average-and-dull - Tumblr blog

[average-and-dull]

I’m really very tired of living this particular life.

[average-and-dull]

[average-and-dull]

I feel as if I will never stop staring at the green light across the bay

[average-and-dull]

Theres a million reasons to leave

It’s the “i’m just not ready” after you bring me to a wedding

Its the “if you keep asking me it will push me away” after you bring me to Sunday dinners

It’s the “i’m super tired I am going to head to bed goodnight” when I know you aren’t home or even in town because I am waiting at home with the groceries you asked for

It’s the “I see myself with you, but you aren’t mature enough physically” after I tell you i’m uncomfortable because of my past

I see the red flags flowing in the wind 

However, I think I might be colorblind....

Because every time I try to walk away from you I end up walking into your home again.

[average-and-dull]

Just a “thank you” would do, but thats okay.

[average-and-dull]

You can leave me again, and I will be okay. Just remember I may not be here when you get back this time. I am not just an option for you to fall back on when your number one priority falls through. I am better than that. 

[average-and-dull]

I will no longer be sitting at tables where I might be the topic when I get up.

[average-and-dull]

[average-and-dull]

“My love for you will no longer justify you mistreating me”

—

[average-and-dull]

Im so deaf to your red flags that even your lies sound so sweet to me.

[average-and-dull]

I feel safer here...

[average-and-dull]

[average-and-dull]

I’m starting to get to the point again where I’m so lonely I feel like a burden. I feel everyone would be better off if I was gone. Not dead, because the sun will rise again. Just absent until I feel like my presence no longer plagues the people I care about.

[average-and-dull]

The place in which my dreams live and die. I want to change the world, but I can’t keep pushing with nobody by my side to hold me when I need to break.

[average-and-dull]

Put me back in the air over mountains and oceans where I can run away from the tsunamis inside of my mind.

[average-and-dull]

Rent is free in a mosoleum.

[average-and-dull]

First people weep, then they whisper. That’s when their perceptions of you start to differ because you aren’t there to defend yourself when you aren’t there at all.