badcactus27

[badcactus27]

Look at my cat

[badcactus27]

If you have $12,000 you can buy this and send it to someone you don't like and they will be stuck with fun clown ride for all eternity

[badcactus27]

beautiful women named scam likely keeping call my phone

[badcactus27]

put a shirt on that beast!

[badcactus27]

Jeffery Dahmer was one of the worst serial killers because he partook in can of bull jism

[badcactus27]

In my defense, they both start with s, they are both squishy and we own a lot of both of them

my husband just accidentally called the scrub daddy a squishmallow

[badcactus27]

events are probably my second favorite thing to set in motion

[badcactus27]

is this your first time getting prepositioned online?

no people say all kinds of prepositions at me online

[badcactus27]

My wife when on vacation: the water here tastes funny

Me: sometimes water in places is different

Her:I think it tastes funny. I want bottled water

Me: your palate is weak and stale. You need to expand it. I have drank from all 10 oceans. No water can harm me

Her: there are only 5 oceans

Me: there used to be 10. I drank half of them

[badcactus27]

Me talking to wife

Me: hello titty lady

Her: hello big dick man

:))

[badcactus27]

bdsm night is canceled bc my husband ate too much beef and threw up :-(

[badcactus27]

For smiting evildoers

[badcactus27]

I didn't understand love until just now when WY wife and I carted simultaneously ❤️

[badcactus27]

[badcactus27]

I didn't understand love until just now when WY wife and I carted simultaneously ❤️

[badcactus27]

#guess who has 4 thumbs and 2 tacos?

my husband has declared we are having a “white people taco night”

[badcactus27]

my husband says i’m karlach coded but tbh i’m more laezel coded bc i am very no nonsense lol