips you onto your front before filling you once again and again. The new position allowed him to reach deeper, granting his knot entrance into you, and of course, the source of your bonding; the back of your neck. “I’m gunna fuckin’ knot you, knock you up. You’d like that pretty human?”

At this angle, he is able to lean forward, arching your back almost painfully as he thud thud thuds against your cervix, his mouth finally making its way to the nape of your neck, licking the salty sweat that beads down, tempting him, inviting him to bite.

“Y-yes! Fuck pleasepleaseplease” you begged, the knot inflating more and more inside you so that each pull out was becoming more and more impossible. It didn’t stop him though, slamming into you with all his might, with his black nails digging into the fat of your ass as if you would escape him. Every time he pulled out, the tightness of your walls only sucked him back in, the pleasure almost nauseating.

“Is that an order?” He whispered in your ear, hitting that same spot over and over.

“Yes” you babbled out, barely able to speak from the pillow you had buried your face in. Kunikida reaches forward and clasps a hand around your throat to lift your face, hearing more and more of those beautiful moans he had so wished to hear.

“I can’t hear you, master”

“Fuck!! Please, Doppo, thats an order!! Please please knot me, knock me up!” you cried, tears running down your face as you tried your best to speak. Your pussy gripped him tightly and he cursed out, ramming into you one last time as his knot locks you in place. He finds that delicious spot on your neck, biting down with feral need and piercing your skin with his fangs.

“Fuck!” You cried once more, from both pleasure and pain as your womb is pumped full of copious amounts of thick, Oni seed. Kunikida was driven beyond insanity, never letting your neck go as he could feel ropes upon ropes spill into you, hot and full of him.

This lasted a full 2 minutes.

-

After a little while, Kunikida finally let go of your neck, licking the droplets of blood from your wound and kissed them like you were precious. The post nut clarity kicking in as he realised what he’s just done; you are now his, he now yours, beyond the spirit bond contract.

He held you for a little eternity before rolling to his side, his knot taking you with him as he laid with you, burying his face where he had bit you and continuously kissing the spot as a silent apology.

The world cleared in your mind as you regained conscious thought. What the fuck did you just do? You allowed an Oni to mark you, just as you thought you would be rid of him in a fortnight, you had given your entire being to him.

As much as it frightened you, all of his tender kisses and affections eased any worry; even just a little. You were warm, you were safe, you were…happy.

The room was heavy with the aftermath of your union, the air thick with a new, undeniable bond.

Your fingers brushed the faint wound on your neck as your mind swirled with everything that had just happened. You tilted your head slightly, wincing at the sting on your neck.

“Does it hurt?” Kunikida’s voice was softer now, but there was an edge of concern as his hazel eyes flickered down to where you brushed at your wound.

“A little,” you admitted, running your fingers absently over the spot. “You have sharp teeth, you know.”

Kunikida huffed, his lips twitching into a rare smile. “I wasn’t exactly in full control of myself.”

“Understatement of the century” you teased, your voice light despite the lingering tension in your chest.

“You’re hardly innocent in this” he retorted, but there was no venom in his words, just the usual bickering that now felt more like home than annoyance.

You turn your face slightly to him, your gaze locking with his. “I suppose that makes us even.”

For a moment, neither of you spoke. Kunikida’s hand rested on your stomach which had bulged with the sheer size of his cock and knot, his thumb drawing slow, deliberate circles against your skin. The contact was grounding, comforting in a way that surprised you both.

“You realize,” he began, his voice quieter now, “we barely know each other.”

“And yet here we are,” you said softly, your lips quirking up into a small smile. “You’re stuck with me now, Oni-boy.”

Kunikida chuckled lowly, a sound so rare it made your heart skip a beat. “Don’t remind me. I was just starting to enjoy the thought of getting rid of you.”

“Charming” you raised your brows. “Though I am surprised, you spent the last two weeks lecturing me about rules, traditions, and how annoying I am. And yet you choose me as your mate?”

“You are annoying,” he muttered, though the faintest blush spread across his cheeks. “But… I suppose you’re also tolerable. Occasionally.”

“Tolerable?!” You feigned annoyance, “That’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever said to me. Be still, my heart.”

Kunikida groaned, covering his face into your neck. “This is exactly why I preferred you asleep.”

Your laughter rang through the room, warm and bright. You reached for his arm and brought his hand to your lips for a quick kiss. “You’re not so bad yourself” you murmured.

After a moment of silence, Kunikida spoke again. “I meant what I said,” he said quietly, his usual stern tone softened. “You’re mine now, Y/N. Not because of the spirit bond, but because of this.” His fingers brushed the fresh mark on your neck, reverence in his touch.

“And you’re mine” you replied, your voice steady despite the weight of your words.

His hazel eyes darkened, and for a moment. “Do you regret it?”

You paused, considering. You thought of your family, the mortal realm, everything you’d left behind - and then you thought of him. The way he held you, the way his guarded nature softened just enough to let you in. And it wasn’t exactly like you couldn’t visit the mortal realm and see your family and friends again, but it would just be different.

“No,” you said finally, your voice resolute. “Do you?”

Kunikida didn’t answer right away. Instead, he pulled you closer, pressing a lingering kiss to the back of your head. “No,” he murmured against your hair. “It feels… right. You feel right.”

You closed your eyes, letting his words wash over you. For the first time since you fell into the well, you felt like you were exactly where you were meant to be.

“I guess we’ll figure the rest out,” you said, your tone light but laced with meaning.

“We will” he agreed, his voice firm.

A content silence fell again, your bodies still locked into place. You didn’t bother asking how long the two of you were going to be like this for, mostly because you didn’t care. You relished this feeling, this warmth and this comfort.

As the quiet stretched on, Kunikida’s voice broke the comfortable stillness. “Just one other thing,” he said, his tone carrying that familiar weight of seriousness, “that after what we’ve done, raising our young will be a priority.”

You, who had been trailing your fingers lazily along his forearm, froze. You lifted your head to look at him, your mouth opening and closing as if trying to find the right words. “Our… young?”

“Yes.” His eyes met yours, completely earnest. “It’s only natural. Ensuring their future would be the next logical step. I’ve always envisioned how I’d raise them - structured, disciplined, with proper values and-”

“Wait, wait, wait,” you interrupted, holding up a hand. Your lips twitched, caught somewhere between laughter and sheer panic. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, Oni-boy.”

Kunikida frowned, his brow furrowing. “What do you mean?”

You sighed, lifting up your arm. You tapped the small, barely noticeable bump beneath your skin with a sheepish grin. “This little miracle of modern medicine? Contraceptive implant. So… no young. Not anytime soon, anyway.”

For a moment, Kunikida just stared, his expression unreadable. Then, with a deep exhale, his entire being relaxed. Relief flashed across his face, but it was quickly replaced by something else - mild disappointment, tinged with the faintest hue of frustration.

“Well,” he muttered, his voice gruff, “I suppose that simplifies things for now.”

You bit back a laugh at his conflicted tone. “I’m flattered, really. But maybe let’s take it one step at a time? I just became an honorary Oni, after all.”

Kunikida shot you a pointed look. “The moment you return to the mortal realm,” he said, his tone firm but laced with exasperation, “we are getting that thing removed.”

“Sure thing,” you teased, grinning as you wiggled your hips slightly to get comfortable in his embrace. “Right after I make an appointment for a vasectomy for you.”

His groan of exasperation was drowned out by your teasing laughter. Though you bickered like usual, the bond between you was stronger than ever - unshakable, undeniable, and all yours.

[baizhoobies]

Now on holiday for Christmas, you know what that means…? ꫂ ၴႅၴ

Answering asks, matchups and more Kunikida chapters ~

[baizhoobies]

Hey how's the ovulation going

im a danger to myself and others

[baizhoobies]

𝐎𝐧𝐢 𝐃𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐀𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐲…?

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟔

Synopsis: f!Reader somehow finds herself trapped in the spirit realm. Whoops. She entrusts the help of a Yokai Detective Agency to get her back to the mortal realm where she belongs. Wait? A detective agency? In the spirit realm? And the only way of escape is to work with a disgruntled and hot headed Oni who is somehow spiritually bound to her? Sheesh.

A multichapter, Kamisama Kiss inspired story with your favourite Bungo man. Or at least, my favourite ~

Warnings: 18+, eventual smut, violence, swearing, blood mention, monsterfucking, knotting, ruts, omegaverse vibes, breeding

A/N: YAY another chapter! Starting to heat up now. Thinking of making a playlist for this fic, what do you think?

Chapter Warnings: suggestive, masturbation, possessiveness, strong omegaverse themes, Dazai is a dick but we know that

Masterlist

‘Warm��so warm…’

Kunikida inhaled a long breath, a kind of breath that sang relief across his whole body. It came with a peace he’d never known before, like his soul had gone to the spa or a month long holiday. As he slowly regained consciousness, he felt himself pressed against something, something warm and soft which smelled amazing and hugged it tightly. ‘Gods, this feels good’ he thought to himself at whatever this comforting sensation is. He could feel is arms instinctively pull the source of bliss towards his body, squishing it and nuzzling his face into a crook.

As he woke up more, his eyes flickered open and his breath hitched as he registered your unmistakable form curled into his embrace. His chest was pressed against your back, his face nestled so close to your neck, dangerously close to spot where he could just…

Kunikida’s Alpha instincts flared to life, and an unsettling wave of heat surged through him that went straight to his balls. He was laying there, spooning you, with his cock pressed up against your soft ass and his lips were where your scent glands would be, had you been an Oni.

‘What in the spirit realm is this…?’

Panic set in as he became acutely aware of your scent. It wasn’t just human anymore - no, it was different, richer, more enticing. It was distinctly omega-like, laced with a warmth that tugged at something primal deep inside him. The overwhelming sensation made his breath hitch, his fangs aching with the suppressed urge to mark you.

Kunikida jerked his head back, his cheeks flushing furiously. ‘Absolutely not. Control yourself.’ He clenched his fists to regain composure, though his inner Alpha was screaming otherwise.

He carefully untangled himself, slipping out of bed with the precision of someone defusing a bomb. You stirred slightly, murmuring in your sleep, and Kunikida froze again. But you didn’t wake, and he exhaled a quiet sigh of relief before stepping back and rubbing his temples.

‘This spirit bond is going to be the end of me.’

Kunikida escaped into the bathroom and looked down at the rather large problem protruding from his pyjama pants. He was tempted to rub one out quickly to solve the problem, but it felt wrong with you being in the other room. He tried his best to conjure up the most hideous images, mostly of Dazai sucking the juices out of a crab shell that one time. That would have done the trick until he hears you in the bedroom turning in your sleep, letting out a sleepy groan.

Then boom. His dick stood to attention once more. Is that what you would sound like beneath him? His fingers circling your clit as you begged him for more. Or maybe its the sound you’d make as he slips his knot into you, locking you together and pumping your womb to the brim with his cum.

‘Stop’ he slaps his forehead over and over to try and clear any of those images, but it was too late. He felt like he was entering a rut again, and thats a week of pure hell, and with you being there in close proximity? He wonders if there is a fate worse than hell. How could he be so stupid and let his guard down in his sleep? His dick was literally in the curve of your ass, his face against your neck, he could have, he would have…

Nothing he could do could quell the throbbing need in his loins, so he did the only thing to solve the issue. He leaned against the sink, one hand palming his cock and with the other to cover his mouth as to stifle his moans. He runs his thumb over his shaft, his fingers wrapped around his cock and begins to tug slowly. Kunikida can still smell yourself on him and it dizzied his mind, it was if he was imprinting your scent right into his being as he jerked himself off. His voice raspy from sleep and arousal left his lips, doing everything in his power to quiet them, beads of precum dribble from his slit as his pace quickened.

His mouth salivates at the thought of you - instead of his hand it would be the warm and wet body of the woman currently laying in his bed. His bed. His teeth sinking into your neck and claiming you. Everything ached, his cock, his balls, even his tongue yearned to taste the droplets of blood from your throat. His pace quickens once more as he drives himself closer to the edge.

‘Need…need…need…’

Once he relieved himself, he splashed water on his face to to chase away the heat pooling in his chest - Kunikida decided to channel his restless energy into something productive. Breakfast. Yes, that was a perfectly normal, responsible thing to do.

He busied himself in the kitchen, preparing a traditional breakfast. Rice, miso soup, grilled fish, tamagoyaki - all executed with a precision that calmed his chaotic thoughts. By the time he placed the tray together, the sight of it was enough to pull his mind back to a state of order.

Carrying the tray carefully, he re-entered the bedroom through the curtain and set it on the nightstand. You stirred again, this time blinking awake.

"Morning" Kunikida said, attempting to sound neutral.

You squinted at him, then at the tray, then back at him. “Breakfast in bed? Did I die or is this another alternate universe where you’re nice to me?”

He cleared his throat, ignoring the jab. “You need to eat properly to keep your strength up. That’s all.”

“Oh, is that all? Not because you felt like being sweet or anything?” You grinned, sitting up and stretching. You notice how red his face was, is he embarrassed? “Aw, you’re blushing.”

Kunikida bristled. “I am not blushing.” Of course Kunikida couldn’t just outright say he jerked off to the thought of you being pressed against him, your scent, or the indescribable need to mark you as his.

You accepted the tray, taking in the artfully arranged breakfast with an impressed hum. “Okay, I’m teasing, but this actually looks amazing. You never fail to impress. Guess grumpiness isn’t your only talent.”

He crossed his arms and frowned. “I’ll take that as a compliment. Eat quickly - we have a lot to do today.”

You snickered but obliged, taking a bite of the tamagoyaki. “Mmm. You’re forgiven for being a grump.”

As you ate, Kunikida watched you for a few moments. He liked watching you eat - among other things - but he takes pride in his culinary skills, despite claiming its nothing more than a necessity. He found himself taking note of the way you smiled with each bite, as if you were tasting food for the very first time; and this, made him happy. Satisfied was a word he would not use but he certainly felt it. Realising he’d been staring for far too long, his usual ‘work minded’ instincts kick in and opened his notebook, going over the plans for the day.

“We’re heading to the agency for more paperwork. There are still details to finalize about the Tanuki incident. You’ll stay near my desk and once again, refrain from touching anything.”

You raised a brow. “Paperwork again? That mission felt like centuries ago, what else is there to finalise? Don’t Oni have something more exciting to do? When can we go on another mission?”

“We do plenty of fieldwork, though the fact we’ve not been on another mission is a blessing,” he replied stiffly. “It means things are quiet, and thats a good thing. Missions aside, logistics are just as important as combat. Chaos is unacceptable.”

“Right. And nothing about my presence here screams chaos?” You teased.

Kunikida adjusted his glasses, averting his gaze. “Your presence does require additional… adjustments. But that doesn’t mean I’ll let things descend into disorder.”

You snorted, amused by how rigid he was. “Fine, Mr. Perfect. But only if you promise not to leave me sitting there bored for hours again.”

He hesitated, then sighed. “I’ll find something for you to do.”

Your eyes sparkled with mischief. “How thoughtful. You really are a big softie, aren’t you?”

His cheeks darkened, and he muttered something unintelligible, causing you to laugh.

The domestic quiet between you was unexpectedly pleasant, though Kunikida would never admit it. As he got himself ready for work, he would occasionally steal glances as you prepared for the day. Your teasing smile, the way you bent down to pick up your clothes, it all stirred something he was too stubborn to name. And that lingering omega-like scent… it was maddening.

His dick twinged once again and he had to quickly focus on something else. This morning was off to a bad start, how could this mortal cause so much trouble for him? Spirit bond or otherwise.

‘just a few more weeks’ he reminded himself. ‘I can endure this for 20 more days’

As you stepped out into the perpetual twilight of the spirit realm, you nudged him with your elbow, a sincere smile on your lips.

“Thanks for breakfast in bed, Kunikida. You’re not so bad when you’re not grumbling at me.”

He clicked his tongue, refusing to look at you. “Don’t get used to it.”

But the tiniest ghost of a smile tugged at the corner of his lips as you headed toward the agency.

-

The Armed Detective Agency office was buzzing with its usual low hum of activity. Papers shuffled, phones rang, and somewhere in the background, Ranpo could be heard loudly demanding snacks. You sat perched at Kunikida’s desk, your head resting in your hands, watching him neatly organise a stack of documents. It was, in your words, the very definition of “thrilling.”

Kunikida once again looked in your direction before quickly looking away once he’s noticed your staring. ‘Damn this woman. What is she even looking at?’ He thought, burying his face in his work. You noticed him too, the way his hazel eyes softened when he gazed up at you. There was a blossom of satisfaction in your chest, a tension in your stomach you could only recognise as a ‘fuzzy feeling’. It was…nice, that he would look up at you whilst he worked. A subtle reminder that he still thought of you even when he was in ‘work mode’. As much as you weren’t his biggest fan, it made your heart flutter.

He did it once more, then twice, and right before either of you could say anything, Dazai appeared out of nowhere, as if summoned by the mere scent of impending chaos.

“Y/N!” Dazai greeted you with a wide grin, pulling up a chair beside you. “And how are you enjoying life under the care of our dear Kunikida? He’s not too much of a tyrant, is he?”

“Define ‘tyrant’” you teased, earning a sharp glare from Kunikida.

Dazai leaned closer to you, lowering his voice conspiratorially. “If he’s giving you trouble, you can always run to me. I promise to treat you with the utmost care”

You blinked, this man was getting a little too close for comfort, but when you noticed Kunikida’s frustrated eyes at the pair of you, you couldn’t help but snort. Boredom was a killer, and you find yourself once again wanting to see how far you could push the easily aggravated Oni; youre starting to sound like Dazai.

“Wow, are you always this charming?” You take his hand in yours, idly playing with his fingers; your eyes never leaving Kunikida’s to see any and all reactions.

“Only for someone as radiant as you,” Dazai replied with a wink, returning the gesture as he ran his thumb over your knuckles.

From his place at the desk, Kunikida’s instincts went haywire. How dare he just swoop in and…is that you holding his hand? Unacceptable. The grip on his pen tightened audibly, causing the pen to crack.

Dazai glanced at him with innocent curiosity. “Oh, Kunikida, is something wrong? You seem tense. Surely it’s not because of little ol’ me?”

“I’m fine” Kunikida snapped through gritted teeth. “Why don’t you go do something productive for once?”

“But I am being productive,” Dazai said, flashing a mischievous grin. “I’m making your mistress feel welcome. Unlike someone, who just barks at her.”

You smirked, enjoying the interplay. “He does bark a lot.”

Kunikida’s eye twitched. “You’re both insufferable.”

Despite getting close to boiling point, Dazai wasn’t done yet. He leaned closer to you, his voice dropping into a mock-serious tone. “You know, Y/N, remember what I told you the other day about Kunikida?”

“Oh?” You questioned, raising an eyebrow. “What was that again? I need reminding”

Kunikida snapped his head up, his instincts immediately on high alert. “Dazai…”

Ignoring the warning, Dazai pulled out a slim, notebook from his jacket. Kunikida’s notebook.

“Behold!” Dazai declared, holding it up like a prize. “The holy grail of Kunikida’s principles. But more importantly - his list of the 58 traits for his ideal woman!”

You choke back a laugh. “Ah yes! I remember now, Kunikida’s infamous list. Is it really that ridiculous?”

“Ridiculous is an understatement,” Dazai said, flipping open the notebook. “Let’s see… Ah!“

“How did you swipe that you bastard?! Give that back!” Kunikida barked, launching from his chair. His arms reach desperately for his notebook, only for Dazai to pull it away and flick through some of the pages.

“Number three: ‘She must be skilled in domestic tasks, especially cooking and cleaning’. Number twenty-two: ‘She must appreciate the finer points of literature and poetry.’” Dazai reads aloud with gusto.

You sat there, struggling to contain your laughter, tears forming in the corners of your eyes. “This is gold. Please tell me there’s more.”

“There’s plenty more!” Dazai grinned, flipping further down the list. “Oh, look at this! Number thirty-six: ‘She must-‘”

Kunikida lunged, grabbing Dazai by the collar and yanking him to his feet. “I said give it back!”

“Oh no! An Alpha protecting his precious notebook!” Dazai cried, feigning distress.

Kunikida growled low in his throat, hauling Dazai off his feet and throttles him. You lean back in your chair, still giggling uncontrollably as you watch they two of them like some kind of comedy act.

When Kunikida finally pried the notebook from Dazai’s hands and shoved him away, he turned to you, looking thoroughly frazzled.

“Don’t encourage him,” he snapped. “He thrives on chaos.”

You held up your hands, still chuckling. “Hey, don’t blame me. I didn’t steal your precious notebook.”

“You didn’t stop him, either” Kunikida grumbled, sitting down heavily and burying his face in his hands.

Dazai, now lounging on a nearby desk, smirked. “You’re welcome, Y/N. I hope you learned something valuable today.”

“Oh, definitely” you replied, resting your chin in your hand as you shot a teasing glance at Kunikida. “I’ve learned that he’s a lot pickier than I thought.”

Kunikida groaned, wishing he could sink into the floor. “Its a guideline, not necessarily rules”

“Oh?” You quirked an eyebrow. “Are there any nonnegotiables?”

“Don’t push it”

After that humiliation, Kunikida returned to work, something about his schedule and that he is too behind on work to deal with Dazai’s insistent teasing. Though the fact that you knew about this list, had heard a few ‘guidlines’ was too much for Kunikida to bare. He knew he’d have to do a better job of keeping his notebook safe from Dazai from now on.

Kunikida curses to himself as he worked, what was Dazai trying to do?! Tease, of course, but using you against him? Unbelievable!

The office fell quiet once more, save for the soft scratching of pens against paper and the occasional shuffle of documents. You remained sat at Kunikida’s desk, trying to occupy yourself while Kunikida sifted through several documents.

Dazai, however, was not one to leave well enough alone. He perched on the edge of a nearby desk, idly flipping through papers that definitely weren’t his.

“Y/N,” he began, his voice dripping with mischief, “I’ve been thinking.”

“Uh-oh” Kunikida muttered under his breath, not looking up from his work. ‘Not another round of torment, please’.

“That sounds dangerous” You smirked, leaning on your hand to look at him.

Dazai grinned. “Oh, it is. You see, I’ve realized something very important.” He leaned closer, his expression mock-serious. “As an unattached Oni, I find myself unbound. Free. Lonely, even.”

“Dazai” Kunikida said sharply, his pen stilling mid-sentence.

Dazai ignored him, his gaze fixed on you. “I thought it be in your best interest to know that if an Oni bonds with an omega mortal, she or he can pass to and from the spirit realm. I can speak for the rest of us, we’ve gotten quite used to having you here” He points a sharp nailed finger at you. “Let me bite you, Y/N! I’ll make you my omega!”

The room fell silent for a beat.

You stared at him blankly for a for moments before bursting out laughing. “Are you serious?”

Even though you are laughing, thats quite the interesting bit of information. Could this mean you could come back to the spirit realm whenever you wanted? You could visit family and friends in the mortal realm? Part of you didn’t believe it, you couldn’t, it was too good to be true. Well, not completely good, the only downside is bonding and…mating with an Oni. And no offence to anyone there, none of the Oni quite met up to your standards; or at least, you refuse to believe so. Your eyes dart to Kunikida, who looks like he is struggling to keep out of the conversation as much as possible, visibly shaking with what you assumed to be irritation.

“Deadly serious” Dazai said, though his tone suggested otherwise. “Imagine it! You and I, a perfect pairing. I’d be the dashing Beta, and you’d be my radiant Omega. We’d make such a statement in the spirit realm. Plus, one free ticket to the mortal realm - ah, it has been wayyyy too long since I’ve seen sunlight!”

“Absolutely not” you said bluntly, holding up a hand in the devilish Oni’s direction. Dazai was the last Oni you would ever pair with.

“Why not?” Dazai asked, feigning hurt. “I’m kind, intelligent, handsome- ”

“Because you’re an absolute nightmare” you interrupted, grinning.

“Welllll thats fair” Dazai admitted with a shrug. He tilted his head thoughtfully. “Still, you might want to reconsider. The offer stands. When you finish whatever you’ve got going on with Kunikida, I’ll be keeping the bed warm”

Kunikida slammed his hand on the desk, finally snapping. “That’s enough!”

Both Dazai and you turned to look at him, startled by the sharpness in his tone. Kunikida glared at Dazai, his jaw tight and his knuckles white where they gripped the desk.

“She’s not your omega, shes not even an omega! Also, she’s not some prize for you to joke about!” he spoke coldly. He would be damned if he allowed Dazai to even so much as touch a strand of hair on your head, let alone mating and claiming you. That should be his job.

Dazai blinked, then a slow, sly smile spread across his face. “Oh, I see. My apologies, Kunikida. I didn’t realize you felt so… strongly.”

Kunikida flushed but didn’t respond, turning his attention back to his paperwork with more force than necessary. You frowned, sensing the tension in the air. There was an awkward, pregnant silence that hung heavy between the three of you. At least, until Dazai whistled and turned on his heel.

“Well its been fun but-”

Kunikida shot him another glare to make him stop speaking altogether, but this time it worked. Dazai disappeared somewhere down the hall, probably off to find another excuse not to work, leaving you and Kunikida at his desk, silent as the grave.

-

The rest of the day seemed to drag, and by the time you were ready to leave, the atmosphere between Kunikida and yourself was strained. You walked beside him in silence, your earlier amusement replaced by a gnawing unease.

Inside Kunikida’s mind was a whirlwind, ticking things over and over, his jealousy, mixed with damaged pride had reached boiling point, that, coupled with the fact that his instincts are going CRAZY. He’s not entered a rut in what felt like years, and this was not helping. It can’t be a rut, surely. The denial ran thick, it was everything piling up that’s got him like this. The jealousy, the possessiveness, the yearning. God! He doesn’t even like you, well maybe a little…maybe a lot…nah definitely not…Unless?

Whatever the case, he fears that even one word out of you could lead to a disaster.

‘How dare she?’ He thought, giving you a sideways glance and noticing the way you walked, the way you breathed, your scent, that agonising, tantalising scent was enough to drive this Oni to madness. He didn’t need you or Dazai to push him over an edge he was barely keeping himself up on. ‘Meddlesome woman, cruel, evil, tempting woman’.

As you reached the empty hallway leading to the exit, Kunikida suddenly stopped, with all his internal ramblings about how annoying, how irritating and how frustrating you are, he finally admitted to himself the familiar feeling that he had simply written off as the spirit bond. His rut. He couldn’t tell you, how could he? As far as he knew, you hated him, and he hated you - even if you both know that isn’t true. He hesitated, frozen, too scared to move because the second he allows his rut to kick in, its game over, regardless of feelings. You turned to look at him, confused.

“Kunikida?” You asked. And that was it, the trigger he had hoped would never come. Before you could say more, he stepped forward, backing you up against the wall.

“Kunikida, what-”

His hands were braced on either side of you, caging you in with his giant Oni form. His golden eyes, sharp and intense, locked onto yours, and you could feel your breath hitch. He was so close, and his expression seemingly unreadable except for the intense glare. It was a hunger in his eyes and the sheer power behind it that commanded authority. Now you weren’t one for submission but this…

“You need to understand something,” he said, his voice low and rough. “This… bond between us? It’s not a game. It’s not something to be taken lightly.”

“I-I never said it was,” you stammered, your heart pounding in your chest as his face inches closer to yours. Despite mostly looking human, he was unmistakably an Oni; with the growl and temper of one as well.

He leaned in slightly, the faintest trace of heat radiating from him. You could feel the tension in his frame, the struggle he was waging with himself. His gaze flicked to your neck, where the scent of you, faint but intoxicating, lingered.

For one agonizing moment, you thought he might actually bite you. Would you let him? Something about how he’s trapped you is…well whatever it is, you just stand there and almost take it.

“You think it is so hilarious to team up with Dazai, that bastard Oni, and antagonise me the entire day? Well I am so sorry princess, but you’ll learn to regret it. I’ll-”

As quickly as he caged you in, he then pulled back sharply, as if burned. He could feel himself taking control of his instincts once more, only to be replaced by a dulling shame.

“Forget it” he muttered, his tone clipped and cold. Stepping away, he turned his gaze away from yours with a guarded expression. “Let’s go.”

You blink, then blink again, trying to process what just happened. You’re still pressed against the wall, like a deer in the headlights before pulling yourself together.

“Kunikida-”

“Don’t” he said, his voice leaving no room for argument.

He walked ahead without looking back, leaving you standing there before reluctantly following behind him. ‘What the fuck was that about?’.

-

The walk home was quiet and tense, each step echoed along the street in a drawn out, tense silence. He didn’t even turn to look as to whether you were right behind him; you supposed that he would know by instinct as to whether you had gone missing, or at least the spirit bond would alert him. Even so, you would normally catch Kunikida looking behind, making sure you were safe - and in those moments you felt safe, protected even. But now? You had feared your teasing went too far, maybe too many buttons were pressed, maybe you really were annoying as he said you were. Many many excruciating thoughts fly through your head.

You try to think logically, surely he was just having an off day? Maybe he will just get over it and be done with you once the thirty days were up. Whatever the case, by the time you reached Kunikida’s dorm, you couldn’t take it anymore.

“You want to talk about what happened back there?” You asked, your voice carefully neutral. You try to reach a hand out to rest a reassuring hand on his shoulder, but he moved away quickly before you could touch.

“No” Kunikida said curtly, not meeting your gaze.

“Fine” you huffed, crossing your arms. “But whatever’s going on, we’re stuck together for the next few weeks, so you’d better figure it out.”

Kunikida paused, his hand on the door. For a moment, you thought he might respond, but instead, he opened the door and stepped inside.

You could only follow in silence, occasionally glancing in Kunikida’s direction to see that he was purposefully obscuring his face from you. You felt pangs of guilt, followed by frustration, followed by guilt again. Did you really piss him off that much he won’t even look at you? That he won’t even let you look at his face?

• Next Chapter ->

[baizhoobies]

cheffing up some smut in the next chapter of Oni Detective Agency 🤭

[baizhoobies]

WHAT THEIR LOVE FEELS LIKE . . .

. . . ft. BSD men

⊹ ATSUSHI NAKAJIMA . . . freshly steamed rice, sherpa blankets, the moon in the sky during the day, well-loved dirt paths, comfortable sweatpants, clean kitchens, perfectly made lemonade, finding a dollar in your pocket, gentle cat paws, scratching a lover's back.

⊹ OSAMU DAZAI . . . used books with vigilant annotations in them, jazz music, charm bracelets, quiet and steady streams, lined leather journals, light rain, flickering flourescent light, cracking the spine of a new novel, knowing looks, linking pinkies while walking, caramel drizzle.

⊹ CHUUYA NAKAHARA . . . boozy chocolate-covered cherries, leather car interior, red sangria, gold jewelry, peeled clementines, extinguished matches, the peaceful room next door to a party, counting a lover's freckles, cupping your hands around a flame, divine geometry.

⊹ AKUTAGAWA RYUUNOSUKE . . . star anise, black lace, fig jam, perfect puddles of rainwater, vanilla ice cream, soft distant thunder, silver jewelry, blackberry-stained lips and fingertips, tracing sweet words into a lover's palm, the moment of silence and peace when you pass beneath a bridge while it rains.

⊹ RANPO EDOGAWA . . . shortbread cookies, wool socks, poppies, stray eyelashes, strawberry jam, argyle and pastels, candied fruit, chess matches, foil-wrapped chocolates with sweet sayings inside, when a dog at a party likes you best, collections of old keys, shooting stars.

⊹ DOPPO KUNIKIDA . . . peonies, perfectly pulled shots of espresso, letters with broken wax seals, comfortable routines, toffee and brown sugar, freshly ironed clothes, finding something that's been lost, completed to-do lists, cats sleeping atop stacks of books.

⊹ YUKICHI FUKUZAWA . . . photo albums hidden in plain sight, flickering candles, the breeze on a cloudy beach, stars on a clear night, perfectly steeped tea, crackling fireplaces, a safety net, clean sheets and pillowcases, crisp mountain air, packing a lover's lunch in the morning.

⊹ SAKUNOSUKE ODA . . . steam from a bath, soft and implacable floral scents, typewriter font, concentric tree circles, fallen bird feathers, uplifting newspaper headlines, children's laughter, protective hugs from behind, stratus clouds like blankets over the sky, dreams that make you want to sleep longer.

⊹ ANGO SAKAGUCHI . . . brown italian leather, vintage cameras, subtle gemstone details, warm french bread, fancy bookmarks, polaroids in your wallet, tying a lover's shoes, laughing at everything when you've drank a bit too much, dried rosemary and blood orange and pomegranate.

⊹ FYODOR DOSTOEVSKY . . . frost-covered cranberries, string music, coffee table books on classical art, accidental halos of light, perfectly toasted marshmallows, the crunch of fresh snow beneath your boot, coconut and dark chocolate, a stray cat trusting you to pet it.

⊹ NIKOLAI GOGOL . . . pistachio ice cream, mourning doves on a wire, strands of pearls, opalescence, sitting side by side at a piano, salt water taffy, blowing a perfect bubble with your gum, the television flickering as you sleep, cradling a lover's face, banana pudding trifle.

⊹ SIGMA . . . fresh linen smell, rose gardens, pressed flowers, sleek dress shoes, swan necks in the shape of a heart, satin and silk, bouquets in translucent cellophane, sleeves wide enough to fit someone else's arms in, lace folding fans, white chocolate truffles.

[baizhoobies]

To the same followers liking my little self indulgent Oni!Kunikida series, I love you and appreciate you

[baizhoobies]

𝐎𝐧𝐢 𝐃𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐀𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐲…?

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟓

Synopsis: f!Reader somehow finds herself trapped in the spirit realm. Whoops. She entrusts the help of a Yokai Detective Agency to get her back to the mortal realm where she belongs. Wait? A detective agency? In the spirit realm? And the only way of escape is to work with a disgruntled and hot headed Oni who is somehow spiritually bound to her? Sheesh.

A multichapter, Kamisama Kiss inspired story with your favourite Bungo man. Or at least, my favourite~

Warnings: 18+, eventual smut, violence, swearing, blood mention, monsterfucking, knotting, ruts, omegaverse vibes, breeding

A/N: Oh we are so back! The perks of having time off work ill means I can just write and write and write. I felt like writing a domestic chapter - I wanted, I delivered. Reader is having fun using her spirit bond powers and Kunikida is obviously thrilled that she seems to be having fun with it. Enjoy!

Chapter Warnings: none really, maybe abuse of power(?), domesticity to its fullest

Masterlist

It had been a few of days since you fell into the spirit realm, everything still seemed so surreal and yet, you somehow felt like you fit right in. As the only known human in this world, you were a foreigner, a target, and yet since eating the spirit realm’s food, your distinct human scent had almost faded completely; and with it, you had a new found freedom. You no longer felt the weight of curious or hostile stares whenever you walked through the Agency or passed nearby Oni. It wasn’t perfect - some might still catch a whiff of something unusual if they got too close, but it was enough for Kunikida to declare you “fit for low-risk outings”, though his tone had been reluctant, as if he already regretted agreeing to bring you along.

Now, as you stepped into the bustling streets of the spirit realm’s version of Yokohama, you could only stare in awe.

It was an uncanny blend of the familiar, traditional and the fantastical. Neon signs flickered alongside talismans strung from lantern posts. Stalls lined the streets, their vendors selling everything from traditional Oni-crafted kimonos to intricately carved charms pulsing faintly with spiritual energy. Spirit foxes darted through the crowds, their ethereal forms slipping in and out of sight, while customers haggled in a mishmash of languages both human and otherwise.

“Wow,” you breathed, turning in a slow circle. “This is... kind of amazing. It’s like Yokohama, but-”

“Better?” Kunikida interjected as he walked beside you, his tone somewhat of a tease.

“I was going to say ‘weirder,’ but sure” you replied, grinning.

“Focus,” he said, adjusting the strap of the satchel slung across his shoulder. “We’re here for supplies, not sightseeing. Don’t wander off.”

“Yes, sir” you said, rolling your eyes as you fell into step beside him. Something about the way you said ‘sir’ had him spiral for a moment before distracting himself with the matter at hand. You glanced at the long list he held in one hand, the meticulously written characters lined up with military precision. “What’s on the list?”

“Essential supplies for the Agency,” Kunikida replied, barely sparing you a glance. “Spiritual ink for talismans, powdered silver for protective barriers, enchanted paper for contracts…” He continued rattling off items, his tone serious and efficient.

You stifled a laugh. “You really are a Boy Scout, aren’t you? Let me guess, you colour-code the list too?”

“It’s organized by priority and location” he said without missing a beat.

You could only snicker to yourself before whispering under your breath. “Of course it is.”

As you wandered deeper into the market, you found yourself gazing at the harmonious coexistence of traditional and modern elements. One stall sold what looked like enchanted scrolls, while the next offered a variety of groceries that glowed softly, must be some spirit realm exclusive food. Across the street, a bustling café displayed a menu of spiritual teas alongside what appeared to be a standard coffee machine.

Your curiosity got the better of you as you stopped at a stall displaying small figurines. They were delicately carved, each one a miniature representation of different Yokai. You picked up a tiny, snarling Oni and held it up to Kunikida.

“This one looks like you,” you teased.

Kunikida glanced at the figure, unimpressed. “That one’s smiling.”

“It’s snarling,” you corrected, laughing. “But sure, if that’s your idea of a smile…”

He sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. “Stop wasting time and put it back. We have work to do.”

You returned the figure with a dramatic flourish, but your grin lingered as you trailed after him. You found yourself enjoying more and more of your gentle teasing, watching the way his brows furrow and an exacerbated breath leaves his lips. Your favourite is when Dazai is around, so you could team up and really grind his gears. For whatever reason, just winding him up and watching him explode in frustration was a satisfaction to you; especially when you catch him off guard and you could swear you could see a faint smile on his face - oh yeah, those reactions are your favourite.

Walking from one stand to another, you reached a stall selling the powdered silver Kunikida needed, and while he haggled with the vendor - your mind drifted at the thought that he, of all Oni’s was an Alpha. You watched him haggle with a diplomatic, yet dominant presence, somehow making the negotiation strangely intimidating.

You couldn’t shake the thought of what Yosano and Dazai had said a few days ago about the Spirit Realm’s mating system. The fact that Kunikida was an Alpha was still... a lot to process. Every time you looked at him now, you couldn’t help but wonder how much of his personality was tied to those instincts.

His protective nature, his drive for perfection, his constant hovering over your safety—was it all because of the bond you now shared, or was it just Kunikida being Kunikida?

“Why are you staring at me?” Kunikida’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts.

“I’m not” you lied, averting your gaze and pretending to admire a nearby display of spiritual talismans.

“Yes, you are,” he said, his tone flat. “If you have something to say, say it.”

“I was just... thinking,” you admitted, not wanting to elaborate. “It’s nothing.”

“You? Thinking? Extremely dangerous” Kunikida gave you a skeptical, yet teasing look, but didn’t press the matter further. Instead, he handed the vendor a neatly tied pouch of coins and picked up the powdered silver, adding it to his bag.

As you moved on to the next stall, you decided to lighten the tension. “So, do you always do the Agency’s shopping, or are you just the only one organized enough to handle it?”

“I volunteered,” he said simply. “Someone has to ensure everything is accounted for and properly acquired. If it were left to Dazai, he’d probably barter our budget away for some ridiculous prank.”

You laughed. “Okay, yeah, that tracks.”

You continued in light conversation, often bickering like a married couple as you worked your way through the list, though the tension between you was noticeably softer than usual. You couldn’t help but enjoy the glimpses of Kunikida’s personality you got to see when he wasn’t being his usual grumpy, rule-bound self.

At one point, you stopped to buy a small bag of what looked like spirit candy, despite Kunikida’s protests that you didn’t have time for frivolous purchases. You popped one in your mouth, savoring the burst of sweetness, and offered one to him.

He hesitated, eyeing the candy suspiciously.

“It’s not poisoned” you said, a genuinely sweet smile at your lips as you rotated the hard candy between your fore and index fingers in front of his face.

“I know its not-” he stopped himself mid sentence, instead of protesting, he takes the piece of candy in defeat and popped it into his mouth. His expression didn’t change, but you could swear you saw the tiniest twitch of approval in his brow, an expression that made your heart flutter ever so slightly.

By the time you finished your errands, the satchel was nearly bursting with supplies, and your feet were beginning to ache from all the walking. But as you made your way back to Kunikida’s dorm, you realized you didn’t mind the exhaustion. You simply enjoyed a domestic outing, and heck, you even enjoyed the fact that this 7ft Oni was by your side, never failing to notice the way he would get closer to you if a Yokai stared at you too long, as if claiming territory.

As much as he grumbled and was a stickler for perfectionism, you had found the trip surprisingly enjoyable - though you would never admit that out loud.

Kunikida, for his part, kept a careful distance as you walked, his thoughts equally conflicted. He told himself it was just the bond compelling him to stay close, but every now and then, he’d glance at you out of the corner of his eye and feel an unfamiliar warmth he couldn’t quite explain.

-

Back at the dorm, you stretched your arms over your head, letting out a content sigh. The shopping trip had been exhausting but rewarding in its own way. Kunikida had placed the items purchased at the stalls on one side of the room, whilst the bags of groceries sat neatly arranged on Kunikida’s kitchen counter; a mix of fresh herbs, dried noodles, and glowing spices you could barely name.

“Not bad” you murmured to yourself, eyeing the neatly organized spread.

“Hands off,” Kunikida warned as he noticed you looking too closely at the ingredients. “I’ll handle dinner. The last thing I need is you setting this place on fire.”

You turned to face him with an incredulous expression. “Excuse me? You think I can’t cook?”

“I know you can’t,” Kunikida replied firmly, crossing his arms. “You don’t exactly strike me as the domestic type.”

“That’s rich, coming from someone who alphabetized his groceries” you shot back with a scoff, hands finding their way on your hips. Kunikida’s eyes linger down for a brief moment to your hips, sucking in some air before looking back to your face.

Kunikida sighed deeply, the kind of sigh that spoke volumes about how much patience he believed he was wasting. “Look, just let me handle it. I have a system.”

“Your system can take a night off,” you countered. “I want to cook for once. You’ve been making every meal since I got here. It’s my turn.”

“No” Kunikida said flatly, his expression leaving no room for argument.

But you weren’t one to back down. “No?” You echoed, raising an eyebrow.

“That’s right. No” Kunikida replied, turning back toward the counter to begin his meal preparations.

You smirked, crossing your arms and leaning against the counter. “Well, too bad. Because I might just order you to sit down and let me cook.”

Kunikida froze, his back stiffening. Slowly, he turned to glare at you. “You wouldn’t.”

“Oh, try me” you said smugly, your grin widening. “Kunikida, I order you to sit down and let me make you dinner”

The bond between you flared to life, a subtle but undeniable tug that made Kunikida’s shoulders sag in defeat. His jaw clenched, and his grip tightened on the ladle he’d been holding, but ultimately, he had no choice. As if his body was robotic, he left the kitchen counter and sat down nearby, like a good Oni.

“Fine” he grunted out, his expression looked akin to a wet cat, pouting and crossing his arms as he looked away from you. “But if you so much as scorch the stove, you’ll regret it.”

“I gotcha” you said breezily, stepping into the kitchen with an extra spring in your step.

As you started pulling ingredients together, Kunikida watched from his seat, his irritation palpable. Yet, as the minutes ticked by, his annoyance began to fade, replaced by a strange sense of… comfort.

You, for all your bluster, looked remarkably at ease in the kitchen. You hummed softly under your breath, occasionally muttering to yourself as you tasted the broth or adjusted the flame. The sight of you moving so naturally in his space - your space - stirred something unfamiliar in him. This isn’t the first time he had experienced such a feeling since you moved in.

He wouldn’t say it out loud, but he found it oddly nice. The kitchen felt warmer with you in it, the quiet hum of domestic activity soothing in a way he hadn’t expected.

“Stop staring” you said without looking up, breaking him from his thoughts.

“I’m not staring” Kunikida snapped, immediately defensive.

“Sure you aren’t,” you said, your tone dripping with sarcasm. “I can feel your eyes burning holes in the back of my head.”

Kunikida scoffed but didn’t bother denying it further. Instead, he kept his arms crossed and muttered something about improper cooking techniques.

After a short while, you placed two bowls of steaming ramen soup on the table, complete with finely sliced scallions, a perfectly boiled egg, and a fragrant broth that smelled surprisingly delicious. It was a simple dish, but something you felt proud of whenever you made it.

“Well?” You said, gesturing for him to dig in. “Moment of truth. Try it.”

Kunikida eyed the bowl suspiciously, as if it might spontaneously explode at any moment. Slowly, he picked up his chopsticks and took a tentative bite.

The flavour immediately hit his tongue, and his eyes widened just a fraction before he quickly masked his reaction. “It’s… passable” he said, though the faint pink dusting his cheeks gave him away.

“Passable?” You echoed, narrowing your eyes. “That’s it? I slaved over a hot stove for you, and all I get is passable?”

“Slaved? A bit dramatic considering you demanded to cook but…” Kunikida cleared his throat, refusing to meet your gaze. “It’s good” he admitted begrudgingly, stabbing at his noodles with his chopsticks. “Happy?”

“Ecstatic” you replied, grinning triumphantly before sucking down some noodles from your chopsticks; always the messy eater.

The two of you ate in relative peace after that, the occasional bickering muted by the quiet satisfaction of a shared meal.

As you finished, you leaned back, a smug look on your face. “See? Told you I could cook.”

Kunikida rolled his eyes but didn’t argue. “Don’t get used to it” he scoffed.

“Oh, I won’t,” you said airily. “Wouldn’t want to infringe on your precious system.”

You locked eyes for a moment, and despite the usual teasing, there was something softer there—a quiet acknowledgment of your growing understanding.

But, true to form, neither of you were willing to admit it.

“Well, I hope you’re ready to clean up your mess” Kunikida said, breaking the moment.

“Excuse me?” you glared at him. “I cooked! You clean!”

“Not a chance,” Kunikida shot back, already gathering his chopsticks.

“Uhhh well okay then. Kunikida, I order you to clean up” you spat with a smirk.

And just like that, Kunikida immediately stood up and began cleaning, cursing to himself as he did. A lot of ‘insolent brat’ and ‘impertinent woman’ coming from the Oni’s lips. Though he did what he was told, and you could only lean against the low table with a satisfied smirk.

He stood at the sink, meticulously scrubbing each bowl and utensil with a focus that was so him, it made you smile. It was strange how easily you had begun to predict his movements, his habits. When he wasn’t talking - especially when he wasn’t cursing you to the heavens, his presence was surprisingly soothing.

You leaned back on your hands, glancing toward the window. Beyond it, the Spirit Realm stretched out in its eternal twilight. The city lights twinkled faintly, a reflection of the mortal Yokohama you knew so well, yet entirely its own world.

Could you see yourself staying here? As much as you missed the sunlight, it had grown on you.

The thought crept in uninvited, and you frowned, wrestling with it. At first, the Spirit Realm had been terrifying. The yokai, the rules, the strange customs - it was overwhelming. But now, after nine days, the chaos was starting to feel… normal.

You thought about the market stalls glowing under the ever-dark sky, the comforting rhythm of life that existed here despite the strange circumstances. You thought about the Armed Detective Agency, their quirks and camaraderie, how they had accepted your presence without much question.

And then, inevitably, you thought about him.

Kunikida’s back was turned to you as he rinsed the last dish. His posture was rigid, his movements precise, but there was an unconscious grace to the way he moved. You hadn’t expected to feel at ease around him, of all people, yet there you were.

You had twenty-one days left until the new moon, when you could return to the mortal realm. Twenty-one days to decide if that’s what you really wanted.

Your family would miss you, of course. That was the undeniable weight tipping the scales. You imagined your parents wondering where you’d gone, your friends growing worried as the days passed without a word.

But here… you felt a strange freedom. There were no expectations to meet, no deadlines to chase, no pressure to be anyone but yourself - on top of that, you didn’t need to pay no bills. It was an intoxicating thought.

Still, you couldn’t imagine giving up the warmth of the sun, the laughter of your loved ones, or the familiarity of your world.

Then again… he was here.

Your gaze drifted back to Kunikida. His brows furrowed slightly as he dried the bowls, and you realized you were smiling. You quickly wiped it away, annoyed at yourself.

Were you really considering staying because of him? The obnoxious perfectionist who couldn’t go two sentences without lecturing you? The one who insisted on sticking to a rigid schedule but still made sure you were safe and comfortable in a world that wasn’t yours?

Your stomach fluttered annoyingly, and you pressed a hand to it as if that would stop the feeling.

Kunikida glanced over his shoulder, catching you staring. “What are you thinking about?” he asked, his voice curious but tinged with that familiar gruffness.

“Nothing” you lied quickly, sitting up straighter.

He raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced, but didn’t push. Turning back to the sink, he muttered, “As long as it’s not any reckless plans to set the kitchen on fire.”

You rolled your eyes, but your smile lingered.

If nothing else, you had twenty-one more days to figure things out. For now, just being here, with him nearby, was enough.

-

After everything was tidied up, it was nearing bedtime. You remained on your side of the curtain, reading some ancient texts about spirits; which even included a brief history of the mating system. About how Alphas and Omegas exist as a partnership, and not something you read from Tumblr back in your teen years.

As the night rolled on, you pulled your blanket around yourself on the spacious futon, sinking into it like a balm to the soul. You had gotten very used to this futon, very quickly. Kunikida had spared no expense in getting the most comfortable futon (and a very large one at that). Though a thought crossed your mind as you peeked through the gap between the curtain that divided the room. Beyond it, Kunikida sat cross-legged on his yoga mat, his eyes closed in meditation.

The sight of him, a towering 7-foot Oni attempting to fold himself into serenity on what was essentially a glorified floor cushion—stirred an uncomfortable pang of guilt in your chest. You tugged the blanket tighter, trying to shake the thought. ‘He’s fine. He chose to sleep there’

But the more you watched him, the harder it was to ignore the situation. Sure, Kunikida could be annoyingly stubborn, insufferably by-the-book, and the very embodiment of a grouchy Alpha, but... he was still a person. Or, well, an Oni. And it couldn’t be pleasant, spending every night on that thin mat just because of you.

“Hey” you called softly, leaning over to peer fully through the curtain.

Kunikida’s eyes opened, sharp and alert, though his expression remained neutral. “What is it?”

You hesitated, then gestured to the large futon. “You should sleep here tonight. The bed’s big enough for both of us. I mean, look at you, you’re practically folded in half over there.”

Kunikida’s brows furrowed in a mix of confusion and indignation. “Absolutely not.”

You sighed, already anticipating his response. “Kunikida-”

“No” he interrupted firmly. “It’s inappropriate. And unnecessary. I’m perfectly fine where I am.”

“You’re not fine,” you shot back. “That mat looks awful. And you’re huge! You probably wake up sore every morning.”

“I said no” he repeated, his tone brooking no argument.

You crossed your arms, a pout on your lips until a devilish thought came into mind. Although you didn’t want to abuse your power, it couldn’t be helped. There was a mischievous glint in your eye as you leaned closer. “Okay. Well, I wasn’t going to do this, but…” you cleared your throat dramatically. “I order you, Kunikida Doppo, to sleep on this bed tonight.”

Kunikida’s jaw visibly clenched, his hazel eyes narrowing as he stiffened. “You can’t-”

“Yes, I can,” you said, cutting him off with a triumphant grin. “I’m your master, remember? You have to listen to me.”

‘Master’ he echoed in his mind.

He glared at you, clearly wrestling with his pride, before letting out a long, slow exhale. “Fine. But we maintain proper distance.”

“Deal” you said, scooting over to the far side of the futon.

With an air of resignation, Kunikida rose to his full height and stepped over to the bed. He moved with his usual precision, pulling back the blanket on the opposite side and lying down stiffly, as if the mere act of sharing the futon with you was a monumental compromise.

You couldn’t help but smile as you lay back down, keeping your promise and staying as far away as possible. Despite his grumbling, there was something weirdly satisfying about his presence nearby.

Minutes passed, the room falling into a quiet stillness, you stared at the ceiling, with your thoughts drifting back to the longing feeling of staying in the spirit realm. The ache in your chest deepened, thinking about family, friend, life in your normal world.

Kunikida sensed your tension, at first thinking it was the fact you were sharing a futon, but when his eyes sleepily opened to see your furrowed brow, he lets out a gentle sigh.

“You are thinking too much. Sleep. Think more tomorrow, though its a wonder that you think at all in that empty head of yours” He spoke, even with an insult, his tone was gentle and dare say kind.

“You’re right. The thinking part. Not the head empty part” you chuckle and laid on your side then, finding the new position comfortable. For a moment you caught this hazel eyes in the darkness, admiring the way they looked so…you couldn’t quite find the words for it, but it was a comfort nonetheless.

After a few minutes, the Oni next to you, tall and lumbering, had fallen asleep, whilst you carried on battling your thoughts. You tried distracting yourself, cricketing your legs under the blanket, rubbing the fabric between your fingers or even just sniffing the futon. It wasn’t until you turned your gaze towards Kunikida, whose face was relaxed in sleep, his golden hair had been set free, and his long locks sprawled out over his pillow. You could tell he was enjoying being back in his bed.

He looked so peaceful, so warm and even vulnerable. You hated to admit it but it was nice just seeing him in this state. No insults, no bickering, just peace.

The thought struck you again, a strange, yearning thought you hadn’t expected before today.

You didn’t want to leave.

You shook your head, turning back to face the ceiling. ‘Get a grip, Y/N. Thirty days. That’s all this is.’

Eventually, your thoughts quieted, and you drifted off to a blissful sleep.

-

Kunikida woke a little while later, his gaze fell on you, who was fast asleep on the other side of the futon. Your breathing was soft and even, your expression free of the worry and fear that so often clouded your features during the day. Except of course today, the way you weaved in and out of the crowd so carefree and happy, it blossomed something within Kunikida.

He let out a quiet sigh, his shoulders relaxing slightly.

There was something unsettlingly right about this. Sharing the same space. Protecting you. It didn’t help that being in such a close proximity to you, he could smell your scent. Although your human scent had faded, another soon came into being; it was your real scent, how you normally smell along with something he could only recognise in Omegas. He edges closer, smelling more of that sweeter tone, intoxicating and inviting. He recalled when he nuzzled against your arm, leaving a trail of kisses along your wrist. He found himself wanting to do it again.

He tried to dismiss the feeling as nothing more than the effects of the spirit bond. He was obligated to keep you safe, to stay close. That was all. It didn’t mean anything.

And yet, as he watched you, a small, quiet part of him, a part he didn’t dare acknowledge - wished it did mean something.

Kunikida shook his head, forcing himself to look away. He closed his eyes, trying to will himself back to sleep. But the image of your peaceful face lingered, and for the first time in a long while, he allowed himself to feel the faintest hint of longing.

• Next Chapter ->

[baizhoobies]

telling them “you won’t be able to walk after i’m done with you”

۶ৎ suggestive (mature content 18+), crack, established rel

۶ৎ kazuha, tartaglia, wriothesley, neuvillette, pantalone, capitano, dottore, alhaitham, baizhu

[baizhoobies]

Pairing: Sigma x reader

Contents: NSFW, sex pollen, hand-job, blow-job, sigma's exemplary panic-managment (he's trying his best okay, he is), Sigma gets affected by a sex pollen and thinks he's perfectly capable of handling it by not handling it, Approx. 3.4k words

Sweat.

Sigma could feel it dripping down his back, his clothes becoming more and more uncomfortable. He stood stock-still, gaze glued to the file you gave him. He could barely read it, the words blending in with every stubborn blink to finally make sense of it. Some time had passed, but he could still hear you speaking, diligent as ever, as you reported on your most recent task.

Sigma was glad for your focus because he doubted he could keep up this front for long. Not when his recovery time was a mere 7.32 minutes. He timed it. He had to.

And then it would start again. 

It didn’t matter what he thought of or how many times he had to swallow down his own mortification– one hand would cover his mouth, the other working fast at unzipping his trousers before he was thrusting viciously in his palm, breaths ragged as muffled against his hold. He barely had time to think anything through, the need setting in sudden and merciless each time. He’s never had a high sexual drive to begin with, so wrapping his hand around his cock, stroking until he all but blanked out from the sensation– that was beginning to take its toll. The fact that he was still at work, glued to his desk, made it all the worse. And to top it all–

Nothing helped.

Which, well… Well. Sigma should have figured as much.

It’s not like he didn’t know how aphrodisiacs worked. 

He had hoped it was something else at first. He really should have focused on his morning paperwork instead of answering your call for assistance on a… problematic guest gathering. The drunkenness and rowdy screams had caused enough noise complaints to rouse the entire floor of the royal suites’ accommodations. Only, it wasn’t just alcohol.

A substance, dark as ink and staining just as easily– Sigma had made the mistake of inspecting one of the many bottles discarded at the scene, only for it to leave blotches on his fingertips, a headache not an hour later and one of the worst instances of arousal he had ever experienced in his life.

Waiting for your report was the only saving thought he could hold onto. And now to hear it, hear you– Sigma could only blink angrily at the sheets before him, mind blank save for the ticking clock by his desk and the need for you to go away go away go away.

Worst of all– you were with him then. Saw and wrote down everything he drew your attention to. Clenching his hand now would hide the marks there, yes, but it would only serve to quell his shame if just a bit. 

There was no point in it when you knew what was there. Your sympathetic gaze made it worse, even if you tried to maintain professionalism as you discussed the finer details of the substance and how the other guests were fairing after their exposure. 

“So far we’re certain the beverages were brought in from our own supply. Mostly wine, but there were quite a few hard liquors. Still no clarity on how the bottles we found were smuggled in, but the good news is that most of the effects are fading the majority of the guests who used it,” you said matter of fact, eyes reading off the tablet in your hands. 

You seemed calm. At least Sigma knew the situation was being handled by capable hands. 

He took a steady breath, jaw clenching as he forced an even voice. “Speak with Background Security about guest identification first. I’ll grant you access to their files and the Safety Feature protocol.” Identifying who the culprits were would be no issue for the Sky Casino. It was more a matter of time than success.

You nodded, handing forward your tablet for the access signature. “I’ll be done by 3 pm. Our suspects are narrowed down to seven individuals. I’ll pull them–”

“No,” Sigma said. His headache was back, making his hand tremble as he drew his pen over the screen. “Pull all of them through.”

You hesitated. “Sir, there were over 40 people on the list. Not counting the associates.” 

“Yes.”

“This will take a lot of time.”

Sigma looked up at you. “I am aware of that. Do it.”

It was an uncomfortable sight; having a coworker narrow their eyes at him, uncertainty written all over their features. This was proving to be far more troublesome than he liked. The Casino relied on him, he could not let his workers’ trust dwindle like this. 

“Sir,” and there was an edge to your voice. A warning, as you pierced his very being with your prodding observation.

Sigma stood up, leaning against his desk for support, just in case. He forced all the confidence he did not feel to seep into his posture. “It’s alright. I’ll wait for your findings.”

You sighed. “You don’t seem alright.”

“There’s nothing to fret over,” Sigma said, mustering a smile. It felt odd on his face.

Sigma’s worry began to rise again the longer you stood there watching him. 

Lower, the sensation of… something blooming anew was slowly ebbing away at his concentration. The thought of you seeing him like this was simply– mortifying. He could feel his trousers beginning to strain again, his cock filling with blood for god knows which time. He swallowed, his Adam’s apple bobbing with the effort.

Sigma kept a neutral face, not moving a muscle.

“Frankly, you look like shit, and I worry. You have three more meetings before the evening. You can’t attend in this state,” you said.

Sigma pursed his lips. “I will be available in time.” He didn’t dare think of the alternative.

You blinked, not fazed at all. “I could call for an adult escort to be brought.”

Sigma’s eyes widened. “Absolutely not,” he said, the words coming out rushed and completely unprepared for that proposition.

“We can be discreet about it. Say she’s a regular guest and remove all records afterwards.” You cocked your head, considering. “Oh, I apologize. Or he. Whichever you prefer, of course.”

Sigma sat slowly on his chair, hand grasped firmly over his mouth as he could only look at you, not fully grasping that you out of everyone would suggest– suggest such a–

He took in a steadying breath. “No?”

“The effects of the aphrodisiac reduce after sex. At least according to the guests we interviewed so far. It was a scent thing, so long as someone’s near. It will be quicker this way… and less uncomfortable,” you said, resting your tablet on the desk. Sigma pulled back, feeling his back hit the chair as you leaned closer. “You look as if you’ve not slept in days and you’re constantly sweating. Sir. I– it’s just an idea, but please consider it. I know how much you care for your work and I don’t want you to worry even more. It might help.”

This… this was a complete mess. Sigma’s body sagged, and he dropped his face in his hands as his elbows rested atop the desk. The idea was absurd. He’d never even think of it, let alone agree. His hope stayed with figuring out more about the substance and who brought it. 

Even if he had to wait for your findings. He will manage. 

He will.

And maybe you’d find access to some type of sedative? Anything to counter it. 

But… he didn’t have the time. 

Sigma looked up at you through splayed fingers, dejection in his eyes. 

“Hey there,” you said.

“Hello.” I hate this.

“It will be alright,” you said, gaze knowing. But then you softened, eyes kind as you said,  “I have great respect for you, sir, and whichever decision you make– it will not change that.”

Sigma felt warm, the heat spreading fast. It was the aphrodisiac's work, he was certain of it. But just for a moment, he wanted to pretend… pretend it was your kindness that reached out and cupped his frail heart. Had his breath hitch. Gave him enough strength to keep on. The Casino was all Sigma had, and he wanted to do the best he could for it. For all of you.

“Well,” you said, drumming a finger on the desk’s surface. 

Sigma followed the movement with his eyes, mind going blank. Your hand was slender, fingers long and moving with an air of elegance the longer he looked. He liked them.

You were waiting for an answer. He couldn’t keep you here longer. Sigma closed his eyes, eyelids heavy with the weight of his failures. “Don’t call anyone. Please.” The thought of having a… a stranger touch him like that. Having to be this close and vulnerable–against his will if he’s honest–no. Such acts were reserved for lovers; someone who cared. He couldn’t use somebody like that, only to discard them later like it all meant nothing. It would feel even worse knowing they’d do the same to him. “I don’t want that.” 

“I understand,” you said, bowing in respect. “Although–”

Sigma wanted to shrivel up and die. “What is it?”

“Why not?”

“You’re asking me why I don’t want to bring a prostitute to our establishment?”

“Yes,” you said, calm as ever. It was driving Sigma mad by the second.

“Please go deal with Background Security,” Sigma said flatly.

“Oh, I apologize,” you said. Still hovering.

As much as it pained him to admit it, Sigma really needed you to leave. Now. Right now. The strain on his trousers was nearing painful, and the dampness from his already smeared precum made every move shoot jolts of sensation down his spine. He could feel his cheeks burning. What a sight he was making; all the more reasons to spare further embarrassment. 

For the both of you. 

Something must have slipped because instead of heading for the door, you took a step closer. “Damn it, I feel bad,” you began. “Just– you look really bad. Puffy.”

Sigma pursed his lips. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome? Sorry. I mean– I wanted to ask, although I’m no expert or with much skill, to be frank, I wouldn’t mind helping. You have a meeting in about an hour, you might make it if it works.”

Sigma just stared. 

It’s not that he didn’t hear your words, it’s just that you did not just say that. Not only was this unprofessional, it was downright unacceptable for this to even cross your mind. He would never take advantage of an employee like that left a bitter taste in his mouth. And yet…

And yet.

Sigma remained still, forcing his every muscle to move, to say something. He could only look on at you, dumbfounded. Maybe it was the shock that–

No. No. 

“I can’t possibly do that to you, it is unacceptable.”

“Oh, not sex, don’t worry,” you corrected. “I could use my hands and it would probably work as well. So technically I’ll be “doing’’, not you. I don’t mind. If you’re comfortable with that?”

…Right. 

Sigma buried his head in his hands. 

He didn’t feel comfortable with anything. Let alone that. He knew you were waiting for an answer, standing patiently before him. Probably looking at him even now. God, how pathetic he must look. He has nothing impressive about him; not much to look at, really. Yet he was the man you should look up to as your employer. The one you could rely on in times of crisis. 

Not the other way around. 

Sigma curled up even further in himself. “I’m so sorry.”

A man like him should never have been put in such a high position. He knew sooner or later you’d all realize. He was not cut out for this, any of it.

A caress, gentle yet firm. Sigma froze, feeling your hand rest on his shoulder. Your thumb moved, the gesture almost calming.

“Sigma-san?” Your voice was close. Had you moved? Sigma wasn’t sure. He didn’t dare raise his head.

“Sigma-san.” 

Firmer this time. The hand trailed to his back, and then another joined, the feeling of being engulfed spreading as you all but draped yourself over his back, your embrace pulling him closer to you as you rested a cheek on the top of his head. 

“What are you doing?” Sigma asked, voice trembling. 

“You looked like you needed it,” you said, squeezing him even closer. “I’m sorry too.”

“What for?”

“If I had dealt with those guests alone you would’ve been okay. I’m sorry it happened like that. But to be honest, I was panicking. Your presence helped a lot,” you said.

“Oh,” was all Sigma could say. 

You stayed like that for some time, your breathing the only sound in the wide open space of Sigma’s office. He tried to relax as best as he could, but the conversation you two had, combined with having a full body pressed so close to his now… You felt his shivers begin to appear, a chill running through his entire body as he desperately fought against it. 

Too close. 

You were too close and Sigma could barely keep it straight. Your skin was cold, pleasant against his and all the more tempting. 

He could just bury his face against your neck, try and collect himself. But he was scared that if he moved, your hand would stop caressing his hair, playing absently with his locks as you rested against him. He wasn’t going to survive this, Sigma knew that. He groaned in exasperation.

You hummed atop his head. “Tell me what to do.”

It wasn’t a request, but not an order either. Just words floating between you as he pieced their meaning together. Somehow, it clicked quicker this time. “This is more than enough. You don’t have–”

“Might as well cross the bridge since we’re at it,” you said, pulling away.

Sigma closed his eyes, dragging in a calming breath. The more he thought of where this was going, the more his confidence dwindled. He hated to admit it, but leaving you lead was the only calming grace he could think of. With heavy eyelids Sigma looked up at you as he uncurled from himself as best he could. “Okay,” he said, short and simple. Easy.

If only it felt like that.

The first wave of shock came when you pulled him up, positioning yourself beside him as Sigma leaned on the desk, eyes blinking and cheeks getting redder and redder. Heat pooled beneath his naval as you tugged his trousers down, concentration written all over your features. The moment Sigma’s cock came free, a cold shiver ran up his back. Keeping as quiet as he could, he waited for your hesitant touch. 

Your hands felt cold against him, but any thought of discomfort flew out the window as the first stroke of your long fingers against his shaft had Sigma clinging to his desk for dear life.

Sigma released a shaking breath, his brows furrowed as you moved your hand, drawing forth his pleasure with every stroke. His tip began leaking again, precum trailing down his shaft. Your fingers reached up, spreading it over his tip even more, drawing a low moan from Sigma’s lips in the process. 

“Oh, this is good?” you asked, using his wetness to draw forth more stimulation. 

“Yes,” Sigma panted, his face blazing bright red. Looking at you now would be the end for him.

He’s masturbated before, of course, but nothing born out of desperation quite as this. Your body felt warm against his, anchoring him in case he lost even more of his balance. Sigma rocked his hips, breath ragged, seeking more of your attention. This was humiliating, yet his body acted on its own, melting underneath you. 

Sigma buried his face against your neck, stifling another moan just in time as you sweezed harder. He didn’t know how much experience you had, but you were taking your time with him, observing and testing out with your movements.

Soon Sigma felt like a mess, and he probably looked like one too. You had nudged his legs wider at some point, nestling in between them as you pushed him back on the desk, his bare ass planted atop the files meant for reading.

And not this. 

The world was spinning, his cock harder than he’d ever been and leaking enough to coat your firm grasp in its sheen. The sound of it too, slick and lewd with your strokes made his insides twist, his Addam’s apple bobbing every time he swallowed back a moan.

Sigma’s eyelids felt heavy so he kept his eyes closed. Having you so close to him was beyond him now. He could feel your hand stroking his cheek, pushing strands of hair over his shoulder or playing with his earlobe, tugging gently.

It was overwhelming– all those sensations coming from everywhere and all at once. He wondered if you’d kiss him. You haven’t yet. The longer this stretched the more his mind wandered– to your warm breath against his cheek, lips parting as you explored his tongue with yours. He wanted…

“Hey,” you said, smiling at him.

“Hey,” he could only answer, seeking more of your touch. The muscles in his lower belly quivered, Sigma’s breath hitching as the pressure was building more and more.

“You’re okay, right? It’s good?” you asked–

–and Sigma had to open his eyes then, show you what you’re doing to him when he was certain his words would fail him.

But he wasn’t met with your gaze. No, you were looking down, almost transfixed by the way his skin moved as you dragged it up and down his shaft. You had used some of your saliva earlier to ease the movement, sending Sigma in an even bigger spiral. The sight was engraved in his mind for all eternity.

“That’s a stupid question,” he breathed, swallowing hard.

A thoughtful, “hmm…”  was all you gave him, and you tilted your head, an idea springing to mind.  “Actually–”

Words cut by the sudden shrill of the desk phone ringing, freezing you both in place as the melody engulfed you.

Fuck. “Oh, no.” 

You peeked over Sigma’s shoulder. “Told you there’s no time. Meeting’s manager?”

“Yes,” Sigma said, sight growing foggy again as your thumb moved over his leaking slit, forcing a shiver out of him. “No, wait– I…”

“Don’t send to voicemail, but don’t pick up either. Just– give me a moment.”

This was the second shock Sigma experienced. Barely having time to react, to blink away the confusion of your words before you knelt down, lowering your head and–

A low guttural moan escaped Sigma’s lips, head thrown back as you took his length into your mouth. The phone was still ringing, distant to Sigma’s ears.. The only thing in focus was your tongue licking down the length of his dick before drawing back to swirl around his tip. 

Again and again and again.

You bobbed your head, the movement fast and precise. Sigma’s abdomen began to twitch and he had to grab onto his mouth to stifle the string of moans that threatened to slip any second. He didn’t expect you to do this, you weren’t supposed to– 

Your hand grabbed onto his thigh for support, your nails digging into his flesh. Sigma hissed, feeling his eyes water, and he knew he was near. He could  feel it rising and rising faster than he could articulate. 

“Wa–” 

Not even paying attention to him, you tongued his slit before letting Sigma’s cock bottom out in your throat, your little hums of encouragement pushing, until– 

Sigma tipped over the edge in seconds, barely having time to warn you as his load shot down your throat. He was a mess, trembling all over and he could only look down at you in shock, blinking his long lashes stupidly as you brushed the saliva trailing down your chin. The sight of it still– you between his legs, his cock still in your hand as it slowly became flaccid. Even seeing it, comprehending what happened, was another story in itself.

“Come on,” you said, pulling his underwear up. “Guess we made it in time.”

It took a second before Sigma realized, before he heard the phone still ringing.  

He groaned, running a hand through his face. “That’s why?”

“We still have work to do,” you said, and you slowly stretched up. 

“Yeah.” And a small little tug formed in Sigma’s chest. One that wanted a bit more time. Just…

His hand reached, picking up the phone. “Hello? Yes, I’ll be…”

You looked at him then, shaking your head in amusement. It was a comfort, in a way; knowing you’re still on good terms as you poked him in the cheek before patiently sitting on his chair to wait out his call.

After all, you had quite a bit to discuss after this.

[baizhoobies]

Aftercare for A

contains: aftercare with Sukuna, him calling you "woman" and "mortal" and "good girl", fem!reader

"Damn woman," Sukuna said in a gruff voice as he ran a hand through his pink hair, which was damp with sweat, "a cunt that can take two cocks..."

His dark red eyes flickered over your body that was exempt from exhaustion. Sweat glistened on your skin, your eyes glazed over as your body sunk into the bed that was adorned with luxurious furs and silks.

Your whole body ached, your eyes still seeing little blurry stars from the pure ecstasy this curse inflicted on you.

He had fucked you relentlessly, until you lay limp, unconscious from the overstimulation his two fat cocks caused.

You couldn't even lift your head to look at him, to see the sly smirk on his face as his eyes mocked you.

"My little mortal..." he purrs, his fingertips gliding up your skin at the hip, "so submissive for me, hm?"

You didn't have the energy to respond as his hand groped your breast, squeezing it under his palm.

"Are you? Are you submissive for me, woman?" He sneered, demanding in answer. Your eyes narrowed and you managed a nod.

"Yes, my lord," you croak out, "f-for you..."

A grin creeped onto his face again and he suddenly wrapped two of his arms around your waist, hoisting you up onto his body. Your head rested on his chest and you let out a soft sigh, closing your eyes.

His hands roamed your bare body as you simply lay on him. Sukuna squeezed the flesh of your ass under his palms, he pinched your nipples, and he ran his fingers through your hair.

"good girl," he whispered into your hair, "your such a good girl, yeah." his lips met your forehead, kissing it softly despite his previous rough manner.

"so sweet, so warm, so tight," his grip on your ass tightened and you winced, a small grunt escaping you lips, "so fucking tight for me- my two cocks," another kiss to your forehead.

You then lift your head to look up at him from his chest. You saw the grin on his face and felt a familiar heat in your lower stomach.

Yeah, he was really hot.

"mm, you like my cocks don't you, woman?" He snickered and you nodded quickly.

"yes, my lord, I love it- love them," you stumble desperately and his grin widens until he looked manic.

Sukuna then grabbed your hips, pulling you up slightly as he crashed his lips roughly onto yours-- delving his tongue into your mouth.

You barely had time to react as one of his hands placed itself on the back of your head, holding your head in place as he practically devoured your face.

"mm.." He moaned into your mouth before pulling away, licking his lips with a smirk, "taste like fucking candy-" he growled and you reeled from the kiss.

Sukuna then wiped your lower lip from the saliva, "so does your cunt," he chuckled and your face flushed slightly.

You stared into his eyes for a moment and both of you fell quiet. Both of your gazes were intimate and he pressed his head forward again, placing a gentle kiss on your lips.

"get some rest, mortal," Sukuna hums, "I want to go again soon," he says and you groan, you could already feel the ache in your back.

please do not copy or repost on any platform without my permission

LIKES AND REBLOGS ARE APPRECIATED

[baizhoobies]

Having to go through all of my stories/HCs at least 4 or 5 times. UGH. For those of you who don’t know my writing process for ‘x reader’ stories, I struggle to write “you” or “your” because for whatever reason it feels unnatural to write. (I blame the autism)

So I start off writing each piece including my OC in the story, using “her” and “she” - then I go over the whole thing and replace it with you, your, Y/N etc.

But I’ve noticed I’ve gotten sloppy with replacing words, so I’m sorry for any confusion in my works if you ever see any inconsistencies.

It’s a stupid writing process that somehow makes writing easier. but dyslexia be damned, I will miss things, even after proof reading.

[baizhoobies]

𝐎𝐧𝐢 𝐃𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐀𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐲…?

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟒

Synopsis: f!Reader somehow finds herself trapped in the spirit realm. Whoops. She entrusts the help of a Yokai Detective Agency to get her back to the mortal realm where she belongs. Wait? A detective agency? In the spirit realm? And the only way of escape is to work with a disgruntled and hot headed Oni who is somehow spiritually bound to her? Sheesh.

A multichapter, Kamisama Kiss inspired story with your favourite Bungo man. Or at least, my favourite~

Warnings: 18+, eventual smut, violence, swearing, blood mention, monsterfucking, knotting, ruts, omegaverse vibes, breeding

A/N: SURPRISE! 2 chapters in 1 evening? Can you believe it?! Well I can because I made the mistake of writing 2 chapters at once and then falling ill. But we move! This chapter is a bit dialogue and exposition heavy, but hopefully it’ll give you a chuckle because I sure did - though I tend to laugh at my jokes even when they aren’t funny. I know I have said omegaverse vibes…welllllllllll less so vibes and more so actually, omegaverse; but my own version! Anywho, enjoy this little treat!

Chapter Warnings: suggestive(?), swearing, Dazai is his own warning.

Masterlist

Despite waking up naturally, you groaned softly as your eyes flicker open, your body sore and mind groggy from the previous day’s mission. ‘I’m still here’ you think to yourself, expecting this whole thing to have been some elaborate dream, or maybe a hallucination from hitting your head after falling down the well. But you were still here.

You blinked into the dim light, expecting to see sunlight filtering through a window. Instead, your eyes were met with the inky darkness of the Spirit Realm. For a moment, you wondered if you had woken up in the middle of the night. But the glowing analogue clock on the bed side table read 7:00 AM.

“Huh? Its still dark?” You mumbled, pushing yourself upright. Your muscles ached in protest, a sharp reminder of how little rest you had since falling into this bizarre realm.

The rich aroma of grilled fish and warm soup drifted through the room, making your stomach growl. Pulling up and onto your feet, you peered past the curtain dividing the room to see Kunikida seated at a low table, arranging an immaculate Japanese breakfast. He moved with practiced efficiency, his hands placing each dish with a precision that seemed more ritual than necessity.

For a man so perpetually tense, Kunikida looked calm in this moment—focused, almost serene. You couldn’t help but watch him for a second longer than you meant to. Seeing Kunikida acting so naturally in his dorm was oddly… domestic.

Without further ado, you shuffled into the room, dragging the blanket behind you. “You’re up early,” you spoke, your voice still scratchy with sleep.

Kunikida didn’t look up. “It’s not early. It’s merely morning.”

“Looks like nighttime to me.” You gestured vaguely at the window. “Still dark as a horror movie out there.”

“The Spirit Realm doesn’t follow mortal day-night cycles,” he said, straightening his glasses. “The sky here remains in a perpetual state of night. Time still passes as usual, but you’ll have to rely on clocks.”

At this, you made a face. “So, no sunrise? No morning sunshine? Just… eternal gloom?”

Kunikida shoots you an exasperated look. “I would’ve assumed that was obvious by now.”

“Geez, someone woke up on the wrong side of the curtain this morning,” you muttered, plopping down on the floor across from him. “Anyway, this smells amazing. Didn’t know you were hiding MasterChef skills under all that…uh…you.”

Kunikida’s posture stiffened slightly, though he kept his attention on the tray. “Cooking is a basic necessity,” he said. “A proper breakfast is essential for maintaining physical and mental efficiency.”

“Uh-huh,” you said, smirking. “So you do this every morning?”

“Yes. And you should eat. A few days eating our food will better disguise the smell of human on you” he spoke pragmatically, though something in his subconscious feels disappointed that you will lose that potency. He shrugs it off.

You didn’t need to be told twice as you reached forward to pick up a pair of chopsticks and took a bite of the grilled fish. It had to be the tastiest thing you’ve ever eaten in your life. Could it be the magic of the spirit realm? Who can tell? But either way it was good fucking food. You let out an involuntary moan of appreciation, something that perked Kunikida’s ears up. “Okay, wow. This is seriously good.”

The Oni gave a small nod of acknowledgment, though his posture remained stiff and formal. Whilst you dined, you couldn’t help but notice how carefully he ate, each bite deliberate, as if following a silent set of rules. By contrast, you devoured your meal with the enthusiasm of someone who hadn’t eaten a proper meal in days.

Another few moments of silence goes by, other than the subtle noises of chopsticks hitting the bowl or chewing. Kunikida’s gaze was on you at all times, and whenever you looked up, he looks away. He couldn’t stop himself, his sharp senses picked up the changes in your scent: the faint trace of his scent lingering on your skin from where he had nuzzled and kissed you. The knowledge that he had left some sort of mark on you filled him with a strange, conflicting satisfaction. He told himself it was purely pragmatic—ensuring your safety in a hostile realm.

But a deeper, more instinctive part of him felt possessive. ‘Look at her, she’s mine’ the thought whispered, unbidden. The idea sent a ripple of discomfort through him, and he focused on finishing his meal in silence.

After a while, you broke the silence. “So,” you said, setting your chopsticks down politely. “What is the plan today, gunna fight anymore Yokai? Prevent a world ending evil scheme?.”

Kunikida stilled, his gaze flickering up to meet yours. “Paperwork”

“What?”

Kunikida adjusted his glasses, his expression unreadable. “Reports need to be written, filed and analysed. Some cases link to other, larger cases. Our job is to both report and investigate, to either close a case or to prevent further crimes being committed”

“Ah I see, so usual detective stuff then, I get it.” You reflect for a few moments, its not like you go out, beat some bad guys and just walk away like in a video game, it seems the spirit world is (unfortunately) much like the mortal realm in terms of responsibility. Paperwork is dull, but as an adult, you can understand and appreciate the amount of work goes into such an organisation.

-

The morning at the Armed Detective Agency was uneventful. Kunikida buried himself in paperwork, his pen moving with almost mechanical precision as he filled out forms and wrote reports. You sat nearby at Dazai’s desk which faced opposite to Kunikida, propping your chin on a hand as you watched him work. As boring as it may be, especially without much conversation, he had a certain elegance to him. Despite being an Oni, with some Oni features, he was good at his office job, or it seemed like it. You almost found yourself liking the sight of this powerful, supernatural being just…doing some paperwork; and quite passionately too.

“You’re really into this whole organization thing, huh?” You asked after a while of gazing.

“It’s called being efficient.” he replied without looking up.

“More like being a control freak.”

He didn’t dignify that with a response, and you smirked. “Do you ever just… scribble? You know, like a normal person?”

“Scribbling wastes resources.” he said flatly.

“You’re a waste of resources” you shot back.

Kunikida sighed heavily. “Do you ever stop talking?”

“Not if I can help it.”

Their little bickering was interrupted by Dazai, who strolled in with his usual shit eating grin. “Ah, the happy couple hard at work” he said, plopping down on the edge of Kunikida’s desk.

“Dazai,” Kunikida said, his voice low and irritated, “if you’re here to waste time—”

“Relax, Kunikida,” Dazai said, waving a hand dismissively. “I’m just here to check on our lovely guest. Soooo Y/N, how’s life with Mr. Rules and Regulations?”

“Eh” you said with a grin. “Not as bad as I thought. Except for the whole being an ass and boring perfectionism thing.”

“I’m not boring” Kunikida said stiffly, choosing to downright ignore the ass comment.

“Sure you’re not,” Dazai said with a wink. “Anyway, do try to keep things interesting, won’t you? I’d hate for Y/N to die of boredom before we get her back to the mortal realm.”

The banter continued, you and Dazai found a kinship in teaming up to tease Kunikida until even he couldn’t entirely hide the faintest twitch of a smile. However, when Dazai disappeared, the silence returned and so did the entertainment.

You took it upon yourself to pace through the labyrinthine halls of the Armed Detective Agency, trying to distract yourself from the lingering awkwardness of just sitting near Kunikida.

“Gotta find something to do,” you muttered, turning a corner. “Anything. Before I lose my mind.”

Your wandering eventually led you to the medical bay, where you find Yosano organizing vials of glowing herbs and neatly stacked charms. The doctor’s horns gleamed faintly in the dim light, curling back from her head like polished obsidian. She glanced up as you entered, her sharp eyes softening slightly.

“Bored already?” Yosano asked with a knowing smile.

“You have no idea,” you replied with a groan, flopping onto one of the examination beds. “Kunikida’s obsessed with his paperwork, everyone else has these cool powers, and I’m just… here. Being the token mortal.”

Yosano chuckled, leaning against the counter. “Well, you’ve got a unique situation. Most humans don’t last long in the Spirit Realm”

“Guess I’m special” you muttered.

“More than you realize,” Yosano said, tilting her head. “You’re managing to keep up in a world where humans are usually prey. That’s no small feat.”

You gave her a wry look. “Thanks, but it’s not like I’m doing anything. I just follow Kunikida around and try not to get eaten.”

Yosano smirked. “Give it time. You’ll find your place here.”

You hesitated, feeling everything at once build up within you until you couldn’t stop yourself from blurting out “What’s Kunikida’s deal, anyway? He’s so… uptight. I get that he’s trying to protect me or whatever, but does he ever, like, relax?”

Yosano stops her organising and sits in a chair opposite to you, her expression turned thoughtful. “Kunikida’s ideals are everything to him. They’re what keep him grounded in a world that’s inherently chaotic. He believes in rules, structure, and personal perfection because it’s his way of bringing order to the chaos.”

You frown at this. “So he’s a control freak because the Spirit Realm’s a mess?”

“More like he’s trying to be a beacon of order in a realm where rules are often… fluid,” Yosano explained. “But it’s not just the Spirit Realm. Kunikida’s seen what happens when Yokai lose sight of their ideals. For him, failure isn’t an option.”

You mulled this over, a faint pang of sympathy tugging within you. “That sounds… exhausting.”

“It is,” Yosano said with a small smile. “But it’s also what makes him dependable. He’s the kind of person who will go to any lengths to protect what matters to him.”

Before you could respond, Dazai’s voice drifted in from the doorway. “Ah, discussing Kunikida, are we? Always a fascinating topic.”

You turn to see Dazai leaning casually against the doorframe, his horns glinting like polished amber in the low light. His honeyed eyes sparkled with mischief as he sauntered into the room.

“Don’t you have anything better to do, Dazai?” Yosano asked dryly.

“Absolutely not,” he replied cheerfully, plopping into a nearby chair. “But since you’re talking about our dear Kunikida, I simply must bring up his notebook.”

You raised an eyebrow, you know about what his notebook can do but…something tells you there is a little more to the story. “What about the notebook?”

“Oh, yes,” Dazai said, grinning wickedly. “Kunikida’s sacred book of ideals. He carries it everywhere and treats it like it holds the secrets of the universe.”

“Because it does, in his mind” Yosano added with a smirk.

“More importantly,” Dazai continued, “it contains the infamous 57 rules of an ideal woman.”

Your jaw dropped. “You’re kidding.” 57? You could just about fit all your ideals about a partner on one hand. The bar was, unfortunately, quite low.

“Not at all,” Dazai said, his grin widening. “Rule one—”

“Stop,” you interrupt, holding up a hand. “This can’t be real. He has an actual checklist?”

“Of course he does,” Yosano said, laughing softly. “Kunikida approaches everything in life with the same level of intensity. Why would his love life be any different?”

You groaned, burying your face in your hands. “That’s insane. Who has time for that?!”

“Clearly, Kunikida does,” Dazai said, his voice laced with amusement. “But who knows? Perhaps you’ll surprise him.”

“Not likely,” you protest. “First of all, I’m probably the exact opposite of his perfect woman, and second of all, no. Just…no”

“Maybe so,” Dazai said, his tone playful. “But opposites do attract, don’t they?”

A scoff leaves your mouth as you look away from the pair, how utterly ridiculous, though you couldn’t help the faint smile tugging at your lips.

The three of you continued to talk about Kunikida for a long while, finding out little bits of information from his friends about what he is like as a person, and by the sounds of it, Kunikida is a man who wears his heart on his sleeve - though not quite a heart, but what you see is what you get.

From one conversation topic to another, the weight of your situation crept back into your mind. You glance out the nearby window, gazing at the perpetual darkness that cloaked the Spirit Realm with spiralling, ominous clouds that filled the endless sky. The faint glimmer of stars poking through the tufts gave the world an eerie but oddly beautiful glow.

“It’s so weird,” you murmured, your voice softer now. “It’s always nighttime here. Doesn’t that… bother you guys?”

Yosano followed your gaze to the window, her expression thoughtful. “Not really. For us, this is normal. The Spirit Realm has its own rhythm—its own kind of time.”

Dazai leaned back in his chair, lacing his fingers behind his head. “The perpetual night can be a little monotonous if you’re used to the mortal realm, but there’s a charm to it, don’t you think? The way the shadows dance, the way the stars never waver. It’s like living in a painting.”

You chuckle dryly. “Yeah, well, I’m a mortal. I need sunlight. I miss the warmth of it, the way it feels on my skin… I’ll miss watching the sunrise with a cup of coffee in the morning.” Your voice faltered, and your gaze dropped to your hands. “I think… I’ll miss a lot of things.”

Yosano noticed the shift in your tone and leaned forward, her sharp eyes softening. “Like what?”

“My family,” you admit quietly, your fingers fidget with the hem of your sleeve. “They’re probably wondering where I am—or worse, they think I’m dead. I didn’t exactly leave a note saying, ‘Hey, fell down a well into the Spirit Realm, be back in 30 days.’”

Dazai sat up straighter, for a brief moment, his usual playfulness was replaced by something more measured, more sincere.

“Your family won’t think you’re gone,” he said gently, patting a hand on your shoulder. “Time doesn’t work the same way here as it does in the mortal realm.”

You look up at him, a flicker of hope breaking through your worry. “What do you mean?”

“Think of the Spirit Realm as… outside of time,” Dazai explained, his voice unusually steady. “While you’re here, only a fraction of that time will pass in the mortal world. When the 30 days are up and we send you back, it’ll be as if almost no time has passed at all.”

“Really?”

Yosano nodded. “It’s true. It’s one of the few rules of the Spirit Realm that actually works in a human’s favor. Your family won’t even notice you’re gone.”

You let out a shaky sigh, relief washing over you. “That’s… good. That’s really good.” You paused, fingers still gripping your sleeve. “But what happens if I don’t survive the 30 days?”

Dazai’s hand paused and remained steady on your shoulder. “You will survive,” he said with surprising firmness. “We’ve got your back. Kunikida may act like he’s all business, but he’s already committed to keeping you safe. And the rest of us? We’re not about to let a mortal fall on our watch.”

You blink, and then blink again, caught off guard by his conviction. “Thanks” you murmured.

“Of course,” Dazai said, his grin returning, though it was softer now. “We’re the Armed Detective Agency. Protecting the helpless is kind of our thing—even if the helpless is a stubborn human who bickers with her assigned Oni every five minutes.”

You scoff. “I’m not that bad.”

Yosano smirked. “You are, but it’s kind of endearing.”

You rolled your eyes but couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at your lips. “Great. I’m the human equivalent of a stray cat you guys took in.”

“A very loud and feisty stray” Dazai added, earning himself a playful shove from Yosano.

As your conversation carried on, the faint sound of soft footsteps echoed in the hall outside the medical bay. A moment later, a slender Oni woman appeared in the doorway, carrying a tray of steaming teacups. Her curved horns were delicate and unassuming, barely more than sharp accents above her pointed ears. She wore a serene smile that lit up her softly glowing eyes.

“Good morning,” the Oni greeted, her voice light and melodic. “I thought you all might like some tea.”

“Oh, Ayumi, my belladonna! You’re an angel!” Dazai said, his grin widening as he eagerly reached for a cup.

“Hardly an angel, but thank you,” Ayumi said with a quiet laugh, setting the tray on a nearby counter. “You can quit with the belladonna stuff though”

“Ah but sweet thing, I will quit when I quit this life in an act of passion, please do bid me the honour of committing double sui-”

Dazai’s words are cut off but Yosano pushing Dazai face down onto the table and leaning on his back with her elbow. You gave a puzzled look at Dazai, wondering what he was going to say, or what he meant. But its Dazai, of all people, so you chose to ignore the subject completely.

Yosano grabbed her own cup, leaning casually against Dazai’s squirming body. “Always on top of things, Ayumi. How’s the chaos in Admin today?”

“Organized as always,” Ayumi replied, brushing a lock of hair from her face. She inclined her head towards you. “You must be the human everyone’s talking about. I hope the Spirit Realm hasn’t been too overwhelming.”

“It’s been… a lot,” you admitted with a small smile. “But everyone’s been helpful. Thanks for the tea.”

Ayumi nodded graciously before taking the empty tray and excusing herself. As she turned to leave, your eyes caught something curious: a faint scar-like mark on the nape of Ayumi’s neck. It was distinct and deliberate, shaped like a bite.

The door closed behind Ayumi, and Wanda turned back to Yosano, who had since lifted her elbow away from Dazai’s back to sip on her tea. “Uh, not to be nosy, but… did anyone else notice that bite mark on her neck?”

Dazai, with a glowing red print on his forehead smirked over his teacup but stayed silent, letting Yosano take the lead.

Yosano raised an eyebrow and set her tea down. “You mean the mating mark?”

“Mating mark?” You repeated, blinking.

“It’s a ritual thing, kinda like human marriage” Yosano explained, crossing her arms. “In the Spirit Realm, everyone falls into one of three categories: Alpha, Omega, or Beta. It doesn’t matter what species you are, Oni or otherwise”

You frown, good lord you’ve been reading one too many fan fictions to know what that could mean. “So uh, how does that work?”

Yosano gives a thorough explanation, in short, each being has one of those categories, though it is slightly different to what you had initially thought. Its not about hierarchy or power or anything like that, its just simply who you are mated to, and who carries the children. Alphas can’t get pregnant, Omegas can, and Beta’s can be either. The doctor proceeded to reveal that she herself was an Alpha, whereas Dazai was just a beta, though you were rather thankful they didn’t divulge in whether he could get pregnant or not.

“So… Ayumi’s a mated omega?” You sit there, trying to put two and two together.

Yosano nodded. “To a Beta, actually. Not every pairing has to be Alpha-Omega, but once the mark is there, the bond is for life”

Wanda sat back, processing this new information. “Right well, I think I’ll stick to the classic golden rings. I mean, Alphas? Omegas? What next? Dead doves you shouldn’t eat?”

“Huh?” Yosano blinked, tilting her head to the side. You dismiss it, too complicated to explain fandom terms to creatures who probably knew nothing about the sort.

“Oh, speaking of Alphas~” Dazai said, his voice far too casual to be innocent, “our dear Kunikida is an Alpha, if you hadn’t guessed.”

You nearly choked on your tea, eyes widening as you stared at him. Although this whole category was slightly different than what fanfiction taught you, it was still an extremely odd thing to hear. “Wait, what?”

Yosano chuckled, clearly enjoying your reaction. “Doesn’t surprise me. Kunikida practically radiates Alpha energy. The man’s a walking idealist with a protective streak a mile wide.”

You spluttered. “That explains… so much.”

“Doesn’t it?” Dazai said, his grin turning downright wicked. “You should ask him about his instincts sometime. See if he squirms.”

“Absolutely not” you shot back, ignoring the fact that your face is starting to heat up.

But as the laughter died down and the conversation shifted, you couldn’t help but wonder. If Kunikida was an Alpha, what would that make you? You didn’t feel particularly Alpha-like, and you weren’t sure what being an Omega felt like. The entire concept was too close to the stories you had read, so maybe a lot of your feelings were lost in presumptions. Maybe you’d be a Beta? Perfectly average and in-between. ‘Yeah, I’ll go with that. Average, finally, something I am average in’.

Still, the thought of Kunikida being an Alpha gnawed at you, sending a ripple of something she didn’t quite understand through your chest and down your body. It was equal parts annoyance and… something else you didn’t want to think about. As you returned to the desk, Kunikida didn’t bother to look up at you, though he acknowledged your existence by the way he gripped his pen tighter as he wrote in his notebook; a subtle shift you paid great attention to. And that notebook, the same damn one with that checklist of an ideal woman.

Considering what you had learnt, it was no surprise an Alpha would have a checklist for an ideal partner, they mate for life. Even if its a little excessive, you want to at least be compatible with your partner, and as Kunikida is a perfectionist, will except perfection. The thought somehow disappoints you.

‘How on earth am I supposed to look at him the same way?! He’s so…’ you stopped yourself from your ridiculous and lascivious line of thinking. ‘Don’t, don’t go there Y/N’

At least, not for now.

• Next chapter ->

[baizhoobies]

𝐎𝐧𝐢 𝐃𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐀𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐲…?

𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝟑

Synopsis: f!Reader somehow finds herself trapped in the spirit realm. Whoops. She entrusts the help of a Yokai Detective Agency to get her back to the mortal realm where she belongs. Wait? A detective agency? In the spirit realm? And the only way of escape is to work with a disgruntled and hot headed Oni who is somehow spiritually bound to her? Sheesh.

A multichapter, Kamisama Kiss inspired story with your favourite Bungo man. Or at least, my favourite ~

Warnings: 18+, eventual smut, violence, swearing, blood mention, monsterfucking, knotting, ruts, omegaverse vibes, breeding

A/N: Chapter 3 baybee! A bit of action, a bit of attraction, and usual tsundere shenanigans

Chapter Warnings: violence, swearing, enemies to lovers, Kunikida is dramatic and grumpy as usual, scent kink??

Masterlist

The day was already off to a disastrous start.

Kunikida was pacing furiously in the Armed Detective Agency’s main office, every step was punctuated by an annoyed mutter, his expression a storm cloud of simmering frustration. You stood awkwardly nearby, arms crossed, your own expression equal parts defiant and exhausted. It had been a long day as it was, barely a couple of hours into the spirit realm and you had felt zapped; however, there was work that still needed to be done.

“So, let me get this straight,” you finally spoke, your tone laden with sarcasm. “You’re dragging me out into Yokai-infested woods because you get a magical tummy ache if I’m too far away?”

“It’s not a ‘tummy ache,’” Kunikida snapped, still pacing. “It’s a physical manifestation of the soul-binding contract’s restrictions. The pain is debilitating. It’s serious.”

Dazai lounged on the sofa nearby, watching the scene unfold with undisguised amusement. “It’s cute, really. Like a dog who can’t leave his owner.”

“I am not a dog!” Kunikida barked, then immediately turned to you. “And I wouldn’t have to ‘drag’ you anywhere if you weren’t such a liability!”

What an ass. You think he had called you a ‘liability’ among other words several times over, that if you had a nickel for every time he made a rude comment about you, you’d be able to buy the entire city of Yokohama three times over. You rolled your eyes. “Oh, please. As if I asked for any of this? Oooh yeah this is the time of my life, falling into a world that isn’t my own and binding myself to the spirit realm’s most powerful and amazing Oni. Yeah, this is my idea of fun.”

Kunikida glared at you for a few moments to think up a retort. He had those familiar words in his mind to throw at you, but instead blurting out something just as helpful. “You could at least make an effort to stay out of trouble”

“Oh what a snore, you two,” Ranpo interjected, lazily waving a hand. “Don’t you have a mission to get to? If you don’t stick to Kunikida’s schedule I think he might burst a blood vessel”

“Hm, I don’t know, I quite enjoy watching this lovers quarrel” Dazai adds from the couch, a foxlike smile on his face. Even the pattern of the tattoos on his face make his smile ever more apparent.

“We are not lovers!” The both of you shouted in unison, a deep flush glowing on your cheeks.

Ranpo was correct though, Kunikida checked his watch and lets out a defeated sigh. As much as you had kept him behind schedule, he could at least swallow some pride and try to get it back on track.

-

It wasn’t long before you were deep in the forest, the air thick with the eerie energy of the spirit realm. The winding paths were lined with ancient trees whose twisting branches seemed to whisper secrets in the wind. You had followed closely behind Kunikida, who insisted on keeping you within arm’s reach at all times. Dazai trailed a few paces back, whistling a jaunty tune.

“Stay close,” Kunikida said over his shoulder for the third time in five minutes. “If we get separated, I won’t be able to protect you.”

“Yeah, yeah, I get it,” you muttered. “Don’t wander, don’t breathe too loudly, and definitely don’t make any snarky comments that might distract the great Oni Kunikida.”

He glares at you briefly. “If you truly understand, then why do you keep pushing my limits?”

“I’m not pushing anything,” you said innocently. “This is just my natural charm.”

Kunikida muttered something under his breath that sounded suspiciously like “infuriating woman,” but you couldn’t help the smirk tugging at your lips. If he wanted to treat you like a burden, fine, but you made sure to be the most annoying burden possible.

You eventually reached a clearing, the faint sound of Tanuki whimpers and cries drawing their attention to a large wooden cage near the center. A group of Yokai surrounded it, their monstrous features twisted with cruelty. You could feel your stomach turn as your eyes adjusted to the darkness and could faintly see the cowering Tanuki, their fluffy tails curled protectively around them.

“Poor little guys” you whispered.

“They’re not the only ones in danger,” Kunikida said, his tone grim. “The moment they sense you, they’ll come for you first.”

“Great. So, I’m bait now?”

“Not bait. A liability.” Theres that word again. He straightened his back, his jaw clenched. “Stay right here, and for once in your life, do as you’re told.”

“Not a chance,” you muttered, waving a hand dismissively, but Kunikida had already stepped forward. It took a moment or two to register he had gone and crouched behind a tree, spying on the Yokai camp. So, as to not be a liability, you did the sensible thing and joined him right behind the tree.

Kunikida looked over his shoulder angrily, as to scold you, but his lecture was interrupted by Dazai whistling softly as he took in the scene.

“Looks like there are about six of them. Think you can handle that, Kunikida? Or will your little contract buddy here be too much of a distraction?”

“I can handle it,” Kunikida growled. “Stay out of it unless I need backup.”

As much as their hiding skills were top notch, it didn’t take long for the Yokai to sniff the air, smelling something absolutely flavoursome; you. One of the Yokai, a hulking figure with glowing red eyes and antlers, sniffed the air once more and grinned.

“A human,” the Yokai rumbled, his voice guttural and dripping with malice. “And such a delicious-smelling one.”

You could feel that same sinking feeling in your stomach as his gaze settled on the tree where your group had been hiding. ‘Wonderful’, you thought, maybe you were actually a liability as Kunikida had said you were. Feeling a combination of guilt and fear, you instinctively moved closer to Kunikida, even though you hated admitting it, you felt safer near him.

“Great, we’ve been spotted” Kunikida whispered under his breath, he pulled out a gun and peered out behind the tree so that the Yokai could see that he was armed. “Back off,” Kunikida warned, his voice low and dangerous. “Free the Tanuki or we will have no choice but to detain every last one of you”

“Oh yeah? You really think you’re going to stop us, Oni?” the Yokai sneered. “Though, we could make a deal, hm? You hand over that scrumptious human, and we will free the Tanuki, a Yokai’s promise”

Kunikida didn’t bother responding, even if he did hand you over, they would never actually release the poor creatures. Plus, if you die, so does he.

The Oni fires a warning shot at the Yokai’s feet. “Come any closer and you’ll be leaving here in body bags”. This of course did not sway any of the Yokai, enraged, they sprinted forward with impressive speed.

Kunikida and Dazai assumed the defensive position, having you right behind them. At this point, you had felt totally useless in this fight, determined to help, you look around for anything to pick up and throw at the charging Yokai. As you bent over, Kunikida tripped over your form, accidentally shooting his gun in quick succession, hitting one of the Oni’s shoulders.

He didn’t have much time to process what had happened, but once again, you were proving to be more of a pain in his ass than he originally anticipated.

“You idiot! Watch what you are doi-”

“Look out!” You interrupted his scolding by throwing a large rock at one Yokai’s face who was in stabbing distance of Kunikida, making it step backwards. (Not necessarily because of the rock itself, but more because of the dirt and grit getting in its eyes).

As much as he was grateful, Kunikida did not have chance to thank you for the distraction, he had picked you up, hooking and arm around your waist and flinging you to a nearby tree away from the fight. You felt like a car in this moment when you collided with the tree, it was painful and shook your entire being; this was the second time in 24 hours had your body been subjected to being a walking talking collision dummy. ‘God damn it, that bloody Oni is going to kill me before the Yokai even has chance’ you thought, rubbing the back of your head. Your eyes dart up to watch both Kunikida and Dazai fight, noticing the differences in the way they fight.

Kunikida is a manhandler, punching, throwing and tackling any Yokai that approaches, and then occasionally using his gun only to injure, not to kill. Dazai however, seemed to be a master dodger, sliding nonchalantly to the side with a lazy laugh, tripping him effortlessly.

Whilst the Yokai fought, the antlered Yokai noticed you slumped against the tree, slightly concussed. He sneaked over to you and yanked at your arm, it was forceful and you could feel the sheer power in the Yokai’s strength. You yelled out as he dangled you above the ground, as much as the Yokai who attacked you earlier that day were scary, nothing compared to staring certain death in the face. There was a subconscious urge to just allow this Yokai to just kill you, just so it would stop the painful beating of your heart in your chest.

“You smell so sweet, little human,” he hissed. “I think I’ll take a bite.”

“Y/N!” Kunikida barked, shooting his gun directly at the Yokai’s arm, causing it to drop you to the ground as it recoils in pain. “Keep a safe distance, god damnit!”

“I’m trying!” You shouted back, narrowly dodging another swipe from the injured Yokai. “But your definition of ‘safe distance’ is apparently right in the middle of danger!”

“If you’d just stay put—”

“Stop yelling at me and focus on not dying!” You snapped.

Kunikida growled in frustration but threw himself back into the fight, dispatching the Yokai with a ferocity that made your breath catch. For someone so rigid and controlled, his movements were fluid, almost graceful as he wielded his weapon with ease. For the first time, you had noticed his hands, the way they gripped at the Yokai that seemed to continuously get up after being knocked down. You saw his veins pop on his forearm and-

‘Can my brain just shut the fuck up for one second. Now’s not the time’

After what felt like an eternity, the Yokai were defeated, sprawling unconscious on the ground. In the centre of them, Kunikida and Dazai stood triumphant. Dazai seemed totally unphased by the whole ordeal, but Kunikida was panting, his veins filled with adrenaline; this was something he was used to feeling on an intense mission, but something about seeing you being in the Yokai’s clutches had flicked a switch within him.

You remain slumped against a tree, your heart pounding as Kunikida approached, his expression torn between anger and relief. “Are you hurt?” he asked gruffly, his hazel eyes scanning you for injuries.

“I’m fine,” you said shakily. “Thanks to you.”

He looked away with an unreadable expression. “Good. But you wouldn’t have needed saving if you’d stayed behind me like I said.”

“Here we go,” you muttered. “Lecture number eighty-seven.”

“Y/N—”

“No, really, I get it. I’m a ‘liability.’ I’m ‘too stubborn.’” You crossed your arms, glaring up at him. “You know, maybe if you didn’t treat me like an annoying side quest, I wouldn’t—”

“You are not a side quest!” he snapped, his voice louder than he intended. His words seemed to catch the both of you off guard, and for a moment, he looked genuinely flustered.

Before you could respond, Dazai sauntered over, clapping a hand on Kunikida’s shoulder. “Well done, you two! Another successful mission. Though, I have to say, the chemistry here is electric.”

“Shut up, Dazai,” Kunikida muttered, his face beet red.

-

By the time the three of you returned to the Agency, the Tanuki were safely scampering back into the forest, their little tails wagging in gratitude. The mission had been declared a success, though not without the usual complications that seemed to follow you and Kunikida like storm clouds.

Inside the main office, Kunikida stood rigidly in front of President Fukuzawa’s desk, his report meticulously detailed and delivered in his signature no-nonsense tone. Dazai lounged in a chair nearby, nodding along occasionally but clearly more focused on teasing Kunikida than contributing to the debrief.

“...and the traffickers have been neutralized,” Kunikida concluded. “The Tanuki are safe, and we’ve eliminated the immediate threat in the region.”

Fukuzawa listened quietly, his stern gaze moving briefly to you, who stood quietly off to the side, unsure of what to do with yourself. Finally, he nodded. “Well done. However, the matter of Miss Y/N’s safety remains unresolved.”

Your ears perked up, glancing nervously at Kunikida, who stiffened as if anticipating what was coming.

“Given the circumstances of your soul-binding contract,” Fukuzawa continued, “and the dangers that remain in the spirit realm, she will need to stay close to you, Kunikida.”

“President Fukuzawa,” Kunikida began, a hint of desperation creeping into his voice. “With all due respect, surely there’s another solution. Perhaps someone else—”

“Someone else?” Dazai cut in, feigning surprise. “But Kunikida, you’re her destined protector now. Isn’t it romantic?”

Kunikida shot Dazai a glare so sharp it could have sliced through stone, but Dazai only grinned, clearly enjoying his discomfort.

Fukuzawa silenced them both with a raised hand. “This is not up for debate. Kunikida, you will ensure her safety personally. She will stay with you in your dorm.”

You blinked. “Wait, dorm? As in your room?”

Kunikida’s face flushed a deep red. “That’s entirely inappropriate! There must be—”

“Enough,” Fukuzawa said firmly. “This arrangement is temporary. She is only here for 30 days until she is able to return to the mortal realm, 30 years of your life is nothing, you will adapt.”

Kunikida opened his mouth to argue further but closed it when Fukuzawa’s piercing gaze met his. With a sigh of defeat, he nodded. “Understood.”

-

Kunikida’s dorm was exactly what you had expected: meticulously organized to the point of perfection. The books on his shelves were arranged by size and subject, his desk was spotless, and even the air smelled faintly of something clean and herbal, like freshly brewed tea. It was the kind of space that practically screamed ‘don’t touch anything’.

“Wow,” you said, looking around. “This is… intense. You’d make a great minimalist influencer.”

Kunikida ignored your comment, his focus entirely on setting up a makeshift curtain in the center of the room. He strung up a rod and draped a thick cloth over it, dividing the space in two. On one side was his perfectly arranged futon, a single traditional Japanese bed laid out like a show room. On the other side, was a simple yoga mat he’d hastily rolled out for himself.

“Why the curtain?” You asked, watching him fuss with the placement. “Afraid I’ll sneak a peak?”

“Don’t be crass,” he snapped, adjusting the curtain for the third time. “But yes, this is to maintain some semblance of privacy. I refuse to share a bed with you.”

You raised an eyebrow, at first you felt a pang of disappointment, almost immediately followed by a sly grin spreading across your face as you speak through the makeshift curtain. Your eyes spoke of mischief and feigning innocence, something Kunikida was accustomed to with Dazai, but with you…its different. “You say that like I’d want to share a bed with you…what if I ordered you to share a bed with me?”

Kunikida’s cheeks turned pink before glancing away from your gaze. ‘Such an insufferable, inappropriate woman’ he thought.

“Just stay on your side,” he muttered, turning his back to you. “And don’t touch anything.”

“Noted,” you said with satisfaction in getting him a little flustered. You changed out of your clothes into a nightdress that the Oni Yosano had given you, a bit clinical, but it will do. The first thing you noticed after flopping onto his futon, was how surprisingly soft it was, too soft for the rigid bastard Oni. It even smelt like him, nuzzling your face into one of his pillows. For whatever reason, the smell was a comfort to you.

“You know, for someone bound to protect me, you’re not exactly rolling out the welcome mat.”

“Your survival is my priority. Comfort is not.”

You rolled your eyes but decided not to push him further. Instead, you pulled the weighted blanket over yourself, exhaustion finally catching up with you. The day’s events replayed in your mind—the fight with the Yokai, Kunikida’s fierce determination to protect you, even his ridiculous attempt to lecture you mid-battle. Despite his gruffness, you felt oddly… safe.

“Thank you, for saving me… again”

Nothing but silence could be heard from the other side of the curtain, at least till a small, gruff voice replied.

“Don’t mention it”

It was cold, but at least it was an acknowledgement.

It didn’t take long for you to fall into a dreamless sleep, snuggled within this annoying Oni’s futon; you could tell it was going to be one of the best nights sleep you’d ever had.

On the other side, Kunikida sat cross-legged on the yoga mat, his back straight and his hands resting on his knees. He tried to focus on meditating, but your face was the only thing popping into his minds eye. At first, he tried to suppress those images. He had only met you earlier, but your whole presence was the bane to his existence. He’s helped humans who had fell into the spirit realm before, several times in his years as an Oni, but none have ever given him so much as a headache, compared to you.

But still, the knowledge that you were in his futon right now, stirred something within him, especially with the threat of ordering him to share it with you… ‘God, this woman. I need these 30 days of hell over with’.

After giving himself an internal therapy session, he inhales as to let out a sigh, only to be met with a strange scent, causing his Oni senses to go haywire. His eyes snapped to the curtain… another Oni?

His sharp senses picked up the lingering trace of the antlered Yokai from earlier, clinging faintly to you like an unwelcome shadow. It made his skin prickle with unease. Yokai could mark prey with their scent, making them easier to track, to own. If that creature decided to come after her again…

Kunikida clenched his fists. He had to do something.

Moving silently, he hesitantly approached the curtain. It took a good few seconds to work up the courage to peak through the curtain to see your blissfully sleeping form. Your breathing was soft and even, as if this sleep was long overdue. He noticed how small and out of place you were in his futon, and yet…right at home? The vulnerability sent a pang through him that he didn’t entirely understand.

Carefully, he crept forward and knelt beside you. His Oni instincts guided him to the source of the scent, on your wrist and arm. Although he couldn’t see it, it was almost as if he could see the miasma surrounding your body. He had to get rid of it.

‘He will track her down’ he tried convincing himself before gently taking your arm from the bed, noticing the fact that you were a deep sleeper. ‘He will smell himself on her…he will hurt her…’ he leaned down and nuzzled his head against your arm, feeling and relishing the smoothness of your skin, making sure to get rid of the Yokai’s scent and replace it with his own. It was a primal act, one that would serve as a warning to any Yokai who dared come near you: ‘She is protected. She is mine.’

As a final precaution, he raised your arm up further so that his lips graze over your wrist, kissing it lightly as a sort of silent declaration. Here, he was one step away from sinking his fangs into you, to taste you. Gods, your scent was so intoxicating, a balm to the soul and unlike anything Kunikida had ever smelt, ever felt before. You were so, so tempting… Something about simply holding your arm to his lips was oddly peaceful, grounding in a way he couldn’t explain.

Your presence, chaotic and infuriating as it was, brought a strange calm to his usually controlled and intense mind.

Kunikida let you go and stood over by the curtain, his eyes watching your sleeping form as he reflected his thoughts and feelings. His mind wandered, but a little too far for comfort as he retreated to his side of the room. Kunikida settled onto the yoga mat, closing his eyes, let out a slow breath. Protecting you was his duty, yes. But the contentment he felt with having you here? That was something else entirely.

• Next Chapter ->

[baizhoobies]

— bsd twitter links / visuals ! part... multiple !

featuring . dazai, mykola, kunikida, akutagawa, yosano + bonus (separate).

notices: fem bodied reader. make sure to log in to twitter ! i dont fw whatever the notes in the posts say so please ignore them ! this part includes multiple chars because my inbox has quite a few reqs of visuals with different chars so instead of spamming them i decided to make them into one single post. i couldn't help myself with the bonus sorry chat...

— dazai.

handjob while he plays video games.

picking up his pace ! make sure to keep up <3

he can be pretty rough when he's not lazy wants to be.

↑ some more.

choking you while fingering you. ughh i need.

llllloves using toys on you. he's so mean about it too.

on the agency's couch...

absolutely undeniably dazai coded.

— mykola.

he loves it messy. or making you a mess, you choose.

changing positions every minute cause he wants to try literally everything.

surely he can go deeper. and faster.

anywhere? anywhere.

loves dressing you up.

↑ and himself as well.

— kunikida.

loves having you give him a titjob.

sucking him off.

he is absolutely folding when you hug him during sex.

slow n deep.

he finally fucks you on his desk.

he's already trembling once in your arms.

— akutagawa.

please give him a handjob. he'll fold.

tries to keep his mouth occupied because he's not sure where to put it.

hugging him while riding him.

he's so gentle like you're porcelain.

this. just kiss him and cockwarm him and he's gone.

his everyday routine.

cuddly on the side <3

does not have a breeding kink however loves just filling you up.

morning.

— yosano.

riding her in reverse cowgirl.

sucking her strap while she holds your hair back for you <3

overstimming you with a vibrator.

↑ and making you wear her skirt while at it.

quickie in the agency's restroom when you're needy.

riding her.

fingering you n choking you.

sucking on her tits when she comes home after a tiring day.

+ bonus !

— chuuya.

after aftercare.

↑ some more.

you're both needy at work so he takes you to the pm headquarters' restroom to take care of it.

slapping your ass & rewarding you after.

this w him is justtt.

he decides to take the initiative.

part 1 for — dazai / chuuya / fyodor.

(ignore) requests that were for these characters utc !