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"Cake" #6

My local Waitrose doesn't stock it.  Ditto Tesco and Sainsbury's.  The local baker said "what for".  The staff in Lakeland looked at me blankly when I asked for this until a "more experienced" lady suggested I looked for it on the internet. 

So from the foothills of Holmfirth and via the interweb and Amazon, this oddly suspicious looking package has arrived at my desk ready for the wonder that is "Cake" #6.

Lisa B

[badassbakers]

Cake #4

This is what you get when you combine a text from the boss and a powerful oven...

Looks like I'll be in the office kitchen at 0dark:30 attempting round 2 then....

Lisa B

[badassbakers]

"Cake" #4 and 5 and Cake #6

Cadbury’s Product Count = 4

Just realised I forgot to include the ice cream (?! in the photo...

Lisa B

[badassbakers]

December got in the way...

Oh, it was so difficult to choose from all the stiffened card invitations that lined the shelf above the roaring log fire - all the various red carpet events, exciting dinner parties and glamorous A-list gatherings kept us busy for the whole of the holidays... (or the more than likely reasons that kept us too busy to be badass in December: holidays, buying & wrapping presents, writing cards, visiting family and of course seasonal illnesses like flu and non-seasonal but very strange illnesses like labyrinthitis)  

Anyway, this is the ingredients list for next week:

soft margarine / soft brown sugar / eggs / self raising flour / Bourneville cocoa / soft cream cheese / caster sugar / vanilla ice cream (!) / Cadbury's Buttons / seedless raisins / liquorice shoe lace / lime jelly / blue food colouring / butter / icing sugar / yellow food colouring / Cadbury's Creme Eggs / glace cherries / marshmallows / angelica / bananas / Cadbury's Flake / chopped nuts / egg whites

So it's safe to say we will be back with a bang...

And finally, after nearly 30 years, I will finally get to make the "cake" I always wanted on my birthday - and it's not even my birthday! 

Lisa B

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[badassbakers]

"Cake" #3 - Scottish Fingers

  Today we have been abandoned. While Lisa and I appreciate that Carla has booked annual leave from work, neither of us recall authorising her absence from the weekly baking session. We hope the below suffices to show the importance of her future attendance.

The chosen recipe for the week was 'Scottish Fingers'. Really, they are the same as shortbread fingers (with a Flake on top to provide the Cadbury's link). We believe it was re-branded as a Scottish recipe just so it would sit more comfortably on the same spread as the Loch Ness Cake (such treats still await you, dear reader).

Today's first strangeness occurred when the ingredients for the shortbread base were combined. Other than the butter, they were all dry foodstuffs, so didn't seem likely to stick together enough. After re-reading the recipe six times, we went ahead and poured the floury rubble into the baking tray, before trying to squash it into place using a variety of unhelpfully shaped kitchen implements. The tray then went into the oven and Lisa put together the wet ingredients for the caramel covering.

The second strangeness occurred once the shortbread part had baked. The recipe insisted on the caramel being poured on straight away, and the cuts made while the caramel was still hot. Of course, as quickly as the knife parted the caramel, it had glooped back into place again.

We resolved to let it set for five minutes, headed back upstairs to get some work done and promptly forgot all about it. Half an hour later we made eye contact, swore and rushed downstairs again.

Carla, this is why we need you. Please come back. Now.

    Sarah

[badassbakers]

"Cake" #3

Cadbury's Product Count = 1

Lisa B

[badassbakers]

Cake #2 - Bonfire Cake

Marzipan may look just like Play Doh, but shaping it into recognisable characters certainly isn't child's play.

Sadly I missed the main decoration part, but Lisa tells me that forcing Cadbury's flakes into a pyre resulted in as much chocolate being shredded onto nearby surfaces as made it onto the cake itself.

I did arrive in time, however, to gently place the marzipan Guy Fawkes* atop the cocoa-based firewood. Midway to cake, head and body parted company.

A lick of water stuck him temporarily back together again, but Guy continued to suffer accidental beheadings every time the finished dessert was moved.

This cutaway shot shows A) some of the sugary flames beneath the flakes in more detail; B) the popularity of the cake amongst colleagues; and C) Guy's final death.

*There was an X-Factor-style vote for the winning Guy Fawkes, with an unexpected late entrant. My husband, convinced that cake decoration would be easy, challenged himself to create a better Guy than me.

After 15 minutes he created the character on the right, before retiring from the craft forever.

Facebook friends then decided who would be the finalist, although a few unhelpful people declared them 'both sh*t'.

Sarah

[badassbakers]

Lessons learnt

1. Scales = buy cheap, buy twice. 

2. Always grease the bowl.

3. 50/50 red and yellow food colouring does not equal orange.  

4. A spatula is a sound investment.

Lisa B 

[badassbakers]

Cake #2

Cadbury's Product Count = 2

Lisa B

[badassbakers]

Happy Halloween - Cobweb Cake (Cake #1)

We had to start somewhere in the book, so chose this little blinder to celebrate Halloween.  

Lessons were learned - my haphazard butter icing technique is probably best left from now on to the Queen of Icing, Carla -  I will stick to prep work.

Other lessons learnt:

1. I will try to remember to put the bowl over the pan of hot water first before throwing in the chocolate to melt - chocolate water is not part of the recipe

2. Making butter icing is very messy at first - icing sugar gets everywhere (surfaces, floor, walls and my hair?!)

3. Assemble the cake and finish it off in situ - do not pick it up and try and ice around it

4. "You can always add more icing, but not take it away"

5. Invest in a pallet knife

6. Add food colouring s-l-o-w-l-y

7. If you can't find liquorice laces anywhere substitute them for cola laces instead

8. Carla rules at "putting together" 

9. Disposable icing bags rock

10. To prevent grated fingers when grating chocolate, it's just best to leave the last little bit that's melted into your skin - and eat it. Just remember to wash your hands afterwards :) 

Lisa B

[badassbakers]

I have plenty to do of an evening, but I'm very easily distracted... I'm going to go for 6 next time : ) 

Lisa B

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Cake #1

Cadbury's Product Count = 3

Lisa B

[badassbakers]

Of course, this was the next Field Notes notebook in the box - it was meant to be...

Lisa B

[badassbakers]

Day 1 - BadAss Bakers, LunchTime Cake-Makers

How it started...

"Patricia Dunbar, you are a genius"

I saw the book for the first time in 20 years at my mum's house and had a flash of inspiration... but my mum wouldn't give me her copy, so I had to hunt down and buy my own. 

Then I roped Carla in to help me out with the project.  We decided we could make stuff during our lunch hours at work.  

And then we got Sarah excited by asking her to think of a good name - and she ended up joining the team as officially awesome photographer (you'll be able to see the difference on her posts) and amazing wordsmith (ditto)

The 3 Caketeers - one for all and all for one*

*Disclaimer: this does not mean eating all the cake between the 3 of us -  we will share the joy with the wider team at work!

Lisa B