aumphloushemintyme - Tumblr blog

[aumphloushemintyme]

Your straight male friends after two beers: "Hgey man can I smell your hair"

Your friend with the haunted shamisen: [plucks a baleful chord of ill portent]

[aumphloushemintyme]

[aumphloushemintyme]

Because I’ve lost control of my life

[aumphloushemintyme]

[aumphloushemintyme]

The trans girl explains all the stuffies names to the one night stand and he dutifully listens. The names are a little mundane but that's fine.

In the morning she wakes up and greets her stuffies, and there's one more than yesterday.

[aumphloushemintyme]

It is important to check your windows carefully each day. For you see, some of them might actually be Evil Windows, which kill and eat windows before taking their place.

If you do encounter an Evil Window, the best thing to do is to stay absolutely still and/or perform a hula dance until thursday evening, at which point the Window must make a call to Society 32. At this point, you will have the opportunity to embarass the Evil Window in front of its higher-ups, causing to leave your house in fear of being Defenestrated.

[aumphloushemintyme]

sorry it has led to WHAT

[aumphloushemintyme]

tired: mermaids are all women

wired: much like elves, merfolk are mistaken by sailors for being all women because they have long hair and are very pretty

[aumphloushemintyme]

Fuck. Those fuckers at the store sold me No Purpose Flour again. What the fuck do I do with this

[aumphloushemintyme]

“Each dot represents 5,000 hogs.” World Geography. 1948. 

[aumphloushemintyme]

Curious Zelda

https://twitter.com/curiouszelda

https://www.instagram.com/curiouszelda/

[aumphloushemintyme]

jocelin carmes

[aumphloushemintyme]

wishing all my fellow aroaces, aromatics, asexuals, and everyone under that spectrum a very happy

LOVE LOSES!!!

[aumphloushemintyme]

no stars to be seen out tonight

[aumphloushemintyme]

mermay

[aumphloushemintyme]

why didn't they just leave pompeii when the volcano erupted? were they stupid?