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Based on actual events

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the most disorienting thing thats ever happened to me was when a linguistics major stopped in the middle of our conversation, looked me in the eye, and said, "you have a very interesting vernacular. were you on tumblr in 2014?" and i had to just stand there and process that one for a good ten seconds

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New Character Unlocked!!!

Berries & Chocolate Basket

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ps5 brain monday

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check out this disc that seemingly manifested itself at my work. it contains:

an illegal copy of Microsoft office

a copy of 7zip and winrar

a keygen that plays the hunger games theme song when opened and has a red button that when you click it just closes the entire program

an informative .txt file that tells you to turn off all the firewall and antivirus on your computer

definitely no viruses

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goncharov

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how do you draw wet hair

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so i’m currently working at a law firm and the other day one of the attorneys was talking to me and he mentioned that he’s “not very confrontational” and i was like you are?? a lawyer???

and he said “yeah but in court there are rules. i can argue with some shmuck in a suit in front of a judge no problem, but when i leave the courthouse and go home i’m not gonna argue with my wife about dinner. there are no rules in our kitchen. i would die.”

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im literally not exaggerating when i tell you guys this video saved my life

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the epidemic of grown adults playing tiktoks at full volume in public is rampant why are you acting like a 7 year old with their first ipad you have a mortgage

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Anybody who says cats only play along with human nonsense in order to obtain food has never seen a hungry cat completely ignore a full bowl of food in favour of giving you shit because you did not correctly perform the Dinner Ritual.

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Was curious how far Ithaca was from troy today while listening to epic the musical and rereading the illiad and I found this map

I think odysseus would have been better just to walk😭

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anyway