autisticraccoonwitch

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while they share a similar base flavor, dick tastes more umami while pussy tastes more acidic, though recent menstruation conveys an overwhelming metallic flavor that some diners object to (though i am not one of them). recommended wine pairings are

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Sorry if it’s a little cramped- had to make this all fit in ten photos. Hope you guys like it….. and again…. sorry Andrew

Follow me on Webtoons

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NATM Texposts 7/???

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Please imagine Octavius seeing that "what did the Romans ever do for us" Monty Python bit for the first time. Thank you.

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in absolute tears about the pride module at my work

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I didn’t realize you were the person who did the fanfiction tag drinks.

ahah yeah that's meeee!!

If you guys are interested they are all available as stickers on my RB!!

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Liked reading the responses to this post soooooo

Physical touch:

Gift giving:

Acts of service:

Quality time:

words of affirmation:

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DRAWTECTIVES IS B A C K BAYBEE!

So excited for Season 3 - I can't wait to see what the crew has in store for us! ♥

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@caterpillarinacave Octavius might canonically eat rats and you're like the only person I follow who would understand the gravity of this revelation

Romans will see a mouse and eat it

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YORK CAN READ?? (NOT CLICKBAIT!!)

Bonus:

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i want to write something nice and meaningful about fiddleford not hating gubby but i have to pack so this is all i have in me

transcript/screenreader version below cut because it's kind of long

image ID: a screenshot of a text file i wrote of a quarter-assed fanfiction about fiddleford and the shapeshifter. many words are misspelled and there are countless grammatical and punctuation errors. end image ID.

screenreader-friendly image transcript:

once upon a time fiddleford was hanging out in the bunker. bunkers are man-made underground spaces so you would think it would be really cold because places that are underground are usually cold. well you would be right but fiddleford was really hot today in the bunker because he was working so hard and sexily. he was sticking out his nonexistent ass as his head was buried in some machine thing i don't know engineering.

suddenly ford came up behind him. "hello" said ford.

"agh" said fiddleford and he was startled and banged his head against the machine and got a huge concussion and lost consciousness for a couple hours. but when he came to ford was still waiting there patiently so they continued their conversation. "what's up."

"look at this thing i found" said ford and he held up a pile of slime.

"that's disgusting waht is that. is that like a dead jellyfish" asked fiddleford. just then the slime moved! and took the shape of the wrench that fiddleford was holding (i forgot to mention he was holding a wrench but trust me it was there the whole time).

"what the hell is that." said fiddleford.

"it's a shapeshifter ❤️" said ford and he held the wrench up to his his lips and kissed it tenderly. for a split second fiddleford felt a little bit jealous of a wrench but stopped feeling that way because it was stupid. "i am going to raise it as my son" finished ford.

fiddleford watched as the wrench changed back into a grub thing and it jumped onto his head and started sucking on his open head wound. "idk it's kind of ugly" he said.

ford frowned. "fiddleford... i thought you of all people would be more accepting of guys who are a little bit different..." he said gayly.

fiddleford felt bad he didn't want to make ford feel isolated. and the grub was actually making his open head wound feel better or maybe he was just getting numb to the pain from blood loss. "well okay 🙂" said fiddleford and then they raised shifty as their child and lived happily ever after. the end. end transcript.

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happy drawtectives season 3 to all who celebrate!!! ♥

bonus: pov you just found out that your beautiful son lost his memory. AGAIN.

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this just in: the psychic mummies have taken manhattan

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(trying to make small talk) so how bout that daintree river banana

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I feel cheated. no one on Reddit told me that tumblr is a serotonin factory. Keep liking and reblogging my posts please thanks