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If I am uncomfortable in my chair, I adjust my body to find a more comfortable position.

If I am uncomfortable with the temperature, I adjust my clothing or drink a hot or cold beverage.

If I am uncomfortable in a crowded place, I seek a quieter place. Or find a small group I am familiar with.

Discomfort is not a reason to force the world to change. Its a reason to change what you are doing.

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I have so many thoughts right now. I'm sure this isn't a novel idea, or even that new to most people. But I was thinking about racism, xenophobia, and tribalism, which are major driving forces of Right leaning ideas.

I thought about how I don't feel racism or xenophobia, but I used to. I was raised to see others as scary and different and what changed was going to college and meeting people. When you spend time with the "other" you realize that all their differences are a drop in the ocean of similarities.

Then I got psychological. When you see people in your family, it would be a waste of time and energy to think about everything you have in common. The list would be endless and would not help you distinguish you mother from your cousin. So instead, when we want to identify people, we focus on what is different.

When you are surrounded by people who are very similar for most of your life, it makes sense that you would see someone from a different culture as radically different from you. It takes a bit of effort to identify what is different about the guy down the road with the same religion, 9-5 job, food, routines, car, etc. But its pretty easy to identify what's different about someone from another country.

Its obvious if you think about it, that you share so much more in common with a foreigner than you have differences. Its just that those commonalities are so obvious, our brains are practically hard-wired to ignore them.

I'm not making any excuses for racism or xenophobia. But I think it helps to understand why its so easy for people to fall into it.

The quickest way to make someone less racist is to force them to spend time among other cultures, like I was in college. But as easy as that sounds, its getting harder and harder for that to happen. Especially in the US where 3rd spaces are practically non existent.

I don't even know if I have a point. I'm just frustrated. I want to be mad at the people who voted for Trump. I want to write them off as idiots or monsters. But like I've said, we have more in common than not. However misguided they might be, they have reasons for what they believe and we can't fix anything by hating them.

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As a tall, skinny, cis, "straight" man, I would love some tips for cross dressing. I like the idea of wearing clothing made for women that still fits with my body and makes me look good. I'm just not well versed in fashion.

more cishet people should crossdress. builds a vibrant ecosystem

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Chai tea bag + lil but of brown sugar + apple cider packet + 16 oz. mug of hot but not quite boiling water

it will not Fix You but like. maybe. maybe.

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I've thought about this comic for ages since the first time I saw it. This is the most succinct and yet detailed description of why policing in the US is broken.

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Never thought I would find comfort in the words of a yellow rat. But I truly needed this. The urge to give up is strong today.

We are a very very dumb, stupid people

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Feeling very relevant today in the US.

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Listen, everyone should have access to mental health services if they need it. I dearly wish for therapy to be covered by all insurance or better yet, universal healthcare.

But BetterHelp is not the solution. Betterhelp follows the business models of Uber, AirBNB, and others which "disrupt" the market.

The service they offer is better for the end users, those of us who need therapy. Its cheap and accessible.

But it is so much worse for everything else! It's worse for the therapists who work for them. I dont know about the pay, but I know they are not able to care for their patients as well.

It is worse for therapists with their own practice, because again, BettetHelp exists to "disrupt" the market. Most likely it is losing money, but their goal is to drive small practices out of business, then they can raise prices and worry less about quality. Look at AirBNB.

And in many ways, it is worse for patients, too! Not just in the future if they are allowed to monopolize the market, but right now. Normally, therapists are allowed by HIPPA to disclose some information if they have reason to believe their patient is in serious danger, or is a danger to others. But BH does not allow that because it might effect their image.

I support normalizing therapy and making it more accessible. But BetterHelp is not the way.

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There is something so hilarious to me about toxic masculinity. The more hardcore men become about being manly men, the more homoerotic it becomes.

"Let's build a world where women are obsolete. All I need is MEN!"

"I have to be attractive to women. But I don't listen to what women say because that's not manly. I need another man to tell me I'm hot (to women)."

"Being friends with women isn't manly. I spend all my free time with the bros. Every waking moment I am surrounded by only the manliest men."

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miniminuteman on youtube

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To my followers in the US, I know a lot of us feel hopeless about the future, about the climate crisis, and so many other social issues. That's why it's more important than ever to vote and let your voice be heard. Don't let them fool you into thinking your vote doesn't count, it does. I was born in China where there is no democracy, no voting, and I will never take the privilege I have now as an American for granted. I've already voted and I hope you will too. Especially the younger generations who will have to suffer the worst of the climate crisis, this is our future in balance, let's vote for a better tomorrow!

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While I am still anxious about the election and worried about the inevitable second coup attempt, I did find a reason to be hopeful. While I was voting, there was a woman who received a round of applause for her first time voting. And a poll worker said, "You wouldn't believe the number of people we've had this year voting for the first time."

I'm in a red state, but I don't think anyone new is voting for a fascist. Maybe a few, but I bet they are overwhelmingly voting for Harris. So that brought me some hope.

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robot mecha anime that is almost entirely about all the hundreds of mechanics and engineers that make the mech possible. the actual mech is only ever shown in parts in the bay or as a blip on a radar. the whole this is shot in a way that makes the machine as eldritch and incomprehensible as the monsters it is fighting. maybe it’s set before digital video so all glimpses of it in action are bad angles on terrible analogue monitors. such that you never even really lock down how its anatomy works. the pilot can be there and be important, but like it’s like a weird eldritch horror take on office politics.

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Getting a new computer soon. Where’s that windows debloat guide people post every so often