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I gr8ly dislike how engaging with Gay Shit TM will prompt the al gore rhythm to automatically show current events news stories. let me like little lesbian fan art in peace, please.

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Tiny Chef | Midnight in the Garden of Henry and Ruby [💚]

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"𝐈 𝐝𝐢𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐇𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐲𝐰𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐝𝐨𝐨𝐫. 𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐚 𝐦𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫." Remembering screen icon Jayne Mansfield... Born on April 19th, 1933 in Bryn Mawr, Pennsylvania Died on June 29th, 1967 (age 34) near Slidell, Louisiana ❤ Portraits of Jayne Taken by French-Canadian photographer Gaby (aka: Gabriel Desmarais), Los Angeles, 1957.

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tragically I think the worst part of getting older is having to surrender to the reality that everyone u'll ever know is just going to act like a person in the exact same way everyone else always has all the time. there really is no deviation from that.

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i dont enjoy pick a card or general collective tarot readings as i find them to be disappointing because of course I have yet to experience a great windfall of fortune or suitors but I do with relative regularity pick the card where the reading amounts to "maybe u should... have some fun????" and I extra hate those.

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I am feeling very moody and bad!! I am so bored of waiting for things to get better, it's been like 25 years, just UGHHHHH just yuck just ew what is even THE POINT my energy is wasted piloting this flesh prison, I don't want to do this again I am never coming back!!!! I want to be a sound wave for the next 1000 millennia.

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the handyman came today to replace my ceiling fan and I actually had a weeks notice so I was able to clean up my room and be dressed instead of my mom waking me up spur of the moment like "u dont have to get up!!" as if I'm comfortable with a man working in my room while I'm unconscious in nothing but a loose tank top??? anyway I got up at 4 bc that's when I was awake but now it's 1030 and I'm so fucking hungry!!!!!!!!! but I'm too polite to cook something while this guy's here. and he hasnt actually changed the fan yet and it's getting hot in here and I want to take a nap!!!!!

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earlier I thought about shaving my whole head

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this same boyfriend was again present in my time traveling dream last nightttttt

two dreams:

we had a bunch of baby animals, including mice and ducks and a litter of tiny very cute gray french bulldogs. I kept insisting we needed to keep the animals in the house so they didn't get sick from birdflu, but she let all the animals outside to feed them and of course the food attracted all the sick outdoor animals and the sick ducks and sick pigeons are co-mingling with the baby animals and all the babies got sick and were going to die, and I was so mad at her I took pair of scissors and was just going full ides of march on the wall. just stab, stab, stabbing the wall so I didn't kill her, I was so upset she just didn't care about keeping the animals safe from the bird flu.

I was walking around SF with my "charge" (a little girl who appears frequently in my dreams, she is not my daughter but I kind of adopted her?? I dont know her name.), we decided to stop for dinner at a kind of hot pot-like restaurant, we called friends and my boyfriend(??) and mom, my charge insisted on serving everyone but since she's a little girl, she was organizing all the food on the floor. There's a whole bit with a noodle spinner tool that twirls the noodles in tiny perfect little birdsnests and I have to go back after my charge serves everyone because no one has enough noodles. At one point I quick smootch the boyfriend during the meal and I see his face so clearly in my mind's eye. Same guy from the space/time/dimension traveling dream, the one who asked me out sooner than I anticipated. Same SF neighborhood dreamscape as the hairdresser salon dreams.

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saw it today

I've seen 12:34 four times in the last 24 hours

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me, watching the current transits really kick ya'll asses while I'm chilling:

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idgaf if my parents are disappointed in me I'm not impressed by them either

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Incomplete thoughtt but I hate how shein/online shopping has made the "trenndy" type of clothes so easily accessible and I dont mean in a gatekeepy way I just mean u used to have to know which stores to shop at if u wanted xyz look and if u didnt have that store in ur town or it was out of budget for u and ur friends, u wore different things. Like style and fashion used to be very indicative of your surroundings and now every1 in every place buys the same $2 top, like who cares.

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the other night I had just fallen asleep when I heard my cat pawing at the door and crying to be let in. I verrrrrrry nearly got up but then I had to convince myself that nooooo, she's not crying at the door, she's been dead nearly 10 years now

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I made jam :D

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two unfinished thoughts to return to later-

relationships are not businesses or sports: there is no way for a relationship to "fail" (like that doesnt even make SENSE why are u scoring hanging out with a person like the fucking long jump tf bffr)

jealousy is kind of a catch all and I don't think it comes into play as often as people like to say it does re: antagonist relationships/frenemies BUT maybe they WERE jealous of the simple fact that I like myself. that I am DARING enough to think highly of me. bc I think material jealousy is actually really easy to clock and actually very healthy, particularly when you're still growing up.